How will you raise your children?

[Blessed]

^Aww, a new mummy. Congrats, hon.

 

True, your plans do get cloudier when you become a parent and moreso as they get older and develop their own personality and independence.

 

Our basic mission is to raise them on Tawheed and they will be right Araweelos - karate trained to boot. Everything else we will explore and learn together - Insha Allah.

[Fabregas]

If I have a daughter I will raise her to be the biggest nerd on earth. no computer games. no time for playing with friends (if they don't have glasses and can't work xy2 x xyt2.9992). Instead I'll buy her maths and science games. By the time she is 10 i want her to to get FIVE A levels. Of course, she has to be a cash cow too, and i'll send he to geeky quiz tours around the world. Newpapers will be sold the story of this amazing young girl. By the time she is 14, i expect her to started making inventions, which, no doubt, i will patent under her my name. When she is 18 I expect her to be the worlds most talented female nuclear scientist, demanded by the likes of Iran for millions of dollars. I will also be a loving father that never takes advantage of his children.

 

As for my son, ill religously take him to football practice from the age of 1.5. Man, I will exhaust every avenue and resource to make him the next Ronaldo. However, when he makes enough money and earns millions with real madrid, I will break his leg accidentally( of course on purpose), as football stardom is a fitna. He'll find another job advertising my daughters nuclear research center.

 

Finally, I will encourage them to be thoroughbred Islamic, Somalia tribesmen and women of noble cushitic and Arabian origins.

[Chocolate and Honey]

When she is 18 I expect her to be the worlds most talented female nuclear scientist, demanded by the likes of Iran for millions of dollars. I will also be a loving father that never takes advantage of his children.

 

As for my son, ill religously take him to football practice from the age of 1.5. Man, I will exhaust every avenue and resource to make him the next Ronaldo. However, when he makes enough money and earns millions with real madrid, I will break his leg accidentally( of course on purpose), as football stardom is a fitna. He'll find another job advertising my daughters nuclear research center.

[cynical lady]

heheh@Che

 

The effects of being disconnected with your community.

Malika, thanks for that reply. Most parents are unaware of the

pressures their children face at school or outside the house. If a Somali girl goes to school and all of her western friends have boyfriends and are chatting about the fun stuff they did like going to the cinema or bowling etc day in day out, how would she feel? She would feel left out right?

The old Somali parental advice; stay away from them is retarded and illogical, you can't tell a person not to interact with people they see everyday of the week.

Naturally in most cases a person will fall astray like my childhood friend

.

Are you kidding me?

[Chimera]

^Wa wawa wawawah krrsstt lololo huhuhu

[cynical lady]

No need to talk gibberish Adam

[Curly]

Teenager's job are to rebel, you allow dating certain pre-approved boys and they just want the local bad boy.

 

If any of you are interesting I can share some of my Family Links Parenting course material with you. It shines a whole new light on parenting and gives you some interesting practical tools you can use with children and even adults.

 

The course is based on four main constructs...

 

* Empathy

* Positive Discipline

* Self-awareness & Self-esteem

* Appropriate expectations

 

It's a 10 week course and focuses on the idea that you need to nature yourself as a parent in order to be able to give back to your family.

 

Having said that, I think I'll start a thread dedicated to it with all the materials from the 10 week course. I always wanted to deliver this course to our community, especially younger parents. Thanks A.Z for the idea!

[5]

With a tight leash, raising them brisk like the Spartans. AAARRGHH!!

 

On a serious note, the best thing anyone could do for their offspring is not to inflict fear in them, but to teach them to love their creator Allah swt, and know and understand their religion. That is a lot more difficult, and it's completely in the hands of Allah like everything else in this world, but just like everything else, you can pray and you can do your best by trying to be the best role model for you offspring.

 

I'm already practicing with my nieces and nephew. I like to teach them about science and history and just today my nephew asked: "How do you know everything?" after I told him what happens to the body if one does not eat (not the kiddie version but the real version). Kids are easily impressed and they actually do take in everything you tell them. You don't need to dumb them down.

[Chimera]

Cynical Girl - i'm sorry

 

Indhoos - Congrats sister!

 

Sue - Only retarded girls with big inferiority complexes go after bad boys because they believe the latter group has the capability to increase their standing amongst their peers. My daughters however will be raised the way my sisters were raised, women who are active in helping their community, women with self-respect, women with goals in life, women that know life doesn't end when your 25 but starts at that age.

 

G.G - You should browse wikipedia and copy some of those pictures of Somali Castles/ancient cities and then use one of those online poster printing websites to make posters out of them. You could give those posters to your nieces and nephews. They will have a little piece of their ancestral 'homeland' to hang on their bedroom walls and doors, trust me this will have a very positive effect on them later in life.

[The_Siren]

LOL-giving your daughters full access to the local neighbourhood Somali boys wont make them more somali-but taking them back home every year to talk with those older then themselves will help them form a sense of cultural identity.

 

I learnt more about "somaliness" talking to my grandmother and aunts and uncles then talking to kids of my own westerned influenced age.

 

Then again each to their our own. My kids? Inshaallah Shall be jetted off to Somalia every year for months on end-volunteering where neccessary-at hospitals etc (let them see the poverty and give thanks)-cleaning and learning to heat girgiraha with duxul and dashaq together some laxoox and learn the basic forms of Somali compassion, generosity- etiqette and respect for elders.

 

Simple...plus I'm thinking of making them help with the agricultural aspects and allow them to generally roam free around the buurahaa where I shall regale them with tales of their nomadic ancestry. So they grow up to be confident, intelligent and street wise well as well acedemically and practically sharp individuals. I shall raise obnoxious, cocky little brats with hearts of gold. Very complex kids-(LOL I can only hope)

 

I shall in essense give my kids the trust and freedom I was given. Which is why I'm such a boring old woman..so much freedom? Nothing to rebel against, except the world ..Or the world in which I have created.

[The_Siren]

Ps A.Z lol-You shall make very reer magaal father. Me? I'll talk to my kids, trust them, kick them and then send them scattering off on to the horizon.

 

Theres only so much a parent can do except try your best and make du'cas constantly to help them stay on a clear path. LOL

 

Peace..

[Chimera]

Siren - Haha full access?? I'm not a Pimp! These will be the type of boys my mother would call wiilo shax shax . Good head on their shoulders, very ambitious and at the same time very popular.

 

Visiting Somalia every year is also very important for their self-understanding.

[Abyan]

Raising a child is being able to balance between being strict and at times loosening up.

My mother once told me that ciyaalka are like eey liish lagu haayo( i know it's harsh but wait let me finish) Having the puppy on a very long leash, you let him walk around thinking that he is in control and markuu jar ka dhici rabo waad soo jiidi.

[5]

A.Z I think you'll change your mind as soon as you see your little daddy's girls have grown into attractive young women

I would not trust even the "shax shax" guys with 15-year-old girls. Like my cousin has warned, there is not even a wadaad guy who will not try to steal a kiss.

 

In my wildest dreams I'm home-schooling my kids, and instead of reading about the great wall of China, we're actually there visualizing the past (might prove a bit hard what with all the tourists). The only problem is I'd have to find myself a very wealthy hard-working husband to pay for all this

[Chimera]

Should i pray for ugly daughters then?

 

Allahu calam maybe i won't even have kids and be too busy in life.