Marriage Marriage!!

[RedSea]

Originally posted by Rose:

To the sister that's started the post-May Allah reward you..If one can get married get married it would greatly reduce fitna/temptation

I am a brother, but Jazakalahu Khayran.

 

Qac Qaac, congrats we have heard you got married.

[hodman]

Originally posted by Pucca:

 

all things have both the good and the ugly...marriage is no different.

*exits* [/QB]

True that; even though the good generally outweighs the bad

As Somalis say

"Guurku waa god madow adoo gacanta la galay oo kale; ama dahab baad kala soo bixi ama bahal baa kaa qaniini!"

[Jamilah]

Originally posted by hodman:

quote:Originally posted by Pucca:

 

all things have both the good and the ugly...marriage is no different.

*exits*

True that; even though the good generally outweighs the bad

As Somalis say

"Guurku waa god madow adoo gacanta la galay oo kale; ama dahab baad kala soo bixi ama bahal baa kaa qaniini!" [/QB]

LOOL . What a great proverb I think it neatly puts marriage into perspective.

[chubacka]

Originally posted by Modesty:

 

The reason as to why I choose not to get married is mainly because of the whole process of marriage and expectations especially from our culture.

 

 

 

 

Have you really decided you do not want to be married?

 

I find this quite hard to believe, do you really know how you will feel in 3 years time?

 

How about when all your friends get married and your family start pressuring you to get married and (god forbid) start making suggestions of possible grooms.

 

Keep an open mind sis, remember marriage is an religious obligation and remember you can adopt when your married thus providing your adopted child with a lovely father as well as a mum.

 

:cool:

[Som@li]

remember marriage is an religious obligation

 

:cool: [/QB]

Marriege is recommended, but not religious obligation.

[Arawella]

Marriage is a very risky affair where a risk averse should not venture. It requires sacrifices by both parties, which can either flourish the relationship or simply cause havocs.

No wonder many young people prefer to stay single and choose spinsterhood to divorcee.

[man_in_malaysia]

is it that there is growing demand in marriage market segment at SOL ..maaasha allah that is great unless u guys dont think about temptations..

[Reality Check]

Marriage is not as pretty as some of you are describing it to be. The reality is that over half of the marriages are doomed to fail. And the ones that stay married, some are not even happy in it, especially out here in the west. I can count with one hand how many happy marriages I know about in the Somali community. Just ONE!!

 

Marriage is an obligation? As in, the longer one stays unmarried, the more sin? C'mon now, show me some proof (that is - if you even can).

[Umm al_khair]

It is difficult to find the right person, some one you can trust and with all these points you have mentioned

First the guy must be--

1. responsible ( able to handle family duties)

2. good character (not an aggresive, but patient person)

3. Knowledgeable (knows the rights of his family upon him provided by the religion offcourse)

4. Iman ( most important choice; must have faith in Allah)

5. finally, he must be of YOUR CHOICE

 

I feel it is almost impossible to find such a person these days that is why marriage is the last think on my mind.

[Endeavour]

Umm al_khair ofcourse marriage is the last thing on your mind if you intend to find the perfect man rather than the right man. I think the only thing close to a perfect man is one with good character and one willing to comprimise.

 

As you can see we are living in era were the male species have dramatically declined in number so if you are not willing to be a second or third wife I suggest give up looking for Mr perfect. Start searching for Mr right and if he is a man of morals try and dust him up a bit and shape-him into your 'ideal man'

[Janna]

Marriage has become the most talked about area of discussion. I am surrounded by marriage obsessed women, hormones raging. Others feel the need to marry in order to prove to loved ones or the community they are secure. Girls around me inform me marriage for them is a form of security. It's depressing to hear marriage when it comes down to means of escape. Marry and respect yourselves. Marry and lower your gazes. Marry and increase your iman. Marry and be patient with your wife/husband. Marry if you cannot control yourself. Marry and be happy.

[Endeavour]

ALexus- what is your point I seem to have misunderstood you. What are you trying to say that you hang out with freinds that depress you? are all of your freinds getting married feel left out it seems you are insecure lexie whats the matter? Have your freinds non-stop marriage discussion driven you overboard perhaps even derailed you from your studies? Let it all out Lexie--I would like to here what you are trying to get at. I just never quite understand what you post Alexie you try and act like the big bad girl of SOL. are you middle child ? need attention? Why are you constantly so negative have you got to say anything positive ever???Your generalisation is beyond tolerable dear. Calm down.

 

 

I dont know lexie it seems you are yearning for somekind of love. You are so obessed with what other women do with their lives. Oh look at this Halimah she has run away with a farah oh look at this khadijah she is bleaching herself oh look at my freind they are obessed with marriage oh look at so-and-so. You never ever look at yourself do you Alexie. I think its about time you mind your business and give somali sisters around the globe a break.! You shouldnt care what purpose they marry for.

 

*SHID*

[Janna]

Originally posted by Endeavour:

ALexus- what is your point I seem to have misunderstood you. What are you trying to say that you hang out with freinds that depress you? are all of your freinds getting married feel left out it seems you are insecure lexie whats the matter? Have your freinds non-stop marriage discussion driven you overboard perhaps even derailed you from your studies? Let it all out Lexie--I would like to here what you are trying to get at. I just never quite understand what you post Alexie you try and act like the big bad girl of SOL. are you middle child ? need attention? Why are you constantly so negative have you got to say anything positive ever???Your generalisation is beyond tolerable dear. Calm down.

 

I dont know lexie it seems you are yearning for somekind of love. You are so obessed with what other women do with their lives. Oh look at this Halimah she has run away with a farah oh look at this khadijah she is bleaching herself oh look at my freind they are obessed with marriage oh look at so-and-so. You never ever look at yourself do you Alexie. I think its about time you mind your business and give somali sisters around the globe a break.! You shouldnt care what purpose they marry for.

 

*SHID*

:rolleyes:

You seem irritated by my comments. Do you happen to fit the descriptions of khadijah and halimo? My points were not meant for you directly to understand. It seems like you are the one who is desperately craving for my attention. The previous post was not intended for you. I was expressing my opinion, using my surrounding environment to help explain the situation many lonely, loved sick sisters are under. I'm a young, intelligent gabar cadeey who is not jealous or insecure about others, who is very thankful she has not found herself in problematic situations. The reason why I speak of others is because I have never faced and never will face any of their never ending dilemmas. Marriage for them may be securing them but it certainly has not left me insecure. Within the next two/three years I will have establish a career along with the process of finalising many other positions, inshallah.

 

Endeavour

You read into things too much. Welcome to cyber world and remember I'm a character, portraying the role of a non-exist person. I am not facing the middle child syndrome, nor does it exist.

 

My final words to you, play your virtual character and stick to the topic of discussion.

[Endeavour]

Miss Lexus--- I unfortunately dont crave for the attention of those that live both in denial and in ignorance. Your comments dont irrate me I just find them ridicilous and pointless. It seems you argue for the sake of arguing. You constantly choose to say things that have no substance nor base.

 

Thankfully I am not in the position of Halimah nor am I in the position of Khadijah. I can rattle on about myself like you have, but then again I am a woman of standards I couldnt possibly stoop to the low level you have.

 

Its amazing how you consider yourself to be an intelligent woman yet you fail to grasp no sister puts herself in a bad situation.

Who we end up with is out of our hands. Who knowns what situation you will end up in a couple of years. Rather than Thanking the lord above you choose to make statements like "I will never be in their situation" as if you know what your situation will be!

 

Lexie I suggest its time for you to stop analysing other pupils situation to your liking. You a have a fetish for fabricating things. I wouldn't be suprised if everything you say is load of crap.

I dont know why I even bothered with you. Its clear your neurons are not functioning whenever you type. Let me know when you get some maybe then I might think about wasting my precious time on you. Till then *fiiamaanilaah*

[Resistance]

^^^ Girls will always be girls.