Horn waxaan ula yaabeynin, markii lala dagaalay Qeybdiid, I had difficult time explaining to my relatives that their clan wasn't under attack. I was shocked at the reaction displayed by the most educated members in our family how personal they took the war when certain Muqdisho radios announced reer hebel are being routed out of Muqdisho today. Marka, qof soomaali ah waxaan loola yaabi karin, qabiilkaa lafaha ka galay no matter how much schooling they have done. Waxaa u daran oo kaliya ninka madaxda ah iyo kan inadeerkii ah ee dhinac taagan laakiin ka fikrad duwan iyo xukun jacayl waalli ah. Dad tipo talyaani ahaa, oo very secular ahaa, oo weligood qori qaadanin aa caadifad qabiil gashay markii radiyowyada ay ka maqleen qabiilkoodaa hilfaha loo laabay. Kismayo cidna lagama xigo qabiilkuu doono ha ahaado, Xamar cidna lagama xigo qabiilkuu doono ha ahaado, Siyaasaddaan reer hebelaa meeshaan iska leh shalay ka billaabatay koonfurta. Gedo was the first place which gave refuge to all somalis who didn't want to participate in the civil war ilaa niman qabiilka Gedo ka dhashay amxaaro kusoo hoggaamiyaan qabiilkoodii iyo soomaalidii kaloo meesha degganaa. Horn diinta si fiicanuu u yaqaanaa sida ka muuqatay hadalladiisa, cilmi adduunyana kuma yaro, haddana qabiilkaa ka xoog badan oo wuxuu u hadlaa sida nin dulman oo kale. La yaab waaye. Qofka caqliga leh, qabiilllada soomalida makala xigsado, your qabiil should be the group of somalis who serve the interests of islam and country. It is that simple.

The article had me laughing for a while. I had no idea such unschooled beings came from Somalia with such twisted culture as to beat a wife to express love. I heard once a story about a man who was sent to some southern town in Wamo areas. He got married from the locals and went about his normal business without beating his wife the first night. The wife herself complained to her family about the new husband not loving her because he didn't beat her the first night. This article proves such culture existed indeed. As for the ladies dialing 911, sometimes it is necessary to call. However, many somalis do misunderstand the purpose of such service and call 911 for a mere verbal dispute.

