Originally posted by Valentino: Also delete everything that was good from your mind and focus on all the litle stuff that irritated you about the other person and in no time you will wonder whatever made you choose that person. hope that helps. This is re-writing history; she did choose him for a reason! What was good about him is still good about him regardless of her focus. Focusing on irritations whilst ignoring his good as a way of demonising him inorder to get over him will only get her to a place where she questions her own self and judgement- and now everybody's wrong and bad. May be it's not necessary to question it that deeply. Moving on entails accepting everything as it was: the good, the bad and the ugly. Bittersweet takes some getting used to. An important part of getting over someone is getting over yourself. Don't indulge; go do something altruistic. U're in a certain state of mind; it's not fixed, it's not uncontrollable and it's not misery ever after.

OMG, Ngonge is in the house. War have u been in Asia yourself? Thanks, but I'll pass on the python show-off although I do have a snake on the head pic from Malaysia- small slithery bugger; it wasn't fun but it was memorable. I'm hardly in any photos anyway. Far more interesting sights to capture. what's that ridiculous advertising?? no respect for art, I tell you Valenteenah, u're welcome. Inshallah, next week, more on the stunning scenery. I can't fathom paradise when earthly spots can be so awe-inspiring. Dabshid, Maf Kees thanks. Zafir, yes they do partake of the cannine flesh in Vietnam. I learned the word for dog, cat and pork so I didn't inadvertently wash them down with sugarcane juice(as u do). In Ho Chi Min city on a bicycle rickshaw(never ever do this in Ho Chi Minh; it is near-death on their roads), I smelled something in the air(I am a smell freak), cast my eye about the shops we were cycling by(well, he was cycling, I was sweating) and caught sight of a puppy, hanging upside down and skinned. It really was oouucc-inspiring. I have seen deep-fried rat but not in Vietnam- think the fish in fish and chips only rat shaped. It was a night market and when I pointed it out to the group of people I was having dinner with- people I met there- they point blank refused to believe it was a rat(sorry, it was layer over layer of deep-fried rat, forming stacks like wine bottles). I had to hover a finger over the nose, over the back and down the slope of the long tail of one specimen before they realised. Dinner bubbled up in some of us, hehe. CG, haha, my passport's got more stamps than yours, deal with it. Northerner, inshallah I will. WaterLily, I always fantasised about SE Asia when I was a girl; I just made the dream come true. It was never unusual in my head. Yo, the food I had in Vietnam was OUT OF THIS WORLD. I ate and ate and ate. The Vietnamese love their food; the thought and consideration that went into food preparation was consistently good across establishments regardless of price. As one Vietnamese said every time we sat down for food: Sister, ATTACK!! Loved him, he was awesome. So respectful, considerate- he wouldn't eat any meat as I wasn't; he only ate what I could and coerced me into eating far more than I thought possible and kept introducing me to new food possibilities. What a man he was. Nearly midnight, wish I could add more. Next time, the scenery, the obsession with outward appearance(by women of women), my obsession with Vietnamese coffee, the marriage proposals, the food, the hospitality of the people, the beaches, the coffee, the food, the coffee, the food, the coffee, the food..bedtime.... , I'm hungry. Growl looks like my pics may disappear, anybody recommend a free upload site that means FREE?

CG, u want tips, all u gotta do is ask. ThePoint, Vietnam has had many names, 'Nam' which means south is one part of the changing name that has appeared often. Viet Nam: the south occupied by the Viet(main ethnic group). The GIs were too occupied with the women to care why they called it Nam. The men I saw were far more beautiful than the women, never seen so many pretty boys ever or since.

From my memoirs with some photos.. I've spent the last few days in Hoi An, an enchanting town that is a UNESCO Heritage Site. The morning I arrived there, I had to wait downstairs with the hotel people while my room was been checked out of. A coffee appeared from somewhere and everybody gathered round me. After the usual questions, one woman who couldn't understand English came at me from behind(I was sitting), hugged and rocked me. I was so taken aback. Beautiful she said, beautiful. 3 more women and the old man who ran the place said the same. One girl said she wanted to be like me! The Vietnamese women are very concerened with appearance. Would u believe they staighten their hair with straightening creams?? Later when I wore the only clean clothes I had(the Kashmiri kameez), the same woman caught me coming down the stairs. She beamed and did a little excited dance on the spot. She then took me in her arms and hugged me hard. She said the B word again. Again I was surprised. I left to wander the streets and caused something of a stir. Beautiful girl, no boyfriend? I wish u luck in love they say. Bloody need it too. LOL. What do u think? A Vietnamese guy? They seem willing enough. I don't know who they are but they beckoned me into their shop and posed. What was I to do? At breakfast one morning, sitting in the shade outside a cafe I took: Flowers been sold by a seller walking the streets. Approaching Hoi An by boat. I spent a lovely day floating, eating sea food on the boat and watching locals build boats. Oh and I was wandering around Hoi on the first evening when I suddenly found myself in the middle of a carnival. It was the annual August festival and on the night of the full moon. Suddenly I was in the middle of crowds of people, children carrying lanterns and candles, monks, floats and fires burning and dreamy, dreamy, stuff..straight out of a fairy tale. It was absolutely charming, and enchanting. The river-side was lined with lanterns of every colour and people came from all over to eat and be merry under a full moon. Marvellous. for Ahura; girl I'm knackered now but it's the only ngiht until next week I'm free, enjoy. It's only the tip of 'Nam

Originally posted by Northerner: So come on, trawl through what you have on your PC and cameras and post the one picture that means more to you than the others. Explain the significance of that one picture, where it was taken and why you took it. Great idea, Northerner. I like uchi's the most so far though, uchi, where's the meaning behind it? Valenteenah, I have drool-for pictures like some have drool. I'll start another thread at some point with a story entertwined. I have a whole bunch of my pics doing the rounds at work currently. Being at these places is far more enjoyable than the pics. I have cried on hills, rivers, lakes, valleys, beaches, seas(from the oouucc) at dawn, dusk and every moment inbetween. My time in Vietnam is one of my greatest pleasures. Sniff

Sorry I laughed at that too. But I'm not evil, really. I break out into a cold sweat over smaller things, don't mind me. I thought a plane I was in once was going to crash. The ooucc-factor was off the scale. LoL.

