Lefty Posted August 16, 2003 khayr...it's very interesting you brought up this issue. First..I don't think Somali fathers are the same level as African-Americans. Most somali males are good fathers, loving kids, and good role models. However, some domestic problems always excist and it's part of familyhood, no one is denying that. In my own personal opinion...I don't think any mentaly-healthy father would abandon his kids by any circumstances but since coming to Western world, some wives believe they can play both roles of parenting and forced some fathers to step aside. Maybe there're other reasons but that's what I believe have caused so many single mothers in diaspora and not in somalia before or after the civil war. I've seen some divorced ladies who won't allow their kids to see their fathers even though the kids asked for it. Some parents keep pointing fingers at each other but the funny thing is how strangely their children would think as they grow up year after year. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zakariye Posted August 16, 2003 s/alaykum This topic really hurts, i am one of the somali fathers that is being talked in here, and i for one strive to better each and every day the well being of my children, which is must to every somali father. So if one bad apple ruined the life of innocent child, why blame all of us, you know Somali fathers are the most loving parent you can have, less hassle ezy to deal with them, and wonderfull. I do want my kids to do better and if i found out they are not doing well walaahi i will ship them back to somalia, i told them, and when they become mature and understand how harsh life is, then they can come back. w/salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zakariye Posted August 16, 2003 s/alaykum Oh brother king you are lucky for ur upbringing, and i wish to hear some positive stories like urs, not only the negative aspect fo parenthood. c/salaam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miskin Posted August 16, 2003 this is an important topic, i must say and is somethind that exists in our community. i dont think somali fathers are in league with the likes of African-Americans but if the somali fathers don't get thier acts together then they will get there sooner or later. i know a handfull of those irresponsible fathers, but that doesn't mean they all are. let us pray for the abondened kids and their helpless mothers, let us pray for our foresaken values, let us pray for the return of family unity and dignity, let us pray and let us pray hard. peace Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Bambina Posted August 16, 2003 I dont believe all da somali fathers r irresponsible.Sum might take care of their children ,sum others dont ,das life.But just cuz a few somali fathers didnt support their children dat doesnt necessarily mean dat all somali dads r the same. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted August 16, 2003 We can make a million excuses why they don't pay child support...But the fact still remains they don't pay...There's always an excuse why they can't afford to support their children...When in fact, when he was married to the mother he was the Man of the house and provided for his children and wive... I am not talking about the older generation, I am talking about the younger generation, the ones in thier 20's, 30's, and 40's...It just seems that when most men divorce their children with their mothers...And that just isn't fair...It is alwayz the mother who struggles with the children, while the father is enjoying life as a single man... I would definately encourage any single mother who isn't getting any support from the fathers, to turn to the system and make them pay, whether they like it or not... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zakariye Posted August 16, 2003 s/alykum Kool-kat, xaasid weynaadey baad tahey maxaad isugu direysaa, miyaadan wax garad aheyn,change your nick and no longer consider you kool, you r not. Ladies don't listen .Did you really said take them to the system, and let them be arrested, oh man that is so severe mental upnormality, guys if what is said true , go help your children,but don't let you be put in jail or else. c/salam Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted August 16, 2003 Zakariye, I don't think you understood my point...When I said turn to the system, I didn't mean arrest them...I ment, turn to the system as is in go to family court and make him pay for the child support...In which case if he was to ever work, they would automatically deduct the child support money from his pay check...I would never advise anyone to arrest an innocent person, let alone the father of the woman's children...Walee maskaxdaade meelkale eeka fikiroysaa... If he ain't willing to pay volunteerly, the system will make him pay, which is very sad...Cuz any man not willing to support his own flesh and blood, ain't a real MAN... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
