Valenteenah. Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by CLEVER-TREVOR: CARA, You want some Common sense my sista? Really,? Is it not true that women in general are in fact %90 Emotion and %10 in logic? And vice verse in men? First off,that itself should demonstrate how common sense should really be looked at. Hello! When and where did those figures come from? Did I miss something? Because if I was 90% emotion/10% logic, I would surely have topped myself with a bucket of bleach years ago. Other than that, this topic is very funny. Actually reminds me of a line in Bride & Prejudice (the bollywood version).... "I may be healthy, vealthy and vise...but [there's] no life without wife!" In this case, it is more there's no life without a hubby. *Slaps Zu on the wrist for calling Serenity short* Only I'm allowed that privilege! :mad: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jamster Posted October 23, 2007 Let me be bold about this! The crux of the issue gents and ladies is that many who wants to marry someone of “high calibre” is someone who is not happy with the way they have been brought up. I know this sounds radical, but consider the following. Most of the family units (Somalis) either both parents didn’t have the Tertiary education (arguably many parents in the west didn’t even had the benefit of secondary education) as such the life these young bright driven ladies don’t want to create a home in which one of the principals shares something of commonality with their parents--- this might not be apparent to them, but it is arguable that it is psychological thing. Anyhow, coming back to the point squarely this is an apparent phenomena as most of the educated guys are on paper “westernised” but their thinking remains to be SOMALI as such their outlook in life is completely at odds with their credentials. As such, they marry women whom they emotionally share with this “Somaliness”. On the other hand, the ladies seem to embrace this new life if you will. Their education and career leads them to shrug off these assumed “Somaliness” thusly, because there isn’t plethora of educated Somali men (most of which have married women thy share emotional ties with; some of you might say “married down”) they remain single as they are frustrated. Also, why would any educated guy in early 30s marry a career woman with similar age? If he is successful and has the monetary power to take care of a family he has a rich pickings of 21-24 years university educated hijabified Somali girls who would be happy to oblige his offer provided he is a smooth operator!. Fahiye PS: Now, I sit back and watch ladies fighting their way in to annihilate me off the forums Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by Fahiye: PS: Now, I sit back and watch ladies fighting their way in to annihilate me off the forums LoL. Isn't it amusing how each person states their opinion and then assumes they've touched a nerve? Bless. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
-Lily- Posted October 23, 2007 Let me be bold about this! The crux of the issue gents and ladies is that many who wants to marry someone of “high calibre” is someone who is not happy with the way they have been brought up. Complete rubbish, since every parent will tell you they want a better life for their children than they had. They would advice their sons and daughters to find spouses that are at least on their ‘level’ and on the same ‘wave length’ if not better. What parent wouldn’t? What parent would advice their child to go for a less than ideal partner and to just live with it? Anyhow, coming back to the point squarely this is an apparent phenomena as most of the educated guys are on paper “westernised” but their thinking remains to be SOMALI as such their outlook in life is completely at odds with their credentials. As such, they marry women whom they emotionally share with this “Somaliness”. On the other hand, the ladies seem to embrace this new life if you will. Their education and career leads them to shrug off these assumed “Somaliness” Another baseless assumption. Reading textbooks by dead old white men and obtaining a certificate to prove it does not make one loose their ‘Somaliness’. If this assumed ‘Somaliness’ is refusal to be dominated, put down and taken advantage of, then most certainly they can do without it. Also, why would any educated guy in early 30s marry a career woman with similar age? If he is successful and has the monetary power to take care of a family he has a rich pickings of 21-24 years university educated hijabified Somali girls who would be happy to oblige his offer provided he is a smooth operator! What makes you think any career-orientated Xalimo would want to be with such a Farax whose sole aim is to oppose her career aspiration and to ‘oblige’ him to begin with? Isn't she trying to avoid such a man? And since when do hajibified sisters have no career aspirations? What makes you think these young things will not have the same ambitions as their older sisters? It's comical if not tragic to see so many Farax’s on this forum advocating the ‘you will get old and useless at the height of your life, 30+ if you don’t settle for the 1st Farax that comes round. Now! Immediately!’ mentality. It all reeks of insecurity. We must be the only nation in the world to complain of an 'epidemic' of educated, successful and single women. Someone please find us a cure fast! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted October 23, 2007 ^ Serenity and Ghanina LOL! Zenobia, cornered? Ambitious, aren't you? I was trying to end the b*tching, build bridges , inject some sisterhood - and this is how you respond!?. Joke. JOKE! Naa Faaraxinta iska dhiciya intaad idiknu isku jeedaan, lets get back to those percentages.. 90% maxay? 10% what? The backbone of ayo? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ducaysane Posted October 23, 2007 Gabdho, Waxaad rabtiin sheega. Ilaahaw maad 20 degree haystaan. Gabadh 25 ka weyn yaaba waayahaan xagooda fiiriya. Alow yaa idin dhaha meesha ka kaca oo hada guursada. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted October 23, 2007 ^^Haadaan adgu wax kuu faaleen, nimaan Appreciate gaariyah ooh waax kuu falayah jiriha. I promise you, it won't be their loss. Lily You broke it down for the slow ones! It's comical if not tragic to see so many Farax’s on this forum advocating the ‘you will get old and useless at the height of your life, 30+ if you don’t settle for the 1st Farax that comes round. Now! Immediately!’ mentality. It all reeks of insecurity. We must be the only nation in the world to complain of an 'epidemic' of educated, successful and single women. Someone please find us a cure fast! Right on! Lol @ val. Zenobia: It was not me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ElPunto Posted October 23, 2007 Originally posted by -Lily-: It's comical if not tragic to see so many Farax’s on this forum advocating the ‘you will get old and useless at the height of your life, 30+ if you don’t settle for the 1st Farax that comes round. Now! Immediately!’ mentality. It all reeks of insecurity. We must be the only nation in the world to complain of an 'epidemic' of educated, successful and single women. Someone please find us a cure fast! I don't know about 'so many Farax's' but then I wasn't counting. I think the bottom line is that 30+ means you are less than 10 years from 40 - which is really the cutoff for having children and a home life. You're looking at diminishing opportunities for marriage let alone finding the right partner at least in our culture. It's important to be aware of this and make a choice rather than just stumbling into it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gediid Posted October 23, 2007 Waar aduunkan bal eega.Waxa topic laga dhigayaa eega.I guess qof kasta waxa ku dhaco ayuu moodaa in dadka oo dhan in eey ku dhacaan.Clever trevor saxiib hit that commnunity college near you and you wont have to face the shame of being dumped by "smart women" or haddi kale lower your standards a lil and maybe go for a girl who dropped out in middle school..... Hablo maxaa leysku heystaa ma calaf baa.Mid kasta Ilaahey marku u qoro ayaa indheeda kor arki donaan ee oogaada waa la kala horeyn doonaa uun..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paragon Posted October 23, 2007 Fahiye: Let me be bold about this! The crux of the issue gents and ladies is that many who wants to marry someone of “high calibre” is someone who is not happy with the way they have been brought up. I know this sounds radical, but consider the following. Most of the family units (Somalis) either both parents didn’t have the Tertiary education (arguably many parents in the west didn’t even had the benefit of secondary education) as such the life these young bright driven ladies don’t want to create a home in which one of the principals shares something of commonality with their parents--- this might not be apparent to them, but it is arguable that it is psychological thing. Erm, not entirely true actually. My grandfather was a scholar and I still seek 'high calibre' women (not girls) in the interest of intellectual amusement . PS: Would be lucky if I get to like what a well-rounded woman has to say when on tiffin. Might decide to marry her. (the word 'Marry' sounds so dirty) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Skipper Posted October 23, 2007 Hello everyone. Shiiid how in the earth did i miss such an intresting topic? Clever trevor thanks sxb for bringing up this great topic. For sure we need to have such a deep discussion from time to time to substitute "My son did this today" and "Abdullahi Yussuf was awesome in his last speech" treads. Now back to the issue at hand. Due to how our culture is structured it is exceedingly hard for a xalimo to get married to a farax who doesnt have a university degree. Why? Because he would never be accepted by her family.The rejected farax might be more caring, responsible, intelligent and has the know how to get his daily bread but alas, that is not enough for the parents daughter to saction a marriage. The other thing is if a girl is educated and the farax isnt then he will be too afraid to start a family with her for fear of being under her authority due to her university degree. In an ideal world this would have been irrelevant because having a university degree doesnt mean that the farax is perfect. Lily: What makes you think any career-orientated Xalimo would want to be with such a Farax whose sole aim is to oppose her career aspiration and to ‘oblige’ him to begin with? Isn't she trying to avoid such a man? And since when do hajibified sisters have no career aspirations? What makes you think these young things will not have the same ambitions as their older sisters? Sister lily with all due respect to you i think you have a zero knowledge of ISLAM. Because if you were more into islam you would have known that that "Oblige your man" is one of the things a a good muslim woman should do. KK: And as long as all of his parts are in reasonable working order, he is good to go... KK since when are men described as in the same words as machines? When you say all his body parts what what do you mean exactly? Ghanima: My dear Marriage and kids are a plus in life, not a must or a necessity for living. It is not the soul purpose of your existence nor the centre of everyone's universe. For some it is a privilege, for others it is the accessories of life. Ghanima trust me abaayo when i say you dont want to be a multi millionaire in the same class as Oprah and raise dogs like kids. I cant stress enough the importance of having kids and family. I am not married yet therefor i cant tell how it feels to be married and have kids but what i do know is that being married has more a of fringe benefits than meet the eyes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cara. Posted October 23, 2007 ^You know Oprah. Oprah doesn't know you. When you get married you will still know Oprah. Oprah still won't know you Zenobia, I was really trying to make a point about blanket generalizations. I thought KK would take offense, and then we'd have a lesson well-learned. But I'm beginning to think Kool Kat is actually just plain Krazy Val, it's in fact true that you're 90% sugar and spice, and 10% everything nice. I have the chemical analysis right here to prove it LOL @ Gediid. Then best to prepare for it with grim resignation eh? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Instinct.Poet Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Gediid: Waar aduunkan bal eega.Waxa topic laga dhigayaa eega.I guess qof kasta waxa ku dhaco ayuu moodaa in dadka oo dhan in eey ku dhacaan.Clever trevor saxiib hit that commnunity college near you and you wont have to face the shame of being dumped by "smart women" or haddi kale lower your standards a lil and maybe go for a girl who dropped out in middle school.....) How dare you utter such insult.Disturbed my equanimity !! Next time, in promulgating your esoteric cogitations, or articulating your superficial sentimentalities and amicable, philosophical or psychological observations, beware of platitudinous ponderously. Let your conversational communications possess a clarified conciseness, a compacted comprehensibleness, coalescent consistency, and a concatenated cogency. Eschew all conglomerations of flatulent garrulity, jejune babblement, and asinine affectations. didn't meant to be sesquipedalian, just gasconading a bit. but than again, I bestowed to my literature professor. Fahiye Let me be bold about this! The crux of the issue gents and ladies is that many who wants to marry someone of “high calibre” is someone who is not happy with the way they have been brought up. I know this sounds radical, but consider the following. Most of the family units (Somalis) either both parents didn’t have the Tertiary education (arguably many parents in the west didn’t even had the benefit of secondary education) as such the life these young bright driven ladies don’t want to create a home in which one of the principals shares something of commonality with their parents--- this might not be apparent to them, but it is arguable that it is psychological thing. Anyhow, coming back to the point squarely this is an apparent phenomena as most of the educated guys are on paper “westernised” but their thinking remains to be SOMALI as such their outlook in life is completely at odds with their credentials. As such, they marry women whom they emotionally share with this “Somaliness”. On the other hand, the ladies seem to embrace this new life if you will. Their education and career leads them to shrug off these assumed “Somaliness” thusly, because there isn’t plethora of educated Somali men (most of which have married women thy share emotional ties with; some of you might say “married down”) they remain single as they are frustrated. Also, why would any educated guy in early 30s marry a career woman with similar age? If he is successful and has the monetary power to take care of a family he has a rich pickings of 21-24 years university educated hijabified Somali girls who would be happy to oblige his offer provided he is a smooth operator!. Couldn't have said better. This is just reality as we know it today. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nephissa Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by ThePoint: I think the bottom line is that 30+ means you are less than 10 years from 40 - which is really the cutoff for having children and a home life. You're looking at diminishing opportunities for marriage let alone finding the right partner at least in our culture. It's important to be aware of this and make a choice rather than just stumbling into it. Not entirely true. Most cases the cut off age is 53, not to mention the help of hormone pills women can be fertile past 60. Woosh! There we got another 30 years to produce. Faaraxiintina kalee is waalaayo; you are certainly not the last men on earth y'know? There are successful men of other nationalities ready to snatch Somali women right under your fingers, no matter what shape or age.. waa isku dil hablaha . Idinka uun inikoo lugo xun ha soo dhihina: "these bijis go for the ajanaanibs, nama rabaan." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted October 24, 2007 Originally posted by Skipper: KK: And as long as all of his parts are in reasonable working order, he is good to go... KK since when are men described as in the same words as machines? When you say all his body parts what what do you mean exactly? No comment, talk to my lawyer... "these bijis go for the ajanaanibs, nama rabaan." LOL... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
