The semi-finalist Mother-in-law

[Abtigiis]

The semi-finalist Mother-in-law

 

Something was ominous about the ringing of the phone. The last thing I wanted was for Mooge to remind me how long he has been waiting for the money. I mean, honestly, how can he turn my world into a living hell just because I borrowed a satellite dish from his ‘wada-dhalasho’ Electronics Shop? Three times it rang and I didn’t pick it.

 

She stormed angrily from the bedroom, and asked me to pick it up. When Sucaad, my wife gets upset, I behave.

 

‘Hello. Yes, speaking.’ I said with melancholy. The voice of the caller on the other end made me exhale a heavy sigh of relief. It wasn’t Mooge.

‘This is a telephone center. Someone needs to speak to you. Please talk to her.’ The man said and I could hear the clutter of handles and wires pushed around, before a familiar voice said “Hallaw! Ma Guuleed’baa?”

 

No!No! Not tonight. I knew what was coming. It was Habo Dahabo, who as I suspected told me my mother-in-law has just fainted and I need to rush to their house. “Come fast. All others are here. It is only you who is missing.” She said, before adding “oo tii miyayna kuu sheegin?”. She was referring to Sucaad. There is no love lost between the two and I am aware of the degree of animosity Habo has to my wife. Sucaad also hates her. I disregarded her query.

 

After the exchanges ended, I pondered over my options. Shall I tell my wife that her mom is sick and we need to go? Shall I delay the announcement until the big match ends, and pretend I misunderstood the message? So many thoughts, so little time. In the end, my quandary was ‘resolved’ when her brother called Sucaad and broke the news to her.

 

She knew that was the message I got moments ago, judging from the pensive look at me. At about the same time, Asad called.

 

“Robino or Messi? Who will score tonight?” He asked without bothering to pass through the formalities of greetings. “Get ready; I am coming to pick you.”

 

I didn’t want to seem to be so careless about my wife’s families, but I was desperate to watch the big game between Brazil and Argentina. “There is no way I am gonna miss this Derby of the Derbies”, I vowed earlier the day, as the giants clash for the Copa-America. I have to join Asad and all other fans for the entire thriller; the electrifying atmosphere has become something of an addiction to me.

 

And as if the boiling of her blood just at the kick off of the European Champions Semi-final before two years was not an ill-timed coincidence, she gets sick at this one again? And in Japan/South Korea, was it not because of her getting sick that I missed the controversial Italy/South Korea cracker?

 

“I am not going to let her inopportune, if not deliberate, fainting and panting ruin my passion.” I decided firmly. What a casino is for a gambler, football is for me. I love it.

 

‘Torres is better than both’ I replied after repeated insistence. I had a reason not to mention the offered alternative names. Sucaad heard Robinho and Messi before, and she would have realised I am talking about football players at a time of immense distress to her family- and by extension my family.

 

My uncle, who recently came from the country-side, and was gazing at the TV with wide eyes; often insisting “gabadhii shalay luntay ma la helay tolow?” (Referring to a Mexican series which was running for a while, where a young lady was missing) picked the name and in a way saved me.

 

“My cow is named Torrays,’ He said with a chuckle, obviously understanding I am talking about a person and not an animal here. ‘You people in the towns are ridiculous. I saw someone calling the other Kildhi the other day,” he shook his head in disgust.

 

My uncle’s intervention distracted Sucaad. But Asad’s honking at the gate woke her up. “Muxuu doonayaa kana. Go tell him to leave us alone. And call a taxi for us to depart”, she ordered. She doesn’t like Asad, who six months ago married a second wife. I know the source of her detest, but she says it is because he takes me out for ‘childish hobbies’. Footabll is the main one.

 

When I told Asad it will be difficult for me to join him because my mother-in-law is in coma; he was unapologetic in his sneering and displeasure. “This Semi-final Mother-in-law is a tournament herself. Maybe we should bet she will win or lose this one? When will her final be?”

 

I didn’t really was upset about his profane remarks; but I pretended I was. “War isla yaab dee, I said” but asked him to come up with a scheme that could enable me to go and see the old women and then quickly proceed to the Sportcenter, where Halgan was ready to put 10 USD against a loss for Argentina.

 

The piercing scream of Sucaad ended our little conspiracy. "Shall I walk or you are calling a taxi?” she said angrily. It is one of these times she never controls her anger, even in front of other people. Matters that involve her family are always contentious. I told her that Asad can drop us.

