Blessed, I don't know if such women have the right to object, it does seem rather harsh though, move or else. Having said that, what is the point of marriage if you would live apart? The whole point is to be together. Maybe they don't deserve it but they should share in the blame that broke up their marriage. We all know (some)men are fickel humans.

Scarlet, Nur isn't pleasing anybody, he is still firm in his pro-polygamy stance if you read carefully, only now he has decided to shade light to another side of the circle, although not completly. Nur, I still think there are two types of sacrefice. To the average person sacrifice for the family means sticking to your family & working out your problems, regardless of how hard things seem. However, I have noticed that from the religious brothers who are pro-polygamy, the sacrefice for them is 'saving' some poor Xalimo from being without a man, heaven forbid. As in widows, or spinsters or just the avarge Xalimo who isn't bothered to find her own hubby. So for them, sacrefice is centered on helping these above mentioned Xalimos, they are in it for the extra good deeds they will get out of it, and usually have some sort of slef-sacrefice image of themsleves. It's just which of these two types of sacrefice is of greater importance to the individual/family. The situations you mention still need time to be pondered over. I think it's dangerous for any woman as well as husband to be so far away from their families as it will lead both to temptation. It's not always the right answer, maybe family should be put before money more often or perhaps these families should have more iman and have each other instead of a paycheck each month. I also find that some women actually prefer to have a distance between them and the husbands rather than deal with their problems, only to create worse ones.

Her name is Neomie and She used to be NEXT model too. She is doing a big lingere campiagn for M&S at the moment.

I don't know what all the fuss is about. P.S. German economy has been slipping for almost a decade now.

I was going through InStyle bag collections online and saw these stylish baby bags (or they call it diaper bags). I know we got some mums on SOL and I though they looked cool and fahsionable. Here is the site because I don't know how to get the pics up: http://www.miabossi.com/bags/sp06/images/lg_maria_pink.jpg http://www.miabossi.com/bags/sp06/images/lg_maria_toffee.jpg http://www.miabossi.com/bags/sp06/images/lg_maria_cherry.jpg They are all from www.miabossi.com

^^lol. Thank you.

What I find funny is when tourists think they can go up the stairs in some stations rather than wait for the lift. For example in Russel Square it clearly warns you that there is about 213 steps, lol. I feel sorry for the poor fools. Believe me, the 2 min wait for the lift is worth it.

A good read Amelia. About time we see it from another perspective. Especially the absent fathers issue, how sad that Somali communities will soon be just as the African American/Carribean communites in regard to absent fathers when back home fathers were the heros and pride of their families.

Interesting posts. We need to remember that everyone is at a different level of Iman, some are at the 5 pillars of Islam while others are confident in the Science of Hadith. Let's be more tolerant and if someone says something wrong just point it out without more name calling. I remember that at uni, after sep 11, there was this one Aisan brother who got a lot of grief, I remember ppl called him 'Osama' because he still wore his khamis & beard, folded trousers. Seeing him go about his business without being intimidated made me feel proud to be Muslim. First and foremost you wear the Hijab to please Allah. After that it serves us with many other purposes as well, it reminds us that our body is temporary and we should focus on our souls. It serves to promote the religion of Allah, when people see you wearing it freely, they know you are Muslim and this might serve to challenge their views that women are opressed in Islam. Similarly, it's a living, breathing testemony of none has the right to be worshipped but Allah, so kind of like a living dawa. When I get on the tube on my journey home from work and see the annoyed look of some women it makes me smile, I must be doing something right. So the scarf does a lot more than limit the gazes of wandering eyes.

Macawiis, shocking to know nomads are so fascinated about this issue that it has a big response. Personally, I don't think mcawiis does anything for the figure. It should only be worn by men, and even that indoors.

Well, I'm into low calorie organic candy that due to its nature and prise can certainly not be shared. Perhaps brother Nur can arrange something for you in return for boosting his statistics.

lol@ yahoo, if we can get one to agree on your behalf you should praise the Lord. Sharing...looks like we are getting somewhere, feelings are kreeping into it. What a shock.

I wonder if the roles were reserved, if Nur was willing to share his wife .

Alle Ubahane, do you see every woman on the planet who wants to stand up for herself or say 'hey this isnt in my best ineterest' as a feminist? If that's the case then the word should be a equated with women. Blessed, I wasn't disagreeing with you.

^^^ They seem to be inventing a new phrase everyday. Now there is something called 'Jihadists', I mean what the **** does that mean? As if extremists/fundementalists/Islamists wasnt enough. I wonder what it will be tmwr? Quranists? :rolleyes: Seriously though, this is disturbing. I think it's good we record the things that are said. All I can say is, the Jews of Europe didn't wake up one day and were gassed.

Nur, if a man is financially stable and can afford two wifes, I still do not see how he can go to work, be there for both (or more) homes, be there for his children, mind you with whom he does not live under the same roof with everyday thus not being aware of everything that goes on. Just how many times can a man divide himself to please everyone? And will a Farax be less likely to gaze at women down the street or on tv if he has 4 waiting at home for him? I doubt that. I just think it would be incredible to suceed in such a marriage. It might work for some, but I wish the rest of us would be spared this constant promotion of multiy-partner marriges. Suffice to say we are not going to agree on this issue.

It does go both ways, being a father is not limited to providing a pay check at the end of each week/month. Blessed, I can see where you are coming from but I think it's equally dangerous to galamourize motherhood as the hight of happiness. It helps to know what you are getting yourself into and not be just seduced by cute chubbied babies.It's all about balance as with everything else in life. With a lot of patience and support, mothers can (that dreaded phrase) have it all. Like I said a certain period of being a housewife cannot be avoided but that is not to say that women cannot contribute to science, technology, education and everything else outisde the home that concerns both parties of the human race.

If there are only a handful of Somali men who are fully competent in their responsebilities towards their 6 children or so and xalimos in the West, I would be the first to congratuale them on their second marriges. And just how do you explain to children with a western mindset you will be remarrying without making them & their mothers feel unloved? Again, looks like 1st pirority is the struggle for raising God-fearing kids. Looks like we still have a long way to go.

Jamelia, I love his dresses. It's about time women dressed up and looked more fem. I wish ppl would burn their jeans for a bit.

Most women who decide to have children will be housewifes at some point or another in their life, that doesn't mean their entire life. I don't agree with the way it has been presented in this article but there is nothing shocking behind the idea that children need their mothers. And it's not like all the women in the entire population will be all working at one point. What really annoys me is when women who are housewifes (or domestic engineers as the politically correct word is)are made to feel like they do nothing and watch daytime tv all day. It's a more important and complicated job than anything else. Anyway, who made man the standard? Women shouldn't have to act like men to get the respect they deserve. Every woman will need to decide for herself what is her pirority.

I like the look Jimca ^^

Thanks all, Castro & Ahura, very helpful. I know it takes a while to do something you want. I have worked in lots of different places, mainly temping and you see so many bright people doing reception/secretarial work. It’s so depressing. I felt better reading Evening Standard about ppl who have applied for 600 jobs with no response :eek: and Cambridge economic graduates are doing manual work. I did my MA and now I'm beginning to think what use has it got? People tell you to get experience, but if you have noticed now you need proven 'prior interest' to even get voluntary work experience. And how practical is it to be doing that when you have mounting student loans? Ahura, like yourself I was interested in NGO/Charity sector but unfortunately I developed a conscience, another problem. I did a couple of placements and its mind-numbing admin work. I don't really want to get into that. Then there is the problem of NGOs. They are part of the problem. They don't really help Third World countries too many of these African specialists operate in EU countries, and to much of the money allocated for these needy people goes towards overhead costs. It wouldn't be ethical to work in such an org. I keep finding work in fiance, I have nothing to do with field. Maybe God is trying to tell me something. I envy the people who have done technical degrees. It must be easy for them. Being able to get into almost any field is itself a curse. I guess its dive into it.

I know a lot of the Nomads have been graduates for quiet some time now. How many of you have been successful in finding work in your field of study? Too many graduates work in other fields. Is everyone just concerned with paying the bills? I mean how can you make sure you actually find a job in your field before you are weighted down by responsibility? It's a really frustrating trend.

I promised not to get involved in this gender tit for tat, but here is something I read the other day that might console you Alexus, not my words! 'Men are very strange.They can beat you up, shout at you, threaten you, and they're scared to death of women really. Perhaps not the woman they married, but there's always one woman who frightens them and forces them to submit to her caprices. Even if it's their own mother' Paulo Coelho.

If you look back into history, it was quiet the norm for 13 year olds, even 11 year olds to get married. Clearly it is inappropriate today for bilogical & social reasons to marry at such a young age. It is however hypocritical to accuse someone of something that was not realized as harmful at the time. Why don't we call Kings and Men of Power in Europe who had child brides? Why not the ones in China? It was a norm and a practice of a bygone age. It has nothing to do with the charcter of individuals or religion. Who knows what we might see as Ok today in 1000 years they might frown upon? Now get over it and move on. Sheh lol@Woof.