Male-free Zone.

[Ibtisam]

^^^LOOOL I second Pucca father's action, my family will be like so miyaan kuu siina inanta? If he says no, it will be like haada maaxaad naga raabta sacsacyahow

 

LOOL @ LAzy do you ever forget anything!

[Faheema.]

^LoL, LayZie wax ma dhaafaan

 

Mida kale iska kay daa, been baan isu sheegayaaye. I would probably end up buying and you walking home with nothing

[Chocolate and Honey]

How did you know which number you wanted? Did the store clerk tell you in advance? Why would a customer know the numbers assigned to the DVDs?

 

Eedo Macaan, why can't you just come out and admin inaad x-rated movie iibsate, why go through a lengthy explanation that sounds half made up anyway?

 

I blame malika for opening this door. Speaking of being engaged for 3 years, whatever happened to that film producer who once chatted you up? Is he history? Did he end up becoming your fiancee? War adaaba hayso, ee war nasii.

Looooool. Little presumptious, arent we? Eedo, or Adeer, you tell them the letter and the number and sometimes they mix it. Sometimes, you want Hindi and they'll give you an old Harrison ford movie and you have to run back and they'll apologize. Not that I want to explain myself to you but since when did SOME GUY chatting you up means you're interested. RELAX. DEEP BREATH. If I wanted to watch x-rated movie, I wouldnt certainly get this upset over it :rolleyes:

[Chocolate and Honey]

after a speech like that my dad would definatly take him outside and have a little chat with him. He would then either come back and propose and marry me in a month...or i'd never hear of him again.

 

Khamees or no khamees, my head would be on a plate if i brought home that kinda sheeko.

Then we come from a very different families.

[Pucca]

^we certainly do dearest, our families are extremely different. God bless mine and yours.

[Nagwa]

lool ibti i love the word sacsacyahow

 

anywayz all the somali parents are the same

bring your date home and the next thing is naaya do you want to get marry with him so we will plan the wedding and so and so and you will be like aabo iyo hooyo i just met him weeks ago

siffican uma aqqano.

 

will never bring my date home till the day am ready mooyaane.

[Ashkiro]

^But you would think coming to your parents when your seriously considering someone is being honest with them and your including them in the process, what parent wouldn't want that? So your not ready to get married at the moment and you want to finish your degree requirements, they should understand that, maxey tahay hadah gurso ama warka xira? Tasi wa wali.

[Blessed]

What Chocolate & Honey described is a normal practice with Somali parents, though not as common these days. Wey isu doonan yihiin, she's bethroted to him. Some parents would rather their girls finished school before proceeding with the mahr, because then his her hubby and can choose to take her home whenever, etc. It's a control thing. LOL. I kid, not everyone is able to get married straight away.

 

LoL@ Malika

I really hope that's all it is.

 

Shopping? |Bah, lost my groove with that.

[Malika]

^^It will be interesting to know how long is too long in regard to being 'bethroted'? I have seen a few of these arrangements fall apart,sheydaan had his way there,and what started as a pure and uncomplicated affair turns to a challenge of its own.

 

To follow the guidelines of our deen,one has to remember that there are strict rules to being bethroted,according to custom and sharia,the fiancee is still regarded foreign to her fiance and are not allowed to be alone with her nor to accompany her in any travel without the presence of any of her unmarriageable kin like her father or brother..So if your engaged for years, do the parents truly comply with the rules of monitoring this relationship? Can those involve stay out of trouble? Hmmmm.

 

It's a trial in it self huh!

 

Blessed,I just simplified the issue,but there is an underlining issue with C&H herself. If the stories she tells us here of the men adoring her on the streets reaches the fiance, she is then perhaps have helped created the sense of insecurity within the brother.Especially if this young man is told to wait until she is ready,and then hear stories of how so and so said this, or that about how gorgeous she looks etc etc..

 

C&H, sorry for the qarxis but sis,do you tell him what you tell us? Sorry, keeping the lime light shining.

[Aaliyyah]

Khamees or no khamees, my head would be on a plate if i brought home that kinda sheeko.

lol pucca so trueee...

 

 

---------------------------

Amusnaan wa ogolaansho badhkeed.

[Blessed]

Malika,

I really can't say how long is too long, it's depends on the circumstances and the people involved. From my exposure to long engagements, it's more common within conservative families that practice arranged marriages. As for shaydaan, you're very right and I’m personally not a fan of prolonged courting as I’ve said many times before but we have to realise that one shoe doesn’t fit all.

 

Somalis also have the added pressure of big weddings and the poor brother often having to work double shifts for months just to pay for the Hilton wedding, that alone forces couples into long engagements even when the intention is to get married asap.

 

I think not telling your family that you're discussing marriage with a guy and sneaking around with him is an issue on it's own.

[SCORPION_SISTA]

Malika,

 

I have to disagree with you on your point that C&H has something to do with the underling issue...This is the gentleman's issue and no one else, most of insecurities, steam not from outside factors but your own perception of things...If I am not mistaken, this gentleman himself, had women chasing him and throwing themselves at him and he told C&H there was nothing going on and she believed him...Now he is not being fair.

 

Regardless of the stories he might have heard, he should have faith in his woman, and if there was a problem with it before he should have addressed instead of seeing a man approaching her and her trying to go back to the office and him saying the straightest line between those two points is that she is hiding a work related relationship :eek:

 

C&H,

 

Don't mind LazieG, it is always like this, when she comes out of hibernation .

 

As to the length of Engagement it really depends on the couple...Personally, if individual follow the guidelines set (as in them not being alone together), it shouldn't be longer than is necessary for the couples to prepare themselves...If it is wedding cost, or Maher, or finishing school or whatever the reason is marriage should be delayed, engagement shouldn't exceed past the completion of those objective.

 

Bee bye SS

[Chocolate and Honey]

Blessed,I just simplified the issue,but there is an underlining issue with C&H herself. If the stories she tells us here of the men adoring her on the streets reaches the fiance, she is then perhaps have helped created the sense of insecurity within the brother.Especially if this young man is told to wait until she is ready,and then hear stories of how so and so said this, or that about how gorgeous she looks etc etc..

 

C&H, sorry for the qarxis but sis,do you tell him what you tell us? Sorry, keeping the lime light shining.

Not all Malika cadeey(though I sense an accusation tone in your voice). First of all, I dont go arround saying I'm "gorgeous." If you're refering to reference I made to my looks on an old post,to be fair the question was "who's type are you"? And I said I get hit on by everyone(and its true) so lets put that to rest.

And no I dont make phone calls to him everytime some one looks my way that would be self-centerness and Allah doesnt like dadka isla weyn. That situation was and is what it is: a misunderstanding

[SCORPION_SISTA]

lol C&H has the misunderstanding been cleared out!

 

Speaking of Misunderstanding,

 

There is this show called "Say yes to the dress" and these brides to be bring their friends and relatives, to help them find the right dress...And this one commercial, this bride walks out in her gown and one of her friend says "oh it's simple and plain, just like you" :eek: :eek:

 

Now try to explain that

 

bee bye S_S

[Cara.]

LOL @ S_S. Ouch. I think she meant to say 'simple and elegant'.

 

Still, she must've gotten the ugliest braidsmaid dress for her efforts, the one with the ruffles and shoulder pads.