Wow! I didn't know we were independent. And I don't mean Ethiopia. Look harder.

Damn you nice legs. . . . Jaaja

Man, / / Who started this...whoever you are, you need to get laid.

ChickFlick is the only movie that can get you laid. . . . Get your filthy, soap smelling hands off of my chickflick…They’re mine.

And, is this the reason why you dropped out of collage? . . . Your parents sent you to be better than them, and you dropped out and went on all out freaking Girls Gone Wild video tryout? . . Is this according to how many parties each city hosts or is it how many 50 Cent look alike are there? . . . Get me out of this misery and tell me why in the freaking hell did you do this. . . Why damn you, Why?

Can Anyone of ya'll freaks tell me where the Bathrooms are? . . ....And 2day's paper too. . . . . Thnx

Can we start this game again? . . . We've been playing for a freaking month and I got lost three weeks ago.

Those poems are all about Booty-dance you should get permission from yar parents and finish yar milk first, before we enlighten you with lust and lots booty issues

No! He was more like bit Horny, High on Gabay and a mean case of Heerbaadiyenism, God knows what happen the day Hodan did the booty-dance “Hadhka Galay Hurdada weey xuntee hoheey maxaa is seexshi…The guy miss the matinee show, for crying out load. Tell me what else can make a man say “Hooheey” Hooheey is for chicks’ man and Alla Ba’ayeey and all that stuff. The guy wasn’t even on his right state of mind. It ain’t love Girlfriend. It got to be a Lust gone amuck. HORNY!

Aniga maalintaan $100.00 oo isku taal arkay baa iigu yaab badnayd. . . . Lacagtu Badanaa! Armaan la fasahmaa oo Subcis hees la moodaa? . . Maalintaa Deodorant-ka barafuun mooday oon isku buufshay baa iiga darayd. . . Maalintaa Sisterad faanshee "Baby you got a big mouth" idhiyee "FEEDH!" igu qaadday baa iiga sii dareyd. . . Maalintey "EAT ME!" itidhiyee "BABY IM FULL" idhi baa iiga waalayd. . . Galabtii aan Booc Tubaaka cunee geedka hoostii "Wareer" gam'ee siddeedii fiidnimo islaantu iga toosisaa iiga sii darayd. . . Yaabku waa yaabkii, Aayuhu waa halkoodii, Nasiibku waa sidiisii, Waxaadan heleynna, awalba laguuma qorin. . . Wa Bilaahi Towfiikh.....Towfiikh halaygu salaamo.

Dee Maskiin Macruuf Waryaa baan kuu aqaanee ma markii Somalia Online face-Lift loo sameeyey baad magacii bedeshoo magacan cusub isku dhiibtay? Sxb Aniga waan kuu nabad qabaa dadkiina "Walay" iga tahay inaan ka war hayn meel alaale iyo meel ay ku danbeeyaan aniga aduun baan ka war doonoo sidii feedh iyo laad la iigu waday baan imika asaasaqay. . . . . Sxb Warka isii.

