Just cuz i dissed you in Rap or Reap....u mad? Man this is a story i wrote....an open mic give props when its due...or critize it....but anywayz I need some critism...so i could improve my writings

Just cuz i dissed you in Rap or Reap....u mad? Man this is a story i wrote....an open mic give props when its due...or critize it....but anywayz I need some critism...so i could improve my writings

Just cuz i dissed you in Rap or Reap....u mad? Man this is a story i wrote....an open mic give props when its due...or critize it....but anywayz I need some critism...so i could improve my writings

Just cuz i dissed you in Rap or Reap....u mad? Man this is a story i wrote....an open mic give props when its due...or critize it....but anywayz I need some critism...so i could improve my writings

YEa life is short Nice pieces brothers and sisters I will leave ya'll wit one of my poems The abundence of hate around like a tail spin ima end up in the ground the sound that pounds ur ears like a hammer life brought this unsuitable manner without the power in my hands life will sink into the depths, like quick sand as we run from our problems and never face our fears we look at life and drown in tears when all seems lost who and what will be found open ur eyes look around as life twists and turns we sit alone and learn so leave me be as i ponder my foul ways and reload the thoughts of pain thru my days

I really liked yo Abstractness Let me do some some 2 .:Rainforest:. Resamblin life, Beautiful but still treaturous./ Silent and save, But olso filled with danger./ Quiet, peacefull, but al by al its still restless./ Dirty and ugly, Filled up with controversial hate./ But still pure, By its inner beauty./ Short but Powerfull

I loved to just scribble and let my mind snap-free For Very few things in my life made me happy.. And when all the stress came on to entrap me.. The pen on the paper was what let the strap free. Caught in a thought, completely distraught-were, the only things keeping my head above water.. But rough waves, they brought-blur, I let that drown my sight For its been a while since I sat down to write............................. Last Night.....I cried. For everything we were, everything we never can be, Every time you love me, every time you can't stand me. For everything I need, everything you deny to me, Every time I listened, every time you lied to me. For everything we shout, everything we never say, everything we feel, everything we don’t display. For everything I treasure, everything you take for granted, all the sweet nothings, never mentioned, never chanted. For every time I don't want to, every time I do anyway, every time I reach out, every time you push my hand away. For every time I was faithful, every time you still suspected. Every time I cried, left alone, left neglected. For every time I had a comeback, every time you raised your hand, Every time that I explained, and you couldn’t understand. For every time I waited up, and every time you never came, Every time I was the victim, but every time I was to blame. For every time I was hopeful, every time you proved me wrong, Every time I sang the words, of another sad song. For every time I was scared, every time you left me crying. Every time I smiled, but inside I was dying. For every time you crossed the line, and every time I ask me are you black. All the instances of love that need the qualities we lack. Every insult struck a nerve, every grin and bitter word, Every thing that I’ve put up with, everything I don’t deserve. I realize now, though it took a lot of trying.. I’m ready to move on..I’m ready to stop crying. ..This might have seemed simplistic to some, but its about as real as it gets for me right now..When I first wrote it, it didnt even rhyme..Just a big mess of self-recovery.......Maybe someone enjoyed it.

Really Conceited Piece..lol I loved it

Fascinating The 9 men were u used methaphorbic.................INterestin Piece sister U should check my Open Mic called Why Me In poetry Section

Aight some shit i wrote!! have you ever loved a girl and thought that she loved you just as much?????? have you ever kissed a girl that could take away ya pain with just a touch?????? have you ever thought that you would stay with her forever if you were givin' the chance?????? and then one night found out...that she was ****in' kissin' ya man!!!!!! I'm not a jealous man...so instead of being pissed I'm wishin' him luck... but I have a feeling that love will turn to violence when this relationship turns from a kiss to a **** ... I'm about to be givin' it up...because I'm gettin' tired of life... tired of strife...sometimez I feel like pluckin' out my eye with a knife... I got a dead end job...bussin' tablez while the other employeez are pissin' on me... I go to work like I ain't got enough problemz at home when my own fam is dissin' on me... "Ilyas...you're just a deadbeat High school drop out with no class"... I wanna go back to sellin' weed cause bussing tablez for 5 months has got me no cash... I remember back in the day...I used to have respect in Toronto...now... I'm in San Diego...as a busboy while the other employeez talk to me while lookin' down... sometimez I feel as if I'm shit outta luck like cancer patients... I can't get a girl...how I look as a 19 year old nigga usin' a buspass as transportation... if you ask me how I been...I'ma say "chillin'' although shit isn't good... all these little rich white kidz I work with just look at me as some ****** kid from the hood... I got myself a job...with a girl that's goin' be ****in' my friend... every time I try to do somethin' good I end up gettin' ****ed in the end... Critism

Aight some shit i wrote!! have you ever loved a girl and thought that she loved you just as much?????? have you ever kissed a girl that could take away ya pain with just a touch?????? have you ever thought that you would stay with her forever if you were givin' the chance?????? and then one night found out...that she was ****in' kissin' ya man!!!!!! I'm not a jealous man...so instead of being pissed I'm wishin' him luck... but I have a feeling that love will turn to violence when this relationship turns from a kiss to a **** ... I'm about to be givin' it up...because I'm gettin' tired of life... tired of strife...sometimez I feel like pluckin' out my eye with a knife... I got a dead end job...bussin' tablez while the other employeez are pissin' on me... I go to work like I ain't got enough problemz at home when my own fam is dissin' on me... "Ilyas...you're just a deadbeat High school drop out with no class"... I wanna go back to sellin' weed cause bussing tablez for 5 months has got me no cash... I remember back in the day...I used to have respect in Toronto...now... I'm in San Diego...as a busboy while the other employeez talk to me while lookin' down... sometimez I feel as if I'm shit outta luck like cancer patients... I can't get a girl...how I look as a 19 year old nigga usin' a buspass as transportation... if you ask me how I been...I'ma say "chillin'' although shit isn't good... all these little rich white kidz I work with just look at me as some ****** kid from the hood... I got myself a job...with a girl that's goin' be ****in' my friend... every time I try to do somethin' good I end up gettin' ****ed in the end... Critism

Aight some shit i wrote!! have you ever loved a girl and thought that she loved you just as much?????? have you ever kissed a girl that could take away ya pain with just a touch?????? have you ever thought that you would stay with her forever if you were givin' the chance?????? and then one night found out...that she was ****in' kissin' ya man!!!!!! I'm not a jealous man...so instead of being pissed I'm wishin' him luck... but I have a feeling that love will turn to violence when this relationship turns from a kiss to a **** ... I'm about to be givin' it up...because I'm gettin' tired of life... tired of strife...sometimez I feel like pluckin' out my eye with a knife... I got a dead end job...bussin' tablez while the other employeez are pissin' on me... I go to work like I ain't got enough problemz at home when my own fam is dissin' on me... "Ilyas...you're just a deadbeat High school drop out with no class"... I wanna go back to sellin' weed cause bussing tablez for 5 months has got me no cash... I remember back in the day...I used to have respect in Toronto...now... I'm in San Diego...as a busboy while the other employeez talk to me while lookin' down... sometimez I feel as if I'm shit outta luck like cancer patients... I can't get a girl...how I look as a 19 year old nigga usin' a buspass as transportation... if you ask me how I been...I'ma say "chillin'' although shit isn't good... all these little rich white kidz I work with just look at me as some ****** kid from the hood... I got myself a job...with a girl that's goin' be ****in' my friend... every time I try to do somethin' good I end up gettin' ****ed in the end... Critism

Aight some shit i wrote!! have you ever loved a girl and thought that she loved you just as much?????? have you ever kissed a girl that could take away ya pain with just a touch?????? have you ever thought that you would stay with her forever if you were givin' the chance?????? and then one night found out...that she was ****in' kissin' ya man!!!!!! I'm not a jealous man...so instead of being pissed I'm wishin' him luck... but I have a feeling that love will turn to violence when this relationship turns from a kiss to a **** ... I'm about to be givin' it up...because I'm gettin' tired of life... tired of strife...sometimez I feel like pluckin' out my eye with a knife... I got a dead end job...bussin' tablez while the other employeez are pissin' on me... I go to work like I ain't got enough problemz at home when my own fam is dissin' on me... "Ilyas...you're just a deadbeat High school drop out with no class"... I wanna go back to sellin' weed cause bussing tablez for 5 months has got me no cash... I remember back in the day...I used to have respect in Toronto...now... I'm in San Diego...as a busboy while the other employeez talk to me while lookin' down... sometimez I feel as if I'm shit outta luck like cancer patients... I can't get a girl...how I look as a 19 year old nigga usin' a buspass as transportation... if you ask me how I been...I'ma say "chillin'' although shit isn't good... all these little rich white kidz I work with just look at me as some ****** kid from the hood... I got myself a job...with a girl that's goin' be ****in' my friend... every time I try to do somethin' good I end up gettin' ****ed in the end... Critism

Ok time to attack someone SMokey..lol This kid couldn't come correct if he went to grammar school for ejaculation/ He likes playin' with himself obviously It shows he's into virtual masturbation/ Watch me attack your patience Make you admit word of defeat/ This is the net You don't get Southern Hospitality for Disturbin' Tha Peace/ He likes haduuken's and shadow punches So expect his punchlines to come mysteriously/ Named himself after a Movie (smokey) So Imma keep Smokin' around and not take him seriously LOL i was bored...........

Ok time to attack someone SMokey..lol This kid couldn't come correct if he went to grammar school for ejaculation/ He likes playin' with himself obviously It shows he's into virtual masturbation/ Watch me attack your patience Make you admit word of defeat/ This is the net You don't get Southern Hospitality for Disturbin' Tha Peace/ He likes haduuken's and shadow punches So expect his punchlines to come mysteriously/ Named himself after a Movie (smokey) So Imma keep Smokin' around and not take him seriously LOL i was bored...........

Ok time to attack someone SMokey..lol This kid couldn't come correct if he went to grammar school for ejaculation/ He likes playin' with himself obviously It shows he's into virtual masturbation/ Watch me attack your patience Make you admit word of defeat/ This is the net You don't get Southern Hospitality for Disturbin' Tha Peace/ He likes haduuken's and shadow punches So expect his punchlines to come mysteriously/ Named himself after a Movie (smokey) So Imma keep Smokin' around and not take him seriously LOL i was bored...........

Is a Keystyle 1 More Time..... What Is It Today, like Being Hip Hop Orientated Is Rare Busta Ill Freestyle, Hear The Austounded Statements And Stares You Say Were AllMost There? Shit, How Much Longer And You Still Say Hip Hop Will Keep Growin And Get Stronger? Are You Insane? I Must Say, That My Mind States On Elevation Like A Closet Drug Addict, I Have To Stay Rappin Out The Basement Id Love To See The Faces, When I Rhyme And Cause Amazement HipHops Goin To Hell In A HandBasket And Im Goin On A Picnic Wit Satan If I Got Shot In The Jaw, Would I Fall Or Rise To The Top Like When 50 Got Popped..Now U Can Buy "G-Unit Bullet Proof Vests" In The Mall Too Bad For Most, They Dont Sell Skillz At WallMart, I Hope They Dont Start Cuz All These Herbs Are Rippin My Cultures Walls Apart This Is A KeyStyle, I Hope You Like..No Wait.. I Dont If I Wrote 300 Ill Tracks Id Still Get No Play So I Wont.... Reality.........

