Faheema. Posted February 16, 2009 ^lol this combined with A&T's you might just be censored Ibti, Duck & Dive on this one...just do it please Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted February 16, 2009 ^^WHY should I?? She took 45mins of her time, the least I could do is respond. Sister SS, first can I say err thanks for making me read this, I felt like I was reading one of the promotional material the sexual wellbeing nurse leaves lying around, with their cheesy title of “get in touch with your inner self” yad yad ya. I appreciate the time you took, but I have several issues with what you posted. Firstly, I do not understand how what you described in your post relates to the start of our discussion and reactions to watching films with male friends. Remember this is how we got into this whole tirade. I am still waiting for you to somehow interlink the two and highlight where responses cross wires to say it delicately. Moving on to what you advocate for; Firstly it requires a lot of time and shaqalaan to stand in front of a mirror scrutinizing your own body, not to mention that prolonged over exposure to your own body has the risk of developing body image problems or self obsessed behavior, before you know it either you are on your way to an eating disorder or you are locked in your room for hours admiring your curves- ails waad iis caawryi. I appreciate that someone should be content with their body image and at peace with their looks, I even advocate for this, but I have a problem with the extent of ogling at your own body. My personal opinion aside, as always we have to look to Islam first and foremost in every issue, with my Islamic binoculars I can see several problems. Writing, creating and fantasies (regardless of whether they are sexual natured or not) are severely disliked and discouraged in Islam. In fact we are asked to observe fast to avoid them, along with daydreaming. Furthermore in Islam, despite the fact that we are forgiven for our evil or haram thoughts, at the same time imagining oneself committing a sin (and these things you are advocating for are impermissible for us) has different implications all together. Most scholars agree that haraam fantasies that a person deliberately calls to mind (as you are suggesting) are not covered by forgiveness which covers our normal thought process. While expanding on this Al-Nawawi said that The reason why passing thoughts are forgiven is …., that they cannot be avoided. “But it is possible to avoid dwelling on them. Hence dwelling on them is haraam”. If you frequently imagine something and wishes for it, inevitably your fantasies will develop real characters. Your fantasies will have to increase both in complexity and presentation to sustain your pleasure, after all having the same ones over and over again will get boring, upgrading these fantasies will either lead you to other paths or roads such are progressing from still photos to pornography or acting out your own created fantasies. I won’t elaborate on the obvious issue of looking at haraam images, and seriousness of your eyes become accustomed to looking at haraam things, to fulfill these fantasies, but all I want to emphasis is once you let your desire dominate you, you are heading for trouble. Lastly just a side issue that some psychologists advocate that sexual fantasies can be classed as a psychological disorder, it runs the risk of dominating someone so much so that they cannot enjoy any pleasure except through these fantasies, leading to abnormal sexual fantasies. I think I'll stop here, I've been typing for a while now, I hope you get my drift inshallah and no hard feelings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sheherazade Posted February 16, 2009 ^LoL at overexposure and requiring more and more sordid fantasies for satisfaction. The brother comment- it WAS an in-joke. Not so in for Ibts seems to be clueless. Background: Ibts used to claim she would marry AFTER her own brother does. I was not suggesting she marry him. Really. You people. Head. out. of. gutter. Although I think technically she could. But that's another in-joke. Hahaha. As for the contents of SS's post, I hope it goes some way to informing the uninformed. And dispelling some theories theory(which I hear way too often) eg. that a bride needs to be inhibited so as not to appear practised to the groom. News flash: they'd much rather the women let rip. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted February 16, 2009 ^^^Eeew Head. out. of. gutter. :eek: :eek: Even with the background, I still don't get it, I'm suppose to quiz him or his wife or something :confused: LOOL @ they'd much rather the women let rip. P.s. what are you LoL[ing] at, overexposure and requiring more and more sordid fantasies for satisfaction is very common. I assume it is like watching a film, even if it is a classic film, you cannot watch it three times in two/one months. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ms DD Posted February 16, 2009 loool sheh..rip aa! scary! Ibti The girl was trying to help you ,especially when I think you said that you were emotionally and physically frigid. Besides, i didnt think fantasies were harmful..It is what keeps some people going.. Hi Blessed..hope the kids are well Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted February 16, 2009 ^^^In Islam, I THINK has no value Some people will have to find something else to keep them going in life, for it is deemed harmful. I know she was trying to help me, and in a way she did, It forced me to do some research on the yellow lines for hala expression Pluz I was pulling her leg a bit about that comment, that's what people keep telling me Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sheherazade Posted February 16, 2009 Originally posted by *Ibtisam*: ^^^Eeew Head. out. of. gutter. :eek: :eek: Even with the background, I still don't get it, I'm suppose to quiz him or his wife or something :confused: Lord have mercy on me. It's not for HIM! It's for YOU when YOU MARRY the poor B*STARD who will have to explain every in-joke and debate the permissibility of his lust for you. LoooL, Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted February 16, 2009 Loool @ debate the permissibility of his lust for you. I checked that out already, its all good to go said the shikes Walahi I must be having a slow few days, I still don't get this damn thing. You said I thought you might benefit from the mechanics via a manual. You can familiarise yourself with it until your brother marries. I expect no feedback after What is mechanics through the manual, and why must I learn this mechanics via the manual (horta what is it?) before he marries Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faheema. Posted February 16, 2009 ^ lol@Sheh, think this one needs to be 'explained' over a cuppa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sheherazade Posted February 16, 2009 Somebody kill me. II, DD? Please. Before she does. Are you asking me what the Kama Sutra is? Google it. It's the manual to end all manuals. It's for YOU to learn from so that when the time comes(and you MARRY the poor BUGG*R who has to go through this sort of explanation) YOU will know what to expect at least, if not, dare I say it, DO. You get? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted February 16, 2009 Oh shid now I get it :eek: You are talking about the damn book!!! Oh oh i get it. that is what you are on about right? P.s. You know I have fish memory, I don't remember the threads before that, so cannot interlink the responses, had to read the last few pages again to get it! LOOL II maaxaad laa dooleh caadinasa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted February 16, 2009 ^LooooooooooL. Now, it makes sense. The kids are well@ MsDD. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ibtisam Posted February 16, 2009 OH she posted same time. Yeah thanks Sheh, for the HELP! NOT :mad: I had to go back and read everything slowly to finally get it on my own, only to realise you came out with it 1min before me!! lol Inside joke that has been killed now! LOL slow death at that. Blessed what ever happened to Burco iyo Feb?? I'm not coming either, going to India instead. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faheema. Posted February 16, 2009 LoL@Sheh, suffercation iyo badh. Ibti, you've decided already? man, wish I was that decisive Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted February 16, 2009 ^Go with her, just the convo will be an adventure. Ibts, I told you it's not happening. It isn't me this time either, so hold it!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
