Man never marries a premarital sex partner

[Captain Xalane]

Originally posted by blue_hefner:

I wouldnt talk about marriage with someone I had sex with...

Any idea?????

So u would talk marriage with one who had sex with others but not with u?

[blue_hefner]

Hell no... Why would I? It's even worser.

But pple let me ask you this? Did you even read the question before you tend to answer? this arabic saying " Fahm Su'aal Nisf Al Jawaab" meaning understanding the question, is half of the answer. Your answer sounds whether I am asking if that is religiously ok or not. But that wasn't my question.

Matra, who cares if you don't learn Somali or chinese? "My cadaanimo kulahaa" I hate those wannabe's. What's there that Cadaanimo gives you that you don't have now? get ur self str8 first. This is called detabe, you can't just disagree to make ur self look like a person. Did I commit a sin? it's NO. Do I wanna do it? it's no. but it's just scenario given to the members.

[Som@li]

blue_hefner, You are loosing it man,b you are not making any sense, give it up, and never disrespect somali girls. :mad:

[LayZie G.]

Brotha Blue, first and foremost, big ups from sista LayZieG.

 

You handled yourself with the utmost class among these little people, for that you should be applauded.

 

Sista Xalimo aka XalimoPatra went Kim Jong-il on you, and deservingly so, and for that XalimoPatra herself deserves few applause's herself

 

Brotha Che, as always is a big bully, enough with your bullying ways Che.

 

Brotha Blue, you wrote;

 

To start with me, I wouldnt talk about marriage with someone I had sex with...

That sounded more personal answer than a hypothetical one.

 

Your statement sounded as thought you have once been put in that position and you did exactly what you said you would do, not marry that individual and off you go searching for your next mate and somewhere down the road, you might have changed and asked for Allah's Forgiveness, and by no means no one should judge you, because only you and allah know the truth, but this way atleast you now know why everyone who responded to your question was questioning your real motives and might even called you a hypocrite, but now that I read what you and others had to say, I am questioning your current relationship with the woman you're with, and how you truly feel about her, if at all?

 

My question to you is, knowing that you are with a woman, who you supposedly care for, are you considering marriage with this woman? If that is a yes, then your earlier answer about not marrying her if she sleeps with you says that this woman has to get as far away as possible from you, and she needs to really know just how little you think of her and where she stands with u if intercourse were to occur, hypothetically speaking ofcourse.

 

What I've gathered from your analogy among virgins and non virgins is that virgins give you a sense of certainty. If she isn't tainted prior to marraige, less heartache for you, because the likehood of her doing with someone else after marriage is slim to none. On the other hand, you have the non virgin, her likehood of doing with others are high since she is experienced, it means she probably will cheat on u with several men after marriage.

 

I have news for you, whether one had sex or not prior to marriage, it means nothing when deciding your marriage partner. You should be concentrating on more important matters, such as are they trustworthy, are they caring? Do they truly love me? Do I see myself with that person 50+yrs from now, those are the things you should take into factor, not how many sex partner's they have had.

 

What if someone was to refuse you because you are tainted? Someone you love and care deeply for, someone you can't live without? Would you want that same hurt for others?

 

Its time for you to re-evaluate these views you imposing on others.

 

Lastly, I want to say that the men and women who hold this ancient view(marrying virgins only) are probably those that are in their mid thirties and above, I don't think today's generation would care much for marriage, much less marrying a virgin as most are on this fitna themselves, but atleast the younger generation have one thing on their favour and that is they aren't as judgemental as the older generation.

 

We are always hearing about two younger couple marrying while the bride is pregnant, that says alot about the boy/man who is marrying her, that is he is taking responsibility and isn't holding against her or walking away. Not that I am saying you would ever walk from a woman you impregnated or anything.

 

PS:Even thought your question was directed at the men in this forum, you should have been prepared by the reactions you received from the women side.

[Ibtisam]

Hell no... Why would I? It's even worser.

But pple let me ask you this? Did you even read the question before you tend to answer? this arabic saying " Fahm Su'aal Nisf Al Jawaab" meaning understanding the question, is half of the answer. Your answer sounds whether I am asking if that is religiously ok or not. But that wasn't my question.

Matra, who cares if you don't learn Somali or chinese? "My cadaanimo kulahaa" I hate those wannabe's. What's there that Cadaanimo gives you that you don't have now? get ur self str8 first. This is called detabe, you can't just disagree to make ur self look like a person. Did I commit a sin? it's NO. Do I wanna do it? it's no. but it's just scenario given to the members.

:rolleyes;

 

First of all this is not a debate, there is nothing to prove, it is a discussion!.

Secondly there is no need for you to be so rude, you expressed your opinion, she did likewise. It is not fair for you to try &push your opinion down people through, and then get mad is someone disagrees.

 

Finally I don't think you are in a position to stand on a high horse, & say I hate these people and that people. I don't think they care too much for you either. They irony is you don't seem to mind in imitating certain actions of theirs. :rolleyes:

 

I'm done with this thread

[blue_hefner]

Ibtisam, you're just biased, so you can't rule.

U see what I said, but NOT what she said.

I know it's not a good thing to disrespect someone or tell them u hate, but frankly, I don't know how to be nice when someone is rude to me. She's mentioned she doesn't wanna learn somali coz of me, referring whatever she meant, therefore I have the right to act upon it.

I am entitled to have my opinion posted here, if anyone doesn't like it, I could careless but one shouldnt cross his/her limits and insult me.

[blue_hefner]

Lazy girl,

I got ur points which made sense to me. The moral of my thread was to see the different views that we men have towards marrying someone you already slept with. I can be selfish and say I wouldn't marry someone who slept with me or others, but that doesn't mean it's fair for the most. But what I have problem with is that some members are just hard headed and self centered. Some of them commented it's Haram to sleep with someone in the first place. So tell me what does that answer? Of course I know it's Haram, but did I ask you that? On top of that, it's not that I have done it, but just questioning.

It's somehow my privacy, but to honor you I will answer you question whether I wanna marry the girl I am with (u called a woman, next time say "the girl" please,lol) I am highly considering to marry her. And yes I have no problem with her getting as far away coz I have no intention to abuse the soon-2-be wify type.

 

To Dabshid, sxb I am losing what? it's my opinion, wants, desires, rights to behave my way. What the hell u mean GIVE IT UP? my views you mean? To choose my ideal person has nothing to do with disrespecting women, men, or whatever. Just to let you know, ain't no one here to give you credit for what you said. Tell me you would marry anyone even ______, I still respect your opinion, but please don't advice me to give up mine.

[g.L.a.M.o.r.O.u.S]

This waz one heated discussion, we nid to have more of such. all i wanna say, BE CHASTE!! Remember nobody ever died coz of not doin dat. Allah is watching nomatta where u r or who u r wit.May Allah by His mercy keep us chaste, Ameen.

[mantra]

Originally posted by blue_hefner:

Ibtisam, you're just biased, so you can't rule.

U see what I said, but NOT what she said.

I know it's not a good thing to disrespect someone or tell them u hate, but frankly, I don't know how to be nice when someone is rude to me. She's mentioned she doesn't wanna learn somali coz of me, referring whatever she meant, therefore I have the right to act upon it.

I am entitled to have my opinion posted here, if anyone doesn't like it, I could careless but one shouldnt cross his/her limits and insult me.

omg!

you feel insulted? try sleeping with a woman just to have her turn to you and call you a used bathroom and run off to look for a virgin man, now try picturing her entire gender doing the same over and over and over again to your pathetic sex and have them retain an infuriating "moral than thou" attitude!

 

I said it before and i'll say it again, you and your likes are sick people. My question is if you found a woman (I refuse to call her a girl) who is a brand new bathroom why bother yourself with questions about used toilets, isnt it demeaning for you to even associate yourself with them after your repentance? :confused:

 

I urge you to remember that one day you'll have daughters, would you want anyone looking down on them as you are looking down on other people's daughters?

[blue_hefner]

So your point is????

how is it looking down women if I talk about my ideal? I dont wanna involve in premarital sex and if I commit that sin "I ask Allah not to" then I don't consider that anymore. Tell me how's that looking down women or otherwise convince me to marry a whore bal aa aragnee.

[Shakti]

In conclusion blue_hefner has found him self a gullible a young African -American girl 2 mess with but badly wanted a xalimo .

And here he comes with an attempting in lowering xalimos down. now we all know No xalimo will turn the light off 4 ya.. so stop this shitty chat dee. (oye i really feel sorry 4 ppl who actually have xalimo as name-sorry girls)

 

p.s we shouldn’t encourage this sort of thread by posting our answers so, I’m done with this thread ...peaceeeeeeeeeeeee

p2s. Mr blue henfner u let me down, I actually thought I could help u in finding single-mother. But I had no idea u were looking 4 African-American

[blue_hefner]

Devilangle,

May I suspect those anti-blue_hefner thread fall under this category?

Are you aware, that you offended another group of women (Single-mothers) just to make one individual (blue_hefner) feel bad. lol,

What's wrong with single-mothers anyways, atleast they were married and did it in Halal, matter of fact, I wouldn't leave a woman to be single-mother if she meets my standards.

[Som@li]

Dear Blue_hefner

 

First I wish ALLAH never puts me in that situation, but if for some reason it happens, I would marry her without hesitation provided that we still love each other. We were all together, why quit.

 

But there are reported cases where some girls seduce men,get pregnant in the process and thus force him to marry. These are common in the Gulf where pre-marital sex is illegal or where the man happens to be respected member of the community.

 

I am hoping my future wife to be chaste as I am

[Shakti]

Originally posted by blue_hefner:

Devilangle,

May I suspect those anti-blue_hefner thread fall under this category?

Are you aware, that you offended another group of women (Single-mothers) just to make one individual (blue_hefner) feel bad. lol,

What's wrong with single-mothers anyways, atleast they were married and did it in Halal, matter of fact, I wouldn't leave a woman to be single-mother if she meets my standards.

hey hey.. stop talking 2 me :mad:

 

as 4 the single mother comment ..big mistake mr..dont act innocent with the devil, i remember ( i cant belive im justifying myself 2 this heifer ) u looking 4 a single-mother in ur pervious post.

i have the utmost respect 4 our ppl including single-mothers so step ur bs somewhere else..

 

dabshit.. lol@I am hoping my future wife to be chaste as I am

[Shakti]

dp