..and she was one of the more with-it ones..I could have gotten away with claiming Martian ancestry and made up diabolical Home Office experience stories(that weren't that far from the truth).

^ I do beg your pardon. I followed to the T the few rules Northerner put forward; there was nothing to define size until u suggested a preference. I have already said I will abide by your recommendation- consdiering all that and that my picture is not even the largest on display u are exaggerating the unintended rule break of a rule that didn't exist. U can't cry foul cause the picture is nice. :cool: off to shrink

^All men suffer from this delusion(sublime skills) whatever language they try and articulate it in. Teehee. Say you're an Englishman in the Gulf- that'll see to the Arab/non-Arab debate.

LooL. I have a cup of mint tea ready, go on.

Hey Northerner, it's about the quality of the photos and what they mean to us, bro. I have far more exquisite landscape shots but there's not necessarily a story attached to them that means something to me. Even Wembley is exotic to some- unfortunately not to me, been there, harrassed out, lol. I will shrink my lil friends to 500 by something, LSK.

^u, expat, u. I watch the inflight entertainment when flying, I think I did 4 movies back to back once. Don't u ever get asked about your ethnicity at work? I'm usually asked- people claim they can't nail me- and that starts off a conversation. They always return for more; never worked anywhere where they didn't know of my Somaliness. One woman overheard me once on my mobile and asked if I was speaking French. One lecturer spit his food out when I told him I was Somali; I stared at the egg-spalttered table while he tried to regain his composure. He mentioned something about the violence(this is way back) in the country; no doubt he freaked out realising a blood-thirsty Somali was in his midst and not an affable Malay(I'm not even fair enough for this confusion). I don't feel like I have a double life but that's probably cause my life outside work is as Somali-free as my life at work. Work that out. Anywho, should get the book; all I'll need then is somewhere to fly to(any excuse, I tell ya).

where: in middle of nowhere in the middle of Vietnam why(from my memoirs): the children gathered round me and I asked all their names. Just as I was about to leave one little girl ran to me with a sprig of leaves. She held it to her nose and held it up to me. I smelled the leaves. Lemon! I'd been craving lemon leaves since I'd popped one into my mouth the first day. I chewed on the leaf. The flavour exploded in my mouth, fresh and invogorating. The girl tipped her head back and squeezed her lips into a kiss. I bent down and we exchanged loud kisses. A little boy, jealous of the attention ran to the lemon tree and returned with a whole branch. How did they know? It's my favourite, I said to Sinh. I stood there feeling giddy and free. I became aware of my mental state, almost as though I'd stepped outside of my self. So this was happiness! I'd forgotten. when.. I fell in love. sigh

Ryan Air currently has a sale on. Ends on Monday 17th July for travel during September, October and November. It appears to be mainly mid-week travel and there are blackout periods; still worth a look. I found a return flight to Seville, Monday 11th September- Thursday 14th September for £39.66 and this is the only search I did, I'm sure cheaper can be found. I'm tempted by a pre-Ramadan nose-around Andalucia. Drool. Ryan Air This where the flights go: Ryan Air Destinations

Classic SOL. Classic.

Love the pics, thanks.

^Back in Blighty? Bro, that's what they call a synopsis, well done, thanks for the recommendation. I will get it though I seem to read little these days.

^120 each walaa..?

Thanks, WaterLily.

^Hey, I'm flying by; here's a lil nacnac: U can borrow money, steal it or earn it. U didn't put any conditions on your 'how'. If u're serious about the travel I can try and help with the budget. I can't, OK, won't lend u the money; it tastes better when u earn and spend your own; also why retire? Do something that doesn't require retiring from. no I am not on drugs

^cutting is still falling out. See yr Doc gal. And stop worrying, stress can lead to hair loss.

^ lol u don't know the meaning of cruel. I went out the other day afterall. The next day I spent at home making some money on a side project. Tonight I continue to so. I don't have the time to entertain myself here. When I do, I will nacnac away. I might even demonstrate cruelty if u're lucky.

^I never suggested anyone was here for my entertainment. This is a community and nothing of consequence happens unless there is contribution from as many as possible. When I have the time I seek entertainment by posting regularly. A lot of the time what I say is far more entertaining to me than what others do( ); I try not to wait for what I want but make it happen. I was hoping to kick-start something, anything; a reminder. The summer holiday thing is an excuse. Just how many are doing something of consequence or life-changing? I suppose u either have a sense of communal responsibility or u don't; being a part of something and not contributing is farcical; some do that all year round, summer or not. I'm merely pointing it out; if it's painful for some to read, it is for them to reflect. You are right that I am a part of this too; I barely have had time to read let alone contribute lately. Today I have some chill-out time at home. I will see what I can do. Wakey, wakey sleepy head and see u there.

Originally posted by Sakhar: Sheh, thanks for the link! However I've to point out, that you did not understand the essence of my post! From 'Sakhar, read this', u understand that I did not understand the essence of your post? Wala qhariib.

^Actually yeah, life is fun right now. Listen, when I had the time I did the crime. If more people contributed( even in a small way) this place would be more active. As it stands most people are by-standers just like they are in their own real lives. Even their farts can't be bothered to smell. Mwahaha.