Khayr Posted June 22, 2003 Salaamz, THIS QUESTION IS ONLY FOR THE MALE NOMADS IN HERE. If you just got married to a sistah that you did not know too well and on your wedding night, what would you expect her to be? Would you expect her to be a VIRGIN? How would you deal with the shock that she isn't a virgin? It would be interesting to here from someone that has experienced this. For me personally, I would have a difficult time to adjust to it. Choosing to marry a sistah and finding out that I am not the first one. Subhanallah!!! Do you think that it would be appropriate to ask HER during the negotation process (Privately ofcourse)!? I would like the fellas to reply to this and not the sistahs. Its a request inshallah and hopefully you can respect that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dhimbil Posted June 22, 2003 khayr I hvn't had this expereince, as am not married yet, but i will give your questions a shot. If you just got married to a sistah that you did not know too well and on your wedding night, what would you expect her to be? Would you expect her to be a VIRGIN? I wouldn't expect anything. Since i don't know her that much. But if she was virgin, than thats acing on the cake. Because if we made it to the bed, than she must have met all my requirements for a good wife and i hope i met her conditions as well, so being a virgin or not would not be an issue by that time. How would you deal with the shock that she isn't a virgin? Personally it depends on the situation. If the girl lied about being virgin and i found out she is not, i would be dissapointed. But if the subject was never discussed and i found out she is not virgin, than so be it. I don't see the big deal. Do you think that it would be appropriate to ask HER during the negotation process (Privately ofcourse)!? If it is as important to you as it sounds. I would definitely advise you to ask and found out before you commit to marriage. However for me, I wouldn't ask a female if she is a virgin or not. Anything i need to know to decide can be observed by spending time with the girl, like dabeecad,adaab, qurux, family values, credentials et. Let's assume a female made a mistake years ago and commited a sin. Don't you think its better to let god punish her for her sins? am sure you wouldn't want pple punishing you for something you did long time ago and probable repented for it already. Also, if your wife is a virgin tonight she won't be a virgin by the time your done with her, so from now on she would be nonvirgin, how are you going to deal with that? or you just want to be able to say i screwed a virgin one time in my life is one night that important your willing to forgo a decent female? Adios Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
