I guess it is safe to say I set myself couple of nights ago a new record for most comments read on the internet! Oh well, eight years after, here comes another frustrated “Farax”; but this time in the form of Abdi. Haha Well, what can I say: the topic really captured my current frame of mind. Plus, the fact I found the comments to be really interesting (for the most part). But what amazed the most was how much I have in common with those brothers; as I find myself in the same shoes they were in 8 years ago. Caught up between our innate liking we (as Somali men) have for Somali women; and the kind of Somali women we are confronted with in the Diaspora. Talk about a lot of irate brothers! Lol Who knows: I may even be writing this message from the same University library they once were!
A lot of people really said a very interesting and worthwhile stuff. Most of all I really enjoyed reading the comments by the brother Mohamed. His general wisdom, experience, as well as his deep knowledge of Somali culture is what impressed me the most. Not to mention his cool demeanor in expressing himself. Something, unfortunately, we hot tempered brothers’ lack. Why I believe Jibriil, unfortunately, could not exactly get his message across effectively. Which is not the say “abeesooyinka” he spoke of did him any favor by exaggerating his claims i.e. he hate Somali women (blatant lie).
But wallahi, what those brothers spoke about is something real and serious which needs addressing immediately; before its too late! We f*cked ourselves up back home, and still continue to! :roll: And now we are about to do the something to ourselves in the diaspora. Not by leaving our nationhood in favor of qabiil; but leaving our culture and religion in favor of Western culture! Specifically, I am talking about the total distrust, indeed dislike, which exists between the brothers and sisters. Unfortunately, we are just not clicking. Some people, and I don’t remember all the nicks; but I believe it was bro. Seeker of Jannah and Poetess who said: the current state of affairs of the Somali nations is, what Bro. Malcolm X referred to as “the chickens coming home to roost” i.e. we are reaping what we saw. Of course, the women (most) were quick to allege he (Jibril) was “bitter” cuz he was dumped by one. But obviously, this is just a way of attacking the messenger rather than the message. The issue here is not rejection. That is okay, but the issue is much worse than that; hence, why some of us brothers are dismayed if not absolutely pissed off at the ‘sisters’. Of course, we should not generalize. But what Jibriil was talking about is a prevalent mindset: one, 8 years later, I myself is confronted with. For example, a sister gives you signs she is interested (likes you); okay, you are the man, you do what you are supposed to do: make the first move. Only to find yourself get you shot blocked! Oops! Lol But of course, Allah gave us balls to suck it up and dust ourselves off; and move on! But only to find yourself being chased after by the same girl! Essentially begging for your attention! She sees you sitting somewhere; and you know what is next: her as* walking up and down your face several times! Hmm, what does this chick want: does she think she can play you for a fool a second time? Or did she change her mind; even if she did: what does she think you are, some dog she can order around: sit, get up etc etc? Does she not know you have the pure and proud Somali blood running through your veins??
Hence, two people who probably liked one another can’t end up together cuz of the drama queens known as dumarkaan (qurbaha) Somalida. Like one sister suggested: I write bearing in mind non Somalis may be reading this. Until last night; I used to think such BS is unique to my neck of the woods: Canada. But I guess not. Something else the brothers touched upon is the fact: gabdhahan Somalida (or, doocilaha, as I call them [now]) are soft towards non Somali nimanka, while they are hard towards wiilasha Somalida; thus, why some brothers come to despise, disrespect and ignore them all together! I think Mohamed already answered why this is the case: cuz of ignorance; and also cuz of the fact they are more easily willing to assimilate to daqanka West-iga than Somali men (as Jibriil argued, and I think I agree). Hence, is it any wonder a brother is left to say: f*ck ****** and go for non-Somalis?? At-least you know where they stand! Hadii wiilka aadan ka helin waa caadi; laakii hadii aad ka heshay uu kuu yimiday; sababta aad isku macaneynayso (iskujajabinayso / isku walaqeyso lol, as Jibriil put it) maxey tahay; hadii doqoniimo aynan kaa aheyn? This is a general mindset which, unfortunately, is infected with a large number of gabdhaha Somalida (all over qurbaha, I guess now). So this is not a case of applying one situation to all. Just right now, aniga iyo saaxiibkey were buying coffee from a coffee shop jamacada kuyaal. And so we noticed a group of gabdho Somalis gather nearby. In which case I expressed my general attitude towards them, in which case I remarked that they are mere “retards” and that I don’t give a damn about them. In which case, my friend responded: they are immature. And this coming from a ‘neutral’ bro. This is a generally held view by the brothers (studs) in my jaamacad. Adding, he is planning to go to Italy jamacada marka naloo xiro i.e. gabdhaha Europe are not as messed up mentally. Lol For the brothers sake I hope his assumption is correct; but this is not the first time I see a brother say he is going elsewhere, be it East Africa, Europe to essentially find a nice sis. Yes, I guess it has reached that point. But personally I have not given up hope, for better or for worse. I am not yet ready to say “they are ALL like that”. But do you see the point Jibriil was making, we have a problem; there is apparent (generally) disconnect between wiilasha iyo gabdha Somalida (qurbaha); and of course, I can only talk about mostly the ones I encounter at jamacada. But then again other brothers have confirmed the fact; this is not unique to my part of the world.
Forget about anything else, as Mohamed was saying: I have also learned my lesson not to even say: As Salamu Alaykum to them. Cuz reer baadiyo-nimo (ignorance) owgeed they will get ideas. And you are saying it just because you regard her as a Somali sister! So yes, like Mohamed, before I say Hi: I now check to see ‘whether she is one who has remained in touch with her culture; or totally brainwashed (westernized). Same goes for some guys too!
This is a topic which has been killed, nay: murdered! So I have no intention of resuscitating it from death. I just wanted to add my two cents. Who knows: another brother may come along 8 years from now. Just keeping him up-to-date: same old, same old bro! Nothing has changed!! May be they are only more messed up! Hehehe
In addition, something needs has to be done about these soft brothers: oo gabdhaha u nacamleeya no matter what. These passive brothers also ruined things for us, by being too close with them girls; to the point where they (girls) can’t tell the difference between them and their female friends! And so when a real bro steps up to the plate and lets them know what’s up; the fact he is not after their friendship, but something more. They are confused, cuz she is used to the sissies.
Now I realize what Jibriil was talking about is true: we shave some of the most shallow naago. For instance, hadii wiilasha Somalida aa nahay naago ajaanib waanka dhargi karnaa; oo waan ka dharagnaa hadii aan rabno. Lakin kama fikirno in aan guursano (Muslim or not). Hada Jamacadeyda waxaa lagu haayaa Hindi, Carabiyad hehehe hadii, lama rabo ee hadii larabo cadaan waa lagu dari karaa, madowna iskaba daa. Laakiin anaga waxaa first choice noo ah naagahena. Laakiin waxaad moodaa naagaheena ajaanibka inuu first choice u yahay??? Koleyba waxba kama qabaan. Hence, the shallowness Jibriil was referring to. Ajaanib-nimada ayaa wax la ah, wax kale e.g. qurux, lacag (gold-digger) etc iskaba dhaaf! Anagana waa la iskukeen khatar aa la iskagakeen dhigaa! Ufff The university I go to; waxba la iskuma darso, waana laga buuxaa (Somali). And I know this is not a phenomenon unique to our jamacad. Like Mohamed was talking about, the Somali “lady” on the bus. Nimanka kale way la qosleysa laakiin markii wiilal Somali ah ay soo koreen salanta wayku cabtay!
In conclusion, I am just glad, we as Somali man banaanka kama guursano (except for the few losers). Cuz in the end, we are the ones who are expected to continue our race. Cidii fuuleysa dhoocilaha ha fuulaan! Although, truth be told, easier said than done – at-least as far as I am concerned. I know there are others too. I wish, like some brothers, whenever I see naag Somali ah oo ajaanib lasocoto; I could just careless cuz she is not my sister!
For clarification: when I speak about naagahan. I am referring to naagaha
Somalida qurbaha (not all, but a lot) oo jaahilnimo iyo bilaa dhaqan-nimo isku darsaday.
To the Feminists and sissies: this is not the “rant of a dumped brother” Hehehehehe Wallahi. Alhamdulillah, quruxlow iyo cute ayey gabdhaha iigu wacaan (& know: he who boasts is a like a goat sucked by itself). And I am confident, I could have the girl I spoke off; if I wanted to, she seems to regret. But wont, not cuz of pride; but cuz of the fact she let me know who she is: immature. The reason I am talking about this she is not the only one who conducting herself as such. I know other brother have encountered similar thing: they like you but act they don’t. But if you are confortable begging and keep going back for seconds, that is ok. But some of us just don’t beat around the bush and walk with our head held high.
I heard they reason they play such games with the brothers and not others, is cuz they are afraid they brother will talk; whereas the foreigner won’t. I know a lot of us are not b*tches like that; but I heard there are a lot of us who gave us such a bad rap. But I don’t know how this argument defends the conduct of gabdahaha Somalida; it just says they are bad and to make matters worse, they are hypocrites too
In conclusion, I just want to say I tip my hat off to Jibriil for speaking the truth. It takes a lot of balls to speak the truth; whereas it takes none bilaash sida naagaha looga daba nacamleeyo: the poor bro was dumped blah blah.
I can’t address all topics covered nor discuss my views about the subject. So I stop my book here. hehehehehehehehehe
P.S. EID AL ADHA MUBARAK
C/S.