LOL@the videos see? Such filthy minded sods, I for once shall take the moral high ground. (Waves like the Queen mother and skips of innocently)

^-I kind of get the impression that your not fond of old Marx here. Am I missing a vital piece of SOL history? Ps Adam- LOL Your trust in me warms me deeply my friend but how can you be sure that I'm not a man? This is after all the internet- I could be a balding four bellyed 56 year old toothless vagabond name Coco Chanel.

LOL- Holy sh*t...is that a real quote? I didn't even notice it so, er...What is it I'm supposed to do? Deny such scandalous claims?

^-LOOOOOOOL! I couldn't agree more with you Zulfa- It was excellent! I loved the eloquence in which English and Somali was perfectly interwoven. Somalish- of the highiest calibre LOL and the story? Aww a very entertaining read indeed, so cute, so sweet and so very real. A properly cute Somali read. Thank you for sharing it with us

I vote for MARX to stay for no reason other then Diireye also asked me to. LOL -Chocolate-honey your not alone sweetie. Still, I had no idea this thread existed? In which case from what I have seen of MARX (Fleeting glances not much) I like. So I vote for him to stay. If he wishes to that is...

Oh yes and Paragon- *Turns back winks and starts singing again* Anigu waan uu heesayaa, hawada cishqi bay hayoo! hawadaydii noqotayee hadmaad ii -(okay okay I'll stop I can see that your much affected with embarassment and thus my work here is done) *Laughs with evil delight* Still this is for you preachs iyo cream LOL-I know I know I love rubbing it in, tis a folly of mine. Ps 2-Apologies for the late reply.

^-LOL, No, No, No! No cheap Shukansii here mate I’m merely successfully wooing the pants off your friend paragon and without much effort it would seem. Just a few flutters of my lashes and cleverly timed accidental “brushes” against his chest and he’s mine. Now paragon dearest- I honestly had no idea it was one of your favourite tunes I merely picked a song I liked and without (initially) the intention of seducing you with it, but I mean just look at the result it has got me any way? Your fairly gushing with giddy masculine joy. Art thou cheek inflamed my love? How sweet. LOL In anycase what can I say? except that my taste in Somali music is exceptional. Thank you for the song by the way it was very warming. Much obliged. Now I have gotten all of that out of the way you must allow me to get this out of my-system. Your story? Holy-moly with cookies, crisps and crack on toast...I Just cannot believe it! Where have you been hiding your romantic stories? Please you must think up some more and post them! LOOOOL I had a devil of a time laughing my entire guts out reading them. I was in utter shock! A romantically inclined Somali man? How sweet. But and there is a but, your characters? LOL What utter imbeciles, seriously I’m offended for woman kind when it comes to Nimco is that your dream of the ideal heroine? LOL God you couldn’t be more typical to create such a spineless woman. Why was she weeping when singing to him? Kudos for her having the guts to sing her little butt off but weeping? Jeezlousie now that’s just sad and stealing her friends poems? Lord how her self-esteem must been suffering. Now don’t get me wrong, we can all appreciate the arts but there are more sophiscated and honest ways of doing so. Oh and Diiriye crying all over the bus? LOOOOOOOOL- Waale that made my day! However I shall give you one benefit of the doubt, you did make both characters so pathetic and useless that you were fair in your distribution of the “hapless and st*pid” factor. But if I like nothing? Its fairness, so thank you for making diiriye howl with grief-for no particular reason it would seem other than to exhibit emotion. Theres a time and place for tears dear friend but that wasn't it. Having said all of that, I liked your story it was very entertaining (to say the least) and you write wonderfully. Thank you for the laugh and please do write some more and direct me to anything pieces of SOL work-so very entertaining indeed, welldone! Ps The story about the rowdy-politically horny -just shag me "I hate you" students? Was also quite amusing.

Cara and Malika theres nothing in the least bit-steamy or sexual going on here and obviously its all in your heads. Paragon- So you want us to get to work eh? Well I thought you'd never ask Mr D.I.Y Jim’ll fix it. So where shall we start first? Fixing the pipes in your neck of the woods or unclogging the drains at my place? Perhaps you’d like to (in the words of Mr Miyagi-god rest his soul) wax on and wax off your golden trophies or polish my delicately refined silverware? If not we could both set about tightly twisting the shower head on your bathroom to ensure no untimely leakages incur. I hear those unexpected freezing cold bursts of water can’t be a nightmare-and especially during winter when one is dazed and often half-asleep while it’s happening. And if none of that tickles your fancy I could set you to work with unblocking the kitchen sink at my place, I can just imagine you sweating and puffing with the effort of releasing all that pent-up waste and debris with your very efficient and manly sized plunger. With your toolmanship and self-confessed hands of wonder I have no doubt you’ll succeed in relieving my kitchen sink of all its treasures. If only you were ambidextrous and then we'd both be in for a treat-you could unclog the sink with one hand and polish the Tupperware with the other. Oh but to dream... Ps Ladies, See? I told you nothing in the least bit sexual is mentioned at all. (swaggers off nonchantely only to trip midway-giggle guilty and then run off before the giggles turn into full on cackles of evil delight)

Today I'm feeling rather exhausted. (Yawns and strolls off to bed)

^- You want both of us to tackle the "thing" that's the real issue together? Don't you think thats a little riske? What if the real reason for your angst (aka the "thing") overwhelms you during our mutual-co-operative team effort to understand? Wouldn't you prefer to deal with the "thing" alone and in private. If not? Then you need only ask and you shall have my assistance. (wink, wink- insert innuendo) See your mind is plagued with filth? (For shame)

Paragon, Subtitles eh? Why how considerate of you! -*whispers under her breath* b@staar! LOL-Thinly veild insults indeed Anyway the first song I didn't much care for but I liked the second better and just to reciprocate your obvious attraction towards me I dedicate this song entirely to you, sweetest paragon. (Flutters her lashes) Notice the hindi in the bright orange jacket dancing in the wind and driving with his arms comically and foolishly in the air? Thats how you make me feel........( ) dhabta an kugu haye soco siradey! Er..I mean soco inaadeer? (Opens her arms wide and winks) http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=H-75mi7u6 pE&feature=related Embarassed yet? LOL-Good and theres more to come if you keep pushing your luck. Chocolate-honey- Not to leave you out on this love fest- I dedicate this one to you.

So you broke up with a Yemeni? I fail to the issue here. I say rejoice! There are plenty more hot Somali fellers in the sea Whether or not they're useful is another discussion altogether.

Rather sad...and profound.

Paragon, deviod of all morals eh? Where matter is matter and mind is mind. Quite a philosopher aren’t we? But aren’t you just skating around the fact that you’ve produced a very perverse piece of erotic literature and are now embarrassingly back peddling with all this talk of metaphors which are in essence no more a useful cover than a 3cm wide hand towel for your clearly outlined sexual frustrations? For once in your life, call a spade a spade and come out of the pervert’s closet. You’ll find that the grass is much greener on this side. Muhahaha Ps I’m very sorry for the late reply I must have missed this thread like others and forgot that I replied once. So excuse me for any inconvenience I may have caused.

Bonjour everyone I just wanted to share a very catchy and favourite song of mine with any who is bored or is just looking for a song to giddly dance around to. As usual the dishes were my inspiration and after searching for this song on youtube for like a millennia I finally found it and it goes something like this... *Starts singing and clapping her hands waiting for the cue to sing* “ililaha wadnaha iyo bogaad igaga taalaaye” *Continues swaying from side to side and jiggling her shoulders* Heres the link, do enjoy. http://www.youtube.c om/watch?v=wIzGBX25n Sk (Oh and please do ignore the weird strings at the begining and wait for the proper song)

Please don't behave on my account if its your desire to curse, scream, weep and cry all over the place then you have my leave to do so. Far be it from me to stifle such a "volatile?" man as yourself (Tries to hide a chuckle)..in anycase I'm not the sensitive teary-eyed-sort so I'd really not care or be bother in the slightest by anything you or anyone else has to say. But please allow me to excuse myself and leave you to picket at your "respect" campaigne. Its the least I could do (Idly Strolls off) I'm hardly going ever going to affected by anything you

Whats with all the sly snicking going on then? I happen to think the kid is cute. A nice-bountiful figure- and I only wishe I had a portion of her calfs. Mine are like two shriveled and dried up flower stems-narrow-straigh t and pathetically weak. Her koob looks like it could kick a man between the balls and not collaspe into itself afterwards. My kinda lady Ps Didn't know Somalis ran "beauty pagents" a little g@y aint it? Still cute looking kid.

Sounds like you've covered them all LOL Ps the Blue Ocean has nice fish-the salmon is well cooked but they scrimp on the rice-which if I'm honest? If cooked kinda craply. The meat is adequate- not my favourite and the salad is your standard Somali fair-only jazzed up a bit with fete cheese. Still, I'd rather eat Somali food then any thing else.Though I must admit-turkish food is also very delicious- sometimes lebonese food is aight. Depends on where you go I suppose like with most restaurants.

This obviously isn't the work of those loveable sea-protecting pirate rogue we've all come to love. (Waves her Pirates rock flag) Ps On a serious note, this issue of stealing aid meant for the truly poor and hungry is begining to make me truly sick. Its bad enough that Somali's have begun to steal from the pockets of their own sick and dying, but now it seems that they must venture forth to dip their fingers into the life bread of other desperate folk. Trully stomach wrenching indeed.

*quirks a brow, smiles Lazily, yawns and then lightly puts her feet up after a long hard day* Now, Mr Stioc- We both know that I was toying with you- and my initial tongue in cheek reference to you being a gay-rights activist was by no means an indication as to the state of your personal beliefs. (Good lord need I have to say such things aloud? LOL)..No.. But what I did find amusing however and still do in all honesty is how a poof being hounded by bunch of silly teens would truly warrant this much passion from anyone. Especially one of the Somali persuasions given our natural dislike of such folks. Respect or nay-gays are gays and silly kids will be silly kids. Besides it is us who teach them this disdain for all things homosexual whilst they dwell within our homes so I can hardly clip one around the ear for detesting one as much red blooded Somali would. They are simply young, niave and stup*d in that they are yet to learn the art of haughty sophisticated disdain veiled in a feigned tolerance which is truly a mask of contempt. *Rubs her tired eyes* Oh and please do disabuse yourself of the notion that I would ever wish or care to "get away" with saying anything remotely rude to anyone. How utterly boring would it be if sensitive souls such as yourself didn't make fools of themselves once in a while? *Winks and strolls of chuckling* Centurion- What can I say? I enjoy a good ramble now and again. In my case its always now and again....LOL

^I couldn't agree more. STOIC- (Chuckles darkly) Oh my, it seems that I have touched a raw nerve as it were, you do realize that I was only tweaking your nose and there really was no real reason to spontaneously combust. Still, it was amusing to read what you deem an appropriate and impassioned comeback. Had you and a couple of others been a little more astute however, you would have realized that almost at the very beginning it was all tongue in cheek with a dash of unassuming irony. But alas you missed the subtle cues that I was only joking with you and have shamed yourself by deigning to tread lower than what I can only assume your usual lofty heights of the deepest morality and of course maturity. (Tries to keep a solemn face without bursting into a fit of cackles) But I will however, address one thing in your reply- as touched as I am for your help in finding my sexual che or “sync” (as you delicately put it) I’m afraid that I must decline the offer, masturbation doesn't really do it for me. Oh and just to leave you with something on a thread I personally am indifferent to- (for several reasons) if you were in Somalia and a couple of homo’s were living in your neighbour kissing and holding hands in front of your children (Poofs do that now a days) and a bunch of over zealous hormonally charged delinquents were throwing stones at their door or at them. Would you be this much up in arms as to a lack of respect for the gaylords way of life? or would you be egging those teens on? (Lifts an amused brow) Oh how sophicated we have become in embedding ourselves within the wests ideas of the expression of personal freedom that we have begun to lie even to our very selves.I personally wont bother with airing any hypocritical illusions as to giving homo's any more respect than I would given them then if they were right on my door step in my very own country. So you can keep any false sense of moral piety to yourself. Adieu

^LOOOL Dhimo! And why am I not surprised that it was you who replied? I wasn't even dicussing sex but merely the equipment one uses. There is a very clear distinction between the two. (tries not to laugh) Ps Is that so? Banana flavour is popular eh? More than likely in the south region of somalia though judging by how popular eating a banana with every meal is over there. LMFAO- *runs the heck out of there before she's battered to death* Wallahi I'm kidding! Wallahi! *rofl*

^- Indeed? Well then allow me to raise your rainbow coloured pashmina in the air as a sign of my respecting your gaylord activism, thus giving you leave to shimmy down the lane wearing nothing but a bumperstick on your naked bottom reading "Can't touch this". Nothing says gay and pride like having random men sticking their fingers up ones bottom. Truly quite empowering...

I don't mean to be fastidious but what precisely is the point of this thread and its exposé on horny hypocritical sheiks and their banana flavoured condoms? Plus is it me or does this tale of immorality cast a cynical light on the not so popular god fearing kind the reer magaal types dislike so much? Not there’s anything wrong with reer magaals or the G.u.s-weyne sorry *clears her head* ..I mean "gadweyne" crew but me thinks there is a bit of unsportsmanlike knife stabbing at the expense of the real god fearing kind. Or maybe I'm being a tad too sensitive, I mean look at me..taking the side of holy molys? Who'd have ever thought it. Still it would have been more amusing with details. Did you hear me? DETAILS. For example why did the Sheik choose banana flavour out of all the prospective flavours there are. I presume paya, passion fruit and mango flavour to be within the exotic range of Durex and being Somali I would have thought those particular flavours would have been more to his liking. Why not even watermelon? I often hear that its a black mans delicacy to indulge in such a fruit so why has this particular black man not? Boogles the mind I tell you.

Whats all this talk about respecting g@ys? Seriously what is the true point of this thread? It is supposed to be some kind of FIB monitored undercover Homo-rights activism going on and right under our very noses? Oh the shame...