Valenteenah. Posted November 24, 2004 ^Kaalay, you're pretty eloquent when you want to be, ma istidhi? :eek: Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RendezVous Posted November 24, 2004 Asalam aleykum all, I have read all your comments for close to an hour and found a lot of points for discussion. First of all, let me give my regards to all who contributed..although am not the one who started it all The ladies have got more points to debate than the boys.Infact it was disastrous the way they responded to the generalization issue..how do u say...they do this they do that...it won't apply and guyz will just kill u. it was wrong in the first place to debate such a topic in a women arena...this is the women..listed under SOL women...take the WESTERN ladies to a general room and if you wanna FIX them...do it there. and to the ladies...please assume that there are GOOD men and GOOD women...infact it was said in the HOLY QURAAAAAAAAAAAN.... From 009.67 Repentance(Tauba): 'The hypocritical men and the hypocritical women are all alike; they enjoin evil and forbid good and withhold their hands; they have forsaken Allah, so He has forsaken them; surely the hypocrites are the transgressors'. and also ALLAH...says Suratul Nuur...chapter024.26 TheLight 'Bad women are for bad men and bad men are for bad women. Good women are for good men and good men are for good women..' For Those who abuse 'PIOUS' and all muslim ladies for any wrong doings...THE HOLY QURAAN SAYS TO YOU IN THE SAME SURATUL NUUR BUT VERSE 26 'Surely those who accuse chaste believing women, unaware (of the evil), are cursed in this world and the hereafter, and they shall have a grievous chastisement'. The Debate is not about COMPETITION...there is nobody competing with another...if you are not secure...or are not a responsible man or woman rather, then you don't exhibit good PATNERSHIP. All people men and women need to have relationships..you guyz must be good partners.You must have SABAR on each other. I think the link i got for you would do better explanation...I posted it loooooong time ago http://www.jannah.org/sisters/wifehappy.html Ibraheeeeem's Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Caveman Posted November 24, 2004 Garab Tuujiye ^^Sxb I am learning the SOL community, and thnx for the help laakiin you left one person…adiga.. Legend of Zu, After reading your point-by-point counter-argument I appreciate your insight, but as you can see from my original piece I haven’t stated argument/reasoning for this “trendâ€, I merely asked why more and more people opted for this idea. Nor have I reached any conclusion supporting any particular view. Perhaps the missing piece to ask my question was not presenting polls and data, and then I’ll be more qualified to use the term “trendâ€. Nevertheless, I am glad I didn’t call it “influx†of young, educated brothers heading abroad for wives, but appreciate your reply. The Rendezvous Thanks for sharing that..my Allah(sw) reward you..Aamin! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Seeking Paradise Posted November 24, 2004 Who cares? :rolleyes: You would expect the women to be complaining if this was the "trend" but it seems that almost all the time the subject comes up...its a brother trying to unsuccessfuly rub our noses on something we dont give a shyte about! Fine go ahead ...but dont be checking our reactions ever so often as if we even noticed. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Legend of Zu Posted November 24, 2004 Originally posted by Bee: ^Kaalay, you're pretty eloquent when you want to be, ma istidhi? :eek: Do u think so??? :eek: really??? :eek: :eek: To conclude I will close this statement with what my three year old niece says when she is amazed " Allah My God" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lol Posted November 24, 2004 I am as usual late to respond to topics that interest me, since I don't have much of time these days. I am not sure if my sisters touched up on this point I want to convey but this is my take on the situation. Reasons men look for wives abroad Lack of self confidence Somali men over the years have lost the confidence in themselves, this in turn caused them to view any woman with education as a threat. Inability to live upto women's expectations Todays women have totally different expectations than the generations that preceeded them. And this is because of their advancement in education and independence. Educated sisters demand respect from their men, and stand tall next to their men. Since Somali men haven't matured with their women over time, the demands posted by their women have become objects of conflict. Difficulty in adaptation to wetern culture Women have become the bread-winners in their families and have succeeded in becoming self-sufficient. We(Women) have learned to depend on ourself than any other human being. And I believe this is wat causes conflict between married couples, for the somali man is used to a woman who depends on him 100%. These are just few of the major reasons I can think of that pushes weaklinks in the somali men population to seek life-partners from abroad. I believe real men, who are aware of their manliness aren't affraid of the challenges put forth by women rather they love to have the competition ( although I differ to call it as such). Competition amongst humans be it between two males or a man and his wife, can only produce better fruits. So in my opinion, a real man will always look for a woman that can complete him by possessing qualities he lacks. What good is a wife if she can't help in making her husband a better person??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Tuujiye Posted November 24, 2004 Lack of self confidence Somali men over the years have lost the confidence in themselves, this in turn caused them to view any woman with education as a threat. Maama HIBO wlc baaaaaaaaaack...lol.. I haven't forgoten you yet..lol.. anyways hate to disagree with you for the first time but the above quote should begin with "some men"..lol..because you know we aint all the same. wlc back Try-Me..we missed you here in SOL wareer badanaa!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dhagax-Tuur Posted November 24, 2004 Asalaama allaikum all. I've read almost all of the posts and I am speechles. Everything that one would say has been said. But can I say this: IT IS TOUGH BEING A SOMALI/MUSLIM MAN IN HOLLYWOOD ERA, IN THE WEST. This affects every bit of our lives, not least of our sisters (our potential wives/mothers of our kids). I see war, a counter-war that is waajib on us (somali men) to secure our women back from West and its evil temptations. If we all go and get wives from elsewhere, we've neglected our responsibilities. These too are our responsibility. Let's not give up on them. Let's put our lives on the line and take what is ours. On a serious note, I suggest guur waa calaf, and there is nothing one can do to change that course, so don't lose your energy on that. I also say this, girls in the west are not all the same, some are good some are bad, but before you just hazard on the idea of a guur to a girl, think, what can you offer for this girl, lifewise. As a person, do a trial balance on yourself, does your credit balance your debt? I think, we've nothing to be afraid of. A good muslim, and I mean a good muslim has nothing whatsoever to worry about when it comes to challenges posed by the life in the west. Cos, muslim is always a winner! And that is true, wallaahi. P.S. I apologise if I messed the wonderful ideas and discussions of those before me. There are potential people leaders in this place. I take off my hat for them. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rokko Posted November 24, 2004 Wlc back Try-Me. Is it the Mushakal..or u just forgot about us..lol long time. I also have to disagree u cuz not are we all the same. I'm not sure some of us would see an educated woman as a threat except a reward and would be feeling lucky na’mean. Then you have to ask the question what’s considered as an education cuz anyone with a paper doesn’t qualify as educated. Education comes in many different flavors in this life and after so partner with only on one flavor becomes a threat namean. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gediid Posted November 25, 2004 Reasons men look for wives abroad Lack of self confidence Somali men over the years have lost the confidence in themselves, this in turn caused them to view any woman with education as a threat. Try Me Somali women are relatively new to the educated and enlightened world,with no mentors to emulate ,they have misunderstood the whole concept of "I'm educated" which in reality is all about better jobs,better living and generally a more educated outlook of life, and not the madax xanuun/confused type of character which most younger educated women display...... Markaas Somali women with education are a threat only to themselves and no one else...... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sheherazade Posted November 25, 2004 Hahaha. So much to laugh at on SOL lately. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RendezVous Posted November 25, 2004 Asalam aleykum all, am back with some more...GIZZY WIZZY...complications http://www.jannah.org/sisters/wifehappy.html I think the best way is to live the First goat..anon..to describe to us what he exactly wants us to discuss...some men are feeling uneasy here..while the ladies are really fighting...over nothing... I said and I say there is NO COMPETITION..NO MADAX XANUUN..NO WAREER..NO FEELING UNEASY...but to my dismay..I saw a lot of dem guyz who DIVORCE a pretty mali wife for just feeling UNEASY about her..why for just saying am not feeling happy about you...we SEE a lot of us(MEN)respecting our partners and sincerely loving THEM to an extent some SISTERS assumes you are IGNORANT and macna laan... When a woman starts seeing that you are macna laan...then you start feeling uneasy..did u ask yourself why she thinks so... Examine what you gave for free..what goes beneath yourselves...is there a potential threat TO your love..when you give someone some freedom..you tend to be free..and everybody was born alone without a partner..so give freedom. check the degree of freedom..tend to think how you can improve your love..LOVE is love and remains love so long as you love each other.. FACT I saw a lot of women from Scandinavian countries(SWEDEN/NORWAY/DENMARK/FINLAND)flocking..en masse to Dubai+AbuDhabi for men less their age...I think it ain't a bad idea afterall..I think they realised there offsprings will go to extinction when they don't reproduce or when they go with a jamaican...@45yrs REAL WARNING.. most jamaican freinds don't have a religion and are extremely poorer both in mutual knowledge and wealth..and you are posing your offspring..to extinction...they will leave and DUMP you immediately after.. Respect each other and peace and am out...we love our 'MOTHERS OF OUR KIDS'. Ibraheem's Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rudy-Diiriye Posted November 25, 2004 there we go again talking with half hearts! i can just feel the paranio in this thread on both sides! just do it, it aint all that hard! have some heart aye! what do u gotta lose!! u already lost so much!! Allah yo no naxariiso! Amen. ppl make this like mt everest! its not! just find some one u can trust, give like a yr or 6 months and if u get a chill...what heck is stopping u! nothing or something! u take your choice! listen get that monkey off your back...and make the move! if u dont, nothing is gonna happen!! have lil trust and iman and go from there! dont listen to losers or nervious ppl. . u got one life to love....so live it..! leave the rest to Allah! he will guide thru if u trust in him!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RendezVous Posted November 25, 2004 First read this... http://www.jannah.org/sisters/wifehappy.html and if need be... http://www.unwind.com/jokes-funnies/sexjokes/womenfail.shtml Then give Your Sis who happens to be your wife...or rather the 'MOTHER OF YOUR KIDS' some freedom..she will obviously feel u.Show her that you also need some freedom..and can move BOLITICALLY...notwithstanding with or without causing a lot of problems to you.you need to give WOMEN a lot of kindness.... HADEETH The Prophet Muhammad may Allah's peace and blessings be upon him: Your Heaven lies under the feet of your mother (Ahmad, Nasai). ... RESPECT IS TWO WAYS...I understand there are many ways to kill ISLAM..and one way..is through WOMEN... ..creating problems between men and women of ISLAM...AYAAN is doing her best now... and still there are very good sisters in the WEST... Few sisters understand THE WAR AGAINST ISLAM..the hijaaaaabeee, the adultery story, abortion and so on..Sisters say they are modernizing...who wants *****O..*****es and divorcees..whores... THE QURAAN SAYS: suratul baqara...verse 120 'And the Jews will not be pleased with you, nor the Christians until you follow their religion. Say: Surely Allah's guidance, that is the (true) guidance. And if you follow their desires after the knowledge that has come to you, you shall have no guardian from Allah, nor any helper'. like them...they want you the same...BEWARE... Ibraheem's Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sheherazade Posted November 25, 2004 Rudy, move over; Rendezvous is the new you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
