OG_Girl Posted October 18, 2003 Salaam Alaikom all: my nomads i need some advice if u can help. what u would do if ur family refused to marry one u want and tell u they will disown u if u marry him. thanx salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuCkY Posted October 18, 2003 SaLaaMz, WeLL first they have to have something tangibLe that they dont Like about this man-a very very good reason otherwise i suggest you taLk to them about how you feeL. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OG_Girl Posted October 18, 2003 Thanx Lucky for taking time and reply, sister i don't see any good reason to refuse him other than they want other guy for me . salam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dawoco Posted October 18, 2003 OG_Girl, as long as he is a good muslim, thats all that matters. And I think you should calmly talk to ur parents about meeting him and deceiding before refusing point blank. They might meet u half way, if you listen to them and respect their words even if you disagree with it. I'm sure that they only want whats good for you and your future happines. They must have a good reason to oppose you on this. Ask them why, and try to see their poiunt of view. Good luck sister, hope it works out well. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted October 18, 2003 Tell your parents how you feel and what your logic is. listen to them...don't ever talk back to them....always speak with respect. Remember that at the end the choice is yours all you have to do is take their concerns into consideration thats all. good luck hon. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
x_quizit Posted October 18, 2003 hey girl,. ..the way i see it, use ur judgement, and go for what you want. Your parents wont be the one spending their life/time with this man, so therefore you shouldnt go for someone you dont want just because an elder suggested it. Also, ask your parents what they have against your beau, and if its something as trivial as qabil, i suggest u go with your feelings, but if its something serious, like he is known to be an abuser or something, then listen to ur parents. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ManOfWisdom Posted October 18, 2003 Well Mz this is a big problem, no matter what u do,don't do something that u will regret in ur later years. Remember this is ur life, let ur heart and feelings decide for u without making ur parents angry. Be happy and make peace with urself and ur family. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuCkY Posted October 18, 2003 SaLaaMz, No PRob.Did you teLL your parents about the guy that you want?I dont Like the idea of having my parents choose my partner im sure you dont as weLL so teLL them how you feeL.ITs your Life and they are not the ones that are going to be spending their Life with this man they chose for you.GooD LUck. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ManOfWisdom Posted October 18, 2003 Quate from lucky: I dont Like the idea of having my parents choose my partner im sure you dont as weLL so teLL them how you feeL.ITs your Life and they are not the ones that are going to be spending their Life with this man I agree with u lucky, its her live after all and she should look up for herself, if she don't she is weak! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
OG_Girl Posted October 18, 2003 thanx LUCKY,dawaco, flying still,x_quizit and man of wisdom for ur advice thanx million times. salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nephissa Posted October 19, 2003 You go ahead and marry him anyways. Only you know whats best for you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rudy-Diiriye Posted October 19, 2003 og-gal u contradicted yourself. u the one who always use to say that whatever my parents recommend i am cool with that! :confused: now they hook u up and u flip! hmmmm! why! does this dude want breakfast in bed!lol!! in your enviroment, parents have the last word... so just go with flow, anyway, after all whats love to got do with!!! its an imaginary illusion that comes and goes! if u parents approve him... then hes a certified farah! remember your parents wont give u away a to loser, cuz they care about very deeply! think about it so more, put yourself in your parents position and anlyze lil more! u might see the light at the end of the tunnel!!! good luck walaal! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted October 19, 2003 sa wr wb, oooh OG-Girl, sweety, i know what is it like, being there . apart from the advice i will be telling u 1-0-1, i think u should talk to yr parents calmly and tell them why u dont want their choice, listen to them as well. putting yrself in their shoes is always good idea, after all (i know it sounds cliche) they brought u to this world, they know u the best, and they have yr best interest at heart! mmmm sweety. ps. as last measure, remember the choice is yrs, but with their blessing it will be even more blessed union! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted October 20, 2003 I would definately say FOLLOW YOUR HEART... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Man Of Freedom Posted October 20, 2003 OG_Girl. I wish I could advise you..but hey never choose someone you met over your parents...They raised you when you were nothing..They treated you especial and cared you when you were just a little baby..It would be totally sad and disappointed if you had to choose a man you met over your great parents. Your Mom and your Dad would be embarassed if you had to leave their house, the house you grown up.The house that made you what you are today, and the house that shapped your life. When your mom was pregnant with you, she went through terrible situations that cannot be even described in words. The pain she went through cannot be rewarded by anything. It is your choice today..You either leave your parents over the man you thought you love..or you stick with your parents.Keep in mind also that long lasting relationship is not always gauranteed. Think about it before it gets to late and make the right choice.The quality of your life is ultimately shapped by the quality of your choices and decision! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites