NGONGE

Nomads
  • Content Count

    21,328
  • Joined

  • Last visited

Everything posted by NGONGE

  1. Tsk tsk tsk :rolleyes: I go away for a week and come back to find you guys have changed what was originally a rant into some sort of serious discussion! Can we please just go back to pulling each other's hair and throwing our toys from the pram? :mad:
  2. "Don't worry I'm not Somali" That phrase makes our guys out to be thick! If it's this easy to get a somali girl, why are the Somali guys not using this phrase too? It's not as if most of the guys who go to these clubs speak good somali anyway. Hmmm..come to think of it, this phrase makes Somali girls sound thick too. "Don't worry, I'm going to marry you".."Don't worry..I'll help out in bringing up that baby".. Seems like all of them are as bad as each other. Anyway, clubs are so sooo last century. :rolleyes:
  3. Ok straight up, the first thoughts that came to my mind when I saw this post was and I'm being honest here-Ngonge sounds faaaaaaaaaaar off from a husband cause he's always in on SOL flirting with the xalimoos. lol@Khayr. It's always the guys who fail to work out that I'm married. The girls on the other hand, worked it out straight away. I think it's on account of my shiny shoes and clean clothes. Ever since I arrived on this forum, they've been humming the "You're too good to be true..can't take my eyes of you" song non-stop. :rolleyes: As for our latest arrival (he's got two older sisters already), we finally decided to call him WALEED. I wanted to go for the name Haruun (which would have followed your suggestion) but my sister-in-law beat me to it. :mad: Thanks to you all for your kind suggestions and encouraging words.
  4. A sort of an Uncle Tom. The type that would start shuffling at the sight of a white man and keep saying “ Yes, Messah” “ No, Messah”...Something like an Uncle Tom I suppose. Come on work it out! A successful black man who made his name in the darkest days of segregation and racism must be a house negga, right? :rolleyes:
  5. Seriously, even after spending all that money. I don't give women with extensions and shit a second look at all. It doesn’t sound, as if you would need to give them a second look, saaxib. Having checked out their extensions and shit (sic), it seems like you’re still having a long first look.
  6. Heh. Our brave forces have completed the invasion and forced the enemy to surrender. Our victory was so decisive even those we beat are congratulating our heroic general for a job well done. We didn’t even have to raise a hand in anger or fight. All it took is the mention of a little baby that forced the enemy to capitulate and coo in appreciation. Comrades, lets dedicate this memorable victory to the baby. To the baby. Thanks Bee.
  7. I could only imagine Rudeboy looking lost and amused at the comments of Bill Cosby. He would probably say something along these lines: Why you callin da guy in da picture Bill Cosby, blud? Dat is Dr Huxtible, ya get me? He’s a old fart, blud. What does he know about music? Aks him to read the lyrics of Tupac, blud, aks him. I bet you he don’t know, ya get me? He talking about civil right movement and all dat nonsense, he talking about grandfather struggle but what does he know about da struggle of da Rude boys? Aks him to tell you who killed Tupac and Biggy, blud? He is an old man who knows nothing, blud, nothing. He’ll probably say some black guys killed Tupac and Biggy. WRONG, star, wrong. I’s heard from my mate who’s a very good DJ in West London, dat Tupac and Biggy was killed by dem heavy metal geezers, blud. It stands to reason, ya get me? Da heavy metal guys can’t sell dier rubbish music anymore because everybody listen to hip hop and everybody loves Tupac and Biggy. So da heavy metal crew got togeder and killed Tupac and biggy, blud. For real. Dese old people always think they is right, blud. Dey is not in the street to see da daily struggle of da brothers and sisters, star. Dey don’t know how hard a man got to work to make money to buy hisself stuff to make him look good, blud. I’s remember when I’s worked in my paper round and I’s had to wake up early every morning to deliver dem papers, blud. It was hard work but I got nuff money to buy me a fubu top and pierce my ear to look bling, ya get me? What does Dr Huxtible know about all a dat, blud? Nothin I tell you, blud, nothing. So he should shut up and never talk about tings he knows nothing about, ya get me?
  8. This time I got the score wrong but the result was right. Greece all the way, baby. :cool:
  9. 58, this is not a trial, saaxib. At least not yet anyway, it was just a hearing. As for the immunity part, according to international law and the Geneva convention he had diplomatic immunity as a captured president in a war. But, the clever Americans have "handed" him over to the now "sovereign" government of Iraq and that government decided to regard him as a criminal. Again, according to international law, everything here is legitimate because the United Nations have recognised the new government of Iraq. Now the second part, is it a fair trial? Of course not. Is Sadam right by referring to the court as a theatre? Absolutely. I'm not a lawyer so I'm not going to attempt to explain the mumbo jumbo of due process and being innocent until proven guilty. Like I said, I'm not going to try explaining it but the only thing I'll say is that despite the fact that the whole world seems to know of all of Saddam's atrocities, those prosecuting him will still have to present incontrovertible evidence that he had planned, participated in or approved some of those crimes. Hearsay is not enough for conviction. The above is all the more important because Iraq wants to present itself to the world as a new country, a country that is the opposite of everything Saddam's Iraq represented. They need to start as they mean to go on. If they bungle Saddam's trial and let their lust for blood and revenge take over they'll prove Saddam right when he said it's nothing but a theatre. I can't say I have sympathy for Saddam nor that I'm happy to see the satisfaction on the faces of the Americans at the humiliation of someone who for a very long time was a symbol of Islamic leadership (no, not in that way). The whole thing stinks.
  10. ^^^ Your dream woman stunk too much nobody could manage to get close enough to take her photo, saaxib. Never fear though, if armpits is your thing, armpits I bring. Brace yourselves, people...
  11. ^^^ I hate it when people brush right past me as if I didn’t exist. :mad:
  12. NGONGE and Maansoor, tease the women in a different way if you want, but not by throwing half-baked truth around the forums. This is because, some impressionable kids that are roaming these forums might take your propaganda seriously, have you guys stopped and thought about that for a second? Oh, stop being soft, man. These are big girls and they can take all the tosh that we throw their way and then some. We both have stated that whatever we wrote was a joke and hopefully none of the girls took offence (if they did then it must be their hormones.heheheh :rolleyes: ). Impressionable kids might indeed take our propaganda seriously, but I’m sure that the feminist movement’s hero, uncle Q would do his bit and tell them not to believe a word the naughty NGONGE and Maansoor write. Oh, before you ask, I wrote this in a hurry and might regret reading it later. It’s all a stream of consciousness, saaxib. ** Stops and thinks about the above for a second ** ** Lowers his head in shame ** ** Sees an orange ** ** Starts thinking about peeling the orange **
  13. well, the attraction of this sort of relationship is that its safe, because you are in control. its like looking through a one-way mirror. u can pretend to be some1 you are not! ANYONE I’m not sure about the safety of such relationships. How safe is it to interact with strangers that you’ve never met and are only communicating with them through a computer screen? Lets assume it’s safe. Lets say you meet someone online (like my darling raula) and commence to have a cyber relationship with them, what’s so bad about that? Surely it will only become infidelity the minute you decide that you’ve had enough of the cyber stuff and are now ready to meet that person in real life and pursue a real relationship. The fact that it’s safe contradicts the assumption that it’s infidelity, wouldn’t you say? Here comes the X-rated bit (children and young girls, avert your gaze now): For it to be regarded as infidelity you would have to either meet that person in real life or start having late night web cam sessions with lots of oohs, aaahs and a bit of striptease. If your real life partner is dumb enough not to notice or hear any of that, lucky you I say. Children, you can read back now: Here is a bit of advice for all of you from uncle NGONGE: When engaging in cyber relationships, make sure you own good and powerful anti-virus software. You never know what sort viruses and worms these people might pass on to you. :rolleyes: Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight Won't somebody help me chase the shadows away Gimme gimme gimme a man after midnight Take me through the darkness to the break of the day
  14. Way to go Mom. Plant the seeds for an emotional disorder, why don't you? I hope the girl wins her lawsuit... she can use the money to pay for counselling She’s a 22-year-old woman. A bit too old to be wrapped up with cotton wool, don’t you think? (Well, unless the cotton wool would help with the swelling maybe). What is up with madoow and timo? Wherever they are--be in Africa or Caribbeans--they are beyond obsession of hating the way their natural hair looks. It’s a funny picture. It’s just an allergic reaction, people. In most cases this can be treated and the person goes back to being their normal selves again. Most of you are turning it into some big drama. She’s a woman after all and women do everything in their power to try to look good. It’s not about being black or green, saaxib. So, get of your high horses and clam down. She didn’t try to get plastic surgery or anything of the sort, she only tried t dye her hair. Many of our Somali women do it with Henna (even some men do it), does that mean they want to “change what Allah (swt) gave them?” :confused:
  15. NGONGE

