Teen Rage- Anarchy in the UK

[Ibtisam]

Hello

 

Last night I went to this debate which highlighted that teenagers in the UK are the most unruly, unhappy, and the most feared in the developed world, (based on the research published in the last few years or you use the public transport . Teenagers leaving school today are statistically better qualified than they have ever been before yet seem ill prepared for the adult world. The suggested solution was that in today’s world, emotional, behavioural, personal and social skills have become far more important, in determining their earnings in later life than qualifications provided by schooling which is currently failing. Now I don’t have any children, but every individual knows or have family and friends that are young (teenage and younger) so obviously it is an issue which should concern us all.

 

So what are your views, what has gone wrong with the kids? And how can we put it right. The Speakers included: Janey Walker - Head of Education, Channel 4, Ben Page – Chairman of IPSOS MORI: HE had some seriously disturbing facts and figures, check out their website.

Anthony Seldon – historian and Master of Wellington College , Camila Batmanghelidjh – psychotherapist and founder and director of Kids Company and Francis Gilbert – teacher and author of I’m a Teacher Get Me Out Of Here and Yob Nation.

 

Just to pick out few thing:

 

Francis Gilbert advocated more social control and boundary setting, but is beating kids and policing them really successful, it has not worked for the Somali (African/ Asian kids) as we still use those methods, yet our kids are on the street.

 

Camila Batmanghelidjh is lovely she is currently working in Lambeth area with black youth (including disadvantage large Somali population), she was very happy to see me and spent few minutes high lighting the problems she faces with them.

 

So what do you think needs to be done to help with the issues facing teenagers as they make the transition from adolescence to adulthood, from school to work and test the boundaries of what is acceptable behaviour?

[Ms DD]

Physical correction. That is the answer. Now that physical chastisement has all but disappeared from our schools, ...I see how disruptive the kids can be now. They have no respect for at all because they just arent scared of the consequences.

 

When i was at school in somalia, you wouldnt dare back answer the teachers for fear of the cane.

[BOB]

Originally posted by Ghanima:

So what are your views, what has gone wrong with the kids? And how can we put it right.

These children are spoiled brats and the fault lies with the parents...

 

Parents should be honest and admit that they failed their responsibilities...they are either away for the most of the day or gone for good and when they are at home they are too tired and exhausted to sit down and spend few minutes with their children...and some aren't even too bothered with whatever their children do and the minute the child gets into trouble they start living "in denial"...and they blame all but themselves!

 

If all else fail...send them down here in Africa and we will discipline them for you FOR FREE and send them back to you when we are done with them.

 

 

Peace, Love & Unity.

[-Lily-]

Firstly, I would like to say not everyone who can reproduce should be allowed to become a parent. You see parents that just shock you.

 

Kids need a lot more attention as children before they become teenagers.. Say from the age of 8 to 12 they are old enough to understand what's acceptable and what's not. We have a culture where parents do not take children seriously until they are adults, how many times have you heard ‘war naga aamus’ or ‘maxoo ugyahay’.

 

Once they are teenagers it's really too late to mould them into anything and they no longer see their parents as adored or have an interest in them. Advice, boundaries and rules with uphold able punishments might help. Obviously the area, friends and school will have a huge influence on their life as well.

 

It can’t be an easy job.

[chubacka]

Originally posted by *BOB:

 

If all else fail...send them down here in Africa and we will discipline them for you FOR FREE and send them back to you when we are done with them.

 

this is really not an answer, I seen children sent der, sometimes for years and they come back, after few months dey go back to their old ways, bigger and bolder and also bearing a grudge against their parents.

 

Its often said but its true, you need to start nurturing your child from day 1, and inshallah things will be okay, they should respect authority and not get into serious trouble.

 

I work in a school and children with behaviour problems usually come from broken homes and not much interest is taken in the childs education its really sad.

 

its usually the mother that is strugglering wid unruly boys.

[N.O.R.F]

One thing i cant stand is the language issue. 'Yeah like', 'get me?' and all that nonesense. I discourage kids from talking like that. Read The Independent ya ku yidhaahda?

