Anger managment

[Ayaan8321]

How many of you have a bad temper,dhaqsi iska xanaaqo...what triggers it and how do you deal with it...

well aniga...i have no idea what triggers it ...the reason that made me start this topic was when i got mad and hit a very close person to me with a saxan on the head...alxamdullilaah that person didnt get serious injuries...and i cant seem to find a way to deal with it....so maybe we can exchange tips..soo daaaya dee :cool:

[Miriam1]

When i first saw ur topic i thought u were talking about the movie, just saw it the other day,

 

anyway I use to have a horrible temper and finally i did hurt someone i loved, my owm aunt.

 

my silly cousin annoyed me so much that i wanted to kill him, but not literally i am not crzy , i just wanted to scare him. So i chased him around the house with a wodden brush, my amazingly patient aunt was yelling at us to stop and aiming for my cousin and not noticing my aunt inbetween us..as they say anger blinds u... i threw the brush it hit my aunt's head and she had to get couple of stiches ! it was perhaps the worst day of my life, i really belief if the hit was any harder her life could have been in danger..so since that horrible day i decided to control myself...Alhamdulilallah it didnt It wallahi was by the grace of Allah

 

this is how i do it

-If i notice the person is going to start up with me on something that will eventually anger me i walk away, dont care who it is, not worth it. Only until i can listen to them with a leveled head will i be there in the same room with them.

 

- Decide if someting is worth your energy, do u really need to argue or fight with this person...is it that important.

 

-And finally if u cant control ur anger hit ur room or some place where ur alone and yell....lol really just yell ur heart out, or if u have thin walls and ur neighbours might call the police, take ur pillow and hit it across the walls as hard as u can...takes away lots of ur energy.

 

Hey hope to have helped..my aunt is okay and even though i still fell guilty she remembers it as a joke! go figure.

END

[OG Moti]

Anger Management is a serious issues specially among somalis, the first of all before we even get to what triggers it, we must discuss anger itself, Anger is temporary loss of sense and mind, and it is a big Opportunity of Shaydan to use that moment of weakness to make human do mistakes, however every problem has a solution, our islamic religion has a solution for every problem, before we get to that i must say consultation is important and our people dont see that important.. read quran, pray 2 rakco and ur anger will be gone inshaAllah, another solution I put together a proffesional organization for Global consultancy for better society and you can send some money by western union and i will send u a good material and our attractive anger management innovations... holla on me if u are serious dealing with your anger and need a proffesional help... peace

[Reality Check]

When I get angry...I mean really really angry...I chant the word.. Goose-frah-bah over and over...and before you know it...I'm my cool-headed self again!

 

[iNoSeNsE]

Some ppl say am hot tempered but others ask me as in why nothing bothers me.. I’m one of those ppl that flip at the littlest thing and ignore what normal ppl usually get annoyed at.. When I get mad I tend it pick or throw whateva is near me, it could be as big as a livin room table (as long as its light) too a cup.. I also have a habit of sayin shit before it even registered in my mind…. I personally think words are more damaging to the person that ur lashing out, which I learn that the hard way… How I deal with it is by sittin down and takin in a deeeeeeep breathe ..

[Changed]

i have anger problem all right ..when i was 7 yrs old i cut my maids hand with a blade and it had to be stiched and i did all that because i came from dugsi quran and my meal was not ready on time and when i asked y she gave me an attitute :eek: and another time when i was 14 my uncle and i had to do cleaning and cooking , it was his day to clean (remember he is only 6 yrd older) and he didnt , i told him to he refused and i ofcourse started yelling cuz he been doing that for a year and i was not taking it anymore, any who to make a long story short , i hit him and he beat the living crap out of me and so i took a knife and chased him out of the house , to make matter worst , i burned his cloths since i couldnt catch up with him to make him feel the pain he made me feel, and he really did hurt me , my hand got swollen i dont know what he did to it upto this day...that is the day i decided i needed to control this temper which i did , from then on if someone annoys me i basically pretend like they dont exist i mean i stop listining and if that dont work i leave the room

 

so walk out sthl and confront the person, if they do something u dont like just tell them: i dont like it : hopefully they will understand,,,,,,,

[maajo]

i am not hot tempered person ..but there is ppl who are mad not just temper( those ppl who are annoyed with everything they face..they need docters ot somewhat psycologist)

as we human being everyday we pass through different situations, we get different expresions(anger happY) but for dusturbence ..me dont give any tolerence to it .i may say plz leave me alone or tell him/her you are disturbing .if he/she cant realize him self..i must **** his *** .if she/he is be loved one of mine or somewhatt older person..that makes me to leave the place and go somewhere else to calm my self down.

for those ppl who said i hurt someone with no big deal,,i am sure u were frustrated before that anger or there was some hocking frictions between u guys..how can u hit someone easily ..if it so u need to pray ur allah ..there is hadith i cant recall ..or u can read quran that is madness..or try to control ur self by planning some action to take when ever u see ur self getting nerves..like simply leaving the place.or go musqusha wash ur face.. take a deep breath..relax for a while and tell ur self u are wrong:)

[Baashi]

How many of you have a bad temper,dhaqsi iska xanaaqo...what triggers it and how do you deal with it...

well aniga...i have no idea what triggers it ...the reason that made me start this topic was when i got mad and hit a very close person to me with a saxan on the head...alxamdullilaah that person didnt get serious injuries...and i cant seem to find a way to deal with it....so maybe we can exchange tips..soo daaaya dee

I'm not a "camalooow" .

 

Most of us can't handle when conversation goes from casual to crucial especially when:

 

1. Opinions Vary -You know you are right and someone else thinks your wrong.

 

2. Stakes are High -You are in a meeting with 10 other nomads and you are trying to get them to see ur strategy. They have to do something different or there could be a major cost.

 

3. Emotions run Strong - You are in the middle of a casual discussion with some1 and he or she brings up an ugly incident at last night's Aroos.

 

When this happens we are often in trouble. The reason is emotions don’t exactly prepare us to converse effectively. Countless generations of genetic shaping drive humans to handle problems with flying fists and fleet feet, not intelligent persuasion and gentle attentiveness.

 

When faced these three situations typically this is what happens: "The hair stands up on the back of your neck. Two tiny organs seated neatly atop your kidneys pump adrenaline into your bloodstream. Screaming Emergency. This isn’t your choice. Your adrenal glands do it, and then you have to live with it.

 

Now your brain diverts blood from activities it deems nonessential to high-priority tasks such as fight or flight. As your muscles in the arms and legs get more blood, the higher-level reasoning sections of your brain get less. You end up facing crucial conversation with the mental power of a rhesus monkey. Your under pressure."

 

If u wanna maintain ur coolness/composure, these are some of things u can do when irritated or angered: Sit down, listen carefully and then try to put urself in other person's shoes and see the issue at hand from their prespective and where he/she is coming from.

 

Or u can avoid him/her/them, or face them and handle it poorly and even throw saxan at them...what the heck!

 

Note: I got an email while ago that talks about crucial communication. I can post it if it helps.

[raula]

In my perception, the best way to manage your anger is to confront the issues at hand, that is if it is worth your time. Otherwise, leave the nonsense alone(however, some nonesense might be senseful to someone else). Well, I used to be one of those that walks away when I notice the building up of anger/tension. Till later, I became depressed, and ended up being mad at anything that comes my way.

 

Therefore, if one avoids it, the issue is never solved. So, try to be calm and talk in a softer tone. (this is just my perception..)

[Conscious Manipulation]

close your eyes and say acudubillah mina shaitani rajeem over and over again concentrating on the words until you dont feel angry anymore.