Seven of Nine, Not everyone is excited about driving Late Eighty's Mercedez Benz Model lol. I think this is subjective and depends on an individual's choice(Assuming the two models stand for the age groups). What a man wants out of the relationship(Guurka) determines how he chooses. Some like the maturity that comes with age while others care only about Yaraanta Qofta for some reason of their own.

Seven Of Nine, Abaal Qabka wuxuu ku yimaadaa Qofka markaa u sameysid wuxuusan kaa mudan ama uusan kugu laheyn, Laakiin Ninkaaga wuu kugu leeyahay that you be nice and loving towards him. So whatever you do for him, it is an expected thing. It is typical of Somali women to view treating their husbands nicely and romantically as a weakness. Why is that? I think there is generational difference. The Older the Somali, The more traditional(indifferent to romance), the younger the Somali, the more modern in their outlook of partnership.

Seven Of Nine, Don't worry about these guys. Not all somali men will marry a second wife. Just do your best to be nice and caring as much as you can once you marry. Your man won't look for another woman hopefully. Give him no excuses for another woman.

Baashi I was on the impression that beause of its tough regulations and rules, One was discouraged from being too quick to marry in multiples and that is why the practice(polygamy) was not commonly practiced. Men always showed reservations. Honestly, if my father was to marry a second wife after so many years of marriage to my mother, without any sound justification or need for it, like he has a complaint about her that she is not living up to her wifely responsibilities, I wouldn't be happy about it and I would let him know my sentiments. Good thing that my father is not the type who marries a second wife. The Loyal reer magaaal at-home-type Waaye. I would be fair to him if he had no respect from mom and lived in a difficult relationship. I would understand his plight. But she takes care of him and is the bread winner for the family, So he has no excuse for another wife lol. Anyway, this is not something a man should be too hasty in doing. Let there be a DIRE need for it first. Aeryn Sun Thanks. If you can fall in love, that is all there is to it about the foreswear lol.

Baashi, I will let the girls let their views known. I am gonna watch and see how things develop in here bro. And yes, you argued well for your case lol. Maalin Wanaagsan.

Bro baashi, You could be a lawyer you know that right? A man given to persuasion and cajole! lol. Good for you. I have nothing against the institution of Polygamy per se. There is/are a reason/s for it. At the same time, I don't think it is there for men to just do it at their whims. Don't you think men should be responsible with the option? And If the woman gives her husband whatever he desires, in as much as she can, what else is there to get from another woman? Is it too hard to wait for the week/s she is off? May be pregnancy is an issue for some and they can't wait for months, so they have to go out and marry another one Miyaa? lol. This is putting aside the needs that necessitate a second marriage. NGONGE That is cruelty! When she hits forty is when she gave all her young years to you and served you well. It is like telling her, Gacaliso, Now your body is not as strong as it used to, all the things I came to admire about your physique is somewhat not that attractive, so I am going to get a younger more firm One and I need your blessing for that. Huh, Sounds very nice and fair to me. And you have a sense of humour. That comment of yours about the girls throwing their hats into the ring, and the ring being huge, made me laugh. You are Good.

Yes, Welcome Diamante. LayZieGirl I don't think that is a good idea. Just preach less lol. NOW, THAT IS A GOOD IDEA.

posted by Baashi: Now Xoogsade, things get complicated when u plug few variables in the equation. I'm sure u understand how challenging and frustrated it can be to get the "right" gal/guy. For the gals sometimes the "right" guy happens to be married man :cool: I wouldn't be surprised if the "smart young pettite cuties" with the "right mindset" understand that they have that option if their potential husband-to-be dissappoints them [/QB] Baashi , How challenging and frustrasted one becomes will depend on some factors like Age, social skills and the opportunity to meet the opposites. And these days those who are challenged can go back home and bring one of their own without any difficulties. Other than that, There are more important things in Life than getting frustrated over those challenges of finding The Almost-Perfect partner. Being young and gifted gives ONE solid confidence and less worries, and I believe Guurka calaf waaye. How many planned to marry someone they loved yet ended up marrying someone else they didn't know? La isma wareeriyo in my book. No frustrations Please! lol. They will come knocking the door or I will go knock someone's door lol. Either way will make my goals doable. As for the girls whose "right" man happens to be the married one, I would have my reservations and doubts about them. If I was married, I can accept an expression of fondness or an adulating comment from a girl I am acquinted with, like if she likes my character and hoped to find for herself a man like me, but if she wanted to act on her thoughts about me with disregard to my other existing contract, I would think of it to be strange and unnatural. I would question what drives and motivates her to be that way. Hadii nin la'aan sidaas u Jirto, may be I can understand.

Baashi , I thought Young religious cuties with the healthy mindset are the most eager to go solo with their husbands. With their modern ways of looking at life and wanting to enjoy it to the fullest, I always believed they wouldn't entertain sharing. I am surprised still there exists some having read the comments in this thread. It is Unnatural for a woman to accept willfully the sharing. Their faith must be Iron-clad and unwavering. Which I don't believe that is the case lol. Religious women have the same sentiments nonreligious women have. I also thought polygamy was out of necessity, and one should remain with one if he can't fulfill the conditions required. How can One look in the eye a woman he cares about and tell her, Hey honey, guess what? You gonna share me with heblaayo, your best friend. If there is an excuse, like lack of children after years of Marriage, and She gives her blessing, I can understand. Anyway, MEN who do it are Bold enough to not care about the consequences. They are brave and daring. May be reckless some of them who already failed in their existing marriage. And women who accept it are new breed who, may be, felt times are not as good as they used to, so they must share. I think this makes sense considering the too many girls in the west who are unmarried and seeking good decent men.

2Nine8Five , Exactly, that is the spirit. Oh, and wait a second! I have heard nowadays Women throw the Husband's clothes out for him in a Bac(didn't know it had to be madoow though) late when he comes home. Must be a good choice of colour to scare the poor soul into the night. Hebeloow bacdiisaaa loo tuureyda waa run miyaa? I just remembered these stories after you mentioned bac madoow. I think Nimanka Odayaasha lee in la harowsado laakin. Take Care waan log off gareeyey.

2Nine8Five , Adiga Burjikada canjeerada kuu saaran lee madaxa u geli haduu sheekadaas kuu keno lol. Seriously, these girls are Either Naive(too trusting and hoping for the best), Too religious, or Don't care at all. I thought even being too pious didn't remove a woman's jealousy and eagerness to be reclusive with her husband. But I see a different trend here. Waaba sheeko cusub(and I don't buy it). I am not complaining about that though if it is real. All the better you know. LOL.

2Nine8Five, Nice connection! A best female friend for the husband means the eventual second wife. I see gabdho aan kala jecleen. Fiicanaa.

Xarago , lol@Sheekada-maan-hoosta-kuugu-dhigey. Guulaadan gaarin lama sheegto Abaayo. Ha degdegin. Inteen isku aragney aniga iyo adiga oo aa hoosta iigu dhigtey? Our paths haven't crossed before. My comment was to instill some courage into you and that you be yourself after you said to one of the guys "That you would have made a comment in reply to him but felt afraid". Fuleyinimada was just a comment nothing factual. Hope inaa raalli gelin u baahneen, because it is too difficult for me to give One. And You have your hands full already ee meesha iska dhici. LOL.

Bro OG-MOTI, Inaa baryootantaan diidaayey. Haddii gabdhaha qaar ku fahmi waayaan for whatever reason, Let them be. You are not going to lose anything because of them. You are as important as anyone out there even though some might want you believe otherwise. I actually feel safe when they are on the other side of the Aisle. Like xoolaheena isma daaqaan camal nooh. LOL. Juxa. What do you have against Ugly Women?

Oki bro OG. Sorry about the misunderstanding.

OG-MOTI, Not everyone will understand you and you shouldn't care much about who doesn't. Don't lower yourself.

I thought Somalis had the worst kind of social class ills ---> Tribalism. You can strive to get educated, You can work to get rich to some extent and make Money, but you can't change your tribe once you are condemned by your own society to the lowest ladder of the social class for who your father or your mother is tribewise.

OG-MOTI, It is not Kibir, It is their right to have a say in your conduct once you are married. If you want to do what you want, as you want, and how you want it without factoring in what your wife thinks about what you are about to do, STAY SINGLE.

This is funny topic loool. This is Lovely! "I am not somali" looooooool. Ceeb badanaa. The other Day, this Ethiopian dude who is the MIS guy at our work was telling me the same thing. He said Somali girls like to fool around with Ethiopians even if they are covered conservatively(pantomiming and showing me what he meant by the conservative cover). I laughed at his comment and told him that is because you guys(ethiopians) are for short-term(just for them to get laid) and we(Somalis) are for the long-term(for marriage and being burdened) to which my Ethiopian friend gleefully replied; EXACTLY, with elation and understanding. I made that comment for lack of a better reply. If I believed he was lying, I would have confronted him, but knowing for sure that he was telling the truth, well, What else could I say? OR IN MY CASE, WHO CARES. He knew I didn't care and would be cool about it in the first place. I don't get concerned or worry much about this trend. Not because I go out with a nonsomali woman or plan to and I am excusing what these girls are doing. But I came to learn to not care. My philososphy is, Women are all the same and what differentiates them is the culture of Islam right? I mean, isn't that the reason we gravitate towards our own although there are other women who are as beautiful as them Somali women or Better(in the case of Blonds lol)? Just for the culture? So it follows, If a somali woman does the same things a nonmuslim woman does, to me, the Somali girl lost whatever special status she held. Blood relationship has no value in this case. About time Somali guys abondoned calool jileeca. The Motto should be: Aniga lee ha isoo marin hadhoow and do as you wish.

by Professor.: Though not perfect as a guage by any means, those I meet with PhDs tend to be higher in class than those who don't. Yes, there are exceptions, but it works by and large. Education seems to be a part. This has been my experience as well. I don't know about the PhD level, but The engineers I work with have better understanding and respect than the rest of the workers who never attended any college. I like their confidence and ways of crisis handling, the less blame-game, and the high standard they hold themselves to. I admire the way they respect people Mostly. Ignorance is darkness. Hope I haven't digressed from the topic.

I think the Answer should be No because of the risks involved. Is there a man who would let his wife have a best male friend? Some justifiable relationships do exist such as professional relationship and work related contacts or group-work, but I would suspect if normal friendship between a married woman and another man can be justified in the eyes of most men. For that, it would be fair for the men to not do the same. If the friend of the opposite sex is someone you grew up with, then the relationship can be considered more than just mere friendship, more like brother/sisterhood, and I think such situation wouldn't cause any problems provided the spouse knows the other person and the history behind the two people knowing each other. The wife's happiness is more important always than friendship. And Just because one is married, doesn't mean they will stop being human if they find themselves in compromising situations. The best female friend can be the eventual second wife.

Nice pictures. Thanks.

Lander-Girl, The website you refer to was fun with the exception of foul-mouthed people. It was fast paced and entertaining(at least for me) if you could find your niche. It was a website for both serious and Not so serious people. SOL in contrast, is strictly for professionals and clean I think. This looks like a place one can recommend to nonmuslim friends who are curious about Somalis. And Each website has its Own values and use. Xarago. It is not like you gonna die if you get banned. You will find good use for your time I assure you. Biiqnimada iska dhaaf.

Classique, Thanks for the info. IL CAPO marqaanaa haayey aan u maleenaa markuu sheekada soo qorey. Like they say in that situation: "Wey ka tustey nooh".

Classique, Is there a newspaper called Al-Facshir in UAE? The name sounds like a tabloid newspaper designed for gossip and exposure of those who are caught doing some dirty deeds. Ceebteena alaha asturo iyo tan muslinkabo.