[Zafir]

Buy new parents for the bad behaving kid s's younger siblings.

[Yaabka-Yaabkiis]

Environmental behaviour are more influence then what parent should do , it is all about modern world changing `behaviour(freedom) they being discovered to different aspects of lives from media to what-ever they see around(especially from their role models, oponion leaders: singers, acters, Gangs), hence transion from adolsences to adulthood is where teens are controlled by unreality-moods they might change letter...

[Ibtisam]

North I was referring to antisocial behaviours, like 14year old having access to guns and shooting each other, not to mention knife crimes! not your dislike/ and/ or their abuse of the English language. some of these kids cannot string two sentences together, let alone read the Independent!

 

Zafir, your point (although not as you put it) has been mentioned by Lily, clearly there are people who have kids, then never should have had them, but there are perfect parents with dysfunctional kids, possible due to influences outside of the home.

 

MS DD; Beating is not working, and discipline can come in different forms, what makes beating more effective? No one ever beated me as a child, yet I was scared of going out of line.

 

Yaab: Yes I get what you are saying, the society influences the kids more than their family life, but the attitude of they will grow out of it is no longer failed, by the time they grow out of it (20+) they have missed school, wasted the best years of their life, and not on equally footing as their peers who have worked hard etc, that is assuming they make it to their 20's which could be hard on the streets.

 

Bob: Having seen the kids in Africa, I now believe that they are not any better than the ones here, in fact the ones here have better opportunities and chance to change, where as those back home just get stuck in the cycle. Again this notion of beating people does not work, you can beat people till you break every bone and still not get anywhere with them.

 

Chuckback: I totally agree, and the absent (even if he is actually present is a worrying factor special in the Somali community.

 

P.s. Some of the responses here by parents are very worrying, seriously guys! somethingwong

[NGONGE]

The arrogance of comments such as "some people should not be allowed to be parents" is quite astonishing.

 

Oh! These are the problems that rile the privileged I suppose.

[Ibtisam]

^It is worrying that yourself who has kids is not worried. No one is privileged in this situation. :rolleyes:

[Malika]

Could it be that society has changed hence the changes having impacted on child rearing methods.

 

Children require alot of intervantion,you can not bring up a child like a plant,even plants need attending too.What I mean is one has to be dedicated in every sense in the childs life.Children need to know there are boundries,there is a consequency to actions and above all they need stability,guidance etc.

 

When I look at the result of our Chinese children in my school,despite some of them having the disadvantage of the language barrier they still outsmart every other ethnic group,a reseach done in America found out the sucess was because of the parenting skill of the Chinese parents.

 

Children in Chinese homes are set high expectation and they better comply,as there is strict desplinary actions.Their time is divided between academic,sports and family which gives the youngester confidence in their ability and enhence their self esteem.

 

Its unfortunate,parenting has becaume a goverment initiative rather then the parents responsibility.This is what happens when Goverments takes the role of parent..beauracy!

[NGONGE]

^^ My two sentences above are linked. Only the privileged (read: fortunate, lucky, etc) would dare utter such comments.

 

As for worrying about children, what's the point of worrying? What will be will be! All that one can do is give it their best shot and hope that is enough. Still, your topic is not a personal one. It is one concerning an entire society. I therefore don't want to hog the thread; I'll let others furnish us with cliches about taking a village to bring up a child, etc.

 

Carry on..

[Resistance]

maybe the powers that be may actually want teenagers in the current state they in. is the order of things, keeping others in check.

[BOB]

Salam Aleikum W.W

 

 

Chubacka,

 

When I said send your child to Africa I wasn't referring to Africa as a general but what I meant to say was...send your child to ME and I will discipline him/her for you for free.

 

If you don't see any improvement in your child's behavior in the first minute he/she comes back to you then you get 100% refund of your ticket money.

 

PS. Don't bother asking how I'm going to achieve that and don't even think about visiting your child until I'm done with him/her.

 

 

Salam Aleikum W.W

 

 

Peace, Love & Unity.