Originally posted by Dhulqarnayn -alSumaale: Sorry to burst your bubble but the kind of non muslim men and women Somali women and men go after are not husband or wife material that is IMO by default DYSFUNCTIONAL EDIT: Don't bite my head off but i'm speaking from own experiences i have a friend who's been seeing a ajnabi girl since we were 17(we are both 21 now) and he's been struggling in life ever since in terms of education,social life, family etc etc he's smokes weed drinks alcohol(he knew none of this crap before he met her and was doing well in school) compare this to my brothers friend who married a Somali and has totally changed his personal ways(no more streetfights no more smoking stable job etc etc) ummm, see thats the thing, you cant base your opinion on people through your limited experiences. sure, bad influence can definitely put an individual off track just like good influence can put someone on track like the two situations you just mentionned, but unfortunately not all muslims/somalis are a good influence and some non-muslims follow a better more halal lifestyle than our brothers and sisters. im sorry about your friend, but we have to learn to investigate ourselves before others. why couldnt he have been a positive influence on that girl instead of being sucked into her negative lifestyle? things arent as black and white as wed like them to be. furthermore, how many conversion stories do we know of where one half of a married couple is initially non-muslim and eventually accepts islam? and than there are the couples, im assuming the ones youre speaking of, where islam and da'wah doesnt play a factor at all. i still think they can be happy, unfortunately the pleasures of this life dont always translate in the hereafter and im not going to pretend they are miserable in this life to validate my point of view. btw didnt mean to bite your head, just enjoying the discussion.

1) i dont think outsiders should have a say as to what shld happen in somalia or any other foreign country. its all hypothesis and wishful thinking. no change will occur without the people, and they have a stronger say as to what kind of change and how it should happen. that goes for us living in ajnabi land. now im going to completely ignore this first point by expanding on some other thoughts. 2) there is no islamisation of somalia, somalia is muslim. 3)islam is not political, shariah is not political. its purpose is to establish and protect the rights of the people, whether muslim or non muslim. this is something muslims are failing worldwide whenever they say they are trying to establish an islamic state. furthermore, though i do not believe that islam should be reformed, i do believe more dialogue is necessary and so is basic education on our deen especialy concerning the rights of women, prisoners of war, and non muslims. i have concerns about alot of things that you mentioned, but id like to say that islam, the way it was practiced during the prophets time pbuh, is very "progressive" concerning human rights and very compatible with many supposedly western ideals. i think muslims are going through an identiy crisis at the moment. we feel the need to assert ourselves in the most unhealthy manners from one extreme (abusing the deen) to another (abusing all others). we need to be confident enough to say that there are good aspects in non-muslim societies and not to be afraid to incorporate them (so long as it is halal of course), without necessarily hijacking it (saying, muslims were the first to blah blah bla). we also need to create an environment where muslims and people in general can ask questions about the religion without feeling like they are apostacizing for it or like they are being disrespectful. shariah is getting a bad name because it has failed to do its main task: protecting the rights of the citizens whether muslim or non muslim. those rights are 1) religion. protecting islam, but also the right to choose and practice your religion. 2) life, all life whether male, female, muslim or non muslim 3)intellect (meaning no 1984 thought police, or denial of education for whatever reason.) 4) lineage (thats where marriage comes in) 5)wealth it seems we protect our religion, alhamdulillah, but everything else seems to go out the window.

i saw a green smilie in your post but know this; those going for Ajnabi non muslims are just trophy women and men , satisfying those in need of something 'exotic' and when that 'need' is gone so are they. [/QB] why do we find it necessary to put sentence on things we dont understand? the halal is better than the haraam, alhamdulillah, but dont assume what a relationship "must be like" because it serves youre ideology. for the most part the main difference between muslims and non muslims will be apparant on the day of judgement, and the validity of non muslim-non muslim vs muslim-non muslim relationships vs muslim-muslim will be settled than as well cause by the looks of it, theyre just about the same. some healthy ones, some dysfunctional ones, some depressing ones and some uplifiting ones. *breathe* sorry, i just wantd to get that out of my chest.

Originally posted by Ameen: Today, I realized many people think its actually going to be the year 2008. We're Muslim so open the Islamic calendar and you'll notice its only 1428. Enjoy the night but dont ever forget that the year is 1428. dude, were using the standard calendar of the place we are situated... even the hijri calendar doesnt begin with the onset of islam, but with the departure of the muslims to medina... meaning they only started counting at a certain point to have a "standard" calendar. today, was cool. i got my lil' bro to hang out with me and watch a film with me which is a huge accomplishment cause he was about to go out with his friends... I WIN!!!

^^^or some smack upside the head.

i think its ridiculous to let your underage, still in highschool or junior high SON or DAUGHTER to travel on their own unsupervised. you think there arent predators going after young boys too? its a parents job to watch out for their kids, and to make it a point to be involved in their childrens lives. as far as im concerned there shouldnt be one set of rules for boys and a different set for girls. young boys fall victim to predators as well and make poor judgement calls of their own. do you not watch the news? btw, what is with youre disclaimer? you asked people for their opinion and than pre-emptively censored some peoples point of view.

wareer badana

*crickets* come on guys, i know youre alot more hospitable than this. say hi to the newbie and school him on proper etiquette. hello newbie... sisters dont like corny lines and we have enough lame attempts on macking in the womens section, so leave it alone. heres a good place to waste time, learn some new things and some not so new things, and make some e-friends. welcome.

ummm, i dont know any muslims trying to create a muslim state... i do see some on the news though. personally, i like canada, and its secularism because it doesnt interfere with my faith in any way. right now there arent any sucessful countries, if we are talking about standard of living matched with basic human rights outside of north america and europe, but that has nothing to do with religion. colonialism plays a huge factor, corruption of leaders, and said successful countries aiding the corrupt leaders is a huge factor and that includes "muslim" leaders too (see saudi arabia). there is alot wrong with the muslim world today, but it has more to do with us straying away from the teachings of muhamad (pbuh) and rejecting all dialogue that makes us even a tad bit uncomfortable. we should be supportive of new thoughts, ideas, freedom of expresion, that is our deen. muslims are just insecure now a days.

i think that is a little bit unfair king koya. i mean, i was with you in the beginning, muslims now a days are behaving terribly especially towards people of other faiths, but lets be real we're not treating our own bro's and sis' in faith too well either (see sudan, saudi arabia). however, dont you think its a little presumptious, not too mention insulting, to assume we didnt do some research? majority of the people on this website are educated, literate, middle class. i mean, if we're judging God's religion by his creation, unfortunately we will always be disappointed. i could find some terrible horrendous things christians are/were guilty of, especially during the crusades, but i wont make the mistake of blanketting the entire belief system as evil. i dont think there are any "evil" religions, i do believe that there is one true religion, but the other ones are not in existence because of evil. humans create religion to explain the unexplainable aspects of the universe, or to create social cohesion, but not for evil... the devil spreads his evil waswaas everywhere though, regardless of if its the true religion or not. also, seeing as a lot of us are in north america and europe, dont you think it would be easier on us to discard our religion than to continue being walking targets for the masses? im sure there are muslims, somalis included, who have investigated the deen and left it, and im sure there are some who also left it because of what they hear about islam in the media, but thats life. in true islam, the way the prophet mohammed pbuh, taught us and practiced it, there is no compulsion in religion. if youre born into a muslim family, of course you will be indoctrinated into an islamic lifestyle but at some point in your life you will have to make a decision. i agree with you about people should be encouraged to investigate things, especially the things we take for granted like identity.

^^^ thats not cool. i mean to just discredit her like that. i dont want to believe muslims did this, but look at the track record, this is our m.o (see vincent van goh, sudan english school teacher, the list is endless). i think its really sad that we think that physical violence is what will solve people's criticism about islam. let them criticize or even insult, do you think it harms Allah? theyre jst harming themselves.

a mixture between a sheep and a cow??? do you bite your nails?

cool. point 9 i believe is just saying if you yourelf are a positive and happy person, you will attract positive and happy people. furthermore you will be open to gratifying experiences (doors that you ddnt notice were open are now wide open). anybody get S.A.D (seasonal a**** disorder)?

other than in my text books? nope. have i seen its inspirations? campbell chicken noodle sooup anyone? my question: what is your standard for good art?

^^^that last part is hard, esp when it comes to family. im becoming a bit of a nag.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sLGLum5SyKQ i believe thats two questions. last thing that captivated me? allah forgive me, i think i dont notice alot of things. i just cut myself a pomegranate, that is a pretty captivating fruit. we're told we'll get something similar in paradise. actually that is the only reason i buy them. i think the structure of ths fruit is beautiful, within it i see an allegory for true beauty, if i had a firmer grasp of any language id write a poem. though i wouldnt describe this as being captivated- cause i cleaned the mess as best i could and now im munching on it. its still pretty cool. my question: how old were you when you realized youre parents are only human.

i dont know much about other cities, but i actually long for somethign a little more rural. im not very adventurous. question: can you do the soulja boy dance?

okay, i think the person with the ridiculously long nick is me. so ill answer taht question and the one above me. i am not finished school, ive been studying part time for the past 2 and half years, insha Allah i will be finished my bachelors next year(if youve been paying attention to the thread you ll see in what field)/ next question, my plan for the holidays? its actually changed alot- initially i planned to work overtime, get some reading done, avoid a particular family member whos coming to visit and go to RIS w my lil' bro. Than I found out my big sis is coming to visit, which means I cant go to RIS and Im going to have to be strategic about my work hours and avoiding this other family member will be more difficult. my question: do you believe a somali can be an only child?

everybody is guilty of this. at one point in your life, and even in the future youre gonna look down on someone for whatever reason... but i believe the prophet pbuh called this delusion (he said arrogance is not accepting reality; the reality is you aint that fly/holy to begin with homie). good advice none the less. we have to curb our enthusiasm/strong feelings and consider how things are going to be interpreted. the prophet pbuh, above all things was very considerate.

valued possession? umm, i dont think i have one. i dont take care of anything... oh maybe memory. i had this discussion with someone who made a strong point about memory being the single thing most human cant survive with, cause it stores everything, even your beliefs (i answered Allah, bt she was like, yeah but if you kept forgetting everything evey 10 min how would you konw youre a muslim?). i dont know if htat was clear, but eh. my question: do you get along with your siblings?

uuhhh, where is the question? okay ill ask anyways. do you know your neighbours first and last name?

i am celebrating tomorrow, but the rest of my city is celebrating on thursday. weird.

i think im reveiling alot about myself via my questions...

if crazy is all around you, how do you stop it from following you to your new family/future?

maaaan, new rule. you cant throw back my questions, we have to be creative man. no diary, i had one as a teen, and my mom read it. she wasnt discreet at all, she'd be quoting me and ish. -"the problem is that you dream too much"... - "thanks mum, but i already know that, i even noted it in my diary on page... heeeeey." i think it relieved her my life was really as boring as i let out. question: how do you break the cycle of family dysfunction?