Short answer is nope, I got a family to feed people so I can't afford to do anything for free.

Malika-"The obsession of discussing,acting,se eking sexual gratification is rather jahiliyaa." As apposed to discussing and making muslim men horny over religion lectures which describe in detail the prospect of rewarding them with unearthy sex with 70-pure bred huralceynes? LOL- I'm teasing you and if you hadn't noticed the whole thread is just for a laugh. Still this notion that Islam protects the dignity of ones spouse..do you mean covering up their idiosyncrasies *Ducks for cover*-Ignore me woman I am bored and thus need a laugh. Chocolate honey- But what is normal my dear? Isn't normalacy relative and rather subjective? *Starts massaging her foot* LOL Fu-fu- Well....I er...I'm speechless, for once. I'd never quite thought of you as a panty sniffer.

I liked it a lot, very interesting indeed and that smart mouthed little b@stard should have recieved a few more slaps where I'm concerned. I look forward to reading more-you've learnt the art of crafty dialogue. Wonderful- I would have loved it more had it been the Somali police who were interrogating him-now that would have been even more entertaining. Ps I do apologise but I must agree with Ibti- Abdi's are often trouble-making hot blooded fools with hedious tempers. My grandfather for example was a hell raiser.

Welcome back into the bosom of SOL *Lifts her cup of sweet tea to GG and gives three drunken cheers of welcome*

Below me are five types of fetishes which exist along with a few questions I'd like to pose to the ladies of SOL in effort to understand the limits to our own sexuality. I must stress this to be a mature adult discussion so let us begin in earnest sincerity. Formicophilia- Is deriving sexual pleasure from having a host load of insects crawling all over your body and most especially your genital regions. A fact you’ll also find quite interesting is that this love of all creatures great and small (in this case Small)- almost exclusively affects African men. Most presumably because “the black man” is so well endowed that even the very insects have difficulty keeping away. *Quirks a brow* Wickepedia- sure has some interesting information. Plushophilia- Is the unholy love one has for stuffed and cute-cuddly little animals- you know that little teddy bear, rag doll or toy animal you used to drag across your mothers fadi sacuudi? The one where you lovingly used to force feed tea? Well some adults (men-to be more accurate) like to force feed those cute emblems of childish innocence with objects of an entirely less welcoming nature. Because when the teddy bears comes to picnic with these fellers they never quite come back the same again. In truth the thought of stacking my husband’s shelves with teddies to satisfy his urges for cuddly toys is something I find quite amusing. Imagine having to put lingerie on Winnie the pooh and dressing him up for your husband’s night of cuddly toy adulterated pleasure. I can see me provocatively walking my skimpy clothed teddy bear up to husband (Ventriloquism at its best) complete with role-playing –“come and get me ‘post-man pat’ you can post a letter through my box any day” material. If I am nothing I can be accommodating at times. Erotic Asphyxia- This, as the name suggests is the sexual pleasure one gets from either bestowing or being the recipient of proper good strangle- during the act of sexual coitus. Now some ladies (Usually of the holy persuasion-you know the obedient sex your husband good and proper (lest he marry another) kind- might be open to this (Ibti that means you I kid, I kid LMAO) But me personally? I draw the line at being strangled during sex. I mean good lord what if my husband accidentally stimulates my gag reflex and I end up vomiting all over my self or worse? On my expensive Egyptian cotton bed sheets? It’s bad enough being choked and to have undigested food thrown into the process but ruining ones bed spread is just bad manners. Thus it’s a no-no to erotica-asphyxiation but I would however, having said all of that be willing to sympathetically strangle my own husband during sex, if he so wishes. Marriage is about compromise is it not? Plus it would in truth be a good form of stress relief after a long-stressful day at work. Who needs a therapist when a lady need only climb atop her husband and choke him now and again? One only need learn when to stop strangling for this to work out but I’m sure with great practice comes great patience. Burusera- Panty fetish- It’s basically involves grown men giggling-gushing and fawning over ladies panties. I could understand its somewhat arousing logic if there were a beautiful half naked woman wearing them at the time but one must draw the line at men who steal ladies dirty knickers only to lock themselves in closets, smell and do unquestionable things with the frilly (in my case hideously Asexual granny) typed things. It just cannot be hygienic. Imagine catching your husband locked in the broom cupboard lying in a bed of your dirty panties naked and rubbing himself with them? It’s just-rather disgusting. This I shall not indulge- Not unless he signs some sort of contract where he becomes a sort of live-in cleaning service-whereby he washes my knickers after every-nicker appreciation session he holds in the closet. Then only would I be willing to turn a blind eye- you know what they say? When life gives you lemons? Make lemon cheesecake, or in his case edible strawberry flavored panties. Erotic lactation- You know that whole Freudian fixation with breasts thing? Turns out that some men have taken his most basic metaphorical ideas quite literally… to bosom. If you haven’t already worked It our for yourself it’s the process where by some men get erotic excitement from being breast fed like infants. Even US advertising giants have utilized the exhibition of this sexual taboo with those long ago “got milk” adverts. I personally find it rather peculiar and perverse indeed especially when you consider all the psychological issues involved. So ladies, I propose this question to you, if your husband was into any one of these peculiar rituals would you indulge his sexually atypical proclivities there by pouring creepy crawlies all over his body while he writhes in ecstasy or would run off with arms flying in the air with fright? To conclude- I think that if my husband wishes for me to play ants in his pants I think that I would be forward thinking enough to accept his terms. I’d be perfectly fine with standing over my husband pouring maggots and larve on him- so long as we did so in the garden- There is no way I’m soiling my bed with insects-lord knows what places they may sneak into. Strangulation I’d be open to so long as he were the one receiving the strangles, knickers he can amuse himself with so long as he washes, irons and returns them to their proper place, as for allowing him to drink milk from my bosom? That’s one thing cannot and will not accept-in fact he’ll receive a passionate smack over the face with my dacas if he even think of such a thing. What about you ladies? And why do you think it’s always men who are fixated with such strange sexual practices? Because statistically speaking men are more likely to have fetishes compared to women. Are they born depraved creatures? And would you indulge them discuss.. *Pushes her tongue into her cheek and tries not to laugh*

^- Mr Dabshid- I must say I'm in awe with the mans musical talents- those fingers and the controlling of the strings? Quite extraordinary. Okay people I have a couple to share- But this time I was listening to some while making a late night meal-makes a change from the usual saturday cleaning routine. This is a very old-perhaps over used song but I still like it when I hear it now and again. "Bada cas baan ku geynaya boogay waan ku saaraya" This is a classic song Hees taan waa mid qiiro badan, lakiinsa waad mid dadka kacinaysa.

Adam-LOL As delicous I'm sure our darling Chocolate Honey is the truth is I don't particularly care for Chocolate or honey. Now had she been a saxnii full of baris and wonderfully cooked Helib Geel? I'd glady devour her, burp, scratch my near to bursting belly and fall into a dreamy diabetic coma. But alas t'was not to be. *Grabs Adam by the scruff of his shirt and force feeds chocolate-honeys right hand into his mouth nearly soffocating him in the process* It would be rude and un-Somali of me not to share my feast my friend ...You know what they say? Share and share alike.

One step back for man-One giant leap for womankind. The redundancy of men is sure to follow, praise be the lord! *Shakes about her jazz hands and strolls off* All thats left now is to turn anything with a Y chromosome into a manufactured sex product and all will be well in the world.

Ps Do you have more Adam? Or does anyone else wish to share any amusing tales or anecdotes? Yes I am desperate for some entertainment. Who isn't?

^- Very true exercising ones pen-will more than likely bare the sweetest of fruits, you know what they say? Practise makes perfect and one cannot be a writer if one doens't exercise such a skill. Not that I believe myself to be a "writer" by any stretch of the imagination mind you-just saying. *Salutes to both Ibti and Marx* -Plus Marx well what can I say in my defense apart from agreeing with your fair sentiments? Adam about the story? I liked it very much, the whole greek mythological angle was very well recieved as I do love a good greek tragedy, which brings me to the test for psychopathic killers. OMG- I really shouldn't be admitting this but I got your riddle which was in truth (very easy) immediately and long before I even strolled down the page to see what the others answers were (Truly I got the answer in about a second. Now I'm more than a little worried, I already did a psych test once before in my A level Psychology days way back and even then it concluded that I had/have a significant amount of psychophatic tendencies and now I have this to contend with. *Worryingly bites her nails* Damn you for making me question my stability!

I have several- especially one epic tale that I've had in my mind for many years now but never have I had the chance perhaps the patience and dare I say? The talent to bring it to life? I'm a great story teller but will that translate to writing ability? One never knows, and though I've had enough compliments in my life to give me a big head-I've never placed much importance into any of them as the real question for me is.... Do I have the perseverance to start something I may never finish? Can I actually take anything seriously without giggling and enjoying my silliness too much? The juries out on this one. Ps Adam- feel free to share any stories with us, they would be greatly enjoyed I am sure especially since its often rather (boring) in this place if I am honest. Plus I am far too lazy to post anything myself LOL- I know, oh hypocrisy!

^- How can you hate wearing diracs? Good lord woman its a breath of fresh air and the way it drags on the floor only adds to its appeal. Stop being so sissified and put this on! *Smacks her over the face with a Dirac and runs off* Paragon- Whats alluring? Diracs? Well they are floaty-like silky and see-through I guess it call be quite exciting especially when its coated with sweet smelling uunsi and cuud. Still, what are you getting at? *Squints with suspicion*

Erhem…excuse me? But I’m with faheema on this one and in truth the fact that we’re even discussing this infuriates me. Why is it that it’s always us women who have to make the compromises and are slapped with ultimatums of fatness or some other ridiculous proposal- when will we stop being st*pid sheep that live for nothing but the fanciful whims of frivolous men? Never will you find a topic about fat men or how men are getting too big for their boots or men's right to work, or what men should or should not have the right to wear. Its always women, women, women. GOOD GOD WHY! *Screams* If I want to put on weight and have my stomach drag on the floor in gluttony if need be then it shall be my own choice! I'd rather slit my own throat then even indulge some idi*t’s western ideas beauty. Ps *Waves at CH* LOL

^- Oh what lies you gorge yourself upon. What red bloodied Somali woman would take your advice in fashion. Paragon- And why is that may I ask? Already measuring me up for my hido iyo daqan wedding dress are ya? My we work very fast.

Mr Oodweyne – Waar maxaad ka hadlaysa? Did you even read what I wrote? Had you done so you would have seen that I clearly indicated that Riyaale and his full breasted wife had nothing to do with this incident. Which actually involved nothing more than two neighboring clans/families fighting over some land…as usual. The last time a couple of blank dudes where killed by reer blanks and now? This is probably some stup*d form of pay back. They could have at least kept the killing in the family. But no-they involved outside innocents. I also have this on good authority and (Know a good amount of detail as to the real reasons, motivations, where precisely it happened etc) so I would appreciate it, if you didn’t open your mouth to speak as if you were some sort of benevolent wizard who knows all. I don’t appreciate being spoken to like a child. Ps My apologies people, I had no idea Qabiils were not to be discussed I was merely stating a few details but I shall adhere to the rules. Didn’t think in truth that the mentioning of a few tribes were an issue-but judging from our history I sense this may be a good thing perhaps.

^- I doubt it *Winks* Ps the dudes who killed those ***** dudes? Were ****** Reer Gabilay. Fighting as always for land. Now I shall leave having outed both qabiils. Its only fair I out the other tribe involed as well. Not that its important. A death of an innocent is a death of an innocent.

GeneralDuke- Excuse me but...why should I do that? The edditing I mean.

Ps, Oh yes and that is Boorama- I'd recognise Amoud university and the door near its library anywhere. Infact....(I'll stop no more information need be exposed) LOL *Skips off*

^- Thats classified information.

Originally posted by Che -Guevara: Acuudi Bilaah, such arbitray killing of innocent men, we are f*cked people. I couldn't agree more. *Tuts* Men the most idiotic creation the world has ever known. Also to the man who suggested that Riyaale was against the killings of those 6 ****** men? Why would he order such a ridiculous thing when his own wife is ******? I just can't picture the man ever being able to sleep again in peace after having ordered his wifes innadeers deaths. As usual the thirst for land, greed and stup*dity continues- I only hope this tension is dealt with immediately before it turns into a ****** Vs ******** civil war. There is nothing to be gained via the incitement of more bloodshed. As to the imbeciles who've killed a couple of innocent men in some sort of twisted ethic retribution for the deaths of their own people? They're simply pathetic and spineless bast@rds who deserve to be killed via the correct judicial system ASAP. This should be nipped in the bud before the sh*t hits the fan, as is more often the case with us blood-lustful Somali's. Still the raising of a few blue flags mean nothing. [ July 13, 2009, 04:47 PM: Message edited by: Libaax-Sankataabte ]

Yes I know of two adorable identical twin boys. Cute little things indeed.

Good luck to them indeed, those tahreeb-ing men and women sure do have some kinda guts. I have nothing but respect for them- just thinking of all the sacrifices and hazards they've faced is enough to make me shiver.

You know this notion of casual wear is an interestingly western concept in the sense that for us as Somali's wearing a non expensive Diiric or sheed around the home is a casual occurance. (Not the wearing of casual clothes-persay but this idea which insinuates that a dirac and sheed is not casual) Me personally? I'm wearing one now and always wear either a soft dirac or sheed at home with an appropriate googarad and garbasaar. Thats what I feel most comfortable in- when I come home I can relax, be myself and let it all hand out. No sophisticated galoo nonsense do I wear but a simple bag-like cotten dress which allows the breeze to flow through me, suugo and laxoox stains ahoy! LOL -I kid no suugo stains I've grow old of such things. Truly I have...

^- huh *shocked* well I am utterly insulted are you insinuating perchance that you were defiled of sorts in the other ODE thread? And thus require the production of a mew ODE to redeem yourself? For shame... Worry not however I shall cease teasing you lest I taint your sainthood lol Ps To the thread- BOB-Whoever you are weirdly I kinda liked your poem. And to paragon I shall leave you with this "Xalimo thou art like an Anjero blessed"...Oh how romantic, every Somali woman is bound to swoon having been compared to such a renowned exotic delicacy. LOL Adios

^- LOL Oops I just figured out something, Zulfa there has been a mistake my sister- my initial comment about not being fond of Marx was directed at Adam-not you. I have no doubt that your as lovely as cookies and cream and wouldn’t detest anyone! Ignore my jibe about the prizes..I thought you were insinuating that I too was Marx and thus asking that I reward you for voting for me aka Marx. See? Its all a tangled messy web Paragon- And I get the impression from you (judging by your wide grin) that your fond of four-bellied hags. If so you are permitted the pleasure of rubbing my 3rd belly in particular(lifts up her shirt to wobble her four bellies).