looool mcc i am busted.

There are several men sitting around in the locker room of a golf club after a round, showering and getting ready for the 19th hole. Suddenly, a mobile phone on one of the benches rings. One of the men picks it up and the following conversation ensues: >(H-Husband, W-Wife) > >H: "Hello?" > >W: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?" > >H: "Yes." > >W: "Great! I am at the mall two blocks from where you are. I just saw a beautiful leather coat. It's absolutely gorgeous! Can I buy it?" > >H: "What's the price?" > >W: "Only $1,000." > >H: "Well, okay, go ahead and get it if you like it that much." > >W: "Ahh, and I also stopped by a Mercedes dealership and saw the 2002 models. I saw one I really liked. I spoke with the salesman and he gave me a really good price... and since we need to exchange the BMW that we bought last year..." > >H: "What price did he quote you?" > >W: "Only $60,000." > >H: "Okay, but for that price, I want it with all the options." > >W: "Great! But before we hang up, something else..." > >H: "What?" > >W: "It might look like a lot, but I was reconciling your bank account and I stopped by the real estate agent this morning and I saw the house we had looked at last year. It's for sale! Remember the one with a pool, English garden, acre of park area, and beachfront property?" > >H: "How much are they asking?" > >W: "Only $450,000, a magnificent price! and I see that we have that much in the bank to cover." > >H: "Well, then go ahead and buy it, just bid up to $450,000. Okay?" > >W: "Okay sweetie, thanks! I'll see you later! I love you." > >H: "Bye, I love you too." > The man hangs up and closes the phone's flap. The other men are looking at him in astonishment and derision. The husband raises his hand while holding the phone and asks, "Does anyone know who this phone belongs to?"

that's funny, i am going to try to do that. lol lol lol ha ha ha ha ha ha lol lol lol.

hey wiil waal this are some more blondes jokes that i gotten so hope u enjoy it: 1. What can Life Savers do that men cannot? Answer: Come in five flavors 2. What is the ultimate rejection? Answer: When your m*st*r*ating and your hand falls asleep 3. What did Bill Clinton say to Monica? Answer: I told you to li*k my erection, not wreck my election. 4.What does pizza delivery man and a gynecologist have in common? Answer: Both can smell it but can't eat it 5. What do you call a group of blondes on roller skates? Answer: A mobile sperm bank. 6. What do you call a blonde with a dollar bill over her head? Answer: All you can eat for under a buck. . 7. What do you do with 365 used rubbers? A. Melt them down, make a tire, and call it a Goodyear. Q. What's the difference between sin and shame? A. It is a sin to put it in, but it's a shame to pull it out. 8. What's the speed limit of sex? A. 68; at 69 you have to turn around. 9. Why is air a lot like sex? A. Because it's no big deal unless you're not getting any. 10: Why are Monica Lewinsky's cheeks so puffy? A: She's withholding evidence Q: What's the difference between light and hard? A. You can sleep with a light on. Q: Why do women rub their eyes when they get out of bed? A. Because they don't have balls to scratch. Q. Why is sex like a bridge game? A. You don't need a partner if you have a good hand. Q. What do a Christmas tree and a priest have in common? A. Their balls are just for decoration. this were some questions asked to a blonds.

abdinuur that was a wonderful and thanx a lot for posting it.

lol lol lol that's really funny. i don't know if u heard other blonde jokes but here are some i remember right now: 1.she thought that boyzIImen was a daycare center. 2.she missed bus 44 so she took bus 22 twice. 3.she got stabbed in a shootout. 4.she heard that most of the crimes are committed in homes so she moved out. 5.she told her boyfriend to meet her at the corner of "walk and don't walk" i think that's all i can remember for now, hope u like them. peace.

no i wouldn't date a guy that is shorter than me because if i marry him then we definitely have some midgets or real short ppl(politically correct) and i don't want that either. i don't also want a guy that's a foot or so longer than me, i just want maybe 6 inches taller than me. as to weight yes it is important to also. i am a big girl and i don't want to spend my wedding nite in jail for killing my skinny husband. about him i would like his body be toned built up a little the rest we can hit the gym together after the honeymoon. okay that's my 1 1/2 cents to say about this topic.

lol xafsa looks like today is ur day. if this question was asked to me when i was a teenager then i would have said virgin all the way. But as i grown up i would have to say it doesn't matter to me either way. If he is experienced then he would know what to do (not just what to put where) and he would be the teacher (where questions and demonstrating activity is greatly enjoyed and welcomed!!!) and if he turns out to be virgin then that would be sweet but then it is time to get out the kama sutra book, it would be little bit slow at first u know reading and trying to implement it at the same time. okay i am going to stop here before.........

good morning xafsa, i really don't know what u excately asking here, but i am going to give a response anyways lol lol. One thing my father told me not too long ago about somali ppl was that "rumors are facts" similar to saying "guilty untill proven innocent" i definitely can see it being applied to female reputation. if couple of ppl say something about any female then most likely the majority of ppl think it is the truth. To me i only care about the reputation that i have built for myself and not what others think or say about me because me and god know what the truth is and that's all that matters at the end. reputation is a double sword thing it is constraining yet at the same time it is what makes ppl dependable to us. i guess it would cut a person either way ha. i hope this makes sense and answered ur question is some way. peace

hey there ilhaam and no i am definetely not offened by what u said. The reason i said that story was because he was making a judgement on me and other girls that responded early based on our comments, which i try to assimilated it to ppl making a judgement about u based on what u wearing. I was trying to say to him that someone could make a comment here and not be living by it, simply as a woman wearing the islamic cover and not living up to those standards. u r right zina is harem to both men and women and god was further kind on men and allowed them to have 4 wives but women NO so i was just still asking why would they not marry women that they intended first to marry and no more because they slept with them that's all.

well i do love reading them romantic stories ah. my favorites are 1.nora roberts 2.sandra brown 3.judith mcnight 4.jane anne krantz 5.jude deveraux those are some that i could remember right now. see u later ppl.

well shocked bro first of all just because those ladies responded to my topic doesn't mean that they are loose women, and i don't need to find a reason to sleep around if i want to i will trust me. u shocked let me tell u one thing there was this lady that used to wear the islamic dress the whole nine yard thing, and u know every guy respected her because all they saw was just that appearance, but u know what she was sleeping with her brother in law and had a child from him. So bro don't judge a book by its cover those ladies didn't deserve that comment from u. p.s. best of luck with ur clean sista.

well thanx for commenting on this topic cruiser i agree with u completely u know what ppl say "what goes around comes around" lol that's funny kool cat, maybe u rite about the critisim part i don't really know, i hope some of the other fellas will let us know is that part of the reason??? raula let me ask u this do u think that guyz that sleep around disrespect themselves??? But u rite us as females have higher expectations and more to loss than men so ladies be smart about ur shit. take care and peace nomads.

alright nomads here is a question for somali fellas: "why do somali guyz don't want to marry somali women with sexual experiences or those that they were in love with and decided to get married to but as soon as they slept with them they changed their minds and somali guyz leave them?" is that something only somali fellas do or is it all guyz!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I found this interesting hopefully u guyz will like it too: There was a rich merchant who had 4 wives. He loved the 4th wife the most. & gave her nothing but the best. He also loved the 3rd wife very much. He's very proud of her and always wanted to show her off to his friends. However, the merchant is always in great fear that she might run away with some other men!! He too, loved his 2nd wife. She is a very considerate person, always patientand in fact is the merchant's confidante. Whenever the merchant faced some problems, he always turned to his 2nd wife and she would always help him out and tide him through difficult times. Now, the merchant's 1st wife is a very loyal partner and has made great contributions in maintaining his wealth and business as well as taking care of the household. However, the merchant did not love the first wife and although she loved him deeply, he hardly took notice of her. One day, the merchant fell ill. Before long, he knew that he was going to die soon. He thought of his luxurious life and told himself, "Now I have 4 wives with me. But when I die, I'll be alone. How lonely I'll be!" Thus, he asked the 4th wife, "I loved you most, endowed you with the finest clothing and showered great care over you. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep my company?" "No way!" replied the 4th wife and she walked away without another word. The answer cut like a sharp knife right into the merchant's heart. The sad merchant then asked the 3rd wife, "I have loved you so much for all my life. Now that I'm dying, will you follow me and keep me company?" "No!" replied the 3rd wife. "Life is so good over here! I'm going to remarry when you die!" The merchant's heart sank and turned cold. He then asked the 2nd wife, "I always turned to you for help and you've always helped me out. Now I need your help again. When I die, will you follow me and keep me company?" "I'm sorry, I can't help you out this time!" replied the 2nd wife. "At the very most, I can only send you to your grave." The answer came like a bolt of thunder and the merchant was devastated. Then a voice called out:"I'll leave with you. I'll follow you no matter where you go!!" The merchant looked up and there was his first wife. She was so skinny, almost like she suffered from malnutrition.Greatly grieved, the merchant said, "I should have taken much better care of you while I could have!" Actually, we all have 4 wives in our lives... The 4th wife is our body. No matter how much time and effort we lavish in making it look good, it'll leave us when we die. Our 3rd wife, is our possessions, status and wealth. When we die, they all go to others. The 2nd wife is our family and friends. No matter how close they had been there for us when we're alive, the furthest they can stay by us is up to the grave. The 1st wife is in fact our soul. Often neglected in our pursuit of material wealth and sensual pleasure. It is actually the only thing that follows us wherever we go. Perhaps it's a good idea to cultivate and strengthen it now rather than to wait until we're on our death-bed to lament. Think about it.................

hey there wiil waal it's an interesting topic there. I think that the problem exist when the partner that makes more money uses that excuse to get something or put down their partner then u got a big ohh. personally i don't care if my hubby makes more money than me as long as he spends it on me and his relatives and things like charity to the mosque or what not.now if i make more money than him, well there wouldn't me yours and mine there is only ours, and that money is only there to help us enjoy life comfortably. alrite that's it.

hi there indhadeeq hope u doing well? one thing that u can do is have the common friend that introduced u guys interfer see if they can find out for u how the water is and then let the mutual friend see if he would be inclined or interested in getting to know u, so then u should talk on the phone first for maybe about couple of weeks before actually going on a date so that u can see if u like his personality and not only his look. okay i hope this help in a way, good luck.

u absoultely rite nice guy, somali girls are taught not to talk about it and therefore it never improve it. But i think that a very healthy marriage has to have a good sexual intimacy relationship, because intimacy between hubby and wify is about 40% of a good or great marriage(totally my opinion)and it also strength one of the most important element of marriage "communication". I think female should ask their doctors questions in regards to sex and there are books that can help and the couples must be willing to try something different to see what works for them. okay that's enough for me now. peace.

yo abdinur that's really funny bro lol lol lol lies, secret, and sex always a good combination. lol lol.

hello there cartan how u doing? i definetely like and agree about what u posted about the difference between love and infatuation and it is something that i feel that the younger somali generation don't differniate between but i hope this would help them understand the difference a bit. keep up the good work. peace

hi there indhadeeq it is an interesting question. R u though talking about a guy that u have known maybe for awhile and talked to perviously and now wanted to ask him out? in that sitution he knows more about u and if u come straight out and say "would u like to go out with me" and see whatever he says from there. but if u talking about a guy that u never spoken to before but just seen him around, i think u need to find out first if he is in a relationship, and if not then introduce urself to him but don't ask rite away and if he doesn't ask for ur number then give maybe about 2 weeks and give him a call and say causually "that u were going to check this movie out and wondered if he wanted to join u or not..." wish u best of lucks, so go knock him off. hope that helps in a way

well well it is nice to see u nice-guy i see that u registered. as to ur comment about sexual performance, i think the reponsiblity lays on the couples involved in that sexual relationship. Someone not saying anything about their partners performance might mean that one of them has no way to compare their partner's performance to anything therefore thinking that this is how it is. i think one of the other thing i noticed about somali attitude toward sex is that is mainly if not only for recreational purposes not for enjoyment or fun, which leads females espically to not to participate in the act. As a man i think there is a responsiblity on him to ask his partner if there are things that need to be changed or inputs that they have on their sexual relationship. this is all my opinion ain't nothing that i am saying is fact, so plz don't be offended. peace

LOL LIBAAX TOOK THE WORDS RITE OUT OF MY MOUTH LOL LOL LOL LIBAAX SHE IS PROBABLY IN ANOTHER RELATIONSHIP IS RITE.

YO ABDINUR IF U KEEP MAKING ME LAUGH LIKE THIS ALL THE TIME I WILL SURELY BUST ALL MY RIBS AND WHERE WOULD THAT PUT ME. ANYWAYS BRO THOSE WERE SOME MAD JOKES U KEEP BRING. I WAS IN OHIO THIS PAST WEEKEND AND I WAS GOING TO GIVE U A BUZZ BUT U NEVER RESPONDED BACK TO MY MESSAGE, WANTED TO SEE THE GUY THAT'S MAKING ME LAUGH ALL THE TIME. LOL LOL PEACE

LOL LOL LOL LOL THAT WAS FUNNY.