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Maf Kees

Qabiil Virus Epidemic

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Maf Kees   

ASDS or Acquired Sanity Deficiency Syndrome is defined as a collection of symptoms and infections resulting from the depletion of the sanity system caused by Qabiil virus infection.

 

The symptoms of ASDS are primarily the result of conditions that do not normally develop in individuals with healthy sanity systems. Most of these conditions are opportunistic infections that can be easily treated in healthy people. Research has found out that there is no definite cure for the syndrome.

 

Once the person has been exposed to the Qabiil Virus, the only medication is to prevent the spread of the virus. Since there is no cure, researchers are searching for the part of the brain that contains Qabiil and Qabiil-related information. That part will be cut off and hopefully the patient will wake up without carrying the qabiil virus. We shall test this after a prescription of two week's rest and then expose him to people from his supposed rival clans. He will be asked to hug them. If he does so, the operation will be a success. If additional funds are available, a relocation prgram of Somalis to villages in supposed rival clanlands will be planned and implemented.

 

In the meanwhile, treating these patients is very much possible. Therapy sessions to halt the spread of the qabiil virus and even reduce it are taken into the program by the most renowned psychiatrists in the world. Since there is no Somali government, we ask the United Nations to finance these expensive therapy sessions for the impoverished Somalis.

 

 

Also an online basic therapy session has been released for free which I gladly like to present to potential patients in Somalia Online:

 

STEP 1: Ask yourself what Qabiil has done for you personally?

 

- Has it enhanced your career?

- Has it improved your sex life?

 

 

STEP 2: Think of a relative, friend or acquintance from a supposed rival qabiil and think about the good memories you share with them?

 

 

Step 3: Ask yourself why you hate this qabiil and that qabiil? On what grounds?

 

- Did a member of this qabiil reject your marriage proposal?

- Did a member of this qabiil rough you up one fateful night in front of your friends?

- Did member(s) of this qabiil misbehave badly when sharing Bariis & Baasto on the same plate one night.

 

 

STEP 4: Praise your supposed rival qabiil. (Only to take this step after successfully completing previous steps!)

 

 

STEP 5: Meeting people of supposed rival qabiils.

 

 

After these 5 steps, your qabiil virus should have been reduced to a certain level. If not, you are eligible to take the intesified course from a psychiatrist.

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Scary very scared you made me there dude, quality staff :D

 

ASDS spreading rapidly, is about time to halt it, but while i was reading the medication process aimed at those in SOL, I felt a bit that I as well suffer from this virus.

 

expose him to people from his supposed rival clans. He will be asked to hug them.

What? No way, how can I hug a supposed rival clan. :D

 

Overall, Outstanding input I should say

 

ASDS lol - one might take as a joke other a mockery but this is a real and dangerous existing desease, even worse could be described as the enemy within.

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Jawaazay   

Qabiil is good for you.

 

Quran Allows qabiil

Qabiils makes up a country

Qabiil protects you from other qabiils

Qabiil gives you qaaraan

Qabiil teaches you about life

Qabiil shows you real love

Qabiil makes you proud

Qabiil gives you quality...

 

 

C "Full Metal Jacket"

 

"This is my qabiil, there are many qabiils out there, but mine is the best. without my qabiil I'm nothing, without me my qabiil is everything."

 

Be true to your qabiil...without qabiil you are nobody. Love thy qabiil!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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Katrina   

If studying wasn't sooo boring...qabil hasn't done jack for me. I would like to fire my qabil, daanyeer any suggestions? I'd like to apply for the exchange program. Wouldn't it be fun to change qabil's like a pair of dirty worn out shoes?

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Rowda   

Walaalo Daanyeer, this is very seriouse issue and I thank you for bring it up. I wish ppl could think qabiil as in a seriouse disease like HIV that destroy not only our country but killed many somali brothers, sisters, mothers, fathers,kids,granfathers, & granmothers for no reason what so ever. Ala yaa'arxamukalaah

Maxuu qabiil kuusamay yey? and pls dont include markay ayaga kuubahan yihiin.

Alhamdulilaah, I completed an intense 12 step program to red me of qabilism. I enjoy the company of all kind of Somalis regardless of their qabiil. It will be sad if our legacy as somalis be qabiil instead of good muslims.

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^^^What? :confused:

 

Back to the topic. I don't think qabiil is a virus but a weapon. The right person behind it can be innocuous and even do some good. The wrong person behind it and it's capable of causing great harm. The problem is somalis not qabiilism. It boils down to our ignorance, resistance to change, lacking any sense of civic responsibility...

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Zafir   

Kind Castro is always looking for the best in people’s hearts.

 

I don’t think you are unserious at all, on the contrary I found your little speech here novelty. It at least goes to show that you are who you are {a qabilst to the core}. And sxb am ashamed to crossed path with a fellow Somali, who thinks (love thy qabiil) in this day n age.

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Castro   

^ He's messin around Saaxib. If he truly believed that, he wouldn't ridicule his beliefs by using Stanley Kubrik's (Full Metal Jacket) reference. He wanted to walk to the stage with a bang and it worked. It caught your attention, among others'.

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Jawaazay   

Originally posted by Zafir:

 

I don’t think you are unserious at all, on the contrary I found your little speech here novelty. It at least goes to show that you are who you are {a qabilst to the core}. And sxb am ashamed to crossed path with a fellow Somali, who thinks (love thy qabiil) in this day n age.

 

Take it light man, get that stick out of your A#@! Have a sense of Humor!

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