A7LA-SHU Posted August 25, 2003 Originally posted by Darman: especially the ladies… I guess what I am trying to say is this…. Are you worried you wont find that special person when you are finally done with school and understandably is older in age? Do you fear having to lower your standards because your clock is ticking and your chances are not as good as before? I would like to hear what u guys think.. i wouldn't say yes or no.. im kinda in between to some extent i don't worry at all, but sometimes i kinda wonder.... Darman well there are some who don't wanna have kids believe me so SCORPION_SISTA is right.. and to be honest i used to say hell no i don't wanna have kids back in the days....but ever since my mom had my baby sister i lovee kids...coz kids are the cutties thing ever..... they make u smile even if u was havin ur worst day ever.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
La-y-La Posted August 26, 2003 Sure, I wouldn't mind, but it wouldnt make any differnce cuz i will still be young when am done wit college. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Business_Man Posted August 26, 2003 The answer to your question is simple!. Why deal with all the fuss of marriage when you can educate yourself and then build your family first before getting married!. You need to be financially secure to get married and marriage is a big step forward in life. A wife is something special to have and to cherish so the only way you can look after her is for you to have your education out of the way and to have a stable job so that you can go to hajj or umra every year!. I know some people dont want to have kids when they get married but how can that happen unless you practice what Kafiirs do!. I am going to do my masters this year so I have really set myself a goal of getting a really nice job,flat/house and then marrying inshallah!. I wouldnt want to live under my families roof while I am married and I am sure you wont either!. The urge is their to marry but I just fast and play soccer to stop intimate urges!. Think about your mum and dad first before having your own family!. I also believe in marriages that have single sex occasions!. Guys come and read the quuraan, give the lady away and later eat a big feast!. The ladies have their little party at night!. This is relgious and my #1 priority when I am financially stable!. So inshallah stay halal and I am sure allah will find a suitable mate for you in time!. Peace. P.S Naag Laatabteey Maarabo!. No boyfriend/girlfriend business!. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Conscious Manipulation Posted August 27, 2003 I know some people dont want to have kids when they get married but how can that happen unless you practice what Kafiirs do!. Are you suggesting birth control is haraam? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Xafsa Posted August 27, 2003 ^^^ thats what I want to know!! Mr Mill: Are you saying that in order for a someone to get married they have to worry about the wordly aspect of it more than the AAkhiro part? You do realize that marriege is half your Iman? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
- diamond princess - Posted August 27, 2003 No Thanx, I'd get married when my *** is ready too. I'm sorry unlike some ppl who can't handle there hormones, I CAN! Suddenly just cause you get the urge to have sex you gotta get married. PLZ!!! .:peace n luv:. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rudy-Diiriye Posted August 27, 2003 r u telling the whole truth nothing but the truth so help allah!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuCkY Posted August 28, 2003 Diamond Princess i couLdnt have said it better myseLf. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
- diamond princess - Posted August 28, 2003 Rudy, What Truth? Or Maybe U Werent Speaking To Me...Lol. Lucky, Thanx... .:peace n luv:. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rising Phoenix Posted August 29, 2003 Originally by Darman: I do respect all the views expressed on this thread thus far, nonetheless I have a question for those who think getting married while in school is not an option, Have you considered the age factor? Do you know that the more you grow older the harder it will be for you to marry the person who has the qualities you want! especially the ladies… I guess what I am trying to say is this…. Are you worried you wont find that special person when you are finally done with school and understandably is older in age? Do you fear having to lower your standards because your clock is ticking and your chances are not as good as before? I would like to hear what u guys think.. :eek: :eek: :eek: Age factor??? There is no guarantee in life anyway. Whether you find your ideal partner at 15 or 35, or NEVER, there is NO GUARANTEE. FULL STOP. I don't understand this age factor. Like someone rightly mentioned, when one is done with College or University, he/she will be in their early-to-mid twenties. This is NOT old at all. Is there an age limit to getting married, especially for the ladies? Let me guess, is the age limit 19-21 years old??? :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: I suggest to those who yapping on about BIOLOGICAL CLOCK, to do their research. At 19-21 your body is STILL GROWING therefore not completely ready to have a baby of your own. There are many misconceptions about getting married in the Somali community. A lot of people get married FOR THE WRONG REASONS!! Such as feeling sexually aroused. As mentioned by Diamond Princess, if one cannot control their hormones, then GO AND HAVE A COLD SHOWER OR SOMETHING!!!. (I've been told that seems to do the trick ) I know some people dont want to have kids when they get married but how can that happen unless you practice what Kafiirs do!. I don't agree on this with you. In the Quran it clearly states that there must be at LEAST two years between each child. Therefore, birth control is inevitable, unless you plan on keeping your hands away from eachother for the two years. Continental Bachelor and Co, here's some info for you all: Article from Muslim relations Tanzim Al-Haml (Birth Control) Birth control is allowed in Islam when necessary, provided its aim is not to prohibit pregnancy indefinitely, unless permanent contraception is valid for medical reasons or other good reasons. One good reason for using contraception exists when one fears that the pregnancy or delivery might endanger the life or the health of the mother. Past experience or the opinion of a trustworthy and reliable physician determine this possibility. Another valid reason for using birth control exists when one fears that the children's health or upbringing may suffer. If a new pregnancy or a new baby might harm a previous suckling child, then one has a valid reason for using contraception. The ideal spacing between two children, from the Islamic point of view, is thirty months. If a woman wants to nurse the baby for two full years, which is the maximum period of the suckling of an infant in Islam, this spacing becomes thirty-three months. Allah (s.w.t.) said: And We have commended unto man kindness toward parents. His mother bore him with reluctance, and brought him forth with reluctance, and the bearing of him and the weaning of him is thirty months." [Al-Qur'an: Al-Ahqaf (46:15)]. There is no need for birth control for unmarried people, since abstinence from sexual relationships outside marriage is mandatory. ///end of article/// Personally, I would not even THINK about getting married while I am at University, or any time in the upcoming TEN years. It is a matter of what has more importance, and GOOD EDUCATION and a GOOD JOB is SO much more important to me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuCkY Posted August 30, 2003 Rising Phoenix thats an interesting piece of information-i didnt know that so thanks for cLearifying that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rising Phoenix Posted August 30, 2003 ^^^ You're welcome, sis. There just seems to be so much mis-information out there - while the correct information can be found easily, whether online or from the Holy Book itself. Just shows that you shouldn't take someone else's word on certain topics. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
A7LA-SHU Posted August 30, 2003 Rising Phoenix thanks for that website. it got so many info mansha'allah. i was readin and readin.. i liked it. thanks again dear.. sallamat.. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
