Sisterhood....

[La-y-La]

It is sad that you open up to a person and confide in them, but each time, you have an argument with that persn, they end up telling every bit of what you trusted with them to everyone.

 

I have had a friend f 6 years who felt the need to spread my business everytime she was mad at me.

 

I have never in my life felt that betrayed when I found eveything out, because the sad thing was, we always made up, but everytime she was mad, she would share somethings that I only shared with her, just anything to humiliate me.

 

This is someone whom I have always been on her side walaahi and only Allah knows how true of a friend I have been to her, but I guess people are just cruel.

 

And I learned from this experience to always have a few friends who are close to Allah, because those who fear Allah are less likely to betray you.

 

I think that it is best to just let bygones be bygones, but to learn from it and for me, I just replaced all the anger with positivity and let it all go, alxamdulilah.

[Xalimopatra]

Kooleey

Lol @ Old ladies.It's funny more then anything though wallahida.

 

Jamelia

Your sis.It is about self-image and perception.Sad too because united we would be much more stronger then in a induvidual Biij race.Alas I'm sure their individual struggle must get lonely.Especially if you've no one to share your prizes with eh?

 

Rowda

Walaashiis in highlighting the negative aspects it only prepares us and makes us wiser.The positive will always prevail lakiin in openly discussing issues that we feel are holding us back from blissful sisterhood(ok not completely blissful but as close as possible.lol)&how we can overcome them I hope we can become stronger...As sisters.Good sisters are all around us lakiin aslong as the shaydaan is around whispering in our ears then I'm afraid there will be alot of wrongdoing ma'aha? Anyways Rowda hadaad waqti heeshiid waxaan jeclanlahaa inaan maqlo ra'yigaaga oo ku sabsaan arintaan.In af Soomaali ofcourse

 

Layla

It is sad sistergirl and I know what you mean lakiin what I would advise you to do is to not keep trusting those that REPEATEDLY do you wrong.Ultimately forgive them but be wiser and distance yourself.They obviously dont have your best interests at heart sistergirl

[Blessed]

After a few bad experiences, I used to be sacred of girls for a long time.

 

But, as I grew up, I've realized that I need female company.

 

So, I deal with the negativity by having different categories of friends. I've girlfriends that I have a laugh with, sisters in the deen and a few true friends (mostly family and those who’ve been around for along time) that I trust my life’s ills with. It's a beautiful setup, no drama.

 

It’s also wise to vet people you deal with. A good companion is like a musk maker.

 

If you meet some1 and they start telling you other people’s business or generally speaks ill of others, know that when your back is turned – you’re their feast. As the saying goes, kuu sheekeeya, kaa sheekeeya, hala sheekeysan!

 

P.s People will always gossip, just brush it off , it’s all ajer.

[-Serenity-]

I've never fought with a girl I considered a friend or been betrayed by one.

 

I can usually tell straight away if the person is of a questionable moral character and I distance myself.

 

Besides, friendship is over-rated. I've, as in the case with Blessed, friends with benefits - ones you share something in common with or enjoy just having a laugh. Kooley also made a good point about keeping your deepest secrets to yourself or if you have to share telling your sister, your mother, some1 who has no reason to compete with you or destroy your reputation!

 

Trying to amass friends by spilling ur heart out is a bad bad idea girls. Thats also so 6th grade!

[Foxy]

I must say, I dont know how i missed such a topic nooh! must have been when i was fooling around somewhere in my holidays..then again i am just joking...now lets get back to the matter at hand.......so

 

posted 29-01-2006 15:10

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Hey gabdho....

 

Here are the seven sins that Tyra outlined...

 

BETRAYAL

MANIPULATION

JUDGEMENT

ENVY /JEALOUSY

GOSSIP

COMPETITION

RESENTMENT

 

Now i personally beleive that the above words have been over rated walee.....waa niic foqol niic....

personally me and my best gal mates, havent been in the same country for a wee while yeah, since we all seperated after Uni years/unforseen stuff, we get to see each other once every year or twice a year due to our different work oriented schedules/studies or holidays, and have never experienced non of the above mentioned sins, infact we enjoy each others company since its once/twice in a year and Lord knows that I would Give my own life for the love as I speak for those gals friends of Mine/and am sure they would do the same for me...the bond is just too Priceless..Now I must admit there are some chicks that we use to hang with each other back in the days that we have earased from our memories and I m sure those B***ches have done the same..............

 

But nothing would measure the endless respect and love I have for my loved Gals whether its who we discuss through its the male gender of other ethnicity or the modern farax/Xaliima in existance through cross culture barier we exist within or at differnt levels......simple fact is We only have a simple truely blissfull unconditional bond with a given few friends in this world when it comes to friendship, and that we should all appreciate when it comes our way. instead of bi*****ching and moaning about it just cause we belong in the female gender and we sometime fine a few things to say the least about our beloved close friends....is to think twice and see who we be-friended in our life time...whether our country mate chicks or others.....Lord knows I dont discriminate.....but the least of all we can do is appreciate what we have while we Have it .....from that I do not enforce U to believe in what I believe in. But rather ask Urself in to looking in to any situation with open optimistic view rather than seeing the potentional friend as typical chick who's out there to compete with U or something

 

 

cheers

 

PS I adore my galfriends since I have a handfull thats fiathful and would do the best for them

 

cheers

 

PS most of my close buddy friends are males/females mixed and most my galfriends still stay real

[-Lily-]

I have two bestfriends from high school and I have known them for 12 years now, I know I can tell them anything and they won't even pass it on between each other. I also have a few male friends but they are only good to have a laugh with. For some reason I find myself to be the keeper of people's deepest thoughts, I mean they tell me stuff they don't want to share with their fam or best friends. I know so many things about ppl's lives but when it comes to me I tend to share less, probably because its better that way.

 

I must agree with Blessed , I tend to get nervous when I meet people who like to gossip non-stop about others, it's off putting really. I find myself making excuses for the ones who are being gossiped about.

 

I also find older women love to gossip about younger girls and especially their love life or sucesses and failures, I wonder why a 50 year old would be interested in the live of a 20 smt year old? Strange wallahi.

[Xalimopatra]

Foxy nice to see you walaashiis

I agree that our most loyal friends(Albeit few) should be celebrated more.Lakiin this is what SHOULD be the expected from us all,Sincerity,sadly it isn't.Dont get me wrong I am not trying to downplay the sincere sisters out there because they are out there.Lakiin I hope that by addressing the problems some sisters can do some self reflection.

The only way we can try and lessen the initial shock(later kicking yourself)of being betrayed is by trying to be as cautious as possible.As you said not to trust people so much.

At least trying to make sisters change the way we see each other(pillars of competition ect)by recounting on our own past mistakes or our own acts of foolishness where we've been too trusting or something.

 

In particular looking out for our more naive younger sisters who have yet to expecience any of this.

Maad garatay sis?

 

Waterlily.I know what you mean sis.I am the only girl in a family of 4 brothers so I value my cousins and 2 best friends.Somehow I am always the mediator and the confidante.Lakiin I wouldnt trade it for anything because I dont trust anyone to hold my loved one's innermost sentiments and experiences but me.