is this an acceptable avatar?

lol

As usual...a country tryin to institute full shariah with only chosen ways to apply it...example...punishing the woman while looking the other way for the man....what type of islam are they following? Thats' why im a big advocate of let ppl be judged by God, not mere humans who are not always objective and who cannot always use religion the way its suppose to....also institute their own cultural values rather than embracing ALL that islam entails..which is, punish both if found at fault, not just the one that their "shame" becomes known... Free the poor soul..

FF, we must not speak thusly of The Great One, be careful, we might get banished from his great presence and we don't want that to happen do we? what will happen to us without The Great One? I shudder to even contemplate Ng, hello! u didnt tell me how i can install it....remember, im pc challenged...wheres' all the steps... :confused: ....and i don't like that one, its not quite as submissive as i wanted to be, it screams strong woman, which im not by far :cool:

Ng, ever modest and helpful, if only there were more men like u around...i wouldn't be so naive as to go into this world alone and misguided...may god bless u with extra humility...amen! p.s.-about my avatar....care to help me? im pc challenged apart from biting arrogant ppl's heads off, which u are not part of, i assure u on mother teresa's grave... :cool:

FF...right on point about our dear old know-it-all...if only we were as smart as Ng...lets say a prayer and an amen! :rolleyes:

Ahem....ppl in glass houses shouldn't be throwing stones.... :rolleyes: Rudy, when u point fingers every which way, remember there are 10 more pointed at u....ever heard of the projection theory? ur projecting ur own fears on women, perhaps ur wife...dig deep and look at urself b4 calling others shady... lol@layzie...likewise...

Thxs Ng, for once again blowing things outa proportion and insinuating ur own backward and highly emotional thoughts, i see that i hit a nerve and if u dont wanna get tested, thats on u, dont hide behind me dear boy...u seem to have missed the whole point and the word "might"...therefore not generalizing but giving a possible answer as to why some ppl shy away from it.... p.s.-dont let fasting get to ur head...in due time u might regain what few brain cells u had to begin with....ciao

For those of u who are anti-test, might that be cause maybe U got something to hide/got a skeleton in ur closet ud rather not reveal? or if its just a personal choice, be smart about it. Think of ur partner and ur future kids, dont look at it as a trust issue because too often, ppl who have certain diseