I can’t say I’ve ever had a broken heart. Oh, wait, I tell a lie, man. When I was six, our neighbours had a lovely daughter. She was the same age as me and she had the loveliest eyes I’ve ever seen. They were like two tiny hazel crystals. I wanted to pluck them out and play with them. I made all sorts of excuses to nip out and run across the road to her house. At first, she was always happy to see me but then fat Ali moved next door to her house and she became his best friend. She started giving me the cold shoulder and making a point of hugging Ali or laughing very loud whenever I walked past. Didn’t she know that I loved her? Didn’t she know I’ve prepared a tiny metal box to store her eyes in for all eternity (I would have stored them in my heart but didn’t think it was a safe enough place)? A few weeks after the arrival of fat Ali, my mother bought me a cat. I instantly fell in love with MY cat and forgot about our next-door neighbour. My mother made me promise not to pluck the cat’s eyes out though. But, even the cat broke my heart, man. She’d sneak out at night when I’m fast asleep and go cavorting with the neighbourhood’s tomcats. For the next six years I avoided contact with any females and forced myself not to look them in the eyes (lest I fall in love with them). Then, all of a sudden, with no warning at all, puberty struck! It was much easier not to look females in the eyes and keep my gaze down after that. By the way, I feel your pain, brother..

Borderline pornography that!

I’m still finding it hard to work this place out, man. It’s not very lively, is it? Seems to be working in little bursts! Well, I’m bored at work and I have the time to spout some rubbish with like-minded individuals. Any takers? I don’t wanna wait in vain for your posts....

I have not followed this subject and do not have enough information about its validity. However, if as the articles claim, there is oil in parts of Somalia, the West will strive to reconcile all parts of the old Somalia to persevere with unity. A precedent has already been set in Sudan where the war between the government and the rebels of the south has more or less ceased because of OIL. The Sudanese government agreed to give the South more autonomy and the South seems to be happy with this arrangement. It’s strange that after more than twenty years of fighting for freedom the South has yielded so easily. But, oil is oil I suppose and politicians on both sides have seen the benefits such a valuable commodity would bring to their people. Would the Somali politicians have the same foresight? I somehow doubt it.

I don’t think he’ll be defeated. He has staked his future on this conflict. This has not been the case in Lebanon and Somalia. If things get so bad and the Americans see they’re not going to win those “ hearts and minds”, they’ll organise a strategic withdrawal which will be accompanied with the usual fanfare of propaganda and spin. To most outside observers it will look like a defeat but to the very important American voters it will be shown as a great victory for liberal democracy in it’s fight against the powers of “evil”. The talk of defeat and victory afterwards will be a mere quibble over semantics.

Like I said, I understand why she had to do it. The baby was hungry and needed to be fed, it’s not “take your top off for the boys” type of scenario. You can’t blame me for being embarrassed though; I would have been embarrassed had it been a western lady doing the same thing, let alone a Somali woman. As for staring, well, I didn’t stare but I would be lying if I said I didn’t want to. Not for her beauty, not because I’m a pervert, but just because it was a surreal type of situation to be involved in and I couldn’t believe my eyes. I need to start doing some work soon! :confused:

I do not do drugs. I do not approve of drugs. I have never tried drugs (well, not that many anyway). I’m naturally high, man. Sometimes, just sometimes, I sniff uunsi.

Heh. How ironic that a thread which attempted to draw people’s attention to the problems caused by personal attacks and digression should end up as just that! I am going to slow down soon, I’m going to slow down soon, I’m going to slow down soon! It’s just the novelty of being here, the novelty of being here, the novelty of being here....* sigh*

Dear Agony Aunt, “I was with my girl friend for about 11 months; we love each other like husband and wife” Heh. But seriously, you say you’ve been with this girl for 11 months! You “loved” each other like husband and wife? I hope that does not mean what I think it means. If it does, then I can see why your friends would blame you and say that you’re wrong. If it doesn’t then it’s still a shame that you’ve invested that much time on one person and did not attempt to sort out your differences amicably. From your post above, it sounds as if she’s still keen to carry on with the relationship. The points about her parents finding her a new “husband” might be her attempts to get you to get your act together and marry the poor girl. Forgive me if I’m making a lot of assumptions here but you have not given us enough details in order for us to form a fair opinion of you or her. Therefore, I have no choice but to side with the girl - as I always do in such subjects. If you really don’t want to be with her then you really have to confront her and give her your reasons. Be gentle but firm and she’ll hopefully realise there is no point in bullying you into being with her. Do I sound like I have lots of time on my hands to post on every topic on this board? Erm, I do.

Hate is a very strong word. I don’t hate anything or anyone. On the rare occasions when I’m lost for things to do and boredom starts to creep in, I start to lose my temper and I’m ready to lash out just so I can get rid of the awful boredom. The anger, happiness or worry that follows keeps me going for days. I also dislike the Somali scarves that women wear (maqramad or whatever it’s called). When I become president of Africa, I’m going to ban those things. By the way, I’m finding it very hard to find my way around this place. Are things always slow here or are you all huddled in the corner reciting voodoo curses at this impertinent stranger that dared to invade your domain?

a dozen sand barrels, man. I have sand from all over the place. American sand, British sand, French sand and bits from many exotic countries! I’m thinking of packaging them in special bottles and selling them on e-bay. Would you like to express your patriotism by buying a bottle of your finest English/Scottish/Welsh/Canadian or American sand, man? Cheap price for a valuable product. It can take pride of place in your living room and you can display your true patriotism to all and sundry. I have a very limited supply of SOMALI sand! Yes, that’s right, Somali sand. You’ll have to be very quick if you want to own some of that precious commodity. You do a deal with me and in an instant; you will have your own piece of Somalia/Somaliland/Puntland! No bullets will be fired and nobody will be hurt (well, apart from those trying to buy the bottles before you). Who wants to start the bidding?

"and i belive there are alot of way not using condom if the woman wanna protect her self from the sperms i guess we all grown up in here so anwyayz thats all i can say macsalama." I wonder what those "other" ways are? As for this debate about the use of condoms amongst Somalis, I think it’s been covered from the religious point of view by many posters above. But, how about the practical, day-to-day, point of view? The point that many of you are making is that many Somalis who take part in sex outside marriage are ignorant of their religious duties and need education on that front. But, if they’re ignorant on that side, are they not also ignorant on the proper use of condoms? Do they actually get presentations on the correct way of using those things or is it just a public relations exercise showing that the West/Aid Agencies/Somali governments are doing their best to combat AIDS? Although I don’t agree with the use of condoms, I think those opposing the idea are not doing enough to prove their case. They need to take the initiative and start educating the Somali population on the subject. To turn it into a West versus East debate does not help anybody.

A few days ago while I was on my way home from work, I got on a crowded bus and sat next to a Somali lady with a baby in her arms. I sat there reading my newspaper and minding my own business when this lady proceeded to expose her breast and feed her baby! I felt embarrassed and kept on staring at my newspaper (couldn’t read anything in it of course). My embarrassment had nothing to do with my views on the subject by the way. I’m not sure whether I approve of breast-feeding in public or not. I can see the reasons why someone would do it and can also see the reasons why someone shouldn’t do it. To the guys on here, what would have been your reaction had you been in my shoes? Would you talk to the woman? Would you get up and move away or would you sit there as if nothing had happened? How about you girls? Would you breast-feed in public?

I agree with most of what’s being said above, however, some people reading that will take it as being an excuse not smile or laugh at all. Not laughing excessively should not mean not laughing at all. There is no point in having a frown on your face all the time but there is also no point in flashing your teeth at everyone for no reason. All in moderation I suppose.

Thanks for the welcome. I better answer all the questions on that list! - Where you're from, I’m in the UK (from Burco via a couple other places) - Your sex (for those with unisexual names) all man, baby, all man. - Occupation (you can lie about this if you like ) I’m a beans counter (in other words, I’m half an accountant) - What you do when you think people aren't looking? I pick my nose and post on online discussion boards - Favourite music: I listen to anything and everything as long as it sounds good. The only type of music I dislike is the stuff Buddhist monks chant. - General interests, etc. I’m not going to repeat what I wrote in my CV (that’s a resume for the north Americans amongst us) because it was all lies, I was young and naïve back then you see. These days, I’m only interested in reading old books and arguing about world politics.

Is this really a men versus women issue or is it just a Somali issue? I personally think it’s a cultural thing; if you stop a non “westernised” Somali person in the street and ask them for something as simple as the nearest corner shop, they’ll reply to you with a question; “maxad ka doonaysa dukanka?” If you have the patience to indulge their curiosity and reply saying that you ran out of milk, they’ll come back with another question asking you where you live and what tribe you’re from and basically want to know the whole story of your life! Now, some people feel offended by this invasion of privacy and reluctantly answer all these questions or make an excuse to make a quick getaway. Others know it’s just the Somali way and that these guys (male or female) don’t mean to offend. It’s not a “xamlimo” or “faarax” thing. It’s natural Somali curiosity.

This is my first ever post to this discussion board (forum). I’m glad you started this thread because I spent the last couple of days trying to work out which thread I should sprinkle some of my wisdom on but couldn’t decide. They’re all full and my few words would have been like a drop in an ocean on them. I’m in the UK and right now, I’m supposed to be working (I am at work). I’m male, old and bored. Anyway, what else goes on here? And what’s up with the time? Is this an American site? Form an orderly queue and welcome me aboard with hugs and kisses, mate.