Bambina Posted April 24, 2003 Sup to ma nomadz ,I think dat marryin while bein in college isnt dat hard izz not a mission impossible.To be honest it's not even a big deal,most of the time ppl think dat marryin at a young age is dificult cuz u have to complete ur studies or u wont have time to see each other and the blabla goes on.But the truth is even when ur done wit ur studies u still have to work right?And then u might not always enjoy a quiet moment wit ur husband or wife everyday cuz u might come home late from work.My point is it doesnt matter whether ur in college or not ,if ur wit the right person and ur both willin to compromise ,things might work just well,Allah is wit us. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Double_Dose_of_Delicious Posted April 24, 2003 first of all...like to thank Darman for bringin' about this topic because personally speakin', i've actually had face this question. I'm not married, so u know the road i chose. I chose this road cuz of several reasons...first i had goals like many...n' uh..i knew that in order to achieve, i would have to curb all distractions...n' unfortunately i saw marriage as a huge distraction not to mention the major obstacles i would have to face after marriage...i wanted to be fulltime wife/mom....and dat wasn't going to happen if i went to school...i pondered for a while about quitin' for a year n' going back after a year or so to school...but then again...i didn't wanna be like those older folks i see in my classes strugglin' to keep up.... i don't wanna write an essay here so imma stop (i hate readin' essays)....but my point is...i didn't get married cuz i had prioratized my life...and at the top was education....i think that once the individual is educated..luv and moreover marriage, like all other things in this world, will come knockin' if Allah meant for it to happen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Senora Posted April 24, 2003 I'M A COLLEGE STUDENT AND I SURELY KNOW WHAT MOST STUDENTS THINK ABOUT(A.D.I.D.A.S). SO I ENCOURAGE ALL MY BOTHERS AND SISTERS TO MARRY AS SOON THEY FIND THE RIGHT PERSON LOL,great words of encouragment,LOL... but it sounds to me like your promoting marriage for the wrong reason. Oh and to answer the question, yes I would. We are just talking about marriage here, not kids, so even though Marriage brings along with it hardships and responsibilties, i think i can handle it. Plus college really isnt that hard, as long sa you know how to manage your time wisely......it's nice to come home from a long and stressful day with your supportive hubby waiting for you to make things all better, lol Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Haneefah Posted April 25, 2003 Nope...well it kinda depends, If I'm doing my PhD, maybe...if I'm doing MD, hell no....and during undergrad is just crazy cuz ur still very young...that's just my opinion Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BoYz_at_lovezone Posted April 25, 2003 sisters and bros....i dont know why u think this is very simple and u can just do it. someone said we r not talking about kids but we are talking about marriage, do u mean that when u marry u wont have kids?. you have to think about that. one who married could realize this, but we guys standing outside have no clue about this, well i really dont know about those guys live in western countries how they deal with it, but for us live in eastern region would face a problem if we marry while doing school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Senora Posted April 25, 2003 someone said we r not talking about kids but we are talking about marriage, do u mean that when u marry u wont have kids?. No i mean that if i ever decide to get married while I'm still in school, I would have to push the option of having kids a little later on. The reason being that when i plan to have children, I only want me, myself, and my husband taking care of them. So that requires a lot of time, but if I'm still in school, that would make it a lot more harder. But with just marriage, it makes it a lot easier, cause unlike a newborn baby, my husband can understand...... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Haaruun Posted April 25, 2003 What's the connection between college and marriage...I have a friend of mine who got married when he was in high school. They kept everything simple...went to the masjid and engaged there....worked after school and later enrolled to university.......they now have 3 children, Mansha Allah Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rokko Posted April 25, 2003 Well, it all depends on how flex both partners will or are..na'mean. So, if they both got family to support back home..and will be meeting at the Xawaalad every other Friday or monthly.., I would guess it's better they wait..na'mean cuz whatever is left after the Xawaalad won't be nuff to support the family. By finishing Colllege or getting higher paying Job..then they should have no problem..and and speaking of Xawaalad, dang it's friday today huh...shooooooooot..when do they close that Dahabshiil.. Holla Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Captivating_SouL Posted April 25, 2003 Personally, i wont mind getting married while going university if (& only if) there's a boarder keeping us sane..meaing finacially. All you studednts out there, know what i'm saying, walaahi if one is struggling paying off the bills,tution etc..then marriage did be the last thing. Besides you dont want ruin your relationship over materialistic things na'mean. There are ups and downs of college-marrying-anotha college student...but you know what' if both of you pass that struggle together...i'm sure you did be together million years to come ...since masks will be revealed along the ways..and all the reasons you luv em..ya'll feel me...but then again, ---and let me add this...marriage and going school wont under no circumstances work if there's a child in between...i mean how on earth do you manage to pull 3 things at once...we're all human, even though at times our ego makes us aware of the reality lool. But eh'..if there's a luv,trust,openness,communcation,financial, then yeah it would work...anywho said my script..peace in the midwest. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mujahida Posted April 27, 2003 Deeqa & Khayr & Bambina..MashaAllah such cute replies! Ah my personal opinion would be YES. I am attending my frist year in College. It's all wonderful I guess. Why think it's scarry? I mean if u have the right person. I might even pretty soon! InshaAllah. Wishing you all a bright Future. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
XawoTako Posted April 27, 2003 I don't think that university or college have so much to do with it as maturity. I think it's about when you become a person as a whole, as in when you have made firm views about the world and have established who you are. Obviously you change as you grow older and your whole views and attitudes about the world do too. For example you're a differnet person at 19 compared to 21. Changing as a person is inevitable but to an extend. Ii don't think it would be fair to change and do a U-turn on your partner because you have changed as a person and this might create problems for you later on. Plus, marriage isn't just about living together, there are bills to pay, sacrefices to make, other stressful relationships to maintain (eg. in laws). Like we all know, marriage requires a lot of work, you have to be fully ready and prepared for it. I want to do all I can before I settle down (travel etc.), I don't want to have any regrets or any resentment towards my new family and I would want all my experiences to noursih my family. So basically, I don't know how anyone would want all that stress on top of growing up drama , assignments and exams. Let's not foget about the issue of possible children. But then again only you can truly know when you are ready for what. That's my bit. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Miriam1 Posted April 27, 2003 Yes i would. It depends on the individual if they feel that they are perpared for marital life, i suggest they go ahead.Being in university isnt a roadblock to marriage unless u wish it to be. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hibo Posted April 28, 2003 slam elikum, 1st of all i think this topic is to much important to have informatiom about it ,im in unv know and really i think to marry but there"s many thing or problem i can solved to marry . i wanaa areall advaice to what to do. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites