TO SUBDUE MAD MULLAH. British and Abyssinians Sending Out Strong Punitive Expedition. The Washington Post (1877-1954) - Washington, D.C. Date: Mar 8, 1901 Text Word Count: 256 London, March 7. -- Two British officers, Maj. A.H. Tracy and Capt. R.P. Cobbold, start to-morrow for Adis Adeba, capital of Abyssinia, where they will act as advisers to the Abyssinian commander-in-chief, Ras Makonnen, in his approaching expedition against the Mad Mullah, who has been causing a disturbance in Northern Somaliland.

Ariqis did in fullajah to american, it simply illustrates how deep people hate the ethiopian stooges,

Africans, especially Somalis, stood by stunned by the manner with which international law was violated, trampled on and discarded by the US-backed Ethiopian war of aggression and invasion against Somalia. Why was the international community as deafeningly silent as innocent Somalis were bombed by US and Ethiopian bombers? Why was there no public outrage as innocent men, women and children were massacred in cold blood by the invading Ethiopian forces and labeled “extremists”, “Islamists” etc. etc.? Have we reached the point where human lives no longer merit our concern and that by simply labeling populations as “extremists”, “Islamists”, “jihadists”, etc. etc. that we can look the other way as thousands are massacred in front of our eyes and not care. Do we believe that we are somehow absolved of any responsibility in the carnage perpetuated under the auspices of the “global war on terrorism”? It is high time that we claimed humanity back! The other day, I listened as several terrorism experts from the US War College and Women in International Security discussed the global war on terrorism. I didn’t agree with some of the views presented by the panelists, some went out of their way to reinforce the racists and biased stereotypes that we have been hearing about Islam and its followers for the last few years. Some were there just to reinforce and feed into the public fear, by engaging in more of the same defamation, misinformation and disinformation under the guise of “research”, “analysis” etc. etc. but that is not my topic for today. I want to take a look at what happened in Somalia on Christmas Eve 2006 and how so many reasonable persons of high intellect fell for the deceptive, exaggerated claims by Jendayi E. Frazier and Meles Zenawi and remained deaf, dumb and mute as innocent people were pulverized and terrorized by Ethiopian aerial bombardments, supposedly targeted at “extremists”, “jihadists”, “fundamentalists”, etc. etc. Jendayi E. Frazier’s deliberate, very vocal and calculated vilification and demonization of the Union of Islamic Courts succeeded in dividing the international community and rendering it totally helpless and off guard as Ethiopia’s war of aggression and invasion of Somalia progressed. Suppression of the truth in the US media and the many tentacles policy institutions through “seminars”, “hearings”, “briefings”, “statements” etc. etc. raised the FEAR, UNCERTAINTY and DOUBT (FUD) about the UIC and its constituents and both Washington and Ethiopia took advantage of the situation. Ethiopia and its puppet the Transitional National Government of Somalia led by Abdulahi Yusuf and Ali Mohammed Geedi, and Jendayi E. Frazier ran a coordinated defamation campaign designed to alter the very positive public’s perception of the UIC and its popular support, to isolate it as they planned the end of year illegal aggressive invasion of Somalia. The FUDists, those that spread FEAR, UNCERTAINTY and DOUBT about the UIC, went out of their way to accuse other nations of violating the UN Arms Embargo on Somalia, while covering up their own 17 year long meddling in Somalia that has contributed to the chaos and anarchy that has earned Somalia the dubious title of being “a hotbed for terrorists”. It was Ethiopia and Washington that funneled funds into Somalia that exacerbated the crisis in Somalia as various warring factions, hired by the US (through the CIA) and Ethiopia, spread death and violence in Somalia. Washington and Ethiopia exploited the inter-clan fighting to advance their own selfish interests in Somalia and contributed to the balkanization of Somalia. Self-fulfilling prophecy…. Today, they are busy pointing fingers at others for not following their suit. They are still spreading FUD as they criticize and demonize those who did not support their misadventures into Somalia. To cover up their desperate and evil end of year invasion of Somalia, they are now engaged in bullying, blackmailing, coercing, intimidations and harassments as they try to put together the illegal AU “stabilization force” for Somalia, to replace the marauding Ethiopian forces, in order to prop up the illegitimate puppet TNG, further violating Somalia’s sovereignty or territorial integrity. This mistake will perpetuate the chaos and turmoil that has engulfed Somalia since the aggressive Ethiopian invasion and occupation. Jendayi E. Frazier’s incessant and irrational attacks on the UIC were challenged by many Horn observers and analysts, but there were enough Islam phobic FUDists in Washington that bought her unsubstantiated claims about the nature and makeup of the UIC, lock, stock and barrel. Here is what some of them said: •“…We're going to remain committed to reducing terrorist capabilities when and where we find them. The operation two days ago was an example of that…. It was based on credible intelligence that led us to believe that we had principal Al Qaeda leadership in an area where we could identify them and take action against them…” Bryan Whitman, Pentagon spokesperson •“…This is the way you fight the War on Terror. This is a way you hunt them out and take them out…” Senator Gordon Smith (R-Oregon) •“…My view is we should go after terrorists wherever they are… It depends on who that is and leader of what. They may just be a little small cell leader or they could have quite a bit of influence on the African continent or even beyond that…” Senator Mark Pryor (D-Arkansas). •“…The threat we face is in many, many countries and we have to be vigilant in many, many places…” Rep. Adam Smith (D-Washington) •Etc. etc. Jendayi E. Frazier down played Ethiopia’s invasion, and in the public arena, the invasion of Somalia was presented as part of the war on terrorism. The rubber stamp Ethiopian Parliament was equally duped by the street smart Prime Minister and today, Ethiopian forces are paying for Meles Zenawi’s lies, deceptions and mistakes in Somalia. Convincing lawmakers that the UIC was “harboring” terrorists and exaggerating the threats posed by the UIC to the US and Ethiopian, Jendayi E. Frazier got lawmakers to approve her agenda for Somalia, and Meles got his permission from the rubberstamp Ethiopian parliament “to take all necessary actions to defend Ethiopia’s sovereignty”. Jendayi E. Frazier missed the real danger that lurks in the region. She ignored the dangers posed to all the people in the region by the minority regime in Ethiopia led by her friend and confidante Meles Zenawi? While Somalia’s lack of a centralized government is often cited as the reason why Washington considers Somalia a “hotbed for terrorists”, nothing is ever said about the terrorist regime in Ethiopia. The people of Somalia are deliberately misrepresented in the mainstream western media and in their multi-tentacled policy institutions as being lawless, violent and anarchic. There is nothing about the Somali people, their culture or their religion that makes them inherently violent or anarchic. Their clan divisions have been exploited and exaggerated for political reasons. On the other hand, the people of Ethiopia with 80 ethnic groups constantly in conflict over scarce resources, with religious conflicts raging in various parts of the country are presented as poor but peaceful and “Christian”. Somalis are victims of self serving, myopic, power hungry individuals who have misrepresented them in the international arena to advance their own interests and agendas. More than anything else, it is the self serving interventions, in contravention of international law, that have contributed to the turmoil in Somalia for the last 15 years. The Somali people are no more prone to violence and anarchy then are any other peoples in this world who are forced to live under regimes that practice the rule of the jungle, over the rule of law. Somalia’s negative image has been advanced by those who seek to use Somalia in pursuit of their own agendas in the region and have taken advantage of the lack of a central government in Somalia to do so. The people of Somalia were never a threat to any neighboring states and they deserved a chance to rebuild their war torn nation. But because of the corrupt behavior of some Islam phobic officials in Washington and Ethiopia, the dreams and aspirations of the Somali people have been suppressed-temporarily. While Somalia’s reputation is muddied in the western press and by ill-informed, ill advised, myopic individuals and groups, the terrorist mercenary regime in Ethiopia seems to be enjoying praises for its violation of international laws, wrecking havoc in the lives of Horn inhabitants, for its warmongering and destabilizing of the entire region, undermining regional peace and security, and with it, destroying any prospects for measurable development for its inhabitants. If Jendayi E. Frazier were to take a few minutes to remove the wool that is over her eyes and distorting the truth, she would see that Meles Zenawi’s minority regime is itself a terrorist regime, and Meles Zenawi has made Ethiopia a “hotbed for terrorists”. Today Meles is playing the role of Washington’s dutiful mercenary; tomorrow he will surely seek another sponsor. His TPLF regime’s ugly history is replete with betrayals, broken promises, deceptions and greed. But let us put Meles’ trustworthiness aside and look at his regime through the eyes of the terrorism experts. According to them, Ethiopia under the minority regime led by Meles Zenawi possesses several key characteristics that create the right environments in which terrorists breed, flourish and thrive. These conditions enable Meles Zenawi’s rule of force; his regime has created the environment that fits his rule. A mercenary regime cannot be an ally in the global war on terrorism Ethiopia under the lawless and belligerent genocidal minority regime led by Meles Zenawi: •Is a lawless regime that refuses to abide by international law and agreements it willingly and consciously signed-terrorists operate outside international law and norms of acceptable behavior •Is a regime that believes in “might makes right” and uses force to effectuate its domestic and international policies -terrorists use violence and force to effectuate theirs •Is a regime that has exacerbated poverty in Ethiopia-Ethiopians are left destitute and hopeless. •Is a state suffering from the dangerous and debilitating grip of corruption •Is a brutal apartheid state-where major ethnic groups are marginalized (ex. Somalis in the ******, the Oromos in Oromia, the Anuak and Nuer of Gambela, etc. etc.) Latent tensions among Ethiopia’s 80 ethnic groups are in effect further exacerbated by the government’s ethnic policies •Ranks 170 out of 177 countries in the United Nation’s Human Development Report-adds to the humiliation of an otherwise very proud population •Is a country where between 6 and 13 million people are at risk of starvation each year and depend on food handouts-nothing undermines a person’s sense of self worth than to have to beg for food year in and year out •Is a country where 80% of the nearly 77 million people live below a poverty line of $2 a day-little hope for a better future •Is a country where over 65% of its national budget is subsidized by donors-lack of political independence, lack on confidence in their own ability to govern their nation in peace •Is a country where there is widespread human rights violations-cold blooded massacres, genocides, harassment and intimidation of opposition supporters, detention of all opposition leaders on trumped up charges of treason and inciting genocide etc. etc. Fear and anxiety are on the increase •Is a country where close to 600000 people have been internally displaced because of the regime’s war mongering and its reckless “poverty reduction” schemes, and live on the mercy of aid workers •Is a country that finances and harbors terrorist groups (Ex. Eritrean Islamic Jihad) In addition, the minority regime in Ethiopia has sponsored cross border terrorist attacks, human trafficking, kidnappings and murders, in Eritrea, Kenya, Sudan and Somalia and continues to harbor and finance the Eritrean Islamic Jihad-now operating under the umbrella organization Eritrean National Alliance (ENA) which has killed innocent civilians, destroyed vital infrastructure and terrorized border populations. ENA, much like the TNG in Somalia is made up of self-serving, greedy, treasonous individuals who have committed grave crimes against the people of Eritrea and they were also formed under the tutelage of Meles Zenawi in Gondar, Ethiopia. Meles Zenawi’s regime has flouted international law, violated the sovereignty and territorial integrity of all neighboring countries, tortured and massacred thousands of innocent Ethiopians, committed genocide in the Gambela region, has violated over two dozen Security Council Resolutions on Eritrea and Ethiopia, has rejected the Final and Binding Eritrea Ethiopia Boundary Commission’s (EEBC) ruling, has intimidated, harassed and forced the independent EEBC to close its offices and abandon its sole mandate of demarcating the Eritrea Ethiopia border, and continues to violate several articles of the African Union and UN Charters, and yet... Somalia is presented as a lawless country and a “hotbed for terrorists”, and Ethiopia is presented as the US’ staunch ally in the “global war against terrorism”…go figure! On 15 February 2007, I listened as President George Bush talk about Afghanistan and the fight against the Taliban and how the United States was going to support President Karzai in the rebuilding of Afghan institutions, including the Judicial System. Something he said got my attention. He told his audience the following: “…we're going to help President Karzai fight corruption. And one place where he needs help is in the judicial system. There's nothing more discouraging when justice is not fair. And Afghans too often see their courts run by crooked judges. It's important to have the confidence of the people in a free society. Crooked judges makes it hard to earn that confidence… The international community is helping this new government build a justice system so they can replace the rule of the Taliban with the rule of law…” I agree with the President; corruption breeds lawlessness, corruption undermines the people’s confidence in national and international institutions, and most of all, corruption obscures the truth and obstructs justice. Corruption breeds terrorism. What will it take for President Bush to support justice for the people of Eritrea, Ethiopia and Somalia by supporting the rule of law over the rule of Meles Zenawi? When will Washington stop providing diplomatic, financial, and political support for Meles Zenawi, a certified terrorist in his own rite? The rule of law must prevail over the law of the jungle! http://www.americanchronicle.com/articles/viewArticle.asp?articleID=20927

Soon ato malesa is done what ever purpose he had using beerlawe..... and replace him another potentially vaible stooge....we will see the sudden change of puntlander's prespectives about the TFG

Originally posted by MKA Yoonis: Duke they're saying, that a certain Afgadud suspiciously left minutes before the blast took place! The people of that city can now finally return after seven years of absence of that city and live there once again peacefully without being harrassed! In short Kismaayo is for all and I see old wounds and fears are arising again but we won't send you packing this time around guranteed, hand on heart! Stop the devision, inflaming of the situation and finger-pointing without substential proof other then Af-Gaduud stood up and left minutes before the blast and lets work together to rebuild beautiful Kismaayo! Viva Kismaayo! [/b] The above poster, wait till the ethiopians leave...and see wat happen those puntlanders....another 1991 massacre is coming jubaland is for all somalis and cut the curb and for once try to come out behind ethiopians

i see there is alot of feminism advocates in the house,...lol i didn't get it... why you all getting defensive out of the blue my mali sis..i am not anti women and to the contrary i luv women and i have alot of respect for them,..how can i be anti women when i come from women, i am against any kinda of voilence against women and i will never sit tight if i see a women being harrased let alone beaten but ladies you need distinguish between women who are feminine and those who are inverted. A feminine woman is receptive to men. She exudes cheerfulness and inviting warmth. A man can make a friendly remark and be well received. An inverted woman, on the other hand, is fearful and defiant in the presence of men. She has been taught that man is a competitor, or worse, a predator. These women are out of touch with their nature and you can tell. Woman's essential nature is to be an incubator of love. Her natural role is to create an environment in which living beings thrive. Her destiny is to love a man, and through him her children. Her reward is their love and happiness. Sexual intercourse and childbirth are manifestations of a spiritual relationship. A man must first plant his spirit in a woman's heart and find a warm reception. That spirit takes root and love grows into a sapling, and then a towering oak. Finally, a child is the expression of this unseen reality. What are the elements of this male-female dynamic? The male must present a woman with a spirit that she can embrace. Men generally use money or power to appeal to women. However, a man is much more than a provider or doer.... Every man has a divine mission and purpose on earth. This mission imbues him with a confident masculinity, which appeals to a woman's higher instincts.

A friend who is divorcing his wife told me: "I fell out of love because she became too masculine." The major reason somali families are breaking up is that somali women are brainwashed to think they are oppressed and need to be more like men. first let's talk about american Domestic violence laws, this laws are designed to destroy families NOT protect women. Domestic violence laws prevent men from exercising the leadership that most women actually want. What couple does not encounter stress, especially when they have children? But in the fever of emotion, a woman can call "911" and have three police cars there in minutes. what most somali women don't understand is that After this fateful act, she loses all control. The state prosecutes her husband whether she likes it or not. He is jailed and prohibited from returning home. **** up his record for the rest of his life They don't realize that powerful forces want to exacerbate their problems in order to undermine the social fabric. These forces are determined to destroy the family and create dysfunctional people. Women in genuine danger are lost in a sea of trivial cases. In male-on-male assaults, first-time cases are always referred to mediation. This should take place in domestic situations as well. Evil forces that have subverted governments are using feminism and lesbianism to destabilize society To equalize power is to eliminate sexual distinction. This doesn't mean that woman are not powerful and effective as women, but not by becoming men. Men -- steer clear of any sexual relationship where you are not in charge. Just as femininity should be respected, so should masculinity. You emasculate a man when you take away his power. A husband will consult his wife but eventually someone has to make a decision. A man who is ruled by his wife is less a man. He feels like a little boy with his mother. On the other hand, when his wife accepts his leadership, he feels like a man. Women help to make men. Similarly, a wife who follows her husband's leadership feels more like a woman. If she can't follow him, she should be married to someone else. The essence of femininity is for a woman to depend on the man she loves. The intimate male-female dynamic is for woman to entrust worldly power to her husband, and for him to use it to make her happy. Man wants power. Women want love (not power.) They ARE different. A man wants to make the woman he loves happy . Does he consult her? How else can he please her? She reciprocates by making him happy. The energy flows. Woman must give man the power to love her. If she is "strong, bold and independent," as she is being taught, he becomes redundant Woman shows she loves a man by empowering him, by surrendering and trusting. Women want to be possessed by a man's love. (They are not men.) Of course the contract breaks down if the man doesn't keep his end of the bargain. He must be her champion, loyal and loving to the end. If this contract breaks down, the marriage is over. A woman is a vehicle by nature. She is waiting for a man's call. She wants to be used by the man she loves for a higher purpose. One such purpose is to create a healthy happy family. A man, therefore, should have a clear idea of what he wants, and the role he wants a woman to play. Then he finds a wife who meets HIS criteria instead of contorting himself for every sexually attractive woman he meets. Age-old standards of masculinity still apply. A man must supply just leadership and sustenance to his family. Therefore he must have control. (Domestic violence legislation is designed to destroy families by undermining paternal authority. Ninety five per cent of the cases involve power struggles NOT battered women. These days men have no way to measure themselves. They are like little boys looking for love. A woman needs to be enlisted, not entreated. Woman's nature is to nurture and love her husband and children. She wants to be needed, honored and loved in return. A woman should never be taken for granted. (Nor should a man.) When a woman identifies with her husband, they become one in marriage. If they remain "independent," they remain roommates open to every temptation. Certainly a woman has her own interests and career but these are not her first priority. A woman has a limited "window of opportunity" (approximately 12 years) in which to start a family. Millions have been duped into concentrating on a career instead of a husband. They are consigned to lonely frustrated bitter lives thumbing well-worn copies of "The Vagina Monologues". A woman wants to be an extension of her husband. She is the spiritual ground in which he plants his seed. She is the recipient of to his spirit. By "accepting" him wholeheartedly, he "belongs" to her. This union results in psychological maturity for both. Together they create a new world and bring children into it. Millions of people suffer from arrested development due to elite sponsorship of feminism which has poisoned heterosexual relations. Societal obsession with sex and pornography is a symptom. Society has witnessed an unprecedented decline in the nuclear family with a parallel increase in personal and social dysfunction.

When a man marries, his wife has three qualities she is aneconomist in the kitchen, an aristocrat in the living room and a devil in bed. After a few years, sure enough the three qualities remain, but not in the same order she is an aristocrat in the kitchen, a devil in the living room and an economist in bed.

I received this is an e-mail... Never take our parents for granted.. :wub: The world is full of sons and daughters like you and me.......... I had a marvelous mother, who loved me, sacrificed for me and helped me in every way possible. In all of my growing up from childhood through school and eventually marriage, My mother was always at my side. And when I needed help with my little ones, she was there for me. A few years ago, we buried this wonderful woman. Can you imagine how I felt when I returned home and found this poem in her drawer . The time is now If you are ever going to love Love me now while I can know The sweet and tender feelings Which from true affection flow Love me now while I am living Do not wait until I am gone And then when I am covered with dust Sweet words said after I am gone If you have tender thoughts of me Please let me know now If you wait until I am sleeping There will be death between us And I will not hear you then So if you love me, even a little bit Let me know while I am living So that I can treasure it. Now she is gone and I am sick with guilt because I never told her what she meant to me. Worse yet, I did not treat her as she deserved to be treated. I found time for everyone and everything else but I never made time for her. It would have been easy to drop in for a cup of tea and a hug but my friends came first. Would any of them have done for me what my mother did? I know the answer. When I called mom on the phone, I was always in a hurry. I feel ashamed when I think of the times I cut her off. I remember too, the times I could have included her and did not. The world is filled with sons, daughters and a child like me. I hope they see themselves in this letter and realise from it.

caramel for sure i will not go back to those habits,..or my call evil deeds rather i regret perfoming them,.. and i really feel absolutely happy and at ease not perfoming them any more

thank you all,,,every minute i thank to allah for giving me the opportunity to go to the hajj i felt peace within my self for the first time and you can't imagin the joy and the happiness i experienced since i changed my hapits to postive ones.... i stop listening music.....to set my mind free instead i listen the quran... no more partin,or movies,.and doing so it gave me the comfert for which i long... i started spending some quality time with my family and taking care of my needs, the hajj rehabilitated me,,, it was like going the best rehabilitation center money can puy

i use to have this hapits (kad and sigar) that i feel compelled to continue to maintain a state of wellbeing ... this hapits was harmfull to my health and finance and use to keep me from fuctioning at my best and a cheaving my goals i was addicted to this hapits and i beleived that i could not live with out them that was all before i became haji,...since i became haji i stop perfoming all those hapits and even felt sorry fore those old friends of mine who are still performing those harmfull hapits thanks to allah

"After men, monkeys have the most intelligence," says an author. Others will argue that women do. To find fault with a woman's intellect you must first find her intellect. A man gets what he wants by acting smart; a woman, by playing dumb. Women can write more interestingly than men on the really important topics of civilization: dress, food and furniture. She wavers, she hesitates; in a word, she is a woman. Woman's one notable invention: Perpetual emotion. Woman submits to her fate; man makes his. God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him. There are two kinds of women: those who wish to marry, and those who haven't the slightest intention not to. To a single woman men are either dates, potential dates, or date substitutes. Women: an infinity of cosmetics. Men say knowledge is power; women think dress is power. Women who are not vain about their clothes are often vain about not being vain about their clothes. Women are the decorative sex. They never have anything to say, but they say it charmingly. Woman's first duty is to her dressmaker. What the second duty is no one has yet discovered. There are few women whose worth lasts longer than their beauty. Woman strives for loveliness, man for dignity. Beauty is the wisdom of women. Wisdom is the beauty of men. Many women would swap brains for beauty and think they were getting the best of the bargain. The average girl would rather have beauty than brains because she knows that the average man can see much better than he can think. Smart men are smarter than they look; smart women look smarter than they are. A man, conceivably, could adjust to the knowledge

A man and his young wife were in divorce court, but the custody of their children posed a problem. The mother leaped to her feet and protested to the judge that since she brought the children into this world, she should retain custody of them. The man also wanted custody of his children, so the judge asked for his justification. After a long silence, the man slowly rose from his chair and replied... "Your Honor, when I put a dollar in a vending machine and a Coke comes out, does the Coke belong to me or the machine?"

Why Men Can't Win If you work too hard, there is never any time for her. If you don't work enough, you're a good-for-nothing bum. If she has a boring repetitive job with low pay, it's exploitation. If you have a boring repetitive job with low pay, you should get off your butt and find something better. If you get a promotion ahead of her, it's favoritism. If she gets a job ahead of you, it's equal opportunity. If you mention how nice she looks, it's sexual harassment. If you keep quiet, it's male indifference. If you cry, you're a wimp. If you don't, you're insensitive. If you make a decision without consulting her, you're a chauvinist. If she makes a decision without consulting you, she's a liberated woman. If you ask her to do something she doesn't enjoy, that's domination. If she asks you, it's a favor. If you try to keep yourself in shape, you're vain. If you don't, you're a slob. If you buy her flowers, you're after something. If you don't, you're not thoughtful. If you're proud of your achievements, you're an egotist. If you're not, you're not ambitious.

Here is a very important tip... do not leave bride-hunting to your parents! Beauty is going to be the last of their priorities, coming after caste, horoscopes, family background, perceived virtue of the girl etc. Make it very clear to them that beauty is high on your list of priorities. State in no uncertain terms that you will not marry anyone who does not measure up to your standards. That will prevent them from goofing off during bride-hunting, shirking their responsibilities and palming off some family-friend's daughter on you. Another unpalatable fact is that your mother will not want you to marry someone too beautiful. This often comes as a surprise to most sons, but the reason is simple. Mothers know that, sooner or later, there will be a tussle between her and her daughter-in-law over her son's affections and loyalties. Since women are extremely conscious of their looks and tend to rate themselves accordingly, a beautiful woman has a psychological advantage over a less attractive one in an argument. Also, your mother knows that a beautiful wife will tilt the scales against her as far as you are concerned, since such a wife will probably have you dangling by the balls, if you pardon the expression. So, left to herself, your mother will limit her search to women who are less attractive than she perceives herself to be. Before you start on your bride-hunting, you should convince yourself that you deserve a beautiful wife. Do not ever think, "But I am not so good-looking anyway, what right have I to demand a lovely girl?" Since Man started walking the earth, it has been the man's wealth that has been traded off for the woman's beauty. Rest assured that your looks will be the last thing on a girl's mind when she rates you as a prospective husband. (I am limiting myself to arranged marriages here). She will be weighing your earning potential, green-card potential etc. Even in this land of feminism, "Cosmopolitan" has articles on "How to hook a rich husband" and "The ten best places to meet successful men". You have worked hard, and wasted ten of the most wonderful years of your life getting where you are. You deserve to get something out of it. Do not squander your bargaining position. In other words, do not be ashamed to make your preference for beauty known. How to check whether she is beautiful. ^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^^ First of all, never consent to marry a girl whom you have seen only in photographs. PHOTOGRAPHS LIE!!!! Photography is an art that can make fat-*** halimo look like j lo. All too often, photographs sent to prospective suitors contain only the face. Also, they usually have been so air-brushed and sanitized, all the pimples and other irregularities removed, that the end product has little in common with the original. Also, it is a certain fact that no woman will consent to send you photograph that presents herself in an unflattering light. These days, in the urban areas of somalia, it is often the practice to take an album-full of pictures of a girl when she gets to marriageable age. These pictures show the girl in various outfits, eastern and western. The album is then sent to prospective grooms-in-the-states. During my last visit to somalia, I learned from an authoritative source that many of these pictures are blatant forgeries, involving splicing the girl's head on to the figure of some other girl, sometimes professional models. In one case, pictures of a girl's good-looking sister were went out instead. Bottom line: do not make a decision based merely on photographs! Once you see the girl directly, you can easily check whether her face measures up. The figure is a different matter altogether. Women have conducted more research into packaging themselves than have been conducted on the entire US space effort. You should realize that, while you were working 24/7 , women were learning the techniques of camouflage. She KNOWS that it is her looks that count. By packaging herself so that she seems attractive to a non-resident somalis for about 10 minutes, she can earn all that it took the NRI 10 years of hard work to realize. Women are extremely honest with their friends about their positive and negative points. They are intensely aware of their flaws, and work systematically towards concealing them. A large percentage of women in somali have huge hips and very heavy thighs. This is mainly due to lack of exercise. it is impossible to check for these, which is why they are so popular. If a woman states that she does not wear pants, warning bells should ring in her mind. One way to check for obesity under the goono or the diric is to note the relative positions of her bosom and midriff. For a woman with a good figure, the bosom should be at a considerably higher level. If she dresses so that the bosom does not stand out, it is almost surely because she has a paunch that comes to the same level. Or she may be droopy, saggy or totally flat. Let me reiterate, if a girl has something to show, she will make damned sure that you will see it. One way to see how your prospective bride looks when she is not dressed up is to ask to see her family albums. NOT the ones that they keep out ostentatiously but the ones that they keep tucked away at the corner of the shelf. A lot of overweight women go through crash diets during the wedding season, starving themselves or going to professional "fat-farms" to lose dozens of pounds, to get into presentable shape for the . I i know of one woman who lost 60pounds in 8 months preparing for the wedding. She quickly gained it all back after the marriage. Pictures of the woman taken 2 or 3 years ago should tell you whether she is inclined to obesity. If, on the other hand, she is a thin woman who has padded herself up to look good , there is no way on earth that you can tell. The best way to check for this sort of stuff is to enlist the help of a sympathetic, liberated, female, friend, sister or other relative. She can easily see through the disguise and give you unbiased estimates of the interior. So, if you have a sister, you had better start being nice to her.

Request by the penis The Penis requests a promotion and a raise for the following reasons: has to work hard; has to work at great depths; has to work upside down; has no ventilation or air conditioned environment at work; - has to work in a high humidity environment; has to work at high temperatures; does not get weekends and holidays off; does not get time off after extra hours of work; Has a hazardous work environment that often causes professional sickness. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~ Request denied -------- for the following reasons: does not work 8 hours in a row; does not answer immediately to all requests; after a short activity period, falls asleep at work; shows no fidelity to the workplace; retires too early; does not work at all unless pushed from behind; does not leave the workplace clean after finishing work; - Sometimes leaves work, too early.

Perhaps the greatest compliment we can give another is to show genuine interest in their life. And one of the greatest ways to communicate love is to listen intently. If we ask the simple questions, she will respond with respect. Ask her about her new job, her love of yoga, her collection of KISS albums - whatever. Getting to know someone is the best possible compliment. 2. Support Sense when she feels that the world is against her and begin working to build her up. Tell her you appreciate her efforts at work and at home or her commitment to keeping herself looking good. 3. Admire Tell her what you enjoy and admire (her sense of humor, her taste in films, her personality) about her. 4. Pay attention Work very, very hard to dispel the stereotype that somalimen are inattentive and don’t notice anything. Pay attention, notice and compliment the new pair of shoes, haircut or outfit. These things matter not because they are outward purchases, but because they are expressions of her creativity and personality. 5. Learn Let her teach you something. Tell her that there are elements of her personality and character that you would like to implement in your own life. Ask her to teach you how to cook a favorite dish or read her favorite novel together. Let her know that knowing her makes you a more complete person. 6. Grow Finally, give her the ultimate compliment by working to be the kind of person she would want to be with. Staying in shape, engaging her on emotional and intellectual levels and showing her kindness by helping out are all tangible ways to let her know that she matters to you.

A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with a proof." Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however wrote the following: First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose. Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

A thermodynamics professor had written a take home exam for his graduate students. It had one question: "Is hell exothermic or endothermic? Support your answer with a proof." Most of the students wrote proofs of their beliefs using Boyle's Law or some variant. One student, however wrote the following: First, we postulate that if souls exist, then they must have some mass. If they do, then a mole of souls can also have a mass. So, at what rate are souls moving into hell and at what rate are souls leaving? I think that we can safely assume that once a soul gets to hell, it will not leave. Therefore, no souls are leaving. As for souls entering hell, lets look at the different religions that exist in the world today. Some of these religions state that if you are not a member of their religion, you will go to hell. Since, there are more than one of these religions and people do not belong to more than one religion, we can project that all people and all souls go to hell. With birth and death rates as they are, we can expect the number of souls in hell to increase exponentially. Now, we look at the rate of change in volume in hell. Boyle's Law states that in order for the temperature and pressure in hell to stay the same, the ratio of the mass of souls and volume needs to stay constant. So, if hell is expanding at a slower rate than the rate at which souls enter hell, then the temperature and pressure in hell will increase until all hell breaks loose. Of course, if hell is expanding at a rate faster than the increase of souls in hell, than the temperature and pressure will drop until hell freezes over.

Area 51 You've all heard of the Air Force's ultra-high-security, super-secret base in Nevada, known simply as "Area 51?" Well, late one afternoon, the Air Force folks out at Area 51 were very surprised to see a Cessna landing at their "secret" base. They immediately impounded the aircraft and hauled the pilot into an interrogation room. The pilot's story was that he took off from Las Vegas, got lost, and spotted the Base just as he was about to run out of fuel. The Air Force started a full FBI background check on the pilot and held him overnight during the investigation. By the next day, they were finally convinced that the pilot really was lost and wasn't a spy. They gassed up his airplane, gave him a terrifying "you-did-not-see-a-base" briefing, complete with threats of spending the rest of his life in prison, told him Las Vegas was that-a-way on such-and-such a heading, and sent him on his way. The next day, to the total disbelief of the Air Force, the same Cessna showed up again. Once again, the MP's surrounded the plane ... only this time there were two people in the plane. The same pilot jumped out and said, "Do anything you want to me, but my wife is in the plane and you have to tell her where I was last night!"

FUNNY ENGLISH NOTICES AROUND THE WORLD! --------------------------------------- Here are some signs and notices written in English that were discovered throughout the world. You have to give the writers an 'E' for Effort. We hope you enjoy them. In a Tokyo Hotel: Is forbidden to steal hotel towels please. If you are not a person to do such thing is please not to read notis. In a Bucharest hotel lobby: The lift is being fixed for the next day. During that time we regret that you will be unbearable. In a Leipzig elevator: Do not enter the lift backwards, and only when lit up. In a Belgrade hotel elevator: To move the cabin, push button for wishing floor. If the cabin should enter more persons, each one should press a number of wishing floor. Driving is then going alphabetically by national order. In a Paris hotel elevator: Please leave your values at the front desk. In a hotel in Athens: Visitors are expected to complain at the office between the hours of 9 and 11 A.M. daily. In a Yugoslavian hotel: The flattening of underwear with pleasure is the job of the chambermaid. In a Japanese hotel: You are invited to take advantage of the chambermaid. In the lobby of a Moscow hotel across from a Russian Orthodox monastery: You are welcome to visit the cemetery where famous Russian and Soviet composers, artists, and writers are buried daily except Thursday. In an Austrian hotel catering to skiers: Not to perambulate the corridors in the hours of repose in the boots of ascension. On the menu of a Swiss restaurant: Our wines leave you nothing to hope for. On the menu of a Polish hotel: Salad a firm's own make; limpid red beet soup with cheesy dumplings in the form of a finger; roasted duck let loose; beef rashers beaten up in the country people's fashion. Outside a Hong Kong tailor shop: Ladies may have a fit upstairs. In a Bangkok dry cleaner's: Drop your trousers here for best results. Outside a Paris dress shop: Dresses for street walking. In a Rhodes tailor shop: Order your summers suit. Because is big rush we will execute customers in strict rotation. A sign posted in Germany's Black forest: It is strictly forbidden on our black forest camping site that people of different sex, for instance, men and women, live together in one tent unless they are married with each other for that purpose. In a Zurich hotel: Because of the impropriety of entertaining guests of the opposite sex in the bedroom, it is suggested that the lobby be used for this purpose. In an advertisement by a Hong Kong dentist: Teeth extracted by the latest Methodists. In a Rome laundry: Ladies, leave your clothes here and spend the afternoon having a good time. In a Czechoslovakian tourist agency: Take one of our horse-driven city tours - we guarantee no miscarriages. Advertisement for donkey rides in Thailand: Would you like to ride on your own *** ? In a Swiss mountain inn: Special today -- no ice cream. In a Bangkok temple: It is forbidden to enter a woman even a foreigner if dressed as a man. In a Tokyo bar: Special cocktails for the ladies with nuts. In a Copenhagen airline ticket office: We take your bags and send them in all directions. On the door of a Moscow hotel room: If this is your first visit to the USSR, you are welcome to it. In a Norwegian cocktail lounge: Ladies are requested not to have children in the bar. In a Budapest zoo: Please do not feed the animals. If you have any suitable food, give it to the guard on duty. In the office of a Roman doctor: Specialist in women and other diseases. In an Acapulco hotel: The manager has personally passed all the water served here. In a Tokyo shop: Our nylons cost more than common, but you'll find they are best in the long run. From a Japanese information booklet about using a hotel air conditioner: Cooles and Heates: If you want just condition of warm in your room, please control yourself. From a brochure of a car rental firm in Tokyo: When passenger of foot heave in sight, tootle the horn. Trumpet him melodiously at first, but if he still obstacles your passage then tootle him with vigor. Two signs from a Majorcan shop entrance: - English well talking. - Here speeching American.

All too rarely, airline attendants make an effort to make the in-flight "safety lecture" and their other announcements a bit more entertaining. Here are some real examples that have been heard or reported: ***************************** On a Continental Flight with a very "senior" flight attendant crew, the pilot said, "Ladies and gentlemen, we've reached cruising altitude and will be turning down the cabin lights. This is for your comfort and to enhance the appearance of your flight attendants." ***************************** On landing, the stewardess said, "Please be sure to take all of your belongings. If you're going to leave anything, please make sure it's something we'd like to have." ******************************* There may be 50 ways to leave your lover, but there are only 4 ways out of this airplane" **************************** "Thank you for flying Delta Business Express. We hope you enjoyed giving us the business as much as we enjoyed taking you for a ride." ******************************* As the plane landed and was coming to a stop at Ronald Reagan, a lone voice came over the loudspeaker: "Whoa, big fella. WHOA!" ********************************* After a particularly rough landing during thunderstorms in Memphis, a flight attendant on a Northwest flight announced, "Please take care when opening the overhead compartments because, after a landing like that, sure as hell everything has shifted." ********************************** From a Southwest Airlines employee: "Welcome aboard Southwest Flight 245 to Tampa. To operate your seat belt, insert the metal tab into the buckle, and pull tight. It works just like every other seat belt; and, if you don't know how to operate one, you probably shouldn't be out in public unsupervised." *************************** "In the event of a sudden loss of cabin pressure, masks will descend from the ceiling. Stop screaming, grab the mask, and pull it over your face. If you have a small child traveling with you, secure your mask before assisting with theirs. If you are traveling with more than one small child, pick your favorite." ***************************** Weather at our destination is 50 degrees with some broken clouds, but we'll try to have them fixed before we arrive. Thank you, and remember, nobody loves you, or your money, more than Southwest Airlines." ********************************* "Your seat cushions can be used for flotation; and, in the event of an emergency water landing, please paddle to shore and take them with our compliments." *********************** "Should the cabin lose pressure, oxygen masks are in the overhead area. Please place the bag over your own mouth and nose before assisting children .. or other adults acting like children." **************************************** "As you exit the plane, make sure to gather all of your belongings. Anything left behind will be distributed evenly among the flight attendants. Please do not leave children or spouses." **************************************** And from the pilot during his welcome message: "Delta airlines is pleased to have some of the best flight attendants in the industry. Unfortunately, none of them are on this flight!" ******************************************** Heard on Southwest Airlines just after a very hard landing in Salt Lake City: The flight attendant came on the intercom and said, "That was quite a bump, and I know what y'all are thinking. I'm here to tell you it wasn't the airline's fault, it wasn't the pilot's fault, it wasn't the flight attendant's fault ...it was the asphalt." ********************************************* Overheard on an American Airlines flight into Amarillo, Texas, on a particularly windy and bumpy day: During the final approach, the Captain was really having to fight it. After an extremely hard landing, the Flight Attendant said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, welcome to Amarillo. Please remain in your seats with your seat belts fastened while the Captain taxis what's left of our airplane to the gate!" ************************************************** Another flight attendant's comment on a less than perfect landing:"We ask you to please remain seated as Captain Kangaroo bounces us to the terminal." *************************************************** An airline pilot wrote that on this particular flight he had hammered his ship into the runway really hard. The airline had a policy which required the first officer to stand at the door while the Passengers exited, smile, and give them a "Thanks for flying our airline." He said that, in light of his bad landing, he had a hard time looking the passengers in the eye, thinking that someone would have a smart comment. Finally everyone had gotten off except for a little old lady walking with a cane. She said, "Sir, do you mind if I ask you a question?" "Why, no, Ma'am," said the pilot. "What is it?" The little old lady said, "Did we land, or were we shot down?" ******************************************************* After a real crusher of a landing in Phoenix, the Flight Attendant came on with, "Ladies and Gentlemen, please remain in your seats until Capt. Crash and the Crew have brought the aircraft to a screeching halt against the gate. And, once the tire smoke has cleared and the warning bells are silenced, we'll open the door and you can pick your way through the wreckage to the terminal." ************************************************************ Part of a flight attendant's arrival announcement: "We'd like to thank you folks for flying with us today. And, the next time you get the insane urge to go blasting through the skies in a pressurized metal tube, we hope you'll think of US Airways." *********************************************************** A plane was taking off from Kennedy Airport. After it reached comfortable cruising altitude, the captain made an announcement over the intercom, "Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain speaking. Welcome to Flight Number 293, nonstop from New York to Los Angeles. The weather ahead is good and, therefore, we should have a smooth and uneventful flight. Now sit back and relax... OH, MY GOD!" Silence followed, and after a few minutes, the captain came back on the intercom and said, "Ladies and Gentlemen, I am so sorry if I scared you earlier. While I was talking to you, the flight attendant accidentally spilled a cup of hot coffee in my lap. You should see the front of my pants!" A passenger in Coach yelled, "That's nothing. You should see the back of mine!" ****************************************************** Heard on a Southwest Airline flight. "Ladies and gentlemen, if you wish to smoke, the smoking section on this airplane is on the wing and if you can light 'em, you can smoke 'em."

Love is being happy for the other person when that other person is happy, being sad for that person when they are sad, being together in great times and also sharing the bad. Love is the source of my inner strength. Love is being honest with ourselves at all times, being honest with that special person in our lives at all times, telling, listening and being respectful of the truth and never pretending that love is the complete source of our reality. Love is an understanding so complete that you feel as if you are part of the other person, accepting the other person for the way they are and not trying to change them to be something else. Love is the source of our unity and ultimately our divide. Love is the freedom to pursue your own desires while sharing them with that other person. The growth of that one person will ultimately lead to the growth of the other. Love will be the source of our success. Love is the excitement of planning things together. The excitement of doing things together. Love will always be the source of our future. Love is the eye of a storm and the calmness of a rainbow. Love to me is a passion we both share. Love is giving and taking in a daily situation, Trying to be patient with each others wants, needs and desires. Love will forever be the source for our mutual sharing. Love is knowing the other person will always be with you, regardless of what happens or what takes place in our lives. Missing the other person while they are away but remaining near in our hearts always. Love is undoubtedly the source of our security and your love will forever be the source of my life.......

Beauty is not based on how attractive we are to everybody else, but how attractive we are to ourselves, for one cannot think other people think they are full of beauty unless they know they are beautiful too."" I believe the personality and the soul is what makes a person beautiful, it does not always have to be the physical appearance." True beauty cannot be seen from the outside, it must be found within the soul of your love." Women are the most beautiful thing in the nature. Because she imbibe all beauties from nature and expresses her beauty in the manner of her talks, walks and looks. This perception of beauty, we can feel only by heart rather than eyes." The beauty of a woman is not in the clothes she wears, the figure that she carries, or the way she combs her hair. The beauty of a woman must be seen in her eyes, because that is the doorway to her heart - the place where love resides." "Beauty is like a tree; it grows from the inside out You don't love a woman because she is beautiful, she is beautiful because you love her." The best and most beautiful things cannot be seen or even touched, they must be felt with the heart."