Gather round boys and girls

[NGONGE]

"The battle of the Zanussi 500"

 

 

Last night, I woke up feeling very thirsty. I went to the kitchen and opened the fridge to have a drink. The kitchen was dark but when I opened the fridge door, the whole place lit up. I was about to pick the drink up when I noticed all sorts of hullabaloo in the fridge! Nothing was where it was supposed to be! The eggs were crowded in one corner, the onions were lined up opposite the tomatoes and the cucumber was backing up the onions! The ketchup bottle was standing to the side and looking down at all of this. I don’t know how I did it, man. But, I found myself talking to the bottle of coke and asking it what’s going on! It replied, “ The onions and the tomatoes are fighting, man”. I asked her why are they fighting and she told me they fought because a female tomato was walking past a young onion when the latter tried to chat the former up. The tomato told the onion he would be the last vegetable in the world she’d consider talking to. The onion persisted with his chat up lines when the tomato finally uttered the words that no living creature would dare say to an onion’s face. She told him that he stinks! All the onions that were loitering in the background got offended and surrounded the tomato and started roughing her up. The rest of the tomatoes gathered up and tried to help their fellow tomato. A big fight ensued. The melon tried to stop the fighting sides when the cucumber started shouting, “ butt out, fatty”. So, the melon tried to crush the cucumber, man. But, the cucumber was not alone; it had other cucumbers to back her up. The melon was surrounded and was getting punched from all sides by angry cucumbers. The eggs begged the lettuce to stand in front of them and shield them for all the fighting. The ketchup bottle was taunting the tomatoes and calling them “unrefined thugs”. The grapes blamed the tomato for all of this. They said she only insulted the poor onion because she was angry at the orange. Apparently, she tried to chat up the orange and he told her he only has eyes for the sweet bananas. The grapes claimed that the tomato was as sour as they were, man.

I thanked the bottle of coke for the explanation and then picked her up and drank her. I told the rest of the fruits and vegetables in the fridge “ see what I did to the whistleblower? Now if you don’t behave, I’m going to chop you all up and eat you”. I closed the fridge and went back to bed.

When I woke up in the morning I wasn’t sure if what happened the night before was a dream!

 

 

I hate it when people tell me stories that I end up having them in my dreams.

[NGONGE]

What’s the matter, darling? Can’t you read? :rolleyes:

 

I personally thought this story would be right up your street, sweetie

[Warrior of Light]

Lol Ngonge, I have a feeling you were dreaming.

 

The interesting part is a female tomato had to start the trouble, so my question is are you having a problem with the female gender???

As thoughts, unresolved issues supressed in your subconscious emerge as dreams.

 

Or is it a result of a recent problemo with mamsahib???

[Warrior of Light]

OOPPS forgot to add liked the way u took care of the whistleblower - an authoratative move to keep others in order.

[NGONGE]

That’s how I felt all of last week!

 

Today though, I’ve got work to do. Not much, just a bit. I’ll be done soon and then we can sit by the cyber fire and sing a Sahra Axmed song if you like. :cool:

[NGONGE]

What is Native Deen? Or rather who is Native Deen?

[Warrior of Light]

Ngonge where did the native deen idea spring from????

[NGONGE]

This lunatic (meant in the nicest possible sense) was talking about singing a native deen song, SS. I have no idea what that means, so I asked her to explain.

 

I believe Sahra Axmed to be some famous Somali singer, passing through. Don’t know any of her songs though. Maybe you can help me (highly doubt it).

[Blessed]

Native Deen is an 'American' Islamic hip hop group - my signature shows sme of the lyric's of one of their songs... Passing through- I hope you ain't tryna hate on em...

 

 

Sahra Ahmed is cool too

[Blessed]

I like you now that we've got something in common

 

<-- feels jealouse - I so wanted to go to that concert, but I went up North for that weekend... but tell, tell. I want hear every last detail

was Ahmed, Ahmed there too?

 

 

 

Don't worry about them being married- them wadaads are allowed 4 . maybe U should consider sharing

I think you can order their recors from their website - mountainoflight.com

[Intuition]

Asalaamu'Calaykum,

 

NGONGE I absolutely loved your story. But hey, why are your onions in the fridge to begin with :confused: . Over all very entertaining .

Passing_Thru what seems to be the matter? I mean are you trying to ruin a perfectly nice posting with your really annoying whining? You and Gedo should go and settle your differences outside. It's very childish and seems to be spoiling the mood :rolleyes:

 

Wasalaam.

[Jumatatu]

Kudos to NGONGE for the good creatice writing. However my friend the scenario you are trying to depict so hypothetically has currently many whistle blowers and the fracas has extended beyond the collective family in the fridge.

Never the less mate, have to say it is a nice piece of analogy. Dare I imagine what your writing will be had you to choose charecters in a sewerage.

[Intuition]

Passing_thru... :rolleyes:

 

Jumatatu- Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles maybe?

[NGONGE]

I’m glad you guys liked the story. It’s not mine by the way. It was a comment a friend made about his fridge a while back. I just ended dreaming about it. That’s all.

Sewers you say? Oh, that’s one place full of all sorts; Mice, cockroaches, frogs and lots and lots of lovely writhing worms. :rolleyes:

[AYOUB]

Originally posted by NGONGE:

Now if you don’t behave, I’m going to chop you all up and eat you”. I closed the fridge and went back to bed.

I demand you withdraw this threat or else I'll be forced to pass your case to Vegetable Rights campaigners GREENPEAS.