What is your ideal man/woman?.

Thanks once gain siman for your exquisite reply. Much appreciated. Millenium

what are your new year resolutions?. Enlighten me with your comments nomads. Thanks Mr.Millenium

Mashallah, i love to see great knowledge being exposed to our nomads. Keep up the good work.

This is to all audiences on this forum.Have you been let down by a close friend, boyfriend, girlfriend, family member e.t.c?. How did it feel like and what did you do about it?. I have had this question in my head for quite some time and i thought it would be appropriate to address it during this new year. So holla back with your replies. thanks. Mr.Millenium

Do you ever ask yourself that question. What is your purpose in this world?. I do all the time so holla back with your replies people.

Thank you very much. I once again acknowledge you for your exquisite replies. Assante sana.

This is a very good comment you made. I appreciated your level of thinking and may god show you the path to righteousness!. Assalamu Aliakum Mr.Millenium

Worship has a principal role in Islam. The tive pillars of Islam, as the prophet named them, are (for both men and women): I. Shahada: that is to bear witness that there is no deity but God (Allah) and that Mohammad is the messenger of God. 2. Prayer: obligatory prayers are performed in a certain format five times during every day. These are the early morning, noon, after-noon, early evening (after sunset) and night. To perform prayer the Muslim man or woman must be in a state of Tahara (cleanliness or purity). This usually entails a ritual washing (wodou or ablution) of face (and mouth and nose), forearms, stroking head with water and washing the feet and toes. Ablution has to be repeated (renewed if broken by certain events including micturition, defecation, passing flatus, sleep and certain other conditions. Sex (or night dreams leading to orgasm) necessitates a full (ritual) bath. 3. Fasting: every year, for the full length of the month of Ramadan, daily abstinence from food, drink and sex from dawn to sunset is observed. 4. Zakat or alms: this is a tax amounting to two and one half percent of horded money owned for a full year. 5. Pilgrimage: the ritual journey to Kaaba (at Mekka) and remembrance of Abraham and his son Ismail, born to Hagar, should be made once in a life time at a special season if the Muslim can physically and financially afford it. We are omitting further details that the interested reader may easily pursue in specialised books. Needless to say that the pillars of Islam do not include the totality of Islam, for the pillars are only meant to carry a whole building. What we propose to cover in this chapter is the special rulings concerning certain situations peculiar to women and how they relate to the general outline of worship addressed to all Muslims, men and women.

When is sex not permitted : A. Menstruation It has been mentioned that vaginal sexual intercourse is not permitted while the woman is menstruating. Physical intimacy to any other degree is allowed during menstruation. The prophet said in this respect: "Do everything but intercourse." (Anas) Aisha, the prophet's wife, reported that when the prophet wanted to make love during her period, he would order her to Cover her private parts with a dress, and he made love excluding vaginal intercourse". (all six reporters ) B. Fasting Sex is also prohibited in the days of Ramadan while fasting. When fasting was first decreed abstinence included day and night. One day a muslim Arab went to the prophet saying: Apostle of God. I am doomed. Asked why? he said I had sex with my wife while fasting. The prophet advised: Do you have means to free a slave? The man said: No! The prophet said: Can you feed sixty needy people? The man said: No. The prophet went into his house and brought a basket full of dates, gave it to the man and said: Give this to the poor. The man said: I can't figure anyone poorer than our household. The prophet smiled and said: Then take it and feed it to your family. (Abu Huraira) After that, it was revealed in the Quran that sex is permissible during the night in Ramadan but not during the period of fasting from dawn to sunset: "Permitted to you on the night of the fasts is the approach to your wives, they are your garments and you are their garments. God knows what you used to do secretly among yourselves but He turned to you and forgave you. So now associate with them and seek what God has ordained for you". (2: 187) Kissing and intimacies like hugging are permitted provided they do not lead up to orgasm. Aisha, the prophet's wife reported: The prophet, peace and prayer be upon him, used to kiss in Ramadan.but he had perfect control over his desire (and so avoiding orgasm). Non orgasmic secretions that ensue upon sexual excitation (in men and women) are not incompatible with fasting. C. The Puerperium After childbirth or miscarriage sex is postponed until the puerperium is over and the lochial discharge ceases. The maximal period of puerperium is six weeks. The woman then takes her ritual bath and can resume prayer, fasting a.nd marital relations. D. Hajj and Umra As long as man or woman are in Ihram (intention at the start of hajj or umra, with special form of dress for men) sex or its physical or verbal prodramata are not permitted. Proposal to marry , as well as the marriage contract (and marriage itself) are not to be done until the rites are concluded and Ihram is over. The prophet said: "A person in Ihram is not to marry, get maited or propose to marry." (Muslim) E. Medical or ethical situations during which sex would be harmful or unwelcome. The Ritual Bath: (ghusl) After sexual intercourse a ritual bath is mandatory (for both men and Women). The same applies even if intercourse did not lead to orgasm, if the penis of the man has touched the vulva. Orgasmic experiences outside sexual intercourse, including night dreams, are treated on the same footing, by both men and women. It is reported that a lady called Um-Saleem asked the prophet: Does a woman have to take a (ghusl) bath If she experiences a night dream? The prophet answered: "Yes. If she sees the wetness (of orgasm). " (the two sheiks) After all these sexual phenomena, tht man or woman are described to be "junub" until this ritual bath is taken. It should be remembered that the same bath is due also after the cessation of menstruation and at the conclusion of the puerperium. The bath removes the status of' 'janabah ' , and enables the person to resume prayer, fasting and hajj and/or umra again. Of the rituals ofHajj, only "tawaf" necessitates "tuhr" (non-junub) as well as wodou (ablution). The other steps necessitate "tuhr" only. The same bath, "ghusl" is also performed prior to burial of a dead muslim male or female. The method of' 'ghusl is the same for men and women, the Water generously bathing all the body, except that a woman has the option not to undo her braids (or hair-do). provided the Water reaches the origins ofher hair. A woman asked the prophet peace be upon him: I do my hair into braids, do I have to undo them when I have "janabah"? The prophet answered: "It is enough to pour On your head a handful of water three times then generously flood water Over your body, and you have attained 'tuhr'. " (Ahmad; Muslim: Termizi) Husband and wife may share the same stock of water for their ghusl, and may do their ghusl together and from the same basin or container of water, as Aisha the prophet's wife, repOrted to do that with him. The "ghusl" can do for both tuhr and wodou (ablution). If water is not available, or its use is contraindicated by illness or other duress (for example extremely cold weather for someone who happens to have no means of warming some water), but the general rule of resorting to "tayammum" (tuhr and ablution using dry clean dust symbolically to wipe hands and face) is applied so that worship is not to be missed, until water becomes available. Prayers undertaken through tayammum need not be later repeated.

I have my views on this topic but i wanted to address this topic to the female audiences of this site.What do you think of female circumcision? Is it morally right? although it doesn't state anywhere in the quran that it is a must for females!. P.S I do apologise for touching a sensitive subject but i am keen to know your views. Thanks Millenium.

How can you post this in the first place. I think it is moraaly wrong and disgusting so dont even think about it!

I have my views on this topic but i wanted to address this topic to the female audiences of this site.What do you think of female circumcision? Is it morally right? although it doesn't state anywhere in the quran that it is a must for females!. P.S I do apologise for touching a sensitive subject but i am keen to know your views. Thanks Millenium.

Engagement is a provisional phase prior to marriage. It is not a binding contract, and if the fiancees find out during this period that they are not really suitable for one another then it can be broken. The engagement is no justification for the parties concerned to have access to each other's body or to enjoy physical intimacy. If broken, some jurists decree that presents given to the woman by her fiance should be returned to him, such as the engagement ring or other valuables. It is a pre-requisite for engagement that the woman be free from juridicial objections, such as being married or still during the ritual' 'waiting period', (idda) following a previous marriage. It is also unethical for a Muslim to propose to a woman already engaged, unless that engagement is broken for an independent reason or by consent of the first proposer to break the engagement. The free consent of both parties to the marriage is a juridicial necessity. In some patriarchal communities the decision is made by the father or guardian without heed to the girl's opinion. Such practice is unacceptable to Islam, and if the girl is not consenting the marriage contract is to be dissolved by law. A young woman once complained to the prophet that her father married her to his nephew without her consent. The prophet gave her the option of dissolving the contract, to which she answered: I accept what my father did, but I wanted to make the point to women that the decision is up to them and not to their fathers.

