May Allah grant him Janna, and give you the strenght to move on. Indeed it is a temporary stay on earth, so May Allah have mercy on all the muslims that have passes away. Sabir iyo Amiin Walaal. My deepest thoughts are with you.

In the Name of God, Most Gracious, Most Merciful I hope it is beneficial to all those wondering?? Insha Allah An Islamic Perspective on Divorce Marriage as prescribed by God, is the lawful union of a man and women based on mutual consent. Ideally, the purpose of marriage is to foster a state of tranquillity, love and compassion in Islam, but this is not always the case. Islam discourages divorce but, unlike some religions, does make provisions for divorce by either party. God provides general guidelines for the process of divorce with emphasis throughout on both parties upholding the values of justice and kindness in formalizing the end to their marriage (see Surah 2: 224-237 for general guidelines regarding divorce). God encourages the husband and wife to appoint arbitrators as the first step to aid in reconciliation in the process of divorce. If the reconciliation step fails, both men and women are guaranteed their right to divorce as established in the Qur'an, but the question lies in what is the procedure for each. When a divorce is initiated by the man, it is known as talaq. The pronouncement by the husband may be verbal or written, but once done, a waiting period of three months ('iddat) must take place in which there are no sexual relations even though the two are living under the same roof. The waiting period helps prevent hasty decisions made in anger and enables both parties to reconsider as well as determine if the wife is pregnant. If the wife is pregnant, the waiting period is lengthened until she delivers. At any point during this time, the husband and wife are free to resume their relationship, thereby stopping the divorce process. At this time, the husband remains financially responsible for the support of his wife. The divorce initiated by the wife is known as khu" (if the husband is not at fault) and entails the wife giving her dowry to end the marriage because she is the "contract" breaker. In the instance of talaq where the husband is the "contract" breaker, he must pay the dowry in full in cases where all or part of it was deferred. In the case that the husband is at fault and the woman is interested in divorce, she can petition a judge for divorce, with cause. She would be required to offer proof that her husband had not fulfilled his responsibilities. The judge would make that determination based on the facts of the case and the law of the land. It the woman had specified certain conditions in her marriage contract, which were not met by the husband, she could obtain a conditional divorce. The controversy with divorce lies in the idea that men seem to have absolute power in divorce. The way the scholars in the past have interpreted this is that if the man initiates the divorce, then the reconciliation step for appointing an arbiter from both sides is omitted. This diverges from the Qur'anic injunction. The differences in powers of the husband and wife with regard to divorce can be extracted from the following verse: ...but, in accordance with justice, the rights of the wives (with regard to their husbands) are equal to the (husbands;) rights with regard to them, although men have precedence over them (in this respect). And God is almighty wise. (2:228) It is in the next verse, according to existing interpretations, the reason for the small difference: Men shall take full care of women with the bounties which God has bestowed more abundantly on the former than on the latter, and with what they may spend out of their possessions. And the righteous women are the truly devout ones, who guard the intimacy which God has (ordained to be) guarded. (4:34) It is clear that the Qur'an states there is a "degree" of difference with regards to the rights of men and women in divorce, but it is not clear "how much" and "what" privileges a man is entitled to. This is what has been interpreted by the jurists. It should also be noted if the difference is due in part to the man being the financial supporter, then it must follow that if the woman shares or is the main financial contributor to the family that this privilege should apply to her as well. Many of the laws regarding divorce are the scholars' interpretations of the relatively few Qur'anic references. As with all human laws, they must adapt to dynamic circumstances. Issues like custody have become controversial. For example, the Qur'an advises the husband and wife to consult each other in a fair manner regarding their children's future after divorce (2:232-3) Various laws regarding custody of the children have been legislated by a few of the jurists. Some jurists have stipulated that custody of the child is awarded to the mother if the child is under a certain age and to the father if the child is older. There is no Qur'anic text to substantiate the arbitrary choosing of age as a determinant for custody. Similarly with regard to the issue of alimony, the Qur'an addresses the ex-husband's financial obligation to his ex-wife but it does not provide a specific formula for the amount of support (2:241, 65:4-7). This is open for negotiation between parties and should be in proportion with the husband's financial income. There has been much distortion and propagation of mistruth about a woman's rights in the matters of marriage and divorce. It is only with self-education and awareness of the Qur'anic text that both men and women can come to know the truth of what God has prescribed and to evaluate the scholarly interpretations closely to ensure that the spirit of justice is carried out: When you divorce women and they fulfill the term of their (Iddat), either take them back on equitable terms or set them free on equitable terms; but do not take them back to injure them, (or) to take undue advantage; if anyone does that, he wrongs his own soul. Do not treat God's Signs as a jest, but solemnly rehearse God's favors on you, and the fact that He sent down to you the Book and Wisdom, for your instruction. And fear God, and know that God is well-acquainted with all things. (2:231)

