Cara. Posted October 21, 2007 Clever-Trevor, one must always be careful with surveys and statistics. Maybe married professional Sistas are too busy juggling work and childcare and housework to go gallivanting to "young professionals" meetings? I bet some of those married men have overwhelmed and overworked wives who could do with some help. Next time these men come to your meeting tell them to go home and give their wives a break Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nephissa Posted October 21, 2007 Originally posted by Yaabka-Yaabkiis: Nothing wrong with encouraging your bf or husband, your goal is to marry the good man ---making him a good man wax xun maaha...again let me ask you invested intaas oo lacag ah to get Career..why not midka aad nolasha la qeebsa laheed..yaab! daaweeey rabaan dadkaan( i meaan gebdhaha somaliyeed) Addeeroo macaan, kaan nolosha la qaybsanayo marka horeba he has to be up to my standards; a successful, handsome, fit, devoted man who is 6'5 . A guy has to have a brain and know how to use it. Invest-garee kulahaa, GAWD..grab a brain...seriously. Who wants a partner they don't value? Nin istaraasho ah, xagee geynee? Illahaaw naga hay. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted October 22, 2007 Originally posted by Nephthys: quote: I think the investment should be a good man. Build him, encourage him.Instead of a dead end career 9-5. Where's KK qax qax qax ha tiraahee? Qax Qax Qax... Guri miyaa markii la build-gareenaayo ani waa yaabee? Wah... On a serious note though, the way I see it is as long as we can carry a corversation, his educational/professional background is not as important...There are many factors to consider, not just if he is as professional as you are...Haduu wax bartay isagaa isubartay, adi kuuma baran dee... I would rather have a factory working guy who is honest, loving, understanding, has sense of humour, and can carry a converstion and so on; than a well educated liar, cheater, doesn't know how to treat his woman... And as long as all of his parts are in reasonable working order, he is good to go... Besides, once women reach certain age, waxaa ka dhacdo 'ku qabatee qadar allah'... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hodman Posted October 22, 2007 Diamond in the rough kulahaa! Why are the sistas the ones to compromise? Besides there is much more to marriage than a degree or the lack thereof. I think people should quit obsessing about this topic of marriage. It happens if it is meant to be and if it does not then there are worse things than being educated, successful and single Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pujah Posted October 22, 2007 Marriage is overrated, who said you have to be married to be happy horta? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Legend of Zu Posted October 22, 2007 ^^^ Islaamaha buraanburka tiriyo ayaa dhahay! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Legend of Zu Posted October 22, 2007 Originally posted by Ghanima: First time I agree with LOZ. What is wrong with these described "men"? :rolleyes: First time I agree with LOZ kulahaa, most of the time you agree with me silently and then you giggle to yourself...admit it! Cheers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Som@li Posted October 22, 2007 Originally posted by -Serenity-: Although the cause you're championing is noble, and one should always look internally in the community for prospective partners, reality is that most of these girls do not have the luxury of time to make these boys into men. I know I certainly dont, and altho some would consider me a spring chicken right now , and fresh where career is concerned, I certainly do not envision setting up home with someone who needs to trek through school for another 3-4yrs and then another 2-3yrs to find his footing. Thats a minimum of 5yrs. For a girl who has her life in order, and whose next goal is to get married and have a family, thats too much of a wait, effort and scraffle with an unhealthy dose of risk and uncertainly. I wouldn't be quick to advice anyone to take that route. [/QB] That is the whole difference between us? why cant you go for a decent uneducated Farah, when He could do the same if the situations were reversed, I think it is not abt being smart, it is just hoping and wishing for the best,more,like greediness, Educated and professional Halimos only want some1 more educated and advanced, till for some it is too late, my advice to the girls is ,find always a balance, and dont ask for resume,if you meet a guy....walaahay I remember a lady who was a doctor,and married this man who dropped High school, and she invested in him, after some years,he was running this huge business,worthy millions. On the other hand, it is true that some Farahs feel insecure abt girls who are more qualified than them,(natural male instinct) How many Somali men stay at home to look after the kids,while his wife is the bread winner? Clever_trevor, has a point, it is time for mediating. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sharmarkee Posted October 22, 2007 ^^I think C.Trevor is warning girls against the same fate of Condeleez Rice, at 55 yrs of age and still playing with Bush's dog. ha noqon Guun is the plain somali but to get a life isn't that bad. So do it. Don't live your life in regret. Honestly honey all you can do is find a Faraax and get married you wont regret it when you hold the kids on your left and have your earned degree and high salary on your right. Hooyo waa malcaamad how daymol'aan. dadkaaga wax bar. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted October 22, 2007 ^LOL. True! Who says you can’t have it all? The Faarax needs to be decent though, mid reerka dhaqi kara, not any old Faarax. And no, he doesn't necessarily have to have a degree [though there are many educated single brothers out there], there are other routes to success, people. T..T.B. Still, we need to do away with this sisters are too educated BS. One can never be too educated and more so our community, which is in dire need of educated sisters. Lets stop stigmatising education and careers for our girls, brothers. This is not the 1920s, in rural Somalia. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-Serenity- Posted October 22, 2007 Originally posted by Zenobia: The Faarax needs to be decent though, mid reerka dhaqi kara , not any old Faarax. And that ladies and gentleman is the crux of the matter. If he cant fulfill his simple role in the ‘union’, muxuu aroos ka soo dooni? Encouraging girls to marry men who don’t bring anything to the table is ludicrous not to mention is the perpetuation of the real problems of our community. There are too many people marrying and reproducing without being able to shoulder the responsibility of a home and family. This is why we have recently been proclaimed as the community that is the maximum burden on social systems in the UK! While having an educated woman in the marriage is a plus, if she has to reproduce, earn and look after the family, that’s just plain silic iyo sakaraad. I wouldn’t do it and I wouldn’t ask anyone to do it. Having a family is not worth all that effort! While a degree or education shouldn’t be the only deciding factor (being able to take on the responsibility of taking care of a family should be), it’s important to acknowledge that education is a means to a good livelihood. It is the most certain (not absolutely certainty) way to earn a decent living. So there should really be no compromise there. Then there is also the small matter of sharing a life with someone who doesn’t value the things you do – learning! p.s. You should take Cara's advice on dismissing those married men in your forums. Maxay meesha ka soo doonayaan anyway? We all know these 'young professional meet-ups' are nothing but a cover for matching young faaraxs and xalimos who are on the same level... not that there is anything wrong with it . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-Lily- Posted October 22, 2007 How incredibly simplistic to assume the one thing that will sway a woman's decision regarding a man will be a degree. As Zenobia suggested, there are millions of Somali women who haven't had the opportunity for education, are you complaining about the few thousands who were lucky enough to have a chance at education and possibly a career? Perhaps the question should be why are Farax's intimidated by smart sisters? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted October 22, 2007 ^^^Right on. There are too many people marrying and reproducing without being able to shoulder the responsibility of a home and family. This is why we have recently been proclaimed as the community that is the maximum burden on social systems in the UK! I could not have said it better. Then there is also the small matter of sharing a life with someone who doesn’t value the things you do – learning! The most important thing me thinks...and it is what will lead to the end your marriage ( you decide you won't give up on your values & goals) or happeness in life ( you give up what you wanted out of life) First time I agree with LOZ kulahaa, most of the time you agree with me silently and then you giggle to yourself...admit it! I don't giggle, have you not heard? I have a deep manly hearty laugh and the only time you have ever made me laugh like that was ages and ages ago, a comment about the image you get when you hear the term "sleeping around" HAHa It still makes me laugh! lool I like the smart sisters on this thread, the sloppy Farax answers are not even addressing the point!... Apart from those agreeing with the smart sisters! HAHa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sharmarkee Posted October 22, 2007 ^^HAHAA kulaha, waad isu camirtay, we call people like that isu camira - Xariifad cadilan Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted October 22, 2007 ^^^I was not including myself in the list I was admiring dear. So siidee baan isugu camiir?? :cool: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
