Suicide, Somalis Society

[Abu-Salman]

Posted a while back on Djibnet.com, a most tragic theme:

 

 

Djibnet.com, Posté 22 octobre 2004 - 12:35

 

A Young Pregnant Woman Burns Herself To Death!

 

 

two days ago, a funeral took place at T3 Neighborhood, Balbala. it was a young djiboutian woman from Dikhil, a district located at least 110Km south to Djibouti-ville. "she burned herself to death" a woman commented. "she was pregnant, two people in one! what a terrible loss!" added another woman.

this was not the first time I heard such a suicide. for the last 20 years I have heard/seen many similar cases in which the victims were all young women aged between 16-35. they had something in common; a litre of kerosene, one sparkle of matches, flames spreading all over, screaming, yelling for mercy, collapsing

and death. it is a horrible scene that you could ever imagine in your lives. But what is worse is the negative attitude of our society toward this issue. it seems that our human consciousness died for a long time that the only thing we repeat about this inhuman situation, is our old traditional argument;"killing one's self is a big sin, or she is in Hell because she has gone against our own religious teachings!!"

ladies and gentlemen; before we draw any conclusion we have to ask ourselves these questions; what is the problem in the first place? why a young pregnant woman would have killed herself if she had been happy in her life? there should be something wrong either in her decision to commit suicide or in our judgement when we speak of these women as being guilty and cursed!

have we ever given the chance to speak out and tell their stories? have we ever listened to their cries when they are oppressed and mistreated by the dJib society.

concerning religion, I think before we

talk about Paradise/Hell and Divine Justice in the world to come, we had better give a human justice to these women because I know Allah is just and fair; He wants us to be just and fair with others.

peace.

 

 

P.S I copied this from REPUBLIQUE-DJIBOUTI. COM because it is really a sad story and I would like you to read maybe this could happen to your sister, daughter or aunt!

 

thanks.

king(1)

[Abu-Salman]

Western clinical & mental health perspective in the comments:

 

 

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Salaam aleikoum,

 

It is a very sad case and I wasn't aware that this sort of thing goes on in Djibouti. However, obviously this poor woman felt suicide was the only path open to her, may Allah forgive her and may she rest in peace. Although there probably is the social element: pressure from family, father of the child who let her down etc. , there is another aspect which I am think of, as I've become aware of this when dealing with somali people and it's the aspect of mental health. Now I'm not saying this young woman was mad but there are many degrees of psychiatric problems which do not seem addressed in your society. Of course there are exaggerations in western society where people go to see psychologists and psychiatrists far too often but in your society mental instability seems taboo. I stress the word 'seems' as I'm an outsider! I have known somali people whose behaviour is odd to say the least and yet, even when given the opportunity for medical help, it is refused. When it is accepted, they do not seem to be able to discipline themselves to continue the treatment. Sometimes a short course of medication can lift feelings of depression, post-natal depression in women, trauma. I've known women incapable of looking after their children, their husband or their home and who prefer to lie around, rather than seek help.

Is this a taboo subject in your community ?

 

 

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you are right, Linda, MENTAL HEALTH is somehow a taboo because scientific illiteracy and traditional customs. we do not have enough mental health institutions in djibouti

[5]

What are you trying to say Abu-Salman?

[Abu-Salman]

Women suicide by immolation was deeply shocking a scene for us as witnessing children back in the 90s but I'm still perplexed about immolation for reasons related to "love" etc.

 

Probably, TV series, magazines and more generally acculturation to Western norms are directly responsible in tragedies like these, now even more common abroad in the diaspora ("she's gone with Jamaicans", single mums raising illegitimate children from different "fathers" etc).

 

It seems prevention is hardly a priority while Islam for many merely means traditional ritual performed on some occasions...

[Peacenow]

22000 people every year in Japan kill themselves. The statistics in Somalia do not reflect a great problem.

[Cara.]

I've heard of the phenomena in Afghanistan, but this is the first time I've heard of Somali women doing this. Truly heartbreaking.

 

Afghan women who turn to immolation

 

By Martin Patience

BBC News, Kabul

 

Sitting in her family's mud brick home, Shanas recalled the day she set herself on fire.

 

The 16-year-old doused her legs in petrol and then with a match set the fuel alight.

 

"The next thing I remember was waking up in the hospital surrounded by my family. That was three or four days later."

 

From what Shanas says it is unclear what drove her five years ago to take such drastic action.

 

She may have been unhappy about her engagement during that period.

 

But what is clear is that her story is one that is repeated across Afghanistan.

 

Lack of freedoms

 

Self-immolation among women has the highest recorded levels in Herat province (although many other provinces provide no data on the subject).

 

Most of the women are in their teens or early 20s and are recently or soon-to-be married.

Experts suggest that a combination of poverty, illiteracy, domestic violence and lack of freedoms continue to drive this decades-old trend.

 

While the Afghan constitution - written after the fall of the Taleban in 2001 - enshrines equal rights for men and women, much of the country remains conservatively entrenched.

 

At the burns centre of the provincial hospital in Herat, Dr Mohammed Jalili knows more than most about this gruesome practice.

 

He says he has seen more than 80 cases of women committing self-immolation in the past year. The majority of these women have died from their injuries.

 

"Many of the women and their families say 'it was an accident'," he says. "It's their way of hiding their shame about the act."

 

But Dr Jalili says the cases are often easy to detect. Apart from the extent of burns, one tell-tale sign of an act of self-immolation is that there are no burns on the arm used to pour the petrol.

 

Shocking response

 

At the hospital, Dr Jalili was treating two women. He had operated on 20-year-old Anargol three times, including a skin graft operation on her badly scarred neck.

 

Anargol says she had committed self-immolation after arguing with her husband.

 

When asked whether she had a message for other women, she had a shocking response.

 

"Don't burn yourself," she said, lying on her hospital bed. "If you want a way out, use a gun: it's less painful."

 

It was an absolute cry of despair, and something rarely heard from women in this deeply conservative society.

 

But according to Soraya Balaigh, director of the provincial department for women's affairs, it is an emotion that many women relate to.

 

"Pressure is often put on these women by their husbands or the mothers-in-law," she says.

 

"Violence is common and many women are desperate. I had a woman in this office who begged me to kill her here rather than send her back."

 

But there are some women who think that small steps are being made in the field of women's rights.

 

To mark International Women's Day in March, an arts and crafts fair was held in the city, with all the items made and sold by women.

 

Hundreds of people visited the fair selling an array of items, including jams, oil-paintings, religious sayings carved in wood and wedding cakes bedecked in decorations.

 

"I wanted to show that women can do some things better than men," says the organiser, Kandigol. "We want to have the same rights as men."

 

But Kandigol, like many women here, is realistic enough to know that this is wishful thinking at the moment.

 

Some will continue to feel isolated and desperate. And a few will decide to make a terrible, painful escape - and set themselves ablaze.

 

http://news.bbc.co.u k/2/hi/south_asia/79 42819.stm

[Zinki]

^It took me 10 minutes to figure out your nick.That enough was a suicide of some sort for me. The sort that only a mystic would understand. :rolleyes:

[grasshopper]

people kill themselves all over the world...here they use pills, guns or knives. in all the ways to kill yourself though, burning is the one I never understood. if you're going to kill yourself it should be quick and painless.

 

I used to watch bollywood movies with my mom when I was younger and even as a young kid I got annoyed at how most of them ended with the girl putting herself on fire. what a ****** thing to do.

 

anyway, it's sad when the woman feels like that's her only way out. (I'm just adding this line so you guys don't think I'm heartless.)

[FatB]

its a horrible way to die being burn, you don’t actually die from the burns itself, what kills you is the poisonous fumes released from your burning skin....