wow. My boy looks good nowdays! Marki hore caatonimadisa way iga yara nixin jirtey. But he looks might FINE now. His performance was THE performance on the opening night. He was magical. You should check the blogs, Canadians are claiming him and some British too, LOL! You should see all the Mali kids gettin mad and yelling He IS SOMALI!

3,4,5? How on earth do you function? I HAVE to sleep for 8 or 9 hours or I will be in a crappy mood, biting people's head off!

Seeing that Flag made me cry. It was a beautiful performance! Ka'naan, you did us proud! Somaliya ha noolato! Beautiful! Here decends the Naysayers, people who rather talk about how many reer hebel died today than PRAISE the single most significant performance of the opening by a SOMALI MAN on world stage. UFF! Hadey lasoo ordayaan but but but Somalia is no.....

cool! drop me a PM then?

Seeker, are you involved in the community center? I volunteered every summer at the Cedar Community Center since I was in high school except the last one. I'm planning on going back. I would like to know if there are other mentoring programs besides the ones going on at Brian Coyle.

Ala! I need an eye check up ASAP! That woman is wearing hijab or khamaar? I thought that was her hair or a wig? Even if it is Khamaar(and I need glasses) why top it like an ice cream cone? Sida kale she is beautiful and I would like to give her some make up tips! Abaayo if you happen to read SOL, try nude lipstick or Mac or Bobby Brown lip stain.

LOL@Cara. I'd read that book. Canjeex, did you read the part where I said I still can't bring myself to go eat a lone or see movies a lone. Funny thing, I watched a movie, a very girly movie(S& the City)last night. The theatre was packed with mostly women(who were way overdressed! Sheesh! you would think they were playing a part in the movie). So my friends and I sat in the back. So few minutes before the light goes out, in walks in this gorgeously dressed woman. She sat the row below us. Then the movie started. Midway through the movie, my friends noticed that the pretty woman is sitting by herself and laughing her head off. My friends just about died of a heart attack! LOL! The couldnt understand. The even wanted to invite her to sit next to us.

Uh-Oh!

Oh! I used to love working out with my friends. We are competitive. We used to push each other. But then after we are done, it takes forever for them to get out of there, which made the gym a whole afternoon affair, which made me tired. So now, I go on my own and it is so peaceful. I love it.

Was that a question? I didnt get it.

LOL@Cara. Good question! Even though I would argue that NO ONE thinks badly of themselves; they're merely reflecting on what they think others think of them. This preoccupation with SELF reminds me of a quote(i dont remember who) that said "when every need of the need of the body is met, we're left to battle a host of psychological ailments." Ps.. George W. Bush has a healthy self-esteem, how else could he have run a whole country to the ground confidently? haatu Do you enjoy your 'Me' time? All those things you've mentioned are fine, but we're talking about doing social things on your own. So you're still uncomfortable being a lone?

I see what you're saying Allamagan. The tell-tale signs are there early on. Sometimes, it is not the wedding-hopping single mother stereotype. Sometimes it is the opposite. I have a neighbor who is a single mother. She is very religious(full niqaab and Jalbaab), always at the local Mosque helping and leading the women. She has two twin boys who are known as the "TWIN TERROR" in the neighborhood. They're were very difficult even as toddlers. I used to watch them when I was in middle school and I used to always have scratches and blood drawn. Now they're in middle school. The woman's ex left her just when the twins were born, in fact days after. He is now married. He doesnt take care of the kids. She has them full time. So there is no father influence at all. The mother doesnt work, go to school or even drive. She acts like she is back home. Only going out for grocery shoping and dugsi period! Her twins are now grown and abusing her and everyone. They've been on the police radar(mind you they're only in middle school). It is the classic family- break down sydrome to the T. The last time I saw her, I told her that she needed to do something about her boys. She said "ilaahay baa toosin doono" I said, IA but you need to get to them now! You need to find them strong mentors and decipline them. You need to become a stronger role model; get a JOB ASAP, Learn English, become mobile so that you rely on no one. It is sad because even at that age, you can see that they question her authority.

OH NO Blessed. Kaa xanaaqo? Never. You are as sweet as butter! Some self-help books I cant handle specially, the new age-y stuff about the Universe and stuff! So I hear you. I'm still with my group of besties from childhood. I was reflecting on that the other night. I havent made a single new friend since I hit 18. I tend to be shy and hate confrontations and dramas. LOL! Nuune, Dont all topics on SOL deviate? LOL!

Thank you!

Seeker, I didnt think you were angry, just a bit irritated. And I get that. For some reason, I have this overwhelming feeling that the failure of our people reflect on me. So when I say see a somali child or adult behaving senseless in front of people, I cringe and can't help but feel embarrased. Now Ibti will come in any second and scold me by telling me that I should stop feeling that way and that we're all individuals. I believe you on the behavior of Somali kids and I agree that it is getting worse. But I caution against putting the blame squarely on this enviorenment. When My mother tells me horrid tales about Somali kids chasing the blind, stonning poor animals to death and bullying the mentally ill in front of their parents and the tight-knit community we all lement, I question the so called akhlaaq and humanity we supposedly lost during the war. I only ask one question and one question only: will our kids succeed in this society if we continue on the path we are on? Maybe or maybe not. What can we do? We can do two things; first address the problem by raising awareness. Secondly, offer parenting classes that are culturally concious. EVEN if only mothers show up, we've won half the battle. The lack of Somali men's involvement in child rearing is cultural. Maybe some of our young men can address that issue?

A hot, foamy Lattee anyday!

Seeker, LOL! Take a deep breath! I hate to say this; but aren’t you exaggerating a bit? I mean I know sometimes things can be so overwhelming. I too attended 5 graduations(two middle schools, 2 high schools and one college)where children and teens were present. No fights broke out and no police was inconvenienced. Sometimes, this mentality of woo is us has more negative impact. Somali children have always been unruly and stubborn. But reality is more Somali people follow the laws of this country than say Mexicans and Blacks. But sadly because of our visible difference in both culture and religion we tend to stick out like a sore thumb. And every incident is exaggerated to the tenfold. Do you know how many stores have been robbed, how many homicides took place, how many policemen got hurt and how many deaths in the state of MN since that shooting at Sewards? Many, MANY! Yet they’re still talking about that everywhere you go. Sometimes I think we are under a magnifying glass, every flaw exaggerated. But I do agree with you on one point. Somali parents are way over their head when it comes to child rearing in this country. They’re simply not equipped with dealing with this environment. Most of them tend to parent the way they were parented. Maybe it is about time we had parenting classes?

LOL@"you boring people"! Ok Farax. Let me make my distinction of the two words clearer. A lone could mean solitude or being by yourself. In this context, a lone means no friends, family, or associates. You amongst strangers. Loneliness is often unwanted seclusion or emptiness. Loneliness is a state of mind. It is feeling unimportant or undesirable.

You're right! You always get me thinking Sheh. It has a lot to do with fear of judgement from people. When you are out there traveling, or grocery shopping or at a coffee shop, no one is going to point at you and say "I guess she is lonely"! But when you are out dinning by yourself or at a movie, I guess the judgement pours. LOL! I shall practice. I agree with you about the self-help books. It is a start. It gets you thinking, reflecting on your actions and change directions if need arises. I am a book lover so I read anything under the sun except cook books. LOL! Books also open your mind to a whole another world. Most of the time we are wraped up in our own little world. We tend to think our experiences are singular and we tend to stick with what we know. But when you read about a woman or a man in Tibet or Bali having the same doubts, fears, questions about a particular experience or life in general, it is a sobering moment. You kind have an AHA moment.

If a child is likely to have a life full of pain and suffering is that a reason against bringing the child into existence? If a child is likely to have a happy, healthy life, is that a reason for bringing the child into existence? Is life worth living, for most people in developed nations today? Is a world with people in it better than a world with no sentient beings at all? Would it be wrong for us all to agree not to have children, so that we would be the last generation on Earth? Ok. Lets walk through this argument. First of all, the probability of a child having a "hard" life is not certain. Even if both parents have a debilitating disease or mental defect, the chances of that kid inheriting the disease might be higher but no one can say for certain the child will be born with the disease. Other circumstances such poverty and lack of resources are trivial because we all know the only constant thing in life is change. You never know who this child might grow up to become. History is full of people from dire situations who made tremendous gains. So NO not being able to guarantee a successful life is not a reason to sterilize yourself. To your second question, most people don’t have children because their children will have a happy life. They have children because they have a need for a family. They want to nurture and take care of another human being. They want to leave their name behind since they wont be here forever. Life is worth living for most. It is absolutely the most precious thing in the world! And that’s why we are so obsessed preserving it, improving it, prolonging it and we are in awe of the miracle of it. I think it is absolutely silly to entertain or suggest a world with no people since you and I wont exist and wont be able to define what “better” means. Your last question was a bit tough because I’m tempted to go the religion route but I wont. First of all, what is the need for becoming the last generation on earth? What are the motivations? Why we wouldn’t want to continue the way we lived for millions of years?

Masha'llah! May they walk the rightious path.

Whoa! My peepz. First of all, not all the books I read are self-help books. I read a lot! I read non-fiction, memoirs of successful people, and ocassionally self-help books. I love the Awaken the Giant Within. If you ever read one self-help book in your life, read this. Coming back to the topic, I never said being with people displays low self-esteem. The question was are you content with being by yourself and doing things by yourself. Now, to be a bit honest. I was never comfortable doing things by myself because growing up I had several girlfriends who also lived right next to me. So anytime of the day and night a friend was available if I ever needed to go somewhere. Then we started college(we went to different schools) I noticed myself getting a bit weird whenever I needed to do things on my own so I would take my little sis with me. I wanted to get rid of the uncomfortable feeling of walking a lone and doing things a lone. It is not about being antisocial or self-worth. Truth is MANY MANY people are NOT comfortable being by themselves. They HAVE to be around people to feel validated. But even with my "progress" to this day, I cant go to a movie by myself or go to a restaurant and eat on my own. But I'm working on it! But I can go shopping by myself and to bookstores, and coffee shops myself. I love going to the gym by myself! I must say it is liberating!

No I missed it. What do you mean, not come upstairs? LOL!

Che, When you are doing things by yourself, do you intentionally do it or it just so happens. For instance, going grocery shopping and intentionally turning off your cell phone on Sunday afternoon so that you can take a walk or read a book under a tree are two different things. Nuune, xageed aaday? Marki aan ku fahmi jirin aa la gaaray. Let me clarify. I meant alone as in being by yourself without a partner, friend, co-worker, neighbor etc. Just you, going about your day and doing things you normally would do with friends such as eating, shopping, seeing movies or walking on a lake. You brought up a good point which is enjoyment. Do you enjoy being by yourself or are you comfortable? Juxa, Kudos to you! I’m working towards eating by myself. There is something to be said about self sufficiency. If you’re someone who doesn’t mind being alone, you have certain freedom from anxieties that plague the human soul. They say you’re better at coping with situations such as break up or divorce than someone who is dependant and needy. And oh yeah, I don’t EVER most of the books. I just get them from the library or read them for free at Bookstores. LOL!

I'm into personal devolopment and growth nowdays. I read all sorts of books. So most of the books I read so far deal with human emotions. Several focus on deep seated fears and anxiety about being alone(NOTE: NOT LONELY BUT ALONE). The author says, we are born ALONE and we leave this world ALONE and this simple fact causes us tremendous pain since we dont know where we will end up. Therefore, we latch on to other people, bad habits and false hopes because of this fear of being alone. One of the books has an exercise where the reader is challanged to treat themselves to a day or a night out. Just by yourself. So my question is do you take yourself out? And do you enjoy it when you're out on your own? So far I can only treat myself to a coffee at a bookstore. I cant bring myself to eat by myself or see a movie by myself.