War anagaa mgaalada baas kaaga soo horeeynoo wax kuu kala fasiri doonnee na dhegeyso badowyahow. Yaa ikhii talaata beesteen ismac, maraa waaxid abadan: Saqiirka tubaakada cunahaya AK47 ka dheer oo uu qaadi kari waayay buu sidtaayoo aabihii buu baadda ka qaadaa. oo waa askarteeni berito. Ciroolaha beenta cabbaa waa madaxdeenii beritoo iyagaanu dowlad ka sugeynaa (Iinsha Allah, waa hadduu Eebe idmo) Sirqo Dhillo HIP-HOP-key noo qaadaayoo R&B-da, RAB-ka iyo Soul-kaba iyadaa nooga mas’uul ahoo waa fanaaniinteeni berito. Magmagatada Gaariyowday, tobankii caruura ahaa baa tobankoodii aabo kala kaxaysteenoo iska daa taa Ilaah baa usakhiray, waana guur-doon waana hooyadeenii berito. Bakayle Tilaabsaday, sababta kaga tilaabisey isagaa la weydiin, caqliga xaguu ka keenayna isagaa sheegi. Waa intaasuu seyntiistihii beriba noqdaaye. Ka sunta tijaabiyay armaa Gaajo ugeysey? Armaa kii ku tijaabiyay walaalkii ahaa? Armaa Raggu Caydh ka dhexeysey? Ii soo Kala Hubso Nuunoow. Candhuufta adkaataa marbey Dhagaxa dhaantaa, xagee Lagu kibroo Cadhuufaha iyo Xariir-la-moodka la barkadaa? Kabbaha barkashadooda waa dawakhaad badan yihiin. Kadaloobka socod laga dhigtaa mijuhuu uroon yahoo waa halkaanu raggeenu mijaha quruxda badan ee mugdi-kanuurka kala nimee, waa cosmeticgii berito. rag kadaloom isku laayaa wax isma yeelaan. Naag Ninkii furtey dhaqaalaheey ku roontoo mar haddii caanihii sicirkoodu kacay, waa in ninka ama caruurtu midkood KA-BUL! yidhaahdaaye. Kol hadday Caydhu ninka ka war hayn, dee waa yeelkiisoo labada Caruurtaa lacagta reerka soo gashoo Caydhu siisaaye. Koob iyo tobankii saxanee bariiska ahaa waa in mid la baajiyaayoo toban saxan caruurta loogu tuuraaye, Armaanu taa beri Maaliyada udhiibnaa? Dhurwaagii matagga budtaacay armuu meydka Gar-xumadii lagu dilay ka naxay? Armuu macluul, jiidh iyo meel Cantuugada ku wanaagsan ka waayay? Armaa Dirxigu Isaga isaga dhaqaaqoo, halaqsan kari waayay? Guur Mas'alo waa guurka ugu wanaagsan haddaad kala boodanna awalba isma eydan aqoon, hadduu hirgalana waa Ajar Allo. Mijo-Digaag Karaaciinkeey dhaamaan, Mijo Digaag madaxeey uroonyiin, Mijo Digaag Vitamiin "Ala Fartuna Dela Costa" sidii Calankii usidtaan. Bukkaan caafimaaday waa in la toogtaa, si loo hubbiyo inuu buko. Waa warkii Wasaarada Caafimadka Ee Soomaaliya. BBC London. Anigoo Taxi kaxaynkara Mcdonal roodhi u gooy-gooyn kara ama Single-Mother helaya maxaa Cilmi iisoo arkey? Waa danaheeni berito. Aafo Loo Alla-Baryi tegey beriiska halkay ka keentay hala weydiiyo. Subcis lagu tuntay Shukaansi ma Gallaa? Yaanyuur xishootay Caqiibo daradaadeey la yaabtay. Illaahow Dhagar-Xumo Ha nagu dilin. Noloshu yaab badanaa!

1. If staying in a haunted house, women should investigate any strange noises wearing their most revealing underwear. 2. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St Patrick's Day parade - at any time of the year. 3. All beds have special L-shaped top sheets that reach up to armpit level on a woman but only waist level on the man lying beside her. 4. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread. 5. It's easy for anyone to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down. 6. Once applied, lipstick will never rub off - even while scuba diving. 7. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty. 8. Should you wish to pass yourself off as a German officer, it will not be necessary to speak the language. A German accent will do. 9. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris. 10. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds. 11. When paying for a taxi, never look at your wallet as you take out a note - just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare. 12. If you lose a hand, it will cause the stump of your arm to grow by 15cm. 13. During all police investigations, it will be necessary to visit a strip club at least once. 14. Mothers routinely cook eggs, bacon and waffles for their family every morning, even though the husband and children never have time to eat them. 15. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames. 16. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium. 17. Medieval peasants had perfect teeth. 18. All single women have a cat. 19. Any person waking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant. 20. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one. 21. Creepy music coming from a graveyard should always be closely investigated. 22. Most people keep a scrapbook of newspaper cuttings - especially if any of their family or friends has died in a strange boating accident. 23. It does not matter if you are heavily outnumbered in a fight involved martial arts - your enemies will wait patiently to attack you one by one by dancing around in a threatening manner until you have knocked out their predecessor. 24. During a very emotional confrontation, instead of facing the person you are speaking to, it is customary to stand behind them and talk to their back. 25. When you turn out the light to go to bed, everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish. 26. Dogs always know who's bad and will naturally bark at them. 27. When they are alone, all foreigners prefer to speak English to each other. 28. Rather than wasting bullets, megalomaniacs prefer to kill their arch-enemies using complicated machinery involving fuses, pulley systems, deadly gases, lasers and man eating sharks that will allow their captives at least 20 minutes to escape. 29. Having a job of any kind will make all fathers forget their son's eighth birthday. 30. Many musical instruments - especially wind instruments and accordions - can be played without moving the fingers. 31. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they're going to go off. 32. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting. 33. Make-up can safely be worn to bed without smudging. 34. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty. 35. If you decide to start dancing in the street, everyone you bump into will know all the steps. AH! God bless America (I Looooooooooooooooove My TV)

Me DAMN IT!

Me DAMN IT!!!