Cheeta Posted February 19, 2004 Ladies welcome to my joint and have sit. My servant will soon be bringing some xalwo and shaax so make yourself comfortable. I would like to discuss with you a topic of concern and I expect your honest opinion. I have dated many a girls and for some reason or another when i buy something special for my girl, she seems to think that i want to buy her love. Am a real nice guy who loves showering gifts on my girl and want nothing in return other than being honest with me and enjoying my company. She in turn starts to demand this and that from me, seeing as that am soo giving. One time this girl demanded a diamond necklace that costs close to a grand for her as a birthday gift. I though birthday gifts or any gifts for that matter were supposed to be a suprise to the receiver. Believe me I have no problem giving diamond necklaces to my future wife, not my girlfriend. Another thing that ticks me off is that she wants to turn me in to a freaking taxi driver. One day this girl had me taking her friends from point A to point Z. So my question here is: Why is that when a bother who cares about you; you in turn start using and abusing the bother? He is not worthy of kind treatment? Do you not think that what goes around comes around? p.s. see how nice am to the sisters. I have already offered them some xalwo and shaax. Enjoy! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Qac Qaac Posted February 19, 2004 brother stand up, and be a man, don't do everything for her, because u r a nice guy. yes u have to be a compassionate person, but at the same time u have to draw the line, or else she would walk all over you. brother to brother advice. i hope we are not talking about girlfriend/boyfriend relationship, we have no place for this, in our culture or in our religion both. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ayaan8321 Posted February 19, 2004 Lets say you date this girl and you guys commit zina....then youll start thinking she´s easy, waan ku meel gaaraa lee.. My point of view is, if a guy buys me gift then ill start thinking, hmm, he wants something in return, asiga ne ku meel gaar lees ila noqonaa :cool: because as far as im concerned money can´t buy you love, maybe small gifts should be overlooked, but expensive gifts out of nowhere?Yaa, waxaas qurun lee kujiraa..nothing in this world is for free Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ScarFace Posted February 19, 2004 cheeta man you ever heard of reversing the LINK like let the gurl buy you stuff. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kool_Kat Posted February 19, 2004 Cheeta, it is nice that you want to buy your girl gifts, but I believe when you're giving someone a gift there has to be a meaning behind it...You just can't buy her gifts everyday or every week or every month... Of course, when you're spending money on her whether it is gift or not for no specail reason...She's gonna think, ok if he got me this, then he should also get me this and that...She'll even ask for things that she doesn't need... All I am saying is that you should ONLY buy gifts for your girl on special occations (ie. birthday, valentines day, Ied, Annaversity, New Year, and etc.)...Anything more that that, you keep the change bro... Walee hadii kale nimanka la use gareeyo aad noqonee...A gift should make the person feel special...And you can't make someone feel special every damn day...And if you do, it'll just become like any other day, then there'll be nothing special about any other occation... What the hell I am sayin...I don't know, I just hope it make sense to you... NOW WHERE'S THE DAMN SHAAX AND XALWO, WAANBA XABEEBSADEE... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoVa Posted February 19, 2004 lool@^^^xabeebsade...woman' r ya screamin' out of ya lungs lool...how ya doing girl??? Cheeta it’s great that you buy your girl gifts on special occations..ain’t nothing wrong with that but when she’ starts demanding things out of no where then it can get a lil bit out of hand… ya gotta understand some women’ like to see whats in a brotha’s jeebkiisa and others could careless cuz jeebkoodaba ka badan...so don’t’ think every women’ out there is after ya dought…there is more women’ out there now day’s that can’ take care their needs wether they need diamond necklace or a vacation 2 barbados… I don’t even think it’s the girl’s fault…for some odd reason I believe it’s ya fault….it’s you who showed her “girl I’ll get ya anything in this world ya want”..correct me if I’m wrong, but when you start showing her something like that…there is high chance that she’ll want everything out there..and expects u 2 show her that you can and willing to spend more everytime that she needs anything since she seen it from ya in the first place…remember ya out 2 stop the..’baby I’ll do anything ya want” next time aa shukaansaneesid iyada lool… Last but not least first of all people shouldn’t be abusing those that care about them so much and to the brothers, many of you all put at the back of your head that you can buy luv as if it’s somewhere in a shelf….y’all need to stop doing that lool’..i’mean taking a sista 2 an expensive dinner’ doesn’t mean’ ya bought her’ ova night…na, just remember lil things count so don’t get ya heads over’ hill…and 2 the sista’s, sometimes we over-look a brotha from every edge, and that something many of us should stop doin’ it .... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rudy-Diiriye Posted February 20, 2004 mack daddy cheeta!lol...u posted on the wrong forum bro! havent u heard the timeless saying! dont trust what a women tells yah!! so next time, if u want a brotherly advice! which i believe is what u need here! post it on the General forum! then we brothas can give the low down!! :confused: u been done by a women and u looking for an advice from a women!!! lord have merci!!! hey, u should be getting the king treatment, na'mean, she should be putting gold rings and the whole 9 yds on u bro!! start with this, dont call her 4 week and dont return her calls! then a get a scape goat xalimo and parade in front of her eyes! when she asks who the hell is dat! just say, oh...just a friend!! then see how fast your status moves to #1... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A7LA-SHU Posted February 20, 2004 Rudy i don't think that is what the brotha was askin for.. i don't think he needs to get another halimo and make a drama there.. Cheeta all u need to do is to know when to walk out and when to stick around sweety.. coz if the girl ain't giving ya the respect and the love you need, what is the point being around her? im not saying she isn't good enough for ya coz i don't even know the girl. but my point is do what is best for ya and what makes u happy. Plus there is alot of Xalimos and None-Xalimos out there.. good luck thou.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
7_steps_2_Heaven Posted February 20, 2004 cheeta,,abowgiis perhaps the girl doesn't like you as much as you like her. that could be an issue..coz if she really and truly wants you and RESPECTS you theres no way she would use you. so you really need to find out where you stand..if you are serious about the sista. me personally ..if my man starts giving me presents without special occassions I would not accept it..and if he keeps doing it I would defenetly get suspicious..I might think that he is after something (all the sistas know what), which could lead to abusing his "kindness". Cheeta don't scare the sista off..and most of all DON'T let no-one treat you like a doormat. ps, women don't like to see the soft side of men..coz they will doubt if they are dating a boy or a MAN! Lets seperate the men from boys Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Macalin Posted February 20, 2004 Buy her a BMW she will stop asking for stuff Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nafta Posted February 21, 2004 ^^^ ...then a villa in spain, then a one way ticket to the bahamas I have to agree with sthml , money can't buy love. If you want girls to accept you fot the way you are then you are gonna have to stop all these materialistic stuff...adiga aye ka arkeen marka hore. There can be other ways to show how much you care for them other than buying gifts for them etc. What happened to a candle lit dinner, if you cook it even better (but thats asking too much of mali men, or am i mistaken), or a stroll in the park, enjoy the lil things first together then move on to the next level. That way you'll know whether the girl like you for you and not because of the gifts you give her. P.S. rudy , u got an obsession with xalimo's or what?? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NoVa Posted February 21, 2004 Originally posted by Nomad 719: Buy her a BMW she will stop asking for stuff good idea' there...Da' might just work out Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Warmoog Posted February 21, 2004 If a guy buys a woman expensive gifts for no reason whatsoever on a regular basis... chances are he's trying to get something in return and isn't really serious about her. It doesn't take a genius to figure that one out. So assuming she's figured it out, maybe she isn't serious about you and is just trying to use you before you two part ways. This may or may not be the case, but if it is then I think you're both kinda hustling each other. My only advice to you is to re-evaluate your priorities. You've already said you don't want to buy diamond necklaces for your girlfriend(s), but would rather save such gifts for your future wife. So with that in mind, I think you should guard your pesos and not waste them on women you're not serious about (i.e. who you don't intend to marry). It seems like some people have bottomless wallets when it comes to buying gifts for girlfriends and such things. But what would those same individuals do when broke relatives in Somalia call? Hmmm, I wonder... Salaamz. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cheeta Posted February 23, 2004 First, I want to thank you all for your opinions. THough I must point out that lots of you misunderstood me. Am in no way trying to buy love nor am I too giving. I just buy a really nice gift for special occasions and that is where the problem stems from. I have to be going now. BYE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SCORPION_SISTA Posted February 24, 2004 "Why is that when a bother who cares about you; you in turn start using and abusing the bother? He is not worthy of kind treatment? Do you not think that what goes around comes around?" First of all I wouldn't say it was a general practice participated in by every woman...And second of all, it is people's nature unfortunately, that kindness is at times considered a sign of weakness or maybe a sign that says "RUN OVER ME"...Everyone one is worthy of kind treatment, espically if they treat others the same way, but not all of us get what we want or even what we deserve in life from others...So my suggestion to you is tell her how you feel in terms of how she treats you and if she doesn't believe or think she has done any wrong then you just have to let her go...Yeah you might say but I care about her and what not, but you know what "where there isn't respect there is nothing zip/nada" and by using you and abusing you as you said your girl doesn't R.E.S.P.E.C.T you...Since she began mistreating you, your only concern should beeen what you going to do about it? That is the question!!!!!!!!!!! As to your question "what comes around goes around?" well since you treat women nicely as you said maybe in your future there would be a woman who appriciates you just the way you are without taking advantage of you..... P.s. I don't agree with idea that men buying gifts for women (eg. girlfriends) without special occassion constitutes a "sinister motives" on men's part...Thank you would be sufficient Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites