I think the ability and the know how to drive gives a person an independence that is great...Now a days things are expensive to certain extend, but I can't think of not being able to drive anywhere whenever I want to...My sister on the other hand doesn't drive and I don't find anything wrong with it...It's just whatever a person feels is right for them...But a person should understand there is a great difference between not "wanting" to drive and not "able" to drive...bee bye

I voted for the first time and it was a great experience...I voted democrates and was still up till 3 am looking for final results...I was sad next day when Kerry conceeded of course but nontheless it didn't over shawdow going to vote...Insha allah can't wait for next time...I don't know how many people here followed up the news since then but it was interesting that the major cause for surge in voting and re-election of bush was due to americans' number one concern with moral values, followed by war on terrorism and economy...Largest turn out and vote numbers from latinos, evanglists, and etc...His campaign was running on anti-abortion, anti-same sex marriage, limited stem cells research...With the results it seems there is a major shift in American maybe toward conservatisim and what does it mean for us as somalis and as Americans! Got to keep our eyes open...Bee bye

To original poster, reading your topic quiet honestly leaves me with some questions...First of all, before marrying your husband had you not met your mother-in-law to be at all? Had you never attempted before moving in with her to interact or get to know her any better? Why didn't you just postpone your wedding until your husband and yourself were in better financial situtions?...Personally i feel that you posting such a topic about your own mother-in-law regardless of your feeling or her action shows bad taste and bad manner on your part...Keep your personal family business just that and Personal..if you felt you had to let some steam out there are multiple of ways to do so and would not be disrespectful to someone older than yourself regardless of their behavior....I think you owed it to your husband to not disrespect his mother publicly in a website...Bee bye

When i read the question nothing jumped to mind...Did i not lack anything!! Then it hit me, i didn't lack anything that mattered to me...Yeah i am short on money, patience, etc...But those things were of no importance to me in long run...I had what I wanted and was essential to me for example the love of family, friends, healthy mind and body, and desire for life and living...So to answer this question, i lack nothing...Or more accuratly nothing I need...bee bye

Layzie you can say that again...To the poster, no one other than your own friends responding should make you hear the resounding response to your forgive and forget...Goodbye

You know what you know the guy better than anyone here can know him...Just do what you think is right according to what you want to do and the guy you know...It's not right to allow our own attitudes or ideas of what most somali men would do to influence your choices...So do what's right for you and him and screw everyone else...Personally i don't think you should have brought this question to SOL because it's between you and your special friend and in that case no one knows you better or him than you yourself...bee bye

Somebody went to their bed without taking their medications beforehand...bee bye

loooooool people thought I made marriage sound bad...I don't know who old you are so i am not going to give up on ya..Your idea of marriage doesn't cause me to frown upon you but merely makes me pity you...Marriage is more than upgrade on your responsiblities list...Bee bye

Before I answer this question I wanted to say the eternal question of "womanhood" is relativism, meaning there would never be an absolute definition of what makes a female a woman or a girl but merely its meaning is relative to each individual...Having said that let me answer your questions relative to my own perceptions: 1. Do you consider yourself a fully grown woman, or do you still think of yourself as a little girl? Hmm this an interesting question and it's hard to answer briefly...A lot of times there isn't that much different of what grown woman wants/thinks and what young girl wants/thinks...As young girls most want to be successful, have fun, find prince charming, be good mothers but mostly importantly be loved for themselves...The only difference is how as girls we viewed that list and now how we view it as a woman with the distortions caused by living life...Defining myself as a grown woman I am accepting my development...And defining myself as a little girl I am embracing my faith in possibilities regardless of experiences and bitter realities. 2. Do you feel a great deal has changed from when you were 14/15? Or do you still feel as lost and confused as ever? If I said no I would shoot myself now...Honestly though I was one of those female who never experienced teenage years...I was intense as girl and stubborn...I never felt lost or confused in terms of who I am as a female because as my uncle loves to say "I followed my own drums"...Once I set up my standards I followed them regardless of what the trends were or who my friends were at the time...Being different or un-cool weren't labels I was afraid of...My change from young girl to grown up woman is viewing life in different shades than black and white. 3. When does a girl actually become a woman? All those mentioned by you are part of it...As girl hits puberty she realizes she isn't like one of the guys, first step...At 18 yrs she understands her responsibilities in determining the woman she will be from then on, second step...Recognizing her own sensuality, have nothing to do being sexually active or not, is her third step...Compromises and tolerance skills learned from marriage is her fourth step...And the final one being truly a mother, not meaning only to take up responsibilities, she transcends everything else I got to run right now so can't double check hope i made sense though...Bee bye

Maybe those laws were written but I would assume they are quiet pre-dated to possibly thousands of years...So I wouldn't put my hopes on them still being applicable particularly after the age of enlightenment…And probably countries don’t dust their laws because they assume people have common sense although that is a big question…bee bye Ps. this a side notice, I found it interesting that this topic was first posted almost excatly a year ago this month

Hmmm because he can...And yes that is my final answer

I am going to let the other guys probably running in here right now to roll the red carpet...In my personal opinion i find it extremely annoying and waste of space for people to announce their "newbie" status in SOL everyday because truthfully it doesn't matter in long run...I thought it was a phase forgotten but rearing it's ugly head again :rolleyes: :rolleyes:

N.M.

When i read this post something at the back of my mind tickled me about the origianl poster, and it wasn't till tonight i finally remembered what it was...looool I must say Modesty you surely came a long way from psycho somali man stalking you worrisome days to being pissed off about your height nowdays ...Oh yeah i am 5'3" and intimadating as hell

looooooooooooooooool people surely do strangest things...He was arrested for pimping and then stuck himself on her and she allowed it, definitely the icing on the cake

Che now that is the "watch and see" part of the whole deal, would you say!

Rudy ever anyone tell ya you certainly write like a confused fella or is it just your broken english :confused: :confused:

I didn't read the poem but saw your last line, is there a woman's day???

looool DA been making them cry for so long you prepared with the tissue now eh Pass it on sista

First of all, it's great to see you again Che-guevara, i missed you a lot in sol...hope things are going well for ya...As to your comment it's similar to what i mentioned in first page...The inactment of the cheating inclination is a testement to each man's will and control... I remember watching something about that story of Bobitt if i am not mistaken after it was reattached the man went on to make porn films...I guess he really wanted to prove his manhood NGONGE whatever you think dude

Viking i would agree hormones play a major role and i would metion why and which ones later...I am also glad you know man's sexual organs are outside but not all woman's are inside...For exmaple, breast are outside...So your conclusion it had to do with location of those organs is bullshit...Now let's look at few scientific points...First of all in sexual arousal there are two important factors 1) Neurotransmitter, those which sends a signal to brain to cause an effect...Some of those are Nitric Oxide, dopamine, epinephrne, and norepinephrine... and 2) Hormones like testostrone and estrogen...Now let me remember some of my lessons from sexual development course...Did you know that testosterone levels in most men are generally above the required threshold for sexual interest or activity...So what does that tell ya!...You mentioned estrogen, actually it turns out estrong has little impact on sexual desire in female...It is more important in menustration, menapause, and female genital lubrication...But estrogen released from ovaries does play a minor role...You see in woman, dopamine produces a hormone called "oxytocin" which is the major H in female sexual interest...Both estrogen and oxytocin must co-couple to produce female arousal...While men only require estrogen...I remember my professor mention how there is a correlation between testostrone and why men are slower to form emotional ties and more likely to think initial contacts as sex interest...I remember reading last year or something a research conducted showing that male were more sensitive to the smell of estrogen...Not to prolong this cause i got a class to run to, but hopefully it clearifies things... Ladies, why such violence now, all men are born cheaters, just enjoy the one you like till he's expiration date of fidelity

Without Question definitely big YES...Not because i don't trust them but there can always be the sitution where they contracted something and didn't know themselves...But more in my case is i wanted not only test for Aids i want to do a completely genetic history, since as somali individuals there are no records of our medical history, there are a lot of things to consider such as birth defect or anything else...Blood test is a must in your days and times now...Without taking it seriously one is a setting duck for anything...bee bye

First of all i think your actions made whatever was happening a big deal...Honestly if you didn't like her attitude when it started your first action should been by going to her and saying calmly and no attitude from your side "listen i have noticed you giving me the cold shoulder or these strange looks...We family and i don't understand the reason...Had i done something wrong or is there something bothering you?...Just tell me and we can handle it" if she doesn't tell you or continues with her bizzare attitude then you should have stayed in your room and ignored the looks and what not...But since it's tough for ya, then moving out to another room would be good...And then only speak to your cousin when it was necessary and always treat her respectfully regarldess of what she does...Your attitude should reflect who you are not who you dealing with...Although i know there are those that push us and if it comes to that just go outside and take some fresh air...Best of wishes with your issue...bee bye

loool Baashi duh cause women learned it from the men...Come on now, you always knew women were smart and wouldn't waste such lesson now Oh yeah Jumatatu the one snake eye comment dude that reminded of this old woman in "runaway bride" movie explaining why julia roberts ran away at her wedding day...Now forever i will have an image of you as an old lady

Goodbye and best of lucks