 

When we reached the old mud house where her mother leaves, Qamar, her younger sister was sobbing. She said Hooyo Tiriig has been out of breath for over thirty minutes.

 

In my mind, I was in the Sportcenter where the game must have started in the last five minutes. I imagined the graceful entry into the stadium of my team, Brazil. More than the football, sometimes I enjoy the walk out of the rest rooms and all the posturing before the national anthem is played. It reminds me of when you bring your darling to the room, and before the real matter starts, you run around to bring beverages; all along thinking about what lies ahead.

 

My phone blipped and there was a Text message from Asad. [brazil 1-Argentina 0 Julio Baptista (the Beast) scored in the 4th minute). My face brightened and all the tension was relieved. Sucaad noticed this and spoke in my ears. “ Ilaahayoow Islaantan Iga dil baad is lee dahay soo ma’aha” She murmured.

 

Hooyo Tiriig opened her eyes and did a small prayer thanking the Almighty for giving her health back. She saw me and said, “All of you, I thank you for coming. I am really feeling better. I don’t think you need to worry. If it doesn’t kill me in the first half-an-hour, my pressure usually gets better. You can leave; it is late.”

 

I giggled with enormous gratification and leaped forward to greet my mother-in-law and wish her good luck.

 

She caught my hand and said “You, You will stay with me in case I need to see a doctor later in the night. Let Sucaad go home for the children.”

 

I wished this was her final game.

[MZanzi]

Brilliant Story...

[Ibtisam]

What an evil man lol

[nuune]

lool classic stuff Mr AT&T, can you finish the rest of the story, meel xaraarto leh unbaad uga tagtaa markii lagu arko un lol

[Abtigiis]

Nuune- Horta sac la yidhaa Toorays ma maqashay adigu?

[NGONGE]

Excellent stuff.

ps

 

The worst people that can interrupt your football are the in-laws. For some reason they always seem to visit when a good game is one too.

 

This one was from the heart.

[nuune]

AT&T, Inaan maqley ayaan filayaa, kolleey waa magac caan ah, bal ii yara balballaari, inaan hilmaamey ayana filayaa.

 

Koley dibigii weyraxsanaana ma ahan, sacii xerada awrta ku jireen soo galayna ma ahan inta uu halkaa naf ka raadiyey ayaa lagu durduriyey, bal sacu muxuu ku maagay haku abaahiyo ratiga.

[Abtigiis]

Originally posted by NGONGE:

This one was from the heart.

meaning the others were from the lower parts! I never miss your insinuations crazy carab!

[NGONGE]

^^ Markad fahanto, waa la iska aamusa badow yaho.

[Abtigiis]

Remember I am Badaw, not Fuley. I can't pass such things with a shrug! By the way, the talk about a cow named Toorays is true. I was watching a match and one man in the Muqaaxi kept on saying 'Sacanagii Tooreeys' baa la odhan jiran.

 

I will share with you another story about watching footabll with Reer-Tuulo guys who are really into the thing. Laakiin at elementary level.

 

Do you believe if I tell you two guys actually started trading blows when one insulted Thierry Henry and the other kept on saying " Aniga waad i caaayi kartaa, hoyadayna waad caayi kartaa, Laakiin Henry ma caayi kartid"?

 

BTW, when did I claim I live in Ethiopia? I saw you say that on another thread? I lived there doesn't mean LIVE there. I can tell where I am in the Qolka.

[N.O.R.F]

Warya A&T. Brazil vs Argentina, Copa America Semi, 2007, Baptista scored in the 4th min and Brazil won the game.

 

Is there any truth to this story?

[Abtigiis]

Do you think I fabricate things Saaxiib? Of course I fit one issue to another, but most of my stories are basedon REAL events. Haa, habeenkaa islaan baa na waashay! But I managed to escape. I haven't finsihed the story.

[Ibtisam]

Originally posted by Ibn Axmad:

Warya A&T. Brazil vs Argentina, Copa America Semi, 2007, Baptista scored in the 4th min and Brazil won the game.

 

Is there any truth to this story?

[Abtigiis]

Ibtisam maxaad ku qoslaysaa?

[NGONGE]

^^ Are you accusing me of telling lies about you?

 

ps

Heh@Aniga waad i caaayi kartaa, hoyadayna waad caayi kartaa, Laakiin Henry ma caayi kartid