Mswords still droppin Flamez wow! deadly nice shit TIme fo me to drop some heat Im the judge and jury- of complex context since CANIBUS is already steady on active duty- **** the club **** the bluberry PLUS platinum jewelry- that foolery is for tv and chuck woolery. I aint got 50 CENTZ in my pocket or a mil on debit….. I AINT PULLING HOES CAUSE I GOT DOE ON WELFARE CREDIT-CASH MONEY!!!!!!!!!!!! forget it!!!!!!! LIL WAYNE’S LAST CD regret it. I thought PLATINUM meant the finer things. they still wear the same bling with the same size rim rings. 22 k~g’s- don’t mean nothing if you cant sell 22 c~d’s- yall nigguz sound like fem hype mens for EMINEM and you call your self m.c.’s you just feminen with some testies- replacing your ovaries-and your flow as how as polar degree. Then there’s MURDER INC-JA callen out 50- saying he can see son but cant see his career ending. Befrieneding DMX –sending his mind into the X vortex- sounding like a ***** doing R&B cause now he getting gay sex. Plus he got the PAC complex but not concepts cause he cant flow- still talken shit to the west he aboute to serve on DEATH ROW. And im old and new school…i ever dropped out-but graduated to ripping m.c.’s mouths. So what ima do is take 7 consinents-and you them constent to rip you through 7 continents. Utilizing the BLUEPRINT for STILLMATTIC- and wage beafs with the number 2 led skillcraft automatic. Remember BIG AND PACS beaf now we on the streets where it gets tragic.

HAhahahaha this fools will never give up why yall coming with these long *** verses Mindstate that shit dont make sense...lol Aight look... I know ya like my name... But thats another type of being hard/ I am about to show Mindstate how to address a Father's Day card/ We know its coming... thats why we turn our heads when you spit/ Verses of bullshit... Beating you to the punch faster than the kid who spiked it/ Saying u ILL??? Cause even with my help your battles aint sick/ Pathetic dick... I knew you were wack when you tried posting text on soundclick/lol Constant PM's to me... asking for favors... you aint my dog... just a pup/ The alphabet's shrinking dun down to 25 cause Supa just ate U up/ ******* herb's reality is flawed... after all that alias lost to youngblood/ ***** State yo Mind cuz is so wack he couldnt get airplay joining the mile-high club/ Thats called a direct diss Yea check out my site www.urbanspitz.tk WE got Audio battles if u got a mic and many more

HAhahahaha this fools will never give up why yall coming with these long *** verses Mindstate that shit dont make sense...lol Aight look... I know ya like my name... But thats another type of being hard/ I am about to show Mindstate how to address a Father's Day card/ We know its coming... thats why we turn our heads when you spit/ Verses of bullshit... Beating you to the punch faster than the kid who spiked it/ Saying u ILL??? Cause even with my help your battles aint sick/ Pathetic dick... I knew you were wack when you tried posting text on soundclick/lol Constant PM's to me... asking for favors... you aint my dog... just a pup/ The alphabet's shrinking dun down to 25 cause Supa just ate U up/ ******* herb's reality is flawed... after all that alias lost to youngblood/ ***** State yo Mind cuz is so wack he couldnt get airplay joining the mile-high club/ Thats called a direct diss Yea check out my site www.urbanspitz.tk WE got Audio battles if u got a mic and many more

HAhahahaha this fools will never give up why yall coming with these long *** verses Mindstate that shit dont make sense...lol Aight look... I know ya like my name... But thats another type of being hard/ I am about to show Mindstate how to address a Father's Day card/ We know its coming... thats why we turn our heads when you spit/ Verses of bullshit... Beating you to the punch faster than the kid who spiked it/ Saying u ILL??? Cause even with my help your battles aint sick/ Pathetic dick... I knew you were wack when you tried posting text on soundclick/lol Constant PM's to me... asking for favors... you aint my dog... just a pup/ The alphabet's shrinking dun down to 25 cause Supa just ate U up/ ******* herb's reality is flawed... after all that alias lost to youngblood/ ***** State yo Mind cuz is so wack he couldnt get airplay joining the mile-high club/ Thats called a direct diss Yea check out my site www.urbanspitz.tk WE got Audio battles if u got a mic and many more