Marriage is the institution through which a man and a woman pair off and legitimately unite to form one unit of humanity. It is a root which branches off into the known blood relations such as maternity, paternity and fraternity and their ever widening circles of blood relatives referred to in Islam as the 'relations of the womb'. Marriage is mandatory in Islam for whoever can afford it. Commenting on a group of people who wanted to devote all their time for worship and thought they had no time for marriage and the duties it would impose on them, the prophet peace be upon him said: "Marriage is my tradition. He who rejects my tradition is not of me." (Bukhari; Muslim) Indeed marriage has been described as half of the religion. The Prophet said: "Whomever God has bestowed upon th eblessing of the good wife, then God secured for him one half of his religion. So let him heed God in the other half." (Tabarani; Hakim) "The best blessing the believer reaps after piety of God is a pious wife." (Ibn-Maga) The Quran points out to the prophet that marriage was the tradition that God prescribed to previous messengers:"We did send apostels before you and appointed for them wives and children..." (13:38) There are two main functions of marriage in Islam explicitly pointed out in the following two verses, and at the risk of repetition, we emphasize that Islam insists that marriage is the only legitimate venue for subserving these two functions. The first function is the unison between the two halves yearning to one another and attracted spiritually by the free choice of one another and physically by the call of the sexual drive seeking its legitimate expression. God considers this as one of His signs: "Amongst His signs is that He created consorts for you from amongst yourselves, so that you may find tranquility with them, and (He) set love and compassion between you. Verily in this are signs for people who reflect." (30:21) The second function is a corollary of the first and emanates from it. It is the preservation of the species by procreation: "And God has created for you consorts from amongst yourselves, and out of your consorts He created children and grand children for you, and provided you out of His bounty will they then believe in vain things and be ungrateful to God's favours?" (16:72) Both functions are essential, and a marriage contracted with the preset condition of 'no sex' or 'no pregnancy' is Islamically blemished, as we explained before.

Sex is the ultimate expression of love and is a total physical and emotional encounter. In a brief but beautiful expression the Quran refers, to this relation between husbands and wives saying: "They are your garments and you are their garments." (2:187) The sexual unison between husband and wife is more than seeking a relief from the urge of desire. Indeed the prophet taught that it is one of the charities in Islam. He said to his companions, enumerating examples of charitable deeds : "And when the one of you makes love (has sex) it is a rewardable charity. " His companions were surprised and asked him' 'How come the one of us answers the urge of his desire and out of this gets the reward of a charity. To which the prophet answered: Don't you see that if he does the same but in a forbidden situation it would be counted against him as a sin? And so if he does it in legitimacy it is counted for him as a charity." (Muslim) The sexual relation is a very special relation between consorts, and should be accorded the privacy it deserves. It is not befitting that either of them divulges this aspect of their life to anyone. The prophet peace be upon him emphasizes this ethic in the strongest terms. He said: "Amongst the lowest grades of people before God on the day of judgement, is the man going to his wife (and making sex) and she going to him: then either of them divulging their common secret." (Abu Said) Addressing a gathering of men and women the prophet looked to the men and said: "Would it be that the one of you locks his door and draws his curtains and seeks his need (sex) from his consort: and later when he goes out he talks to his friends about it?" He then turned to the women and said' 'Would it be that the one of you locks her door and draws her curtains and seeks her need from her consort: and later when she goes out she talks to her women friends about it? There was an air of admitting silence and a woman said It happens apostle of God. The prophet said: 'Never do that Or it would be like a male devil who encountered a female devil and copulated with her out in the middle of the road and then left her and went away. (Abu Said) In order to maintain the bliss and pleasantness of the relation, both husband and wife should aquire the hygienic and esthetic habits that keep them attractive to one another. It does not behove the woman only to beautify herself for her husband, but this is a reciprocal right. The prophet is reported to have rebuked a man who looked shabby and neglected to tidy his hair and clothing, stating that it was his wife's right that he looks at his best to her, as she to him. Ibn Abbas, a notable scholar of the first Islamic century, stated: Most certainly I am keen on making myself handsome to my wife, just as I like her to beautify herself for me in keeping with God's saying in the Quran that: "Women have rights even as they have obligations in an equitable way." (2:228) It is not only a woman's duty, but indeed also her privilege to look at her best in her husband's sight. Husbands away on a journey should announce their coming back rather than taking their wives by surprise, so that the wife has time to beautify herself before meeting her husband. Whenever the prophet's caravan arrived back at Madina, they would camp in the suburbs, send a messenger to announce their arrival, and go to their homes after suitable notice. One of his traditions says: "If you are in a journey do not enter your home all of a sudden so that the tuggy haired would comb and the unprepared get ready". (The five except Nissa'i) In modern times sexology has become a science by itself, and modern western societies almost congratulate themselves for at last recognizing woman's right to attain sexual satiety out of sexual intercourse. The 'right to orgasm' is amongst the latest in the inventory of rights claimed by the "Women's Lib." and other feminist movements. Fourteen centuries ago, Islam recognized that right, as evidenced by the saying of the prophet: "If any of you has sex with his wife let he be true to her. If he attains his pleasure before her then he shouldn't hurry her away until she also attains her pleasure." (Anas ) Standard writings in sexology over the past few decades have described the physiological human sexual response and classified it into the four phases of excitation, plateau, orgasm and resolution. Ideally these phases should coincide in both partners, otherwise there will be sexual dysharmony, often due to the man getting his orgasm while the woman is still eagerly awaiting, with inflamed desire, to also achieve her orgasm. As orgasm is followed by resolution where the male organ gets flacid and the man enters into a refractory period after his sexual desire has been satiated through orgasm, the conclusion of the act at that stage would be unfair to the woman having been aroused but not satisfied, and that is what the prophet warns against. The man should not just turn his back and go away or go to sleep, leaving his wife frustrated. The coital exercise should proceed until she is satisfied. An effective method of correcting this form of dyshan:nony is to spend time enjoying their intimacy and helping themselves to one another's bodies in totality, before moving on to genital intercourse. The pleasures of sex spread themselves over a much wider area than the genital region, as manifest in kissing, embracing and caressing the body especially over the erogenous zones of the female physique. This indeed is the normal and commendable approach to sex. It adds to the mechanistic element of sex, the emotional dimension of tender love and mutual affection beautifully portrayed in the Quran as: "They are your garments, and they are yours. " It also ensures that by the time the couple move on to genital introduction, the woman would have been aroused over a sufficient period of time and become so excited that she is already quite near her orgasm. In modern medical jargon this prelude is called the' 'foreplay', but again long before it was dreamt in the rest of the world of such women's rights, the prophet of Islam gave the same guidance, politely referring to foreplay as the "messenger", in his saying: "Let-not the one of you fall upon his wife like a beast (camel) falls. It is more appropriate to set a messenger afore the act" Amongst good sexual ethics also is that the couple should be sensitive to each others needs and limitations, and ups and downs. Even a virtuous excuse like deep involvement in worship is not accepted if the man forgets or ignores his wife's rights. In such a case it is the woman's right to protest. History reports the woman who went to Umar ibn al Khat tab (second caliph) consulting him: My husband fasts by day and prays all night. and I feel embarassed to complain seeing that he spends his time worshipping God. The man was summoned for a hearing. The final verdict was to have three nights for his own worship and to heed the needs of his wife during the rest of the week. Umar also asked his daughter Hafsa how long a woman should stand being away from her husband, Upon which he decreed that fighting troops should be given leave to come back home every six months. Similarly a woman should be responsive to her husband's call. Seeing that men are more prone to sexual arousal by a variety of visual stimuli as they move about all day, the prophet's advice was that the wife should always answer her husband's call: "The right of the husband is that when he calls his wife to sex she should not deny him herself." (Tialissi) The prophet also advised that whenever a man sees something that arouses his sexual desire, he should go and have sex with his wife.

Assalamu Alaikum brothers and sisters, I have added this topic coz i looked at previous topics addressing virginity and i am dismayed by the level of thinking that has been put forward towards the replies. Come on people you can do better than that!. Well let me tell you that for all you brothers and sisters who have kept their bodies clean and pure for marriage then i will say mashallah. Allah has a great reward for you in the akhira. For our lost and unfortunate brothers and sisters then plz ask god for foregiveness and dont repeat the mistake by carrying on and still sleeping with a person you are not legally married to.

WHO DO YOU THINK IS GOING TO WIN THE PREMIERSHIP. GIVE ME YOUR REPLIES.

Being a mummys boy, i have been given alot of lectures by my family. One of the most important advices was to follow your heart so here is a little reflection of the advice i got from family: WISE WORDS BY Mr. Millenium This is the advice my mother gave me, Dont try and climb the impossible tree, Its a cruel world out there you must learn fast, Live each day - Dont dwell on the past. When love comes long, you'll know if it's true, By the specialway they care for you, Love is the most precious thing on earth, You can't buy it or fake it - can't weigh its worth. Like a fragile flower, love grwos with care, Love is giving, forgiving - with some to spare.

Being a mummys boy, i have been given alot of lectures by my family. One of the most important advices was to follow your heart so here is a little reflection of the advice i got from family: WISE WORDS BY Mr. Millenium This is the advice my mother gave me, Dont try and climb the impossible tree, Its a cruel world out there you must learn fast, Live each day - Dont dwell on the past. When love comes long, you'll know if it's true, By the special way they care for you, Love is the most precious thing on earth, You can't buy it or fake it - can't weigh its worth. Like a fragile flower, love grows with care, Love is giving, forgiving - with some to spare.