QUANTUM LEAP Posted March 29, 2005 Customer Service Rep: Can you install LOVE? Customer: I can do that. I'm not very technical, but I think I am ready to install now. What do I do first? CS Rep: The first step is to open your HEART. Have you located your HEART ma'am? Customer: Yes I have, but there are several programs running right now. Is it okay to install while they are running? CS Rep: What programs are running ma'am? Customer: Let me see....I have PASTHURT.EXE, LOWESTEEM.EXE, GRUDGE.EXE, and RESENTMENT.COM running right now. CS Rep: No problem. LOVE will automatically erase PASTHURT.EXE from your current operating system. It may remain in your permanent memory, but it will no longer disrupt other programs. LOVE will eventually overwrite LOWESTEEM.EXE with a module of its own called HIGHESTEEM.EXE. However, you have to completely turn off GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM. Those programs prevent LOVE from being properly installed. Can you turn those off ma'am? Customer: I don't know how to turn them off. Can you tell me how? CS Rep: My pleasure. Go to your Start menu and invoke FORGIVENESS.EXE. Do this as many times as necessary until GRUDGE.EXE and RESENTMENT.COM have been completely erased. Customer: Okay, I'm done. LOVE has started installing itself automatically. Is that normal? CS Rep: Yes it is. You should receive a message that says it will reinstall for the life of your HEART. Do you see that message? Customer: Yes I do. Is it completely installed? CS Rep: Yes, but remember that you have only the base program. You need to begin connecting to other HEARTS in order to get the upgrades. Customer: Oops...I have an error message already. What should I do? CS Rep: What does the message say? Customer: It says "ERROR 412 - PROGRAM NOT RUN ON INTERNAL COMPONENTS." What does that mean? CS Rep: Don't worry ma'am, that's a common problem. It means that the LOVE program is set up to run on external HEARTS but has not yet been run on your HEART. It is one of those complicated programming things, but In non-technical terms it means you have to "LOVE" your own machine before it can "LOVE" others. Customer: So what should I do? CS Rep: Can you find the directory called "SELF-ACCEPTANCE"? Customer: Yes, I have it. CS Rep: Excellent, you are getting good at this. Customer: Thank you. CS Rep: You're welcome. Click on the following files and then copy them to the "MYHEART" directory: FORGIVESELF.DOC, SELFESTEEM.TXT, REALIZEWORTH.TXT, and GOODNESS.DOC. The system will overwrite any conflicting files and begin patching any faulty programming. Also, you need to delete SELFCRITIC.EXE from all directories, and then empty your recycle bin afterwards to make sure it is completely gone and never comes back. Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up with really neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves all over my HEART! CS Rep: Then LOVE is installed and running. You should be able to handle it from here. LOVE is freeware. Be sure to give it and its various modules to everybody you meet. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shyhem Posted March 29, 2005 Q Leap Customer: Got it. Hey! My HEART is filling up with really neat files. SMILE.MPG is playing on my monitor right now and it shows that WARMTH.COM, PEACE.EXE, and CONTENTMENT.COM are copying themselves all over my HEART! LooOOL very funny.If only some of us could be programmed that easily. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Salma Posted March 29, 2005 "NO HEART is FOUND" lol Interesting, now that was for the heart what about da BRAIN?! Merci that was funny & inspiring. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Passion_4_Fashion Posted March 29, 2005 thnx QL enjoyed reading that Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Valenteenah. Posted March 29, 2005 QL, Ever so romantic. I feel like sending you a virus. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Juxa Posted March 29, 2005 looooooooooooool@QL waa u malaynayay inaad tan soo wado. so this was why u locked yrself, what an invention. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Pujah Posted March 30, 2005 I wish it was that easy to program your heart......it works mysteriously and does its own things not working with your head Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SJ Posted March 30, 2005 ^^^^It is: Just acquire the right buddle of programs and keep adjusting to changing conditions. You could even do the upgrading online via online datn services. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emerald Posted March 30, 2005 Phantasmagoria... i don't think that virus will go amiss . QL, > well worth the read Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Waranle_Warrior Posted March 30, 2005 Amazing Software on the Market that is..FANTASTIC, Where can I buy it bro? Is it compatible with Windows Females or Males too...Coz ladiez will also want to gain hearts..lol.. IM sure Bill Gates will pay you for coming up with this.. Good job Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
QUANTUM LEAP Posted March 30, 2005 Glad you all liked the program and now I will roll it out to anyone who wishes to install it. Every program has differences. The main difference between successful hearts and unsuccessful hearts is that successful ones have learned how to troubleshoot and resolve any errors. And no virus would be a match for the love bug as it has grand well programmed defence mechanisms. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites