Long distance relationship

[Nephissa]

Who comes to Europe and still loves his long left behind dusty-feet girlfriend in Africa? Not anyone I know! . Misana mayska hubtaa you're not wasting good years of your life on something that isn't even for love?

I was once offered $15k by a relative to sponsor a geeljire for a sham marriage. Of course I had to turn it down at the time. Had it been $40k I'd maybe consider it, but $15k? What am I? L0L.

 

Joking aside, Skipperoow welcome to SOL.

 

re: the topic, sabar yeelo, don't settle with someone else just because they're geographically convenient. Gabadha keenso, it can be very well worth it.

[-Serenity-]

My only advice to you skipper, would be to be realistic. How long is this going to be long distance? 6 months? a year? a year and half? All tolerable if you're both strong and truly love each other.

 

However, if you have no timelines and no idea how to bridge the distance, let it go. You dont want to spend 2-5yrs waiting only to realize it wont work or you guys have grown so far apart that it wasnt worth the wait.

[Skipper]

Nephthys so you are one of those who believe that every person in Africa is poor and are dusty feeted huh? I can tell you have been watching too much CNN coverage. Why doont you visit Africa for a change and i am sure you will be blown away by it´s beauty and the good life people are living in, even those with modarate income. Back to the subject. Serenity i know from talking to her on several occassion and staying in contact through text message that we have the same mind set even though we have been away from each other for 7 years. There is something inside me that is saying "Dont give up this girl, because if you do give up you will live to regret for the rest of your life" We agreed to meet up in december and we will discuss what we should do from there.

[Skipper]

Nephthys and everyone else i appreacite your advise. Who else is dating someone who is far away other than me?

[Faheema.]

Originally posted by Skipper:

even though we have been away from each other for

7 years.

:eek: You're one patient individual. Good luck walaal and hope it ends well.

[chubacka]

Its a good idea to meet up in Decembe inshallah, why don't you get married and cement the relationship.

[Azmaya]

Okey. You guys have been apart for seven long years, she is in Kenya, your all the way in Norway. Seven long years with a guy and only text messaging and what not, no visits from him until this december 7 years later, no proposal or marriage, and no ticket out, that would be my clue he doesn’t love me, and to move on. Hello, excuse me beenlow, i don't buy your story.

 

ta ta

[rudy-Diiriye]

azmaya, did u ever get any proposals so far? just wondering...!

[Valenteenah.]

Long-distance relationships are a NIGHTMARE. Every single day that you are away from your loved one is such a waste...of your time, your love and your life.

 

Unfortunately many Somali couples are trapped into this sort of relationship, most probably because we are scattered all over the world.

 

If it's in your hands to do something about it, then you ought to.

 

I wish you all the best, dear.

[-Serenity-]

I sure hope the 7 was a typo. Or perhaps they fell in love at 15. Then its sweet too.

 

Otherwise... 7yrs of your youth is truly a lifetime. A lifetime spent in waiting. And that is not good Skipper buddy.

 

Whats keeping you apart anyway?

[Haneefah]

I think those relationships that form under long-distance can be quite a hassle, even very gruesome and distressing at times for the indivuals involved. I've witnessed it all too well with a close friend of mine, and subhanallah, it nearly drove her insane. All the ifs, buts, and uncertainty involved can literally drain one's energy out and turn out to be quite unhealthy for you.

 

But your case is different in that you've spent time together to get to know each other, to fall in love and make a commitment, so Insha'Allah be steadfast and do everything in your capacity to try and bring her. Then Marry her ASAP!

 

I pray that Allah makes it easy for you.

[SJ]

Skipper, you have a other alternatives to pursue while sticking with your lady now that you have wasted great deal of time. Why don't you demote her say, to wife number 2 and establish yourself second base in Africa? I'm sure she'll welcome your generous offer.

[Ibtisam]

^^^ :rolleyes: If she is so good he waited 7years why would he do a silly thing like that, and why is she being demoted it is not like it is her fault.

 

Skipper: erm 7years is a long time, anything can happen then, I cannot imagine still like the footballer I thought was the best in the whole school at 15!! In fact I don't even remember his name! Personalities change over time, so do looks, attitudes (at 15 neither of you could not possible know what you wanted out of life!) In those 7 long years you have probable created an image of what you want her to be or what you think she is rather than what she really is. December might be a shocker for you, but if after you still find the same feelings etc then you need to do something about it and make it happen. Don't just sit around thinking it is going to work out, you have to put some work into it inshallah. She is not going to wait for you forever you know, if she is so good, she is probably over whelmed with offers and will find it harder to justify to herself and her family this whole 7year thing.

 

Furthermore Kenya is not that far or expensive to visit from the UK, and you can speak to someone for 3hrs 15min on a £5 phone card. Save up all that money you would be using to take her out (for about four months) if she was her (which would work out to at least £150 a month) and go and see her 2/ 3times a year.

 

Good luck and pray Salatul Istikhara, seek comfort, guidance and help from Allah in what is best for you in this matter, rather than just following your heart which could lead you astray in so many ways.

[Jacaylbaro]

I used to like the long distance relationship ,,, nothing can beat the feeling of missing someone who is far from you.

[umu zakaria]

guys dont discarriage the brother i was in a long distance relationship nearly as much as he n we ended up 2gather with a child now, c on

 

Skipper follow ur heart, is she worth the wait n hey get off ur but n propose otherwise, she wont hang on anylonger!

 

i beleive in a genuine long. dis. relationship