lovely me Posted May 21, 2003 I loved reading the information from this debate. It exposes some interesting thoughts about how men and women think... differently. I don't think that it is a matter of changing the man that you are with. It should be how do you communicate your needs and desires. No man is perfect. We should not be trying to make them into something that we picture the perfect man to be. After coming out of a very bad marriage, I realized that you have to be willing to compromise and communicate. I am certain that there are areas in my life where I am less than what he desires in a wife, but we work on it. It comes down to respect. If you respect each other there are no hurdles that you cannot over come. I think that if you are willing to talk openly about what bothers you or what you might want your husband to change, and be willing to listen to what he might have to say about you, you might see marked changes in your relationship. I personally would not want to change my spouse. He is his own person as am I. We both bring things into our marriage that are constructive and instructive even if we do not know it. He has helped me in many areas of my life. I wouldn't change a thing. now cabish said love$me!!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BORN_BRANIAC Posted May 21, 2003 It exposes some interesting thoughts about how men and women think... differently. I don't think you can... or should change your partner. If a partner wants to change for themselves, then they will... if they want to change for their partner, they have to want to do that on their own, not because their partner is urging the change. In a relationship, I think that each partner grows and changes continuously. The key is to communicate and be open to the growth and change... and be ready to accept that you might not always agree... and that partners don't have to agree on everything. They just have to be willing to respect differences and find common "new" ground as they BOTH grow and change. This is what makes a relationship exciting every day! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NASSRA Posted May 22, 2003 NICE QUESTION??? WELL..SOMETIMES IS TURE AM NOT GONNA DENY....WE TRY TO CHANGE THEM BUT IN GOOD WAY...NOT BAD..BUT MOST I THINK GUYS TRY TO CHANGE GURLS..I MEAN U GONNA SEE A LOT WOMEN TRIED THINKS WITH MEN THAT THEY NEVER THOUGHT THEY WOULD DO...U KNOW BUT WOMEN WE LIKE WHAT BEST 4 THEM....LIKE JUST TURNING THEM TO BETTER MAN???? I GOTTA BOUNCE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Senora Posted May 23, 2003 Its often stereotypical to hear stories about "women who change men", b/c as we all know it can go both ways, whether intentional or not. And for anyone to say that women do it more is just crude... Some change is for the better, and those are the intentions of many people...No one is perfect, so on that note, you should expect your 'mate' to carry along "flaws".Whether it be few, or in your unfortunate situation many, sometimes the idea of trying to change at LEAST on of those flaws is worth a shot. Its a strategy to try and let your mate kick one of those bad habits aside, OR if your one of those ppl that has that "dictating" side of yours, your using this strategy to hopefully place your "mate" on that road to perfection....So this answer can go either way.....whether its to ask "why do men try to change women", OR, vice-versa Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
finestsista2005 Posted May 23, 2003 Sis, when i want to change a brother is when i think it's good for him to get his lazy ass up and face the world. I think most girls think it's good to help the brother better himself and change him. When the trueth problems between two are created that way. I relized if the man wanted to help himself he could....let him be lazy bumb if he wants to .....i'll give him advice sure....give him help if he needs too...but hellllllllllllo no would i ever try to change him so he will be as good as denzel washigton...lol...beside....other girlz would be taking him right....lol. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rokko Posted May 23, 2003 Myth: Women want to control men. Truth: Women want to contribute, improve and be included. Women just want to control men until we follow them around like little puppy dogs. Women can't just leave a situation alone -- they have to pick at it until we do what they want us to do." Women always have to have things their way, or they get upset. Women want to make men into wimps. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Blessed Posted May 23, 2003 ^^ lol I see where your going with this mate. Good luck I am gonna sit here and watch the sisters shred you to pieces Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