Men See You As Choosy Men notice you light years before you notice them You take a selective approach to dating, and you can afford to be picky You aren't looking for a quick flirt - but a memorable encounter It may take men a while to ask you out, but it's worth the wait

Hey, Hey Hibo: I cannot beleive you are a world away. How time has changed. What are you studying in Paki? I apologize, as I am not even sure what is going on next door? Wow, what a story Hibo. You know people, and especially Somalis, they love to gossip, if anyone knows...we should know! No matter where they are, I guess it is their gene or something. Any who, I wish you the best of luck sis. Do not let them get to you, for you should know that they are not even worth your time, or attention. We miss you very much here, and once in a while we will see a girl that resembles you, and be all like "doesn't she remind you of Hibo." We had a crazy time, but it was all love at the end. You migh not have had the greatest experience here at MSU, but I hope you look back on it, and at least ponder about what could've been?? However traveling the world, and having had the experience you had, I am pretty sure is the most riching experience one can have. best of luck walaalo. Keep your head up! ayaan

I had rough start today. I gotta phone call, this afternoon about mother, and how she hurt her back. To top it off she wasn't answering her phone, so it really got to me, to the point where I just broke down. Finally got a hold of her, almost cried, but she is doing well. Said she went for a walk, and that everyone was home, they just didn't pick-up the phone "Then I yelled at my brother." I just hate it when I am not informed. So there. I wrote my mom a poem, just to let her know how much I appreciate her, and that she means the world to me. I just finished a take home exam part, and feeling a bit too hot, it's just dam hot in here. I could go on, but that's about it for today!!! Tata!! ayaan

What are the words to tell you how grateful I am? Mommy, Hooyo, Umi. It amazes me how humble you are at all times. Never letting anything get to you. Your Understanding heart is what makes me fell whole. Your attitude towards life is just a miracle to witness. You love with all your heart, because you know love can conquer all. I know Allah is a big part of your life, and I guess in life if learned anything from your Is to be grateful to Allah for all that he has done for us. My love for you can not be shown, or told. It is something that I keep in mind and heart. When I am going through hard times, though I think to myself no one will understand, I think of you and get teary. I wish for you happiness, and paradise after this life. You are an amazing woman, and a wonderful mother. I thank Allah for making you my mother, for I know you are as grateful to have me as your daughter. Your intelligence is so easily seen, your kindness felt by those you come in contact. I know I met the mentor of my life the day you gave me birth. Hooyo Kheyr baan kuu rajaynayaa. With all my love. Hooyo I adore you.

Happy, Happy Women's day to all. I have had a great day today. Our school had a International Women's Luncheon and we had several somali women from the community who have volunteered to do a buraanbur(it litterly moved me to tears). Basically the Buraanbur talked about the hardships, we are going through, the expections we have for our men,and the let down we face daily...it was emotionally moving to say the least! So this is for all the Women in the world, May Allah make your stay on earth as pleasant as it can be, and bless you with health, wisdom, and courage to face the world. Like my mother would say...huuno caano iyo malab!! ayaanck!

Greetings everyone: Hmmmm: I am just flattered at how many of you thought of the idea. Now what to take with you...I say take yourself first, than perhaps you can have everything you need shipped over!! Hey there is DHL..which will soon reach somalia as well. So I am hoping. I personally would like to take my mother with me, for I know she is yearning to go home more than anyone that I know!! peace and my Allah bless us, and our Land!!!

Greetings everyone: May peace of Allah be upon you all. If you could go home, and home being somalia, what would you do? Where in Somalia would you go? Who would you contact first? What would you take with you from here? It is a fact that some of us will never have the chance to go back, whether through free will or not. I pray Insha Allah that someday, we will have to chance to visit our country, or even go back and live there. I certianly tend to return for good, as soon as I can see some progress towards peace. I miss everything about home, and my memory is lessing by the day. This is devastating to me. I guess being here, out in the west has taught me that, there is nothing better than a land that screams your name. peace

loooool.... does anyone know where Darman is?

Sophist!!! Thank..you...thank you!!!

Thanks Darman! I was never gone...but I apprecaite the welcome. It never hurts to be missed? anywho ladies...the list by no means is necessary, it's just a list,,a figure of speech, not a must, but should...get it!!! So don't please disrespect each other, for that does no good for us!! Women should always respect one another...?? Peace and be loved !! ayaan

Hahah: Interesting ladies. We are making fun each other. Any ways the list is by...... be back!!

I am glad you found it usefull

Two book first and for most. A mighty collision of two worls! and OffSpring of Paradise!!! Safi Abdi The author is my sister, and must support the family!!! Moving along! Things Fall Apart! When I was puertorican In the times of the Butterflies Our Ecological Footprints! ...I could go on!!!

A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .one old love she can imagine going back to... and one who reminds her how far she has come... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own even if she never wants to or needs to... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .something perfect to wear if the employer or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .a youth she's content to leave behind.... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .a past juicy enough that she's looking forward to retelling it in her old age.... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black ace bra... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .one friend who always makes her laugh... and one who lets her cry... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family... A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE .a feeling of control over her destiny... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .how to fall in love without losing herself... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .HOW TO QUIT A JOB, BREAK UP WITH A LOVER, AND CONFRONT A FRIEND WITHOUT RUINING THE FRIENDSHIP... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .when to try harder... and WHEN TO WALK AWAY... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .that she can't change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .that her childhood may not have been perfect...but its over... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .what she would and wouldn't do for love or more... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .how to live alone... even if she doesn't like it... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .whom she can trust, whom she can't, and why she shouldn't take it personally... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .where to go... be it to her best friend's kitchen table... or a charming inn in the woods... when her soul needs soothing... EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW... .what she can and can't accomplish in a day... a month...and a year...

We judge, and judge, and judge. I just wonder how far this judging will take us. I am not all for his potraying of the Somali culuture, and for that matter who he is trying to make appealing for. For our culture is what it is, and will remain what it is for as long as we have a culuture. Truly it is sad to see our people go at it, for they know better, or chose not to know any. In the mean time, why don't we all go back being critics, of the world, and its inhibants! I see that no place is safe with you all occupying. Making everyone walk on egg-shells around!! Tatatatata

Welcome: We have something in common, except your doing something about it. I really love making documentaries...films, cause like you said, there aren't good ones out there. Occupation: Student, Location: Minnesota Sex: Gabar what I do when people are not looking...hmm I can't say!!! To: Rudy: YOu know what they say great minds think a like. I was thinking to invade Somaliland...what a small world!!!! peace PS..RUDY

Who Am I? I am a male rapper! Recognized by the United Nation as one of the youth who is making a positive change! Everything in my Album is very personal, and I wrote it all! Attended KCI!! <>

Who am I? I am a male activits A refugee advocate Living in North America Have been arrested recently! PS>> Thanks for recognizing my sister for being a public figure!! How sweet!

Let's face it! Allah gave us skin, all kinds of shades, therefor what right do we have in trying to change that? I love my skin complextion, and wouldn't change it for the world. We Somali women need to realize that beauty is within, and that changing your complextion will not make you more attractive, if you weren't to begin with. Love yourself for who are, not what you can become. Whoever said darkness is bad? I love the skin I am in! Ayaan

Wow:: Walaal Congrats. May Allah bless your marriage. Allah ha'idanka dhigo kuwii iska raaga, oo nolol wanaagsan ku nolaada. Mansha Allah, one thing is for sure whom ever this fella is, he is indeed very lucky!! So once again Congrats!! luv, ayaan

I guess we all have something in common. Missing our beloved country. I pray that someday we shell all return to our country Insha Allah J: Thanks for sharing your thoughts, I do appreciate to see another soul searching for that blue sky we had all left behind: Respectfully ayaan

A letter To Somalia: Dear Somalia, When I had left you at the age of 11, I never thought it would be forever. I had left you torn between those who thought they knew better then the others (as they like to call themselves, never recognizing that the others, were always a apart of them). I am sorry then you can you imagine, because I wanted to be there, and to protect you from them, but I was powerless, and thus I had to flee to save myself from them. If you are wondering how I am settled into my new home, wonder no more. I watched you, still surviving, holding on to what you have always held onto. Your dignity, and pride, that Somalia they can never take away. You have sheltered me, from the crazy world, and made me realize that what I had was the best of all. I love your patience, and I always wonder why can’t they be as patient as you are with them. Why are they always in a hurry of ruining your reputation? You are beautiful, indeed, you may not see it right now, because they had scared you for life, but even then, you are still beautiful. So Somalia, I ask you to be patient with me, as you have always, no one can do you justice, but I will try my best with Gods help someday, but I know you wondering when that day will be?? The one who misses you? ayan abdi After more than a decade of warring factions on the land of Somalia, followed by a massive brain drain from the land...one wonders what would that land say if it had speech? Those who had memoirs of my past glory are perhaps all gone or dead. But let me share with you this... that once upon a time I was fine, so wonderfully fine.. yieding blessings pure, an ambience of myrrh and sweet incense. And what a beauty to behold! From far and wide, those who came in droves made gains, attained goals. Today, I'm idle, a disabled mother. To every ticking brow a puzzle, sitting on grounded treasure. Some plague me non stop, some bruise me at every whim, some simply brush me aside, a nil, from every limb issues out a beloved. Wither go ye, my darling? Suffer ye not your loss? Perceive ye not my heaven? Pine for ye not for my shade? Ache not your pain? This poem is written by my sister Safi Abdi!

Soomalidu waxay ku maahmaahdaa runtu raga kama nixiso. Markii runtii la'idiin sheegana, waad naxaysaan. Hadii aan anigu runtii ka-hadlo raga hada jira, aad iyo aad bay u jilicsan yihiin. Taasina waxaan ku keenay, waxaan arakay rag aad utira badan, oo igu yiri marar badan "walaalay, aad buud u kulushayhay", even though anigu waxaan uun aan ku iri aay ilahayd xaaladu siday ku mudnayd. Hadii aad nagu leedihiin ha'hadlina oo uun iska aamusnaada no matter waxaan idunka samayno, dee taa si mashaqaynayso. Waxaa lagayaabaa, in ay jiraan dumar badan oo aamusnaanta u dhashay(taasi maha doqon nimo), teeda kale waxaa jira dumar badan oo u dhashay kulkulaylka(taasi ma aha waalin), laboda dhinacba dadku way kala duwan yihiin. Marka walaalayaal ha dii aad raadinaysaan qof dumara oo aan waxaba idinka o'anaynin, waxaan umalaynayaa, in wakhtigaas lasoo dhaafay. Badankiin tariikhda aduunka ha dii laraaco, Durmaku markasta waxay ahaanyeen kuwa wax raaca, wax dhaygsta, wax fala, laakiin aduunku uu isbadalay, ee labadalma baan idin oran laahaa. Gabari hadii ay kula fadhiisan karto, oo ay kula doodi karta, doesn't mean you must label her as a competitor, waxaad u fiiran kartaa qof iskaa barbar dhigtay, because she belongs there. see ya