Walnut Tree (the Passion) — unrelenting, strange and full of contrasts, often egotistic, aggressive, noble, broad horizon, unexpected reactions, spontaneous, unlimited ambition, no flexibility, difficult and uncommon partner, not always liked but often admired, ingenious strategist, very jealous and passionate, no compromise hmm interesting characters...I would say 99% is me...I don't know whether those who know me agree or not...bee bye

Somealien when was the last time a road to doing the right thing was easy...But imagine had anyone who gotten afraid of the obstacles and rejections didn't follow through, where we would be as human race?...Women being abused in west, be it muslims or non, have chance to change or do something even if their husbands will find them in shelters or not...Because they have do the right thing and the rest is depend on Allah...The risk outweighs anything else, in my personal opionion...One kid removed from an abusive home is one less obusive husband or an abused wife...Even those women who say "oh but he still love me and i love him and he asked me to forgive him" know it in their heart it isn't true and it's a sick love...But again maybe they staying because their own mothers stayed in abusive relationships...So we can't just stay in the cycle we have to break it and yes there is prize to it...Be it death, outcastism, fear...So we shouldn't discourge women by saying well it's easy said than done, but find ways we can help, small or large

Sundus r u asking me or someone else?

ijabo...You can add whatever bad to the list i mentioned and still they would be beautiful to me...Because if you look closely whatever i described is a women's nature, be it good or bad, they are still beautiful in their complexity and contradiction...That was the bottom line of my reply ...And I don't believe what i mentioned only describes a perfect woman, because if you look to the history or just around you, you would see women like those everday past or present doesn't matter...bee bye Welcome back Legend of Zu hope your visit is for long time and not returing to your cave right away!!!

hahahahahahahahahahahahahahahahaha I like it

Pearl you said, "since he is a muslim and i knew him for years that is what allowed me to let him enter my home..." You seem to imply that the whole actions which lead to the incident and it was all his faults...Therefore you absolved yourself if any behavior, beside letting him in your home without parents, to be cause of the sitution you found yourself in...I have few comments to make to that effect: 1. This sitution wasn't just like a man whom you have known and was known to your family just suddenly walk into your room "NO" 2. This guy expressed an interest in you and in developing a relationship with you, which you replied by merely laughing and ignoring it 3. From your first post, you said something about certain kinds of looks he was giving you, which indicated there was a sexual attraction from his side and he might have spoken sexually to you too 4. Again you made a choice to allow a man, who wanted to date you and even be sexually involved with you, to enter your house 5. Then you went to your room to change i don't know whether you stated that to him or not...This isn't probably true in your case, but there are women who use that as an invitation for guys to follow them to their rooms and whatever...There are guys who also believe that to be an invitation 6. This whole environment is like an alcholic having a drink put in front of him...What do you think he would do!!!!!!!!! 7. On top of that, you didn't even lock your bed room door which again can imply you were expected it and inviting it too Now looking at this sitution do you think your only problem or mistake was letting the guy in while home alone! Maybe that would been the case had he never stated any interest and was just a family friend who came to your bed-room while you were dressing...My point is not to only look at what actions he took causing the a mistake but your own actions allowing the mistake to happen...And sometimes it isn't just one thing but how much you opened yourself to sitution by ignoring signs and indications...bee bye

Personally I think this is a worthless topic and the only worthy response to it is this :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

hehehehe this is a good one...Two things though, i thought doctors were more skeptical than this doc...And his wife didn't notice anything wrong in her fridge till the doctor called :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek: :eek:

loooooooooool still makes me smile

In case of children existence in an abusive marriage, it is a woman's obligation to remove her children from such environment...Because children exposed to that home lifestyle will only perputate the abuse cycle and mostly likely male children would become abusive and female children would tolerate and actually seek abusive relationship...If we as women don't change, the world will only get worse and abuse cases would only continue to rise In case of no children, the women here have multiple options they can embarak on and don't have to allow themselves to be abused...I don't promot violence by either gender we must foucs on ending the violence cycle in any manner Although there was a headted argument in similar topic to this, unfortunatly it longer exist, it would have been interesting for you to have read it...bee bye

hmmm interesting concept...I don't agree with word "cann't" maintain standard morals...I don't think that is true to a great extent...Yeah sometimes, people who are poor, or below poverty levels do resort to theft or lying and what not...But also I noticed a large number of wealthy people commite more moral crimes than poorer people...Medical mal-practices, fraud, embazzelment, and list goes on...Bottom line for me comes to which one, heaven or earth, that is an individual more concerned with?...And depending on the answer to that I would say "yes standard of morals can be maintained with lower income"...bee bye

hmmm their complexities and contradictions make them beautiful in my opinion...Mentally they are strong, physically weak, emotionally vulnerable, virtous, yet tempterous, leaders as mothers, supporters as wives, most abused of both genders, heaven lies under their feet, families honor, outspoken, modest, humble, opinionated, passivits, activits, and list goes on...I don't know if anyone can boast of resume like women...and that's what make them beautiful

Classic faulty mentality "it couldn't happen to me" why what's so special about you? Allhamdullahi you were saved this time

"Why is that when a bother who cares about you; you in turn start using and abusing the bother? He is not worthy of kind treatment? Do you not think that what goes around comes around?" First of all I wouldn't say it was a general practice participated in by every woman...And second of all, it is people's nature unfortunately, that kindness is at times considered a sign of weakness or maybe a sign that says "RUN OVER ME"...Everyone one is worthy of kind treatment, espically if they treat others the same way, but not all of us get what we want or even what we deserve in life from others...So my suggestion to you is tell her how you feel in terms of how she treats you and if she doesn't believe or think she has done any wrong then you just have to let her go...Yeah you might say but I care about her and what not, but you know what "where there isn't respect there is nothing zip/nada" and by using you and abusing you as you said your girl doesn't R.E.S.P.E.C.T you...Since she began mistreating you, your only concern should beeen what you going to do about it? That is the question!!!!!!!!!!! As to your question "what comes around goes around?" well since you treat women nicely as you said maybe in your future there would be a woman who appriciates you just the way you are without taking advantage of you..... P.s. I don't agree with idea that men buying gifts for women (eg. girlfriends) without special occassion constitutes a "sinister motives" on men's part...Thank you would be sufficient

"would I marry a non-somali? yes. why? because I can. If I should find me a somali man that is worthy of being my husband, so be it. But if I find a non-somali that has all the qualities that I look for in a man, then he shall be my husband. Everything else is really secondary. Why limit yourself?" My sentiments excatly

Honestly does it never end the "WHY's!!!!!!!!!!"

i am glad to see my summer class wasn't a total waste...i scored 11 on the quiz...bee bye

looooooooool underdog...i now figured out why u seemed different...u were the king of comedy but showed a serious side...hmmm i guess i got to remove u from the small catogorized box

so that's the end ha...well i thought maybe she tied the knot or something and forgot our halwa...well i hope she enjoys europe...bee bye

gosh i forgot about this topic...It's weird reading something i had almost written a year ago...well hopefully my second made-up story was better than this..."shaking head"

hmmm now that i am eating and hopefully i am gaining my thinking faculties...i had the thought that the title of this topic "Sexual Deprivation" isn't really the same as "role of men and women" plus "love"...I mean the author starts it off with how wommen need love but then goes into love and family and role...Is he associating all those elements with sex...Cause to me, sex can exist without love or marriage or even clear definition of who is the boss...As to women needing men for sex come on that might be the case anywhere else than america.

hmmm reading this article there are things which were stated that made sense and i believed in...but at the same time, i couldn't get off the feeling that the conclusion built on couple of correct statement was wrong...I believe it's very hard to establish that "love" from a man is what every woman needs...I am not a feminist, not in some definitions, but there are ideals i do share with it...At the same time, i also know myself that i am a person who does need a partner in life, yet if another "feminist" woman had opposing feeling to that, it's her right...As to hunter vs. nurturer it's all conditioned responses or desires...Sometimes those elements depend on the one's own sitution or conditions and often have nothing to do with free choice...In the end, every view point is intresting and have always valid points but i don't personally agree with the conclusion of this article...bee bye

I agree with Kool-Kat on this...Every guy i had known (all as a friend) has taught me something about myself and the world...They are lessons that without being exposed to to them would change the person i am today...I don't look at my friends getting married or having babies and feel as if i missed out or regret my journey...i think it's working out in the right way i wanted it and Allah allowed me...When "the one" joins me in my saafar it would be the right time for me...And i am happy with that choice...bee bye BTW Kool_Kat come to think of it whatever happened to ur side kick "Rock's Chick"????? as last commment, i wanted to say something to someone talking about "how those kids could have been theirs" isn't that really going against what i always here about "what allah had written would happen" so if Allah hadn't meant it then why u regreting it since we advocate caalaaf...And second of all, it doesn't mean u married that person u would be happy with them or have children with them as they had with other people...

looooool shyhem i remember reading the exact american version of this but i enjoyed the somali twist you have created for it...For me i have always advocated the straight approach about "love" declaration matters...but that's just my style "no winkie hinty shit"...bee bye

looooooool darman are u worried cause u can picture urself in that sitution!!!!!! Whether the future wife will be like that i couldn't say, but i tell u one thing though...future husbands in apron plus a head band aren't pretty site...hopefully by then, we would be able to have a fashion just for u guys to look sexy as servents...cause as they say it in commercials "WE ARE WORTH IT"...ciao