Hayat Posted June 11, 2008 i will spear you any finger pointing, but i have observed with much dissappointment that men can be quite insenitive creeps. why must you all ask, why we cant keep our shape after childbirth? why we let go of ourselves? who asks such questions. and why do you guys suddenly consider other options like a second wife after your wife has gained couple pounds? or on a more serious note why do you suddenly lose interest in her, however unexplicit.why is it in every opposite sex debate must the "letting go of yourselves" card also come up. It shouldn't even be a point to refer to. i know most of you males will reply by saying that its just insensitive creeps who dont harbour any affection for their wives, but the reality is i have seen decent minded men who (not in the presence of their wives oofcourse) have referred to this bothering them!!. its always the "i am going to get my wive a treading mill" after she gives birth, in an attempt to prevent her from "letting go of herselve". for gods sake she had to squeeze watermelons out of a walnut and she cant even be given a break. now she has to focus on keeping thin as well!! insensitive creeps i say despite however much you do try to point otherwise. :rolleyes: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
winnie Posted June 11, 2008 physical attraction is important in marriage, and sometimes, women actually let themselves go. im sure youve met such a woman who just completely stopped caring about her looks the minute she got married... some men are guilty of this as well and more often than not "let themselve go" in another arena, like they stop giving gifts, being romantic, helping around the house. getting too comfortable, and taking each other for granted is the underlying issue. i mean, if its just a couple of pounds, (or say, half a person) after childbirth, i guess that is not a big deal; but than there are women who keep that extra weight years after the birth. maybe if they had an encouraging partner they would lose the pounds? i dont think its insensitive to remind your wife/husband that they should take care of their appearance. discussing your spouse with others is completley unacceptable. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted June 11, 2008 Hayat, women have been having babies for years. Having a baby is not an excuse to get as big as house. There is a difference between gaining weigh when you are pregnant and letting yourself go. You should aim to lose the excess fat you've gained and if your husband is kind enough to go gym with you or buy you a treadmill then you've found yourself a good husband I think. It is only fair he still finds his wife attractive and of similar standard he married. IF he wanted big women, he would've married one to start with. On the same hand, a woman should not have to put up with potbelly, fat husband, unless she married him like that. Both men and women tent to get comfortable when they marry and grow in all kinds of direction. Being in shape is healthy part of living. P.s. I don’t like men or women who talk about their husband/wives bad points and shortcomings. SO I don’t think he is a creep if he tells her, but telling the world makes him an ultimate heartless/ inconsiderate creep. P.s.s. In time you would both moderately change in accordance with the natural aging process and your bodies won't be the same (more so for women than men), but extreme changes like tons of weigh that you don't lose after the birth is not excusable. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jacaylbaro Posted June 11, 2008 Having a baby is not an excuse to get as big as house Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted June 11, 2008 ^^What is so funny??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Jacaylbaro Posted June 11, 2008 you've reminded me of some ppl i know ,,,, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chimera Posted June 11, 2008 After birth i will give her 2 months rest then it's bootcamp! little jr will accompany me on the bike while his lovely mother runs the marathon..run baby run...every now again little jr will add his two cents...*Burrp* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted June 11, 2008 ^^^^loool^ I don't think they are allowed on bikes that young 2months! lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted June 11, 2008 I concur with ibti on this one. Adam your mad that made me laugh. p.s how should I say this without losing my woman emancipation movement card,,,,, mhh getting a man is easy, keeping one is the hard. I have seen this so many times, especially in our community, initially the girl was a regular in oxford street, saloon, looked good, took good care of herself and most importantly they knew the purpose of a body cream/comb. But after she got married and popped those kids like a vending machine she let herself go, now she hardly consults the comb/body cream let alone go to oxford street etc, she is pushing a pram with 2 kids in there while 4 more are trailing behind her, in her diraacsheed /man shoes… it’s only a matter of time before the weakersex (her husband) starts looking around. Most of the cases you will see the wife who is 25 looks like she is 40 and the husband still managed to maintain his physic (apart from the occasional fading hair line) now is that fair? Am not cheering for the man because I do believe this is a two Way Street am just saying that’s what I tend to see…. Question: initially was the woman looking good because she loved herself or was it for the purpose of snatching a husband? If it’s the former then its entrapment/ fraud and a reasonable ground for divorce (applying to both parties) if you ask me. ****Please save me the personality etc lets be honest physical attraction matters**** Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted June 11, 2008 Ailments of the privileged. Stuff and nonsense really.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Resistance Posted June 11, 2008 Getting a girl is easy, keeping her is a hassle, letting her go is the hardest. I don't blame a women for letting go of themselves after marriage since they worked all their towards getting a hussie. It all depends on the relationship the couple have tats all Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted June 11, 2008 :rolleyes: @old man Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
STOIC Posted June 11, 2008 ^^^^Young Lady, I don't know why you keep refering Ngonge as an old man.Have you seen his facebook picture?If he stands next to me I will look much older than him (because of my frame).Stop it, for now, will you? before he shows you his boyish look....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cynical lady Posted June 11, 2008 Stoic- because he is a grumpy old man and why are you complaining when he is not? Troublemaker p.s what pictures? Picture of you in facebook and I haven’t seen it. Am disappointed in you, here I was thinking you’re a sharer but little did I know. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NGONGE Posted June 11, 2008 Stoic, Don't fall for Ibti's rumours. That is NOT my picture on FB. CL, You know I'm right, darling. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites