I've been foruming since 2000 or 2001 I think and of course my life has not been stagnant, but one thing I love is how the old forumers still know one another and keep in touch and have friendships built even when they don't come to the forums anymore... Some of of my closest friends I met on these forums... or maybe the somalinet ones... what can i say, i'm grateful to Allah and then the internet! Fi Amaani'Laah

Bukurr... what parts of the Somali identity have been lost with the embracing of Islam? Obviously if one wants to live by Islamic principles, they'll have to ditch certain cultural things that go against the religion, but I don't believe this equals losing the Somali identity!! Unless of course, the individual has inferiority complex and purposely wants to ditch their Somali identity... Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by Karl_Polanyi: wow. wow. wow. this is great wisdom and the only time i understand what you are speaking about. allahuakbar. Loooool! Option 1: point fingers, complain ==> make no difference! Option 2: figure out your talent, use it ==> make a difference! Fi Amaani'Laah

That's where the ethical question comes up... is the product really what you claim or are you merely speaking to make profit and you could careless about honesty? I was a marketing major and subhanna Allah, I can see how Allah has blessed me with the ability to convince people of ideas if I believe in them... it's scary sometimes... but dad baa bohol kadhaci kara if you speak with passion about something negative... Fi Amaani'Laah

Oh, we are going back to Somalia?????!!!!!

Originally posted by Xu: quote: The 13th factor is the Morning and afternoon Dhiker. These are prescribed sayings that our Prophet SAWS had taught us to say at dawn and sunset. Saying these adhkaar can put a lot of ease and happiness into your life. It can reduce your sins, increase your hasanaat and protect you from Sheitaan. I am sorry if this sounds really dumb, but what do you exactly say when you do the Dhiker? There is a little book called Hisn alMuslim sis, it has many of the remembrance of the Prophet salla Allahu alayhi wassalam, google hisn alMuslim.... here is a link to the morning/evening adhkar... and these are the ones the prophet Sallah Allahu alayhi wassalam used to say on regular basis... they truly bring about ease, happiness and tranquility... http://www.islamic-knowledge.com/Hisn_al_Muslim/Remembrance_Morning_Evening.htm Fi Amaani'Laah

Assalaamu alaykum, Another answer for the question of how to attain and maintain khushuuc insha Allah... We need to observe our lives, if we are living a life that is heedless of Allah subhanahu wa ta'ala and full of disobedience, then how then do we expect to connect with Him the 4 minutes we stand in Salah? If I'm out backbiting, cheating and lying, then I will definitely not have khushuuc in my Salah.. However, if my life is generally one that brings me closer to Allah, then I'll find the sweetness of khushuuc bi idhni Allah... Our Salah in Ramadan is definitely not like our salah in other times... our salah in the masjid, in jama'a, or after reading Quran is definitely not like the one you do in 5 minutes while hanging out at the mall... Listen to a lecture on halaltube.com by Abdulnasir Jangda called Khushu' in Focus... I found it very beneficial... Fi Amaani'Laah

Salaam My jeans/pants under my abaya feel the best at any season... i got sick of all the glittery black abayas with unwanted materials hanging from them... so i opted for fabrics from JoAnn's and a great tailor... i even find scarves that go with my abayas! Cheap and totally authentic since it's my creation... I love it!!! Try fabric stores sistah... Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by Che -Guevara: Honest-How can one respect you if you don't respect yourself? I don't understand! What does this mean? Prince of Punt... lol, I'll go and ask them that question! In the mean time, I'll worry about how to make money offering a service in demand! Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by Prince of Punt: and let's be honest the sisters in the aforementioned stories would not marry a Somali brother even if he was a Sahaba, any of those excuses used by them where they degrade the Somali male demographic is just them second guessing their decision, and through the demonisation of Somali men they justify to themselves that this lifetime companion they have chosen was the right one. This feeling last for a year or two and then the inner demons start chipping away, because nobody can sustain an act for too long. The proper sisters who married reverts and don't feel the need to justify themselves or explain their decision by degrading their fathers and brothers are usually the ones who are at peace with themselves and their surroundings. If i married an Indonesian muslim girl, i would do this, because i most likely LOVE HER AS A PERSON, and i'm ATTRACTED TO HER LOOKS, why the hell would i need to start talking crap about Somali women in general when they have nothing to do with how i feel about this Indonesian sister? If i degraded Somali women to justify my decision to marry an Indonesian girl, wouldn't it reflect badly on myself? Wouldn't it look like i have personal issues and a big chip on my shoulder? Yeah it would! Therefore is my opinion on the Somali community and Somali women really credible as a result? A BIG FAT NO!! And actually I totally agree with these two paragraphs here... There are some Somalis completely not interested in other Somalis simply because they are Somali... I call this identity crisis... and I was also not speaking for those... May Allah protect us from such issues and give us confidence in ourselves and the good ones of our people... Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by Prince of Punt: You expect to find a pious brother by going to the club?, hang in the mall?, visit a one-ethnic group dominated mosque?, yeah good luck with that! Unbelievable, i would never utter nonsense like; ''Where are they, where are the good Somali sisters?'', because i have seen hundreds of them, including my own kin, and all of them with good successful Somali men. The fact that there are some Somali brothers marrying revert sisters doesn't mean i have to start wondering why they couldn't find a ''good Somali woman'', that's such a logical fallacy. and let's be honest the sisters in the aforementioned stories would not marry a Somali brother even if he was a Sahaba, any of those excuses used by them where they degrade the Somali male demographic is just them second guessing their decision, and through the demonisation of Somali men they justify to themselves that this lifetime companion they have chosen was the right one. This feeling last for a year or two and then the inner demons start chipping away, because nobody can sustain an act for too long. The proper sisters who married reverts and don't feel the need to justify themselves or explain their decision by degrading their fathers and brothers are usually the ones who are at peace with themselves and their surroundings. If i married an Indonesian muslim girl, i would do this, because i most likely LOVE HER AS A PERSON, and i'm ATTRACTED TO HER LOOKS, why the hell would i need to start talking crap about Somali women in general when they have nothing to do with how i feel about this Indonesian sister? If i degraded Somali women to justify my decision to marry an Indonesian girl, wouldn't it reflect badly on myself? Wouldn't it look like i have personal issues and a big chip on my shoulder? Yeah it would! Therefore is my opinion on the Somali community and Somali women really credible as a result? A BIG FAT NO!! There are millions of happy and unhappy Somali Couples versus a few hundred Happy and unhappy mixed couples, by the end of 2100 there will be 100 million Somali men and women, so i really don't see why you are looking for a solution to a non-issue. and lol@ you actually taking NNC's hearsay comment as the 'truth', this is just her lashing back at Scarface 's comments. This whole debate is just another example in the epic Somali 'battle of the Sexes'. The ''Megalomaniacs'' of the Y-chromosome side seek to dominate the women in everything they do and hence dispute their god given right to marry whomever they wish, because according to them that's a exclusive Somali male priveledge. The ''What have you done for me Lately?'' XX-chromosome side because of various reasons such as lack of appreciation, or ''he doesn't bring us flowers'' want to press home the point that there are plenty of fish in the Sea. yawn walahi! By going to the club! Are you serious? Is it me or are assumptions being made here? Walaalo when we say the Somali sisters/brothers can marry who ever they choose, we are completely ignoring that we have parents that would really hate for us to marry outside our race. If we are interested in pleasing our parents while not compromising our interests we are going to run into a wall that acts as a barrier in meeting suitable spouses. Yes there is a problem when people talk like Somali brothers and sisters run into each others randomly in the streets, at work places, coffee shops and even masaajid. There are traditional and Islamic ways of meeting and going about the process of marriage that many Somalis have drifted away from while still wanting to keep things traditional and/or Islamic. Some of my close friends have married reverts and they are happy and I definitely don't see it as a problem. But I see a problem when I see some of my sincerely interested to marry pious sisters preferring only Somali brothers but not knowing how to meet them! I hope you understand where I'm coming from, because if you did you really would not have assumed that I argue for the clubbing sisters! Subxanna Allah, bal maxaa igalay naag club joogta iyo guurkeeda! Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by Prince of Punt: It amuses me when some people try to justify the decisions of these sisters, with the reason that there aren't enough 'good Somali men' around, when its their god given right to marry whomever they wish to hitch with. The reason a revert would find it easier to approach the Somali community than lets say a Pakistani/Moroccan or Kurdish community is because Somali men don't resort to twisted things like intimidation or worse honor killings, matter fact in terms of the Global Islamic community, traditionaly we are probably one of the most liberal male groups, yet when i read similar topics on Islamic forums it's always us being demonised for whatever reason. I'm afraid my point was totally missed! I can repeat though, no problem. I did not say there are NO good Somali brothers... I said, WHERE are they? Where do the sisters find them? The problem to me is the medium in which they meet and interact. We are mentioning stories of sisters not wanting Somali men because they don't speak Somali and Somali brothers becoming baby dadies with non-Muslims and I'm thinking: are we going to judge one another based on what a number of inexperienced/foolish/ignorant ones do? It becomes a session of blaming then... and I was more interested in problem/solution typa discussion here... Like, what is the real root cause of the problem (if it is a problem, and i actually see some of it as a problem) and what can we do to solve it? Insha Allah I made some sense! Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by chocolate & honey: Well, the District I work for is offering a new program where parents take a class once a week for 7 weeks and at the end of the 7 weeks they earn a diploma. I taught one of the classes and it is pretty informative.It makes a huge difference. The parents who graduated from the class are much more involved now. But I woder if those parents would come if they werent offered transportation(a taxi to pick them up and drop them off), a nice dinner and a potential scholorship. Masha Allah, may Allah bless your efforts abaayo... Allah put you in the right spot walaahi. I think the solution to these issues we are having as Somalis being new and totally uninformed immigrants is for the professionals to step up and become creative in the way we offer our expertise to our communities... there are horror stories in every field and the Somali professionals can get so much out of contributing to the community whether it is reward from Allah, or a very bright career future that puts them in the sought after caliber... Fi Amaani'Laah

Originally posted by Mr. Gello: Since it’s the Somali-women hate season, I thought I might as well add to the hatred by voicing something which has bugged me for sometime now. Lately there has been a tendency for Somali women to marry Muslim reverts. Although as a practicing man, I have nothing but love and respect for the marriage of Muslim sisters to Muslim brothers. I am concerned by the extent to which Somali women throw themselves towards any new revert to Islam in the hope of a marriage made in heaven. This is a worrying phenomenon and I think its very important we safe-guard the marriage of Somali women to Somali men. Why are young Somali sisters intent on marrying any new revert. What’s wrong with the plenty of good Somali men out there? As a Somali man, I have to admit, Somali men have plenty of short-comings but this shouldn’t mean that Somali women have marry other men of different races to find a successful Muslim men. My suggestion is Somali women need to be optimistic and realize there are plenty of successful Somali men out there! there are plenty of successful Somali men out there! Marrying other races induces nothing but problems and we need to put a stop to this worrying phenomenon before its gets out of hand! Cheers Mr. Gello And where are the plenty of practicing Somali brothers willing to marry these girls? I only read your opening and jumped to responding, sorry if I repeat what others might have said... But really, I see a looooot of amazing sisters whose simple desire is to get married to a practicing Somali man... someone who has courage to do it the Islamic way... my Somali brothers are not stepping up to these sisters... but the non-Somalis are, like flock... Whether you are Somali or Non, there are problems in marriage... so I would not discourage this phenomena for that particular reason... I know the desire to marry within your culture is a natural one... and walaahi a lot of these sisters would rather have a Somali man, but they just don't see them... how can we then blame them? Should we ask them to approach the men? Should we ask them to become second wives to already taken great Somali men? Or should we ask them to remain single when they know their their natural feelings have kicked in? Or should we think about another creative solution to this serious problem? (If you consider it a problem that is) Both our men and our women need a paradigm shift in the way they approach marriage and the PROCESS of marriage! Of course this applies to those who sincerely want marriage and won't compromise on the blessings that come from Allah when done properly! Fi Amaani'Laah

Loooool@ Prince Punt and 2+2=5... What books are ya'll writing? Now I'm interested to know! And please don't include me in this dagaal!