Crossing the line?....When to ...Or not to...

[Theory]

Eid mubarek..

 

This a true event that happened, and also taken course many times in this life, but however it is the first time it had crossed with mine.

I've noticed in past topics,such as can girl be a friend with a guy or vice versa,and i've heard of all kind of reasons why it wouldn't or would work.

But once again unless you play that scenario in real life

you would not know what to make out of it, which now brings me to my topic...

 

Crossing the Line,

I've had freind relationship with a sista for over

7 beautiful yrs up and down as we both went through

trials and turbelances helped each otha on the most downing moments,we were so close of freinds

that she would be the only one i would call to ask of some sort advises with the complicated mood swinges of some of the other sista's,she would the same vise verse, as my years were going by as i was on my journey to make my self a man,i once stumbled over and found my self in the hands of one of her closes girl friend which two yrs of my life went to her.But still no matter what this sister was there with me, she tells me slowdown

when i was on the fast line as all went on on on

freindship lasted,But this past new yrs eve, things took diffrent spin than normal.As always we would hung out as big group friends her girls my guys and whatever else or whoever else gets dragged into it we just would have fun and nothing more,so as we were on partying she looked stunning as always,and ofcource the brotha wasn't looking that bad either,i smooth talked some of the ladies there, dancing chilling kickin' N' scremING, i approached my frined as always i would give her hard time or what not, picked her out of her will brough her to the dance floor for she can almost keep up with my hyper a$$, reggea after reggea,crunk after krumping than came the slow dance, we normally don't do that shyt, we continued on it anyway,south side chicago steppers

salsa swingin' were getting stepping in to music

like a maze when you finally now edges to it,smoot after smooth moves than BAM,held her like she stepped out of a scene of that movie dirty dancing, with patrick swazem she glanced at me and smilled i smiled back back continued on, the dance floor got empty every went on. with theirs late night partner upz,so as the places around us got empty

we just conmtinued on dancing and later i start it thinking strange like what if....?than i said, naah,but the longer she stayed around the more tepmting i got just to lean over,i've never felt like that before,i'm lying i did once before,lol, but not this strong and than out of the blue.a song sang by tank came on,and i can't explain everything but we just ended up kissing as if one of gone too long,no words for that whole night,

basically two days later, appointment to talk over what happen the night before, and as we talked about we said, it is better let that be bygone and just keep what we always had and agreement, and that right after again,we just wamt it, and is been like that for three days, everytime try to make apology to one another, for this is not worth it, and horrible i am with relatioships, we go at it once more,...

 

so the questions here is when do you not cross the line, or?

[Arawella]

Well, you have crossed the line and who knows you might be unto something beautiful and magical.

 

I would say stop apologising and accept each other feelings. A relationship with strong friendship is truly one to cherish. If your intentions are honourable then tell her how you feel and probably your feelings will be reciprocated.

 

Crossing the line depends on how much you value your friendship nevertheless there are some best friends who were actually ex-couples.

[Chocolate and Honey]

you have already crossed the line when you kissed your best friend on da lips and I'm familiar with that feeling of uncertainty. That kiss could either be the begining of a beautifull relationship or a disaster waiting to unfold.

so keep it simple! asses your true feelings and if you feel like you cant let go, just tell her how you feel. Hopefully, she feels the same

[Jafarel.]

Dearest bro, that which you narrated is a sad story. A story full of sins...(and ofcourse long sentences).

so the questions here is when do you not cross the line, or?

Answer: There shouldnt have been a line in the first place...

 

Dont you know that a man and woman can never be friends without the presence of shaytaan? Dont you know clubbing is Haraam in Islam? Didnt you read the Hadith of our Noble Prophet (SAW): '' The man who has laid his hand on a woman who is not permissible to him will come on the Day of Judgement with his hand tied to his neck. If he kissed her,his lips will be cut in the fire, and if he had sexual intercourse with her, his private parts will speak against him on the Day of Judgement saying ' I did what was forbidden'. Allah Most High will look at him with anger, and the flesh on his face will sag and he will look haggard and old. He will say 'What did I do?' His tongue will witness against him, saying 'I said what was forbidden; his hands will speak and say 'we reached for what for forbidden; each of his eyes will speak and say 'I saw what was forbidden; each of his feet will speak and say 'I went to a forbidden place; and his private parts will say ' I did it' And one guardian Angel will say ' I heard it' and the other guardian Angel will say ' I wrote it' and Allah Most High will say ' I knew it but I concealed it.' Then He will say: ' My Angels, take him and give him a taste of My punishment. Great is My anger against the man who had so little shame toward Me!' And the verification of this is in the Book of Allah: ' On the Day when their tongues and the their hands and their feet will bear witness against them concerning what they used to do' '' (Al-Nur 24:24).

 

The Hadiths of the Prophet (SAW) on this topic are indeed too numerous...so are the Quranic ayaahs..

 

My dearest brother, I advise you (and your 'friend') to repent to Allah and ask for his forgiveness.

 

A man went to Ibrahim Ibn Adliani (RA) and said ' O Abu Ishaq I transgress against myself )by committing sins). Inform me of a deterrent that will deliver my heart'. Ibrahim (RA) said ' If you accept five practices and remain steadfast on them, nothing will harm and (sinful) pleasure will destroy you:

1. If you want to disobey Allah, then do not eat from His provisions. How can you bite the hands that feed you?

 

2. If you want to disobey Allah, then do not live in a place that He owns. How can you eat and live off someone you wish to disobey?

 

3. And if you (are such ingrate) and still wish to disobey Him, then find a place where you can do so inconspicuously. How can you (have the audacity to) commit a sin when He is always Present in fron of you?

 

4. When the Angel of Death arrives, ask him to delay taking your soul for a while so that you are able to make a sincere repentance and perform some good deeds for Allah. The Angel will not grant you your desire and will immediately dispatch your soul to the next world. How can expect to escape?

 

5. When the angels of Hell come to escort you to Hell, dont follow them. You will not be able to resist so how do expect to save yourself?'

 

The man said: ' Enough, enough, Ibrahim. I will make a sincere repentance right now'. The man did so and stayed with Ibrahim (RA) until his death. (Muwaqif Mushriqah Fi Hayatis Salaf: 15)

 

With the style of language in your story, this isnt the exactly the kinda advise you were seeking...But let's face it pal, u need to make Tawbah before the sun rises from the west OR the soul reaches the throat...

 

And Allah knows best.

 

Upon you be peace..

[Miriam1]

salsa swingin' were getting stepping in to musiclike a maze when you finally now edges to it,smoot after smooth moves than BAM,held her like she stepped out of a scene of that movie dirty dancing, with patrick swazem

looooooool oh my oh my that cracked me up! hahhhahah lol, what did you say patrick who...patrick swazem lol

I am out. thankyou.

 

Ps.^Dude above said it all..go pray

[haldhaa]

bro you messed up big time you didn't only cross the friendship line but the Islamic line too

take the brother's advice and ask God for his forgiveness before it's too late

 

may Allah forgive you and every Muslim out there

Good luck

[hodman]

Take a shot at it why not?It just might be the relationship.She's an adult and should be able to figure her own mind out.You am assuming know better than to play this girl like you do the others.As has been said the line has already been crossed so deal with it and move forward.

[Johnny B]

Theory, bro, I understand that you´re beeing bombed by some Nomads with a delayed and censored sensibility, but i`ll try to stay natural and maybe even take it to another level.

 

There is a Swedish expression for what you´re too freightened of, "Knull-Kompis or KK (coco)"

 

Roughly meaning "sex freinds" i think the Somali term would be " sxb caadi ".

 

Go full gas ahead, don´t worry about loosing her, on the contrary you haven´t reached a line to cross YET, a kiss is an innocent expression of mutual feeling, Never play her part of the relationship. a failure many can´t recognize,

she´ll stop ya if a line is there,exactly as you would´ve done.

 

Your relationship is strong,it has many years of mutual respect, mutual aid, mutual trust and all that in it, a kiss can´t n shoulden´t change much.

there can ONLY be two outcomes:

1) you guys will end up getting closer for good or worse.

2) you guys will keep and maintain your relationship but go diffrent paths in life.

 

The worst(best if u like )will be "knull kompis" which per se is not a bad thing, compared to total loss of your innocent relationship

( here i´m speaking of personal experience )

 

if this doese´n turn ur page, i´d too much "Xalwad" today

[Castro]

^ JB, you're one hell of a role model.

 

Who cares who kissed who? Why don't people keep their skank stories to themselves? :mad:

[J.Lee]

LOL.

 

Ever watched a Nike commerical? You should

follow suit.

 

when do you not cross the line

 

Um never, there is always a trap of sorts walaal. The fetus is a weapon, or so I have heard.

[Conspiracy]

umh I seriously don't see the point of sharing "feelings and personal drama" on this forum but let me entertain this topic ..

 

1) You either don't do anything about it, she gets married her husband won't approve with your "friendly" relationship and thats that, The End!

 

2) You go for it as half/half little bit dating little bit friendship not sure , she not sure etc, and one of you die before anything happens, The End!

 

3) You both get married and all that "wonderful" friendship ends like all married couple live miserably ever after, The End!

 

phew! All I need is a crystal ball and chill @ Oxford Street make my own con business :cool: :cool:

[Nephissa]

When you cross that line you are in a new game.

 

From a woman's perspective, I would likely feel more attached to my friend had he kissed me.. than he felt comfortable with..after the fact, and I think that would put a real strain on a friendship.

 

Self control is a beautiful thing, it keeps friendships alive!

[Baluug]

I couldn't really follow what you were saying, it's written very badly to say the least. But anyways, I agree with Jafarel. You have no need to even be around this woman unless you're married to her, because you can expect things like this to happen, no matter if she's your best friend or you just met her. So my advice is either marry her, or leave her alone.

[rudy-Diiriye]

u had it your hand n u chickened!! baq baq baaqaq!lool... there is no line, its all your mind. lol..! homie, dont take no prisoners! run for the next broder! damn. waryaa, i can play this on my head all day!!

 

knock knock!! who is there!! theory! theory who!!

theory, the catholic priest!! looool...!

 

its ok homie! i am teasing! it aint your fault!! blame it on the xalimo! :confused:

[SafiaLuuL612]

I'm not gonna get into the whole religious piece of this, but my advice to you is DON'T MESS UP THE FRIENDSHIP. Trust me you'll live to regret it. Good friendship doesn't also mean good possible relationship, they are two separate, distinct types of relationships----one wouldn't mirror the other.