I like poo jokes as much as the other person, but.....I'll let the banner do the talking

^Stand up comedians are rarely funny. This guy is no exception. Narniah if you find yourself seriously irritated, perhaps it's time to quit SOL.

Guessing the honeymoon was a tad bit disappointing then?

Apophis;872979 wrote: ^^ Because its it's unusual for women to get jobs, especially Somali women so it must be discussed as a huge step forward. I think unemployment tends to be a lot higher when it comes to Somali males than females. And unless you're job is to get paid for posting in SOL I would argue you're the most unemployed system Lord ever

I think you should delve deeper into why cleaning ladies cannot help but declare love to you. Therein lies the path to the truth and possibly bread.

Honestly thought this was going somewhere else. Why is this in the women's section?

I dedicate this song to you Alpha. dammit I don't know how to upload videos

I can't stand it even when I'm off my head. There's no escaping bad music, it's as if it's an entity of its own, always lingering simply waiting for the opportunity to ask me to wave my hands about.

I've never understood the appeal of rap music, you've heard one ego centric mule yap about daddy issues, designer hats and all night fecking (it's always got to be all night), over soulless background music accompanied by an annoying female voice singing lines not remotely related to the rest of the song, you've heard them all. Rubbish.

Suldan, was Luqman taller than Muhammed or would you say they were about the same height? Always wondered...

Alpha Blondy;871268 wrote: that kate has no shame ma iistiir? how dare she wear something resembling the hijab? she's was caught in the nude. i've actually seen and inspected those top-less pictures of her, to which, i've reached the firm conclusion that white women have no virtue left or for that matter shame. And I've reached the firm conclusion, no pun intended, that you've also inspected non-white titties, runta iska sheeg. Nipples and shame have nothing to do with each other by the way. It's not like she was caught giving a rim job for fecks sake

I know a family with a 15 year old son, he gets up at 5.45 am, 7 days a week to do a paper round before school. He's projected to get all A's in his up coming GCSE's next year, he's polite, friendly and uber confident. You don't need to be a prophet to know he's not headed down the road of other Somali kids in his class. He was lucky to have been born to sensible, hardworking parents. I don't know much about those dead young men but I'm guessing a lot of them didn't have solid background support from mommy and daddy.

Garnaqsi;870910 wrote: guerilla, I like you. We should meet up. And I so like to be liked. Where do you want this meeting done?

A bunch of hairy bulky men fisting, feeding on each others feaces whilst frog dancing?

If you're really worried then hightail it to the docs ina adeer

Less dyslexic and more 'I can't write for shite so I'll go around using medical terms incorrectly to excuse myself'

Wadani;870813 wrote: Narniah, That was a wonderful read. There's just something about the bond we Somalis have; something deep and visceral about it. You Sir just made my day! I remember dishing out Somali on the tube to some old busy bodies once, they were nattering about whether I was Somali or Jamaican very audibly right in front of me. 'naa wa Somaali' loudly whispered about 5 times with a few interjections of 'maya eegaa gacanteed', 'eeg timaheed' 'eeg sankeed' The differing one looked shocked when I said 'shaqo baad ubaantiheen' (oh snap!) The other simply looked smug. I can vouch for my arms, I've some pretty impressive tattoos (how's that for shameless plugging Alpha Blondy?) as for sankeyga iyo timaheyga it's anyone's guess really. Back to the topic, something iffy about this story Narniah, how did he get a card and pin without knowing how to use an ATM machine? Was he simply waiting around for a Somali person to walk by that fateful night or did he have other plans for cash withdrawal? If so, what were they? Why was he so trusting of a Stranger? Was he mad? How much did he have available? The mind boggles. Did you not ask him any questions?

Naxar Nugaaleed;868780 wrote: I should start a protest about Muslims protesting every ***** in every corner of the world Sign me up.

Sign me up.

Everyone seems to have gone off on a folly of their own. Ending conflict, educating the masses, development are no brainers when it comes to ending poverty, but this thread is called 'family planning' for a bloody reason. This is it. And this. Feel free to google more, or just watch some telly. These kids don't stand a chance, by the time anything remotely resembling development comes their way, several generations of babies would've suffered immeasurable agony through no fault of their own...and died. Surely the most humane thing here is to stop people who are unable to feed their children from having anymore? And yes that includes benefit hoarders. And why is it every time someone mentions contraceptives there's an ijit who throws the word eugenics around? There is no automatic right to life and women don't have intelligently designed vaginas ergo contraceptives = good.

aero;864139 wrote: It seems like with our culture, the more you produce, the better off you are. Perhaps that works in a nomadic society but in the concrete jungle here? I'm not so sure. I've noticed families where the mothers are pregnant practically every year and I come across needy children who only seek their parents attention but lose it after a year because another one is on the way or is born. So they go on destroying and creating havoc. The mother or hell even the father doesn't have the time to teach them a thing or two about edeb, akhlaq and ixtiraam for the most basic things in life. In result, you have a troubled child with no foundation. I am a firm believer of upholding quality over quantity and ask our fellow brethren to produce children of substance instead of a massive number . I read this article today on the under achievement of Somali children in the UK, http://www.guardian.co.uk/education/2012/sep/03/somali-pupils-farah-role-model

Guzel;864051 wrote: Why not tackle poverty first instead of questioning one's right to reproduction. How do you propose we tackle poverty when every hour hundreds are being born into poverty? Che, I reread your post several times, beats me what you're trying to say.

Couldn't quite bring myself to watch more than 20 minutes of Idiocracy. I'm not sure about educating women, it's not that quick a solution. Besides all efforts will be thwarted by the cyborgs that run Churches, with their infinite amount of money they'll continue to run amok proselytizing with every breath on the evils of birth control. It will take too damn long to make them see reason. If I won the lotto, I'd go around offering women in Africa sterilization in exchange for £1000, bet they'll go for it. It's just disconcerting that for all the yapping about human rights, having children one cannot feed, only for them to die in their infancy a painful, agonizingly slow death is not considered a human rights violation, it should trump anyone's so called 'right' to reproduce. What kind of person would put their child through that for a session of hanky panky anyway? Che, atheists tend to have lessor children anyway. We also tend to be pro-choice so if you ever knock up someone it's us you'll be thanking.

Seems every time I turn on the telly there's a bulletin asking me to donate £2 a month to feed starving children. We've all seen the heart wrenching, two-minute display of crying babies who look within an inch of death while the parents look on forlorn (and occasionally surprisingly well-fed) as if never in a million years could they have prevented such a horrible outcome. Having 32 children (see the Abdi Jama post) is greedy and also very weird, what's wrong with 2? We need to learn that when it comes to children, less is more. In fact less is not only more, it's less. And that's good. We can collectively put an end to starvation, give the environment some much needed respite and make using public transport a joy within two or three generations if we just block the pipes. What say ye?

One of 32 children Who the heck has 32 bloody children? Why? *Off to start a thread on family planning*