The smell of burning flesh

[Curly]

This is a tragic real life story and probably not the first nor the last to happen.

 

I’d like to introduce you all to a woman who lived all her 30 years living in a city dilapidated by poverty and war. She wasn’t the best of people, but what can you expect from someone toughen to the core from years of having a hard life.

She was a divorced woman living with her only living relatives two small and tired old women. She spent here days washing, cooking and cleaning for them, tending to their needs like a robot without emotions or care. After she finished her daily chores she’d spend what little money she had on skin bleaching creams. She skin had gotten so frail and pock marked it actually diminished the whole point of lightening herself as a hope of beautifying herself.

Her venomous mouth was constantly cursing, arguing and bickering with anyone she dared. Years earlier she had come close to death after being stabbed several times in the chest by women she had clashes with.

 

When I met her she was perfectly healthy but still as venomous as ever, she was surprisingly nice to me, but I put this down to me being a foreigner. Anyways while I was with her I noticed she had a pretty vibrant nightlife. She had many male friends and one in particular who was forever hanging around her.

 

A year later I heard she was pregnant and to be married to that very guy who had been hanging around her like a rain cloud, this guy happened to also have another unsuspecting first wife.

 

People as per usual blamed her for the whole ordeal, and even accused her of badgering the guy to marry her, they said she seduced him and this was solely her fault. And of course the guy took responsible for getting her pregnant and agreed to marry her but decided that he would not live with her.

 

Of course she did loved this guy very much and within a couple of months of giving birth news arrived to us that she had tried to commit suicide and set herself alight with kerosene and would inevitably die. She died later in hospital with the supposed rumour that her death maybe accidental after she tried to fill an empty lantern with kerosene.

 

The whole incident made me evaluate a lot of things and question what would drive someone into suicide and of all the ways she could have done it she chose to the burn the skin she valued and cherished so much and leave behind an infant so easily.

 

what's your take on this?

[Warrior of Light]

Sue

what's your take on this?

 

Uncertainity? Guilty conscious? I think the lady for once in her life thought she had it all. A husband, a child,, promises. But you later said that the husband didnt not live with her. Must of broken her heart tremendously. Im not for suicide, but on reading the peice I think the emptiness in her heart caused her to do so.

 

Allah Ya llam.

[Warmoog]

Subxanallah. She came across as a restless and misunderstood kind of person to me. I mean, she had no one besides the two old ladies and, judging from the way you described her, I’m guessing she had few genuine friends (if any). Sure there may have been a lot of male “friends” around her (like Mr. Rain Cloud), but they probably had ulterior motives and weren’t looking out for her best interests.

 

I also think her having been an af-miishaar was sort of a defence mechanism for her. If I was among the last surviving members of my family, and some people were trying to kill me while other gossiped about me, and had no opportunities or hope and no one to befriend, besides a bunch of creepy married men seeking women to shack up with, I’d probably be rude and full of misplaced anger too.

 

Anyway, I couldn’t help thinking the society in which she lived bares some responsibility for her tragic end. People can be so inhumane. They’d much rather label or gossip about a person, than offer kind advice or guidance to those who need it. Unfortunately, the woman's dead now and nothing we say will change that, but - if I had known her or could’ve said anything to her - I would have told her to stay alive for her child, be patient, and have faith.

[NGONGE]

If she were still alive I’d have a different take on things but since she committed suicide, I really am indifferent to the whole thing. I detest suicide and the feebleness of people who commit suicide. I loathe the misplaced pity people give to those who commit suicide. A mad person killing themselves is understandable but someone sane? Why should I waste my breath on someone like that? Suicide is a crime worse (or equal to) rape. It should be comprehended in such a way and looked upon with harshness and unreserved disgust. :mad:

[Paragon]

Subxaanallaah! Is all I can say.

[Thinkerman]

Subhanallah That is very tradgic end.

 

What a take from this is that i am trully blessed to have my family around me and soo many good friends to share my good times and bad times with.

 

We forget very easliy what we have been blessed with, and we are too quick to look at what we 'feel' whe are mis-fortunate with.

 

Its not for anyone of us who didnt know this unfortunate person to judge her, all i can say is that she clearly didnt have alot of people to help share her burden and advice her.

 

Its tradgic story

[Valenteenah.]

what's your take on this?

 

Life is a b!tch and then you die?

[checkmate]

Subxanallah..... that's wat ppl do when they don't have IIMAAN n YAQIIN... i suppose she will be added to the list of ppl who failed the IMTIXAAN OF DIS DUNYA.

what's your take on this?

she deserved it.... SO MACSONKOR TO HER

 

asxantu

[Curly]

I know in Islam suicide is a Haram act, but I think a few of you are being alittle emotionless. We should let Allah punish her for her sins and refrain from judging and condemning her ourselves.

 

I was more concerned about what drove her to it and why she felt that she had no choice but to resort to suicide. I know life is a ***** but people survive worse right...like my next real life story, which was also set in the same setting.

 

This woman was a lot younger. She couldn’t have been any more than 23 years old when I met her in Somalia in such a desperate state. But when this ordeal happened to her she was around 22 years old.

 

She was walking through the city centre late at night; it was during the rainy season so it was heavily raining with mud everywhere. When five men in a pick up truck attacked her and gang raped her, they left her for dead in a ditch.

 

She staggered back home the next morning as soon as she could, she had been beaten badly. And when she told her family and friends of what happened they accused her of sleeping around.

 

But after seeing the bruises on her body they believed her and went in search of the five men who had attacked her. It was later found out that the five men concerned were involved in a serious accident and all but one had survived. They guy was severely hurt and was left disabled.

 

Now this is the shocking part! After they man was returned to the city and had recovered he and the woman were forced to marry, due to that shame that was brought on to the family.

 

The woman was forced to marry and live with this man, but because she was upset about the whole thing she decided to start a court case to get him jailed. The court case was long and lengthy and by this time she was already pregnant with his child.

 

I met her when she was heavily pregnant and depressed; she was in tears constantly and didn’t know what to do, when her family were so unsupportive of her situation.

She asked me for money so that she could leave the city and go to another city where she had other supportive members of family that would help her out.

 

So I helped her and then a few days later we received a call from a man she had got a lift with in a nearby city that she had been hospitalised for high blood pressure and risked loosing her unborn child. Her family blamed her for all that had happened to her and were too busy wondering who had given her the funds to travel, which of course I didn’t confess to….lol

 

I didn’t find out what happened to her after but I can’t help but think what I would do in her situation and after giving it thought I think that I would probably be weak enough in Iman and feeble enough to pity myself and take the cowardly route out and put an end to my life.

 

But hey Allah doesn’t burden a soul... more than that soul they can handle.

[NGONGE]

I know in Islam suicide is a Haram act, but I think a few of you are being alittle emotionless. We should let Allah punish her for her sins and refrain from judging and condemning her ourselves.

As an English member of parliament would say: I refer the honourable lady to the post I made earlier.

 

Still, meeting all these people and getting emotionally attached to all their problems can't be that healthy for someone so young! Oh, well, I suppose it's gives you valuable experience in life. It will also (unfortunately) turn you into a bigger cynic than I am.