This page is about satire and parody. It has nothing to do with who is winning a war and who is losing. If greiveing clan boys think it is, so be it; they can go hang. I am not to be denied my right to parody political events in Somalia because I have to babysit the nonesense of hateful kids who read mischeif in all things. I will continue the parody even if Madoobe's head is cut. If Gabbal fails to win in time for me to be also making fun of the demise of the other side ( FC Madoobe ), it is NOT my mistake! Marka kuraygan should go and open a calaacal page where I promise to join and commiserate with them. This one is for a different purpose. Stop bullying me.

^ waa sax Dhagax-tuur ee MMA iyo Somaalidu kolkeey doorkan Kikuyu lackeys qaxootiga ah eryeto yayna sidii waayihii hor ilaa Dhadhaab iyo Kenya kaga soo hadhin. Waa inay ilaa Nigeria meel ka sokeeysa kaga soo hadhin. Kenya haday baxdo waan idinka adag nahay waa waxa lugooyada ina baday ee ina lumiyey. For now, let Allan Green ala Tilamook commentate for the second half. Tillamook, do you think Ahmed Diiriye is quiet on the wing because he is misfielded?? And why is FC Madoobe playing so cautiously? Why not utilize set pieces?

Saalax, Gabbal et al will cry blood. That is the price of clan chauvinism, political greed and mindless ambition. Sad but Gabbal's tears may not dry for a long, long time because he sees no value in engaging in peace and reconcilliation. He is an angry man filled with hate and revenge and hate never wins.

Breaking News: Saying the Dam-ul-Jadiid of Egypt and President Mohamed Morsi is overthrown by the Egyptian army, General Yusuf Mohamed Siyad Indhacadde has just read a statement on Radio Star FM in Mogadishu, asking President Hassan Sheikh Mohamud, whom he calls the Morsi of Somalia, to resign within 48 hours or face a militia ouster. The General says President Hassan failed the nation and should step aside. Actually the game we talked about may be postponed due to this emergency!!

Somaali waa wada qaraabo; waxa meesha ka dhacayna wax fiican ma aha; but this is satire and it is indifferent to time and pain. Adiguse MMA yoow, Soomaalinimada iyo wadaniyada kaligaa baan kugu ogeeyn in dhaweeyde dheg ha dhigin wararka Daa.r.oo.dka!!!! Soomaaalinimadaada aan Banadir iyo Bay dhaafsaneeyn ayaa sax ah; dadka kale ee wada dulliga ah ee shisheeyaha la shaqeeysta waa in la cidhib tiraa. Soo sidaa ma aha? Ileen waxaan beeraleey aheyn somali ma ahee.

The technical team has debated the inclusion of Omar. Many thought Gaandhii offers a better speed and agility. Omar is our Valderemma, slow but skilled. He is also a team player. We could have fielded Gaandhi who is good with the ball but we feared he will disrupt team cohesion as he thinks he should have been made the captain. He is a bit of Balotelli, unpredictable. My prediction is that FC Madoobe will win 2-1. Gabbal will be sent off for dangerous play, and Xassan Sheikh will concede a penalty.

This week's biggest game is between defending champions FC Madoobe and relegation threatened Saaciid 1969 Line ups: FC Madoobe 1. Aden Bare Ducaale 2. General Chirchir © 3. Mohamed Faroole 4. Colonel Sabareey 5. Xinnfanin 6. Xildhibaan Xidig 7. Fartaag 8. Seerar 9. Ina laba-go'le 10. Ciilmooge 11. Omer Abdirashid Coach: Uhuru Subeer Daring Club (D.C) Saaciid 1969 1. Wasiir Mire 2. Hassan sheikh © 3. Hosh Jibriil 4. Abdikarim Guleed 5. Dastuurka 6. Is dawladeeyn 7. Ahmed Diriye 8. Colonel Cabbas 9. Kaliil 10. Gabbal 11. Mandate Coach: Caasha Xaaji Hiraaab Referee: Nick Kay ( British) Linesmen: Museveni, Haile and Erdogan Both teams are missing key players. FC Madoobe has the influential ina-laba-goole, who is naturalized Jubbalander. He plies his football in jigjiga. But they are missing Gabre, and Aw libaax. Saaciid 1969 made forced substitutions as four of their top strikers are missing through injury and suspensions. The team is without veteran Bare Hiiraale and talented full-back Baasto, both injured; while Baaleey and Buraale are suspended for collecting two yellow cards in previous matches. Prediction: It will be a tough game as Saaciid 1969 must play the game of its life without the most experienced and dangerous strikers. If they score goals, it will probably come from their number 5, 6 and 11. FC Madoobe needs a draw to win the cup. They will probably play a counter-attack game. Key players in this game for FC Madoobe will be their goalkeeper Ducaale and number 7 Fartaag, a speedy midfielder who will lead the counter-attacks, and who will benefit from knowing the weaknesses of his former team which he is facing in this game.

1- FC Madoobe 2- Real Baasto 3- Jaabo Jaabo Buraale 4- Hiiraale Athletic 5- Saaciid 1969 6- Baaleey Wanderers 7. Fardojaan Hotspur 8- Alshabab Juniors 9- Orlando (Saleebaano) Pirates 10-Red Star Kikuyu 11- Unuka United Meanwhile, there are five African Presidents in Mogadishu today. Tolow ma AU meeting baa? These Presidents are: 1- President Hassan Sh. Mohamud ... President of the Federal Republic of Somalia 2- President Ifiin Hassan ... President of the Republic of Baastoland 3- President Bare Aadan Shire ( Hiiraale).. President of Kacaan-land 4- President Baaleey President of Masago & Tobago 5- President Omer Buraale President of camelwana

Gabbal is actually right. Cabbas and Barre's new combined forces are not Alshabab. Acccorrding to AllGalgaduud.com, they are renamed " dhalinyaradda dib u xoreeynta dalka" (DDD). Nothing wrong with that, except that for the benefits of the international media, the DDD will have to be translated into English and Arabic. Now, I am not good in Arabic, but I can figure out what DDD would be: al shabab li taxrir al wadan. We can still argue that the name's similarity to the islamists is a coincidence. But at least given that Barre has already said he shares the vision of fighting kenya with Alshabab, we can safely say the two groups are now like Manchester United and Manchester city: both in the English Premier League, both football teams; both fighting for the same goals. Is that fair?? On Gabbal, walaahi, I regret spending so much engery in arguing with him. If only I knew delusion can never be defeated. But, i agree with him that Cabbas with estimated 12,000 fighters is eating camel meat and milk near Kismaayo. I heard that too. I have no problem with that report; my only concern was whether the camels in the regions could have sufficed to feed the army. Mise geelii waagii dhaweyd Australia ayaa lagu laayay lalahaa ayaa hilibkiisii maraakiib loo soo saaray? As El punto said maalinba waa sheeko cusub. Markuu Cabbas dhamaadana waa Gabbal oo drones wataa ayaa caawa SOL ka ambabaxay oo Kismaayo u sii jeeda! Markaa anigu waxaan idin kaga tagayaa heestii Hibo Nuura iyo: Maxaa heley kaskaagii Iyo kohaashadeenii Sheekaduu ma kow iyo Kun habeeen mid socotaa Kun habeen mid socotaa???? :D Xaaji xundjuf, Adigu hal qalad unbaad leedahay. Hubsiimo la'aan taasina waa tii laga gabyay oo waa hiddo. Kolkuu ku yar oo qiiraysan thread ah Kaliil with 2000 soldiers is marching soo qoraba, madaxweeyne cusub baa jubbaland u soo baxay iyo wax la mid ah baad dadka ku wareerin. Midda kale markii somaliland iyo Puntland la sameeynayey waa la isku dagaalay; waxooga dagaal wuu jiri kalaa jubbaland na ee markii laba xabadood dhacaanba balaayaa dhacdayda jooji. Reerkan aad neceb tahay ee long foot na dadka waa inay wax ka siiyaan jubbaland.

There is a potential for a great RAP style somali music ala Faarax Murtile here. Biito, biito, biito Aaaahah Biito aan ciyaarno Aaaahah Bare waan soo waayee Aaaahah Buraale miyuu hurdaa Aaaaahah Baleey bustaha siiya Aaaaaahah Baastadii yaa naga cunay Aaaaaahah Jaw! Kaw! Naw! Kenya bax! Aaaaaahah Ala hoobaalayoow heedhe, Dawladiiyeey heedhee, Raisal wasaare heedheeeeee

There is a potential for a great RAP style somali music ala Faarax Murtile here. Biito, biito, biito Aaaahah Biito aan ciyaarno Aaaahah Bare waan soo waayee Aaaahah Buraale miyuu hurdaa Aaaaahah Baleey bustaha siiy Aaaaaahah Baastadii yaa naga cunay Aaaaaahah Jaw! Kaw! Naw! Kenya bax! Aaaaaahah

Gabbal, naga daa baalaxooftada isbiirto layaashi hargeisa ileen matihide!! Waa ku sidee ninyahow. Midda kale kolna "somali Government" said this and that ha ohan, kolna anagoo reer laba kacleey ah baa geel Kismaayo ku qalanaya ha na odhan. Ta danbe ayaa sax ah ee ta hore ee dawladeeynta inaga daa fadlan. Laba bilood ka dib anagaaba dawlada Federalka noqon doona oo dawlada hala maqlo odhan doonee adigoo diidan yaan lagu arkin. Waaxid qabiileeyste ah oo ileen boodka isku qariyaa aduun u dhib weeyn! Xili Tolka reer Kacaan iyo xisbigu ilma adeer run ah yihiin oo dawladnimada aad laba adeer ah kala tirsataan ayaad ababtay markaa wixii oo is badalay unbaad dawladii baa sidaa tidhi haysaa!! Xinnfanin, Anigu Puntlander aan ma gudbe aheeyn Gheele iyo Baashe ayaan hayaa, iyo adiga.

Gabbal, been baad sheegtay. Bring it on. Kenya ha baxdo bari and we will see. Shalay baa la is waydiiyey oo nin oday ah baa yidhi " war horta meesha reer Kacaan inagaga adkaan jiraan ee ay maalin walba sheegayaan xageey aheeyd?" Fikirkaa buka ee reer hebel anagaa ka adag ah waa waxa ku lugooyeey. Asxaantana hargab baad ka qaadaan. So BRING it on dark boys! Xinnfaniin Shalay mid xun oo reer puntland ah oo isoo diray message baa aad uga xanaaqay. Wuxuu ku leeyahay " war baryhan ba reer kacaan anagoo aan waxba ku sameeyn ayey noo fak fakanayeen; maanta dhagaha lagu dhuftay oo ******** is heleen." After he said this, he added the annoying part: "Gun, gunbaa kaa dhicisa" ku lahaa... Ciyaala suuq!!

Gabbal waraaqo jecelaa ma awawgii baa ingiriis ah horta! Kolba warqad baa la soo saaray unbuu leeyahay. Igad baa kan tidhi, EU kii kale tidhii, Gedo ayaa war saxaafadeee soo saartay; wasiir hebel baa xamar sidaa ka yidhi... All good except the thing has really moved from paper now. Kibir iyo awal Kenya ayaan ku geeyay ee maantana Nigeria meel ka sokeeysa kaaga hadhi maayo, ayaa la eeday. Iyo Saaciiid oo 9 bilood Xassan lacag kaga dhameeyay give me more money I will deliver Kismaayo. I am told Hassan is looking for a better partner who can deliver. Bal kaalaya oo meesha Madaxweeyne ku xigeen hada ka noqda, after a short while na doorashaa dhacayaa ee let us even agree on a rotational presidency xitaa waa lagu yidhi reer kacaan. Maya ka kac kursiga ileen anigaad waligay askari ii ahaan jirtee adigu ma is taahishide. That can ony lead to bloodshed. I am not saying one will win, but it sure will not bring peace. Arrogance draped under whatever name constitution, dawladnimo meel aan dagaal aheeyn ku gaadh siin maayo. Unfortunately blood have to be spilled to make some with Gabbal's mentality the futility of false clan pride. Miskiin Macruuf Aqyaarna, sheeko tacbaan ah oo Soomalinimo ayuu baryahan meelahaa la wareega sidii oo aan anagu Oromo ama Zulu nahay! Goormaa reer hebel qudha danta somalia kuwa ka taliya noqdeen??? Runta ha la isu sheegoo...yaan harag shabeel la isu xidhan! For now,heesa dalabaadka 1 da luuliyo ayaan idiin kaga tagayaa. I did not want to do this but Gabbal's waraaqo really called for it! Ku soo dhawaada heestii "New York City Life" iyo Tony Wilson... "Eddy's dead, shot in the head By a brother, brother Who is gonna tell his mama Who is gonna tell reer laba-kac-leeyin"

There is no accusation from Mogadishu, i mean SFG. This morning, Kenyan Foreign Ministry summoned Somali Embassy staff here in Nairobi to explain the accusations. The staff called state house in Mogadishu, aka, President Hassan's Office. The instructions was that they can not say that the allegations made by the junior minister acting on the order of the PM and tolnimo responsibility is the SFG's position. File closed. Sow markaa warku uma eka, dheg ha u dhigina waa war reer saar Gedoode!! Yaan la isu dawladeeyn, jubbaland na dawlad ma aha ; Office of PM na dawlad ma ahe. Reeraha hala kala qabto.