All About America in 3 Days Dogs are treated like people, money flows and life is easy. Or is it? U.S.-bound Somalian refugees get a crash course in survival. By Edmund Sanders, Times Staff Writer September 12, 2006 KAKUMA, Kenya — They had learned how to buy bus tokens and clip coupons. Gotten hands-on training for lighting a gas stove and flushing a toilet. Taken a pop quiz on women's rights. But for a group of U.S.-bound Somalian immigrants taking a three-day crash course on life in America recently, one topic by far stirred the most buzz: snow. Staring at pictures of snow-covered roofs and hearing stories about waking up to find a frontyard covered in white, the Somalis (who'd rarely felt temperatures below 60 degrees) peppered the instructor with questions. "How do I save my family from this … snow?" asked Hassan Mohammed Abrone, 41, a father of two who was already trying to embrace the American lifestyle by wearing a Statue of Liberty baseball cap and a pair of secondhand Nike Airs. After hearing a description of coats, scarves, gloves and long underwear, another student, Lelya Yussuf, 23, asked: "How can we walk while wearing all that? Isn't it too heavy?" In an effort to explain snow to people who have never seen it, the instructor asked students to imagine how it would feel to live inside a refrigerator. But the analogy fell flat for some, because they'd never heard of such an appliance. "This job takes a lot of patience," instructor Abdullahinur Sheik Kassim said. "You can't take anything for granted." For the Somalis in this northern Kenya refugee camp, passing a class in America 101 is the final hurdle to boarding airplanes for new lives. As they fly toward the United States, they will learn for the first time where their new homes will be. A speed-read through American culture, the U.S.-mandated class tries to prepare them for what they will find when they arrive. It covers everything from mini-malls and microwaves to same-sex marriage. For most of the students, ranging in age from 4 to 65, it's a steep learning curve. They've spent much of their lives fleeing Somalia's 15-year civil war, scrambling to survive in the bush or toiling in squalid refugee camps. Most come from persecuted ethnic groups and clans, such as the Bantu or Ashraf, that were the first to lose what little property they had after the collapse of Mohamed Siad Barre's regime in 1991. Now those same injustices have made them eligible to escape to the United States. The cultural orientation class is one of hundreds given each year in Africa by the International Organization for Migration, or IOM, one of the world's largest refugee-assistance groups, which organizes the class with funding from the U.S. State Department. Such programs began in the 1970s for Southeast Asian refugees heading to the United States. Back then, immigrants spent months at transition camps, learning the English language and American customs before entering the country. Over the years, budget cuts have pruned the orientation program to less than a week. "In just three days, there is not a lot that we can realistically do," said Pindie Stephen, the group's regional coordinator for the classes in Kenya. "All we can do is plant the seeds of values and concepts they will encounter later. And we try to dispel myths, because so much of what they learn is from the rumor mill." Refugees often believe that life in the U.S. will be easy, that they will live in big homes with cars and television sets. Such descriptions come from relatives in America who sometimes exaggerate their prosperity, or from the U.S.-made TV movies occasionally shown inside refugee camps. "I know all about America," said Amal Nuradia, 27. "I've seen the Hallmark Channel." She is among the thousands of Somalian refugees at Kakuma, most of whom fled their country more than a decade ago. More than 12,000 have resettled in the U.S. in recent years. "What do you know about America?" Kassim asked at the beginning of a recent orientation class. Students yelled out their answers: It's a superpower. People are always in a hurry. Neighbors don't talk to each other. Dogs are treated like people. Gay people get married. All children go to school. With only 15 hours of class, Kassim wasted no time, covering U.S. history in less than 90 seconds. George Washington was the first president. Abraham Lincoln freed the slaves. Martin Luther King Jr. marched for civil rights. Time for the next subject. Much of the curriculum is based on feedback from recent immigrants. For example, when new immigrants complained about being bewildered by the modern conveniences of a typical American home, IOM built a fully functioning kitchen and bathroom at the back of one classroom. Long flights to the U.S. were so traumatic that a video was added about airplanes, from lavatories to airsickness bags. Somalian Bantu, who were historically treated like slaves by other groups and lived in mud huts in the bush without water or electricity, usually know little of modern society, needing instruction on such basic tasks as flipping light switches or turning doorknobs. Other students are from more developed urban centers, such as Mogadishu, the Somalian capital, but even they have limited exposure to sights such as skyscrapers, freeways or elevators, and their children have been largely raised on the run or inside refugee camps. Sensing the students' anxiety about snow, Kassim spent the next hour explaining U.S. weather. In their textbooks, students read about the importance of punctuality and Americans' "obsession" with cleanliness. Of the 25 students, only one spoke English, so Kassim practiced some key English phrases. "Po-LEESE! Po-LEESE!" the students recited in unison, practicing a 911 call. Coming from a country without government or law, the idea that help is only a phone call away amazed Yussuf, whose parents were killed and who is traveling to the U.S. alone. "So if anyone bothers me, I just call 911 and the police come and beat them?" she asked. "Life must be very easy." Immigrants also heard about U.S. laws. Beating your wife and children is illegal, they were told, and so is chewing khat, the leafy amphetamine-like stimulant popular in Somalia. Performing genital excision on young girls is prohibited. "If I can't beat my wife, how will she know that I love her?" Abrone asked, seated next to his silent teenage bride. Monogamy was equally unpopular with some men, who said their religion permitted four wives. But Kassim shut down the debate. "It doesn't matter," he told them. "In the U.S. you'll barely be able to afford one wife, anyway." The second day of class began with an exercise in equality. Students broke into teams and were asked to identify which potential U.S. jobs — taxi driver, hairdresser or doctor, for example — were held exclusively by men and which were held by women. It was a trick question, designed to spark a discussion about gender equality. In one group, Abdi Ahmed Mohammed, 56, a former Mogadishu shopkeeper, grabbed the worksheet and began dividing the occupations by gender. "Wait," Yussuf complained. "Why is 'housekeeper' female?" "It's woman's work," Mohammed snapped, checking the box for "female." As the instructor began calling on students to defend their answers, it became clear that, at least in the U.S., the correct answer for all jobs was "both." Mohammed began discreetly erasing his worksheet, and when the instructor asked for his answer for "baby-sitter," he covered the paper with an arm and answered confidently, "Both." The day ended with a tour of the mock kitchen and bathroom. Mohammed ran his fingers over the surface of the gas stove as if it were a shiny new Porsche. Kassim demonstrated how to use a variety of strange Western products, including toothpaste, shampoo and toilet paper. "Why must I hide behind the curtain in the shower?" one student asked. "It's to prevent the water from splashing," Kassim explained. Some refugee experts worry that the classes focus too heavily on such basic household lessons. "They can learn about flushing toilets and riding buses once they get there," said Hussain Mahmood, head of the Kakuma branch of the Office of the United Nations High Commissioner for Refugees, which also works with Somali refugees. "Instead, I think they'd be better served by a frank discussion about the discrimination and hostilities they may face as Muslims or Africans in the U.S. What's going to happen when a woman in a scarf meets some skinhead? I'd like to see more about dealing with those cultural challenges." By the end of the second day, however, the challenges of living in the U.S. were beginning to sink in for some. "I'm starting to worry about where I will live and who will take care of my baby when I go to work," said Fozia Ahmed Hussein Mohammed, 24 and eight months pregnant. Her boyfriend was not eligible to go with her. "This is going to be more difficult than I thought," she said. By the third day, Kassim was scrambling to squeeze in the final lessons. He turned to finances and budgeting. Immigrants might hope to earn $1,000 a month, he told them, but rent for a two-bedroom apartment averages $800, depending upon the area. "One income will not be enough," he said. New arrivals get a 30-day assistance package, including help finding a house or apartment, but after that they are expected to find employment. U.S. government relief programs, such as food stamps and welfare, are also available to immigrants. Kassim concluded with a lesson that left many students in disbelief. He showed them a large chart displaying immigrants' typical mood swings, first soaring during a "honeymoon" phase, then plummeting during a "depression" and finally settling at a "recovery." "At first you will feel as if you've gone to paradise," Kassim said. "Everything is so easy." But research has shown that later many will experience sadness, loneliness, culture shock and pangs of guilt over friends and family left behind in Africa. "It's called stress," he told them. "You can't sleep. You watch TV all the time. Some people even kill themselves." A few students stiffened in their chairs. A couple laughed nervously. It was incomprehensible that they would survive years of hunger and homelessness in Somalia only to commit suicide in one of the richest countries in the world. "How could we feel depressed there?" Abdi Ahmed Mohammed asked. "After the life we are living, any other life will be better." Asked for a show of hands of how many believed they might experience stress or sadness, not a single hand went up. "We do what we can to warn them," Kassim said after conducting a brief graduation ceremony. "I hope they are ready." Outside, graduates clutched their cultural orientation "diplomas," unable to hide their growing excitement. Some would board airplanes in a matter of days. Sofia Sharif, 21, was 6 when her village was attacked. Her father was killed; her mother and five siblings disappeared into the bush. Today she is alone in the world, except for a distant older cousin who kept Sharif out of school and forced her to keep house and take care of the cousin's children. "If my parents had lived, I might have had the chance to go to school," Sharif said. "But so what? I'm 21. I'm single. And now I'm going to America."

^ That is taking it to another level Mansa lol. I thought waqtiyada cashada inay ku fiican tahay. Laakiin qof walbo dooqiisa waaye, so i am not trying to dissuade you from the blessed beans. Qudhacna gartii waaye inuu xanaaqo. Gurigii uu dhisay aa duufaan kusoo socotaa Reer hebel ahaan amaan hala igu siiyo waa laga diiday, Dhulka anaa iska leh sidaan doonaana ka yeelaa waa laga diiday, qabiillo kale aan u hadlaana waa laga diiday. Waa ku taagan tahay. Dadaa wax kula dheggan.

^ That is taking it to another level Mansa lol. I thought waqtiyada cashada inay ku fiican tahay. Laakiin qof walbo dooqiisa waaye, so i am not trying to dissuade you from the blessed beans. Qudhacna gartii waaye inuu xanaaqo. Gurigii uu dhisay aa duufaan kusoo socotaa Reer hebel ahaan amaan hala igu siiyo waa laga diiday, Dhulka anaa iska leh sidaan doonaana ka yeelaa waa laga diiday, qabiillo kale aan u hadlaana waa laga diiday. Waa ku taagan tahay. Dadaa wax kula dheggan.

^ Qudhac, aan ku weydiiyee saaxib, maka dhaaran kartaa Cambuulo inaadan cunin weligaa? I saw xarfaan Waqooyi iyo Puntland ka yimid oo meelahaan lahaa maqaayad yaa yaqaanno laga Kariyo Ugali(Soor dhagax) iyo Fool(Digir maraqeysan) May be iyadoo gasacadeysan aa soo iibsataa si aan laguu dhihin maxaa waxaan noogu keentay lol. Qabiil lagu qaraabto waa soo afjarmay. The Clanland is soon to become Somaliland once again.

^ Qudhac, aan ku weydiiyee saaxib, maka dhaaran kartaa Cambuulo inaadan cunin weligaa? I saw xarfaan Waqooyi iyo Puntland ka yimid oo meelahaan lahaa maqaayad yaa yaqaanno laga Kariyo Ugali(Soor dhagax) iyo Fool(Digir maraqeysan) May be iyadoo gasacadeysan aa soo iibsataa si aan laguu dhihin maxaa waxaan noogu keentay lol. Qabiil lagu qaraabto waa soo afjarmay. The Clanland is soon to become Somaliland once again.

Duke, see waaye saaxib, come on, you can't bail out on us. Somalia is nothing without Puntland. We need regime change that is all. Cadde musse oo kaliya aan rabnaa inaan kusoo celino Meeshuu ceerta ka qaadan jiray(assuming jobs are scarce over there anyway and discriminatory) ee Toronto.

Duke, see waaye saaxib, come on, you can't bail out on us. Somalia is nothing without Puntland. We need regime change that is all. Cadde musse oo kaliya aan rabnaa inaan kusoo celino Meeshuu ceerta ka qaadan jiray(assuming jobs are scarce over there anyway and discriminatory) ee Toronto.

Mansa, you made me think, Is the Sheekh in the Video the same one in Hargeysa Jail? You know, I never thought of the man in the video who is being beaten to be the real sheekh and decided the video was fake. If he is the one whose daughter was crying for his release, surely, somebody must invade Hargeysa. Obviously the residents who wanted to do something about it are powerless. This is what the ex-hangash bigots do when the courts are thousands of Kilometers away If Hargeysa continues this kind of practice, it will pay a heavy price.

Originally posted by Che-Guevara: Laba dollar.....High robbery yaaqeey even in da Somali deep south. I say form union, and start negotiations right away. P.S Xoog****, I can see your smiles these days man. LOL@you can see my smiles these days. Nothing significant bro. I have had smiles on my face always. Adaa laga yaabaa kan maanta inaa si gooni u aragtay Btw, I had been to Kismayo twice, and the only thing I liked was the high quality soccer at the beach and Xalwo Dhagax/sabun(I think it was called one of those, can't remember). I didn't like the weather a bit, too hot for me. I think the pay is that small because of the sheer number of participants who want to get paid. If they had more to offer they would have I suppose.

Kismayo clean-up That is a lot of money for a poor lad/lady in Kismayo. I must say the courts are putting good use to the tax being collected from the Sea-port already.

^LOL, DidiKong, Dhulka lagu siiyo wax iga sii anigana. Offer me a piece of the piece you will be offered I said in case your somali is not that good. Anyway, Kismayo soomaaliyaa leh cid loo aqoonsan yahay si goonni ah ma jirto. Ninkii guri uga dhisan yahay, dhulkaas u dhisanuu ka leeyahay magaalada, kan qaraabo ku leh uu la joogi karana waxbuu ka leeyahy, kan intuu yimaado dhul ka gatana dhinacuu ka leeyahay, that is how it goes. Well, at least if we talk about sanity and set aside dhaqanka dadka qaarkii oo iyaga waxay taabtaanba ku leh annagaa is kaleh. In wax lala qeebsado ma oggola and the rest of us have caught the bug. Now we are all crazy. Horn. You have made your decision bro, there is nothing I can tell you to change your mind. I know for certain your clan has lost nothing just because Barre hiiraale and his militia left town. I wouldn't measure the successes and failures of the clan according to the losses and gains of individual men if I were you. I hear some your elders and intellectuals are in kismayo working with others. Whether these clansmen of yours in kismayo count in your book is another story.

I can't decide the authenticity of this video purported as torture. They are telling the guy to not laugh at the onset although sometimes he seemed genuinely frightened. I honestly don't know what to make of this. I will have to watch once more.

Xiin, You are one of the best guys on SOL bro. You are far from a clanist or someone who bases his debates on clan sentiments. Horn and Alla magan, waa soo noqonaa inshallah.

Horn and Allamagan, your support for the courts when many showed hostility towards them was honorable. If that support you provided to them morally was based on principle and that you agreed they were forces of positive change, your support should still stand as it was. Kismayo take-over seems strategic and fear of Igad troops eventually landing in that town. No one died in the take-over and I would say thanks to Barre Hiiraale who made a wise choice considering his options unlike Qeybdiid, Yalaxoow, Qanyare and etc. He made the best choice one in his position could ever make, not fight and leave. Your clansmen in kismayo are part of the population, they are as much rightful owners of the town as everyone else. This concept of clan-x owns a certain town really is something new that came to us from mudug and beyond, marka, with Turki head of the security and overall management of the city, the town is a somali town with no one abale to lay claim to it. It is for all somalis. I was told Hassan Turki first thing he did was send a warning in public to his immidiate clansmen and tell them they shouldn't come from every corner under the false assumption that Hassan Turki is related to them and the city now is theirs. If it is justice you seek, it is here, if your pride was hurt because Barre Hiiraale whom you supported for personal or tribal reasons was forced to leave under difficult circumstances, then saaxiibayaal, waxba hadal xun yuusan idinka tagin. We should all wait and see how events unfold. Surely, calling for a war is not the best thing to do.

I didn't look at the sitaution that way. Waa suuro gal, laakiin sheekh aweysba maku jiroo liiska? Mar walbana isagoo intuu u safray la leeyahay waan maqalnaa oo uma eka qof dhuumasho ku nool. You are right, Soomaali kama baqaayo hassan turki waxaana fiican nimankaan ilma adeertiisa ee awalba markuu xamar ka diriraayay taageersanaa inay haddana iska illoobaan qabyaaladda.

^ LOL, Amaan la amaano maxkamadaha xataa wax waa lagu waayay. Funny indeed.

Damaashaadkiiba manoo dhammaanin ee see camal warkaan? lool@sheekh turki oo isaga baxay magaaladii amaan darri aawadeed. Tan hadday dhacdo rajo beel tii ugu xumeed waaye and somalia is doomed. This is what we get when every jifo opens a website news for us. Waa lagu wareeraa. Ukaadi aan soo aqriyee kii maxkamadda waxay iyagana ka dhahaan lol.

Horn, brother, nin caqli lahaa tahaye sheydaanka iska naar. How about the young men from your clan who went to Muqdisho to fight alongside the courts to evict the warlords from Xamar? kuwaasaa hadda ka tirsan ciidamada yimid Kismayo, taageer dadkaas saxib iyagaa kaa mudan. The loss of Barre should not be interpretted as the loss of an entire clan if that is the main reason some brothers are upset. The city still belongs to all somalis. Muran dambe ma jiri doono.

Scarface, according to more than one news sources, Barre is at Baardheere. We hope he takes the same wise decision again and not get involved in unnecessary war. He has earned my respect for abandoning town without a fight.

Originally posted by xiinfaniin: Ramadaan Kariim. Thanks Paragon for bringing this one up! They also need to address the issue of their perceived clannish association by disarming Barre’s coalition remnants i.e. Seeraar, and Goobaale. Once again Courts are rushing with success, as it were, where the TFG feared to tread. Golaha Maxaakimta Islaamiga Soomaaliyeed ee kusugan Magaalada Kismaayo oo maanta lawareegaya Hubka Haraadigii Isbaheysigii Dooxada Jubba. Kismaayo, 27-September-06 ( Qaadisiya.com) Masuuliyiinta maxaakimta islaamiga Soomaaliyeed ee ku sugan magaalada Kismaayo ayaa la filayaa maanta in hubka ay kala wareegaan maleeshiyaadka taabacsan qaar kamid ah masuuliyiinta isbahaysigii bur buray ee dooxada Jubba ee weli ku sugan magaaladaasi,si loo soo afjaro muuqaalada hubeysan ee ka jira magaalada Kismaayo. Sheekh Ibraahim Abu Zeynab oo ka mid ah masuuliyiinta maxaakimta islaamiga ee ku sugan magaalada Kismaayo ayaa u sheegay talafashinka Aljazeera in maxaakimta ay dhiseen guddi gaar ah oo hubka kala wareega maleeshiyaadka weli ku sugan magaalada Kismaayo, isagoo beeniyay in ay jiraan cid ka tirsan maamulkii hore oo hub ku heysanaysa magaalada Kismaayo. Abu Zeynab waxa uu sheegay in hubka qura ee loo ogol yahay in magaalada lagu dhex wato uu noqon doono kan ku jira gacanta ciidamada maxkamada islaamiga, isagoo meesha ka saaray in la kala soocayo masuuliyiinta maamulkii bur buray ee isbahaysiga dooxada Jubba. "Guddi gaar ah oo hubka kala wareega dhamaan maleeshiyaadka ku sugan magaalada Kismaayo, mana jiro wax kala soocid ah oo aan ku sameynayno maamulkii hore ee Dooxada Jubba, dhamaan hubka ayaa laga dhigayaa" ayuu yiri Abu Zeynab oo u warramayay talafashinka Aljazeera,isagoo ku sugan magaalada Kismaayo. Hadalka masuulkan ka tirsan maxkamadaha ayaa soo afjaraya wararkii been abuurka ahaa ee sheegayay in maxaakimta ay kala soocayaan maamulkii bur buray ee isbahaysiga dooxada Jubba, qaar ay soo dhaweynayaan qaarna ay magaalada ka saareen. here

MOGADISHU — Deserted mosques across the Somali capital Mogadishu, which have been either closed for or turned into garbage dumps by warlord militias, are being cleaned and dressed up to welcome worshippers in the holy fasting month of Ramadan. "No one has prayed inside this mosque for years after gangsters had used it as a garbage dump and a place to burry their innocent victims of their crimes," Hassan Mohamed told IslamOnline.net while watching the restoration of the Arbaa Rokn mosque in southern Mogadishu. "By the will of God we will get this mosque ready before the start of Ramadan," said a confident Mohamed. "However, the mosque's high minaret has always spoken of its history." Mohamed plans to hand over the mosque after its revamp to trusted scholars to teach people the tenets of Islam. In addition to the renovation, the mosque is preparing a busy schedule for worshippers during Ramadan including Qur'anic classes and iftar banquets for the poor. Arbaa Rokn is one the country's oldest mosques, dating back to the second half of the 19th century. Full Swing Nearby, people are having their hands full with work to complete the restoration of the Sheikh Ahmed mosque in northern Mogadishu before the holy month. "Residents hope to be able to perform prayers at this grand mosque during Ramadan," Sheikh Ahmed Mino, who supervises the work, told IOL. The mosque had been closed for the past 16 years. Restoration works are also continuing around the clock at the Islamic Solidarity mosque. The mosque, the largest in the Horn of Africa region, was opened last August for the first time since the outbreak of the civil war. It was established in 1987 by the Saudi King Faisal bin Abdel-Aziz Foundation and accommodates around 10,000 worshippers. Dilapidated governmental buildings are also the focus of the restoration efforts. "Chaos and destruction have plagued everything in Somali, either worship places or government buildings," said preacher Sheikh Abdul-Aziz Mohamed. "Now, the Somalis are rebuilding their country." Home to about 10 million largely impoverished people, Somalia has lacked almost all the trappings of a functional state, such as national systems of education, healthcare and justice, for the past 16 years. Warlords had controlled the capital of the Horn of Africa country since the 1991 overthrow of president Mohamed Siad Barre. But the Somalis started enjoying rare moments of peace and security since the Islamic Courts rose to power by capturing Mogadishu and other key areas in June from the US-backed warlords. Source: Islam Online, Sept 14, 2006 Mosque

Those are well, Unsightly! Are they modeling? This is sickness and not normal you have to agree.

Originally posted by sheherazade: quote:Originally posted by Xoogsade: If the guy doesn't ask you to marry him and he knows you very well, probably he isn't interested, so don't bother asking. Don't men think like that about women? Or are they all sure a woman who shows interest wants to marry them? The man should be the one seeking the woman's hand although I wouldn't find a woman who asks a man to marry her strange. Just smitten. Why 'should'? A man can be afraid of rejection and sh*t scared or waiting for something to materialise for him(money, home etc.). And why smitten? A woman can know a good thing when she sees it. What purpose does it serve- the gender of the asker being male? Much ado about nothing I reckon.Sheherazade, not every woman who shows interest in a man surely wants to marry him. The interest could be anything, however, in a courtship where both parties have shown more than the usual interest in one another, and a level of understanding have been attained with no barrier to union, the man should pop the question. If the lady does ask before he does, fine by me as well. Paragon. Why is the guy that scared of her to begin with? I can understand if he thinks he will be rejected and he isn't too sure.