    Going Home!

    When I started this topic I was not implying that I would never go back home. I’m sure I will, several times. But, my point was that not many people would be able to go back and stay back. Even those talking about finding jobs there or starting their own businesses, what guarantees do they have that the Somalia they’ll be going to will be a mirror image of the one they dream about? One of the sisters above mentions a friend of hers who refuses to go back until breakfast cereals are readily available in Somalia. That of course sounds shallow but the idea of comfort and maintaining an accustomed to standard of living, should not be scoffed at easily. It’s not even just the comforts that you’ll miss, it’s the hobbies, the like-minded people and even in terms of worship and the pursuit of knowledge, I doubt if any of it will be easily available to you. As for building up the country, how are you going to achieve that? Why do you assume that you’ll be welcomed and allowed to run things the minute you got off that plane? Granted, there will be exceptions to this; people who amassed enough money to influence things and receive respect. So, how is it going to work out? We already see the people who go back and try to recreate a mini Arabia/Europe/America in their parts of Somalia. Even the new houses are built in the Western styles. This leads me to believe that these people are not going back and accepting that things in Somalia are not going to be the same as in the West (or any other richer places). They’re going there (rightly) thinking of going back HOME yet wanting all the comforts of the outside world. Will they be able to reconcile both things? Will they be able to choose one over the other? To say I’m going back to Somalia because it’s my country of origin is not reason enough for someone who’s been away for more than a decade. You’ve got to know why you’re going back and what to do once you’re there. Does anyone have any solid plans?
  16. ^^^^ I aim to please, dear. Though I don’t see what you find attractive in this caricature of a man. Oh, well, the thread is called “weird” turn ons I suppose. This one is much much better though..feast your eyes and drool away.. :rolleyes:
  17. ^^^ My aim was to tease and get a playful reaction from our staunch feminist residents. But after reading maansoor’s post, I think I’ll quit playing around and come out in support of all the bra burners in the house (my fire starting could be put into good use after all). Maansoor, I’m not sure how you could say that this collection of ideas, interpretations and assumptions that you just posted can not be classed as anything but utter sexist drivel, saaxib (no offence of course, but it is!). I’m calling it drivel because you’re implying that they’re all facts yet you’re not presenting us with any supporting evidence. :confused:
  18. Some people would argue that the world is run by the strong and powerful. They would argue that even if we reach that utopian stage of having equality between the sexes, there would still be a feeling of unease between men and women. They will argue that women will only be given total equality because the men deem it to be a pious act on their part. They will argue that because the men gave it, they could also wrestle it back whenever they feel like it. They would quote examples of places where some sort of equality between men and women existed but then a war, famine or political strife arose and the first victim of such disasters was women’s rights! They would use that example to illustrate the fickleness of the “Western” idea of equality. They would argue that in spite of all the extra tiers of morality, thought, kindness, love, consciousness, modesty and justice, the basic concept of the survival of the fittest would still rear it’s ugly head. They would argue that in order to have control over it, the aforementioned layers would have to be strengthened and enhanced. They would argue that a feminist movement, which aims to FIGHT for women’s rights, is a suicidal idea fighting a losing battle. I wonder what your replies will be! PS This thread was about male bashing (despite the artificial apologies at the start). I’m a firestarter, twisted firestarter......
  19. Heh. This site does not exist, brother. Officially, the site is moving to a new server (a ploy to limit the traffic). So until that little problem is solved, I doubt if those refugees will be welcomed with open arms. The doorman has locked up and gone on holiday. We all got in through the window.
  20. On another note, NG-darling! did you know that the 2nd wife is also expecting raula, I demand a paternity test. My second wife lives five thousand miles away and we have never met. That woman is up to no good (tell her I said that and if your hand can stretch far enough, slap her for me). Viking, thanks saaxib. Fortunately, she does not require me to go in with her. She says words of comfort are no good to her in that situation. She'll stick with her tried and tested method of asking my mother (who's a former nurse — midwife) to go in with her and walk her through it. I've been there before you see (twice). I know what your friend says about the placenta and all that other stuff. But, luckily, I didn't have to see any of it with my two girls (god! now all the potential second wives in here will think I'm an old fart). I was fortunate enough to walk in after the babies were washed and the Mrs had time to sort herself out and look all nice and pretty for me (too right I say). As for eating the placenta, it's very fashionable these days. A former colleague of mine, when she got pregnant, started hunting around for placenta cooking recipes. She planned to invite her parents and in-laws to a "dinner" party after she gave birth. She invited me but I politely declined the minute I understood what a placenta was! :eek:
  21. I really don’t think it matters if the president of the United States is a republican or a democrat. Their internal policy might be different but the foreign policy is the same. Kerry does not seem to have enough charm and charisma to win the election. People like to play it safe and they’ll vote for Bush again; in the same way that the Brits will vote for Tony Blair if there was an election tomorrow. What happens outside America does not matter to the voters, they need to see a real local scandal in order to get rid of Bush.
  22. This is the time when my predictions go all wobbly. But, I’m going to stick with Greece and Portugal. Portugal 2 - Holland 1 Greece 2 - Czech Rep 0 Final: Greece 2 Portugal 0 Viva Athena, Kalamata, Rhodes,etc..etc..
  23. ^^^ Delivery room? What do you think I am? A doctor? I will not be going into any delivery rooms, rather I’ll be pacing up and down the corridor worryingly and later, when the whole thing is over, I’ll be distributing cigars and a few Mejins of Jaat. Got to stay traditional, dear, got to stay traditional. No gaalo gaalo business of going into delivery rooms. Plus, I hate the feeling of helplessness a man gets when he enters one of these rooms. I’m the Lion of my pride. The Alpha male, the one who takes care of things and sorts out all big and small problems. I can’t have her seeing me all lost and useless when she needs me the most. Got to keep up the pretence, dear. Come to think of it, forget what I said in my earlier post, and pass me that invitation! :cool:
  24. No need to record anything, dear. I think you should be able to follow all the action here: They have a link to a live feed on this website! :cool:
  25. raula, sweetie, if that's what you regard as having muscles I would love to see what you consider slim! Feast your eyes on this, darling (Yes, I'm calling her darling - She's my Cyber fiancee). ^^^That guy is very skinny compared to the 12 pack stomach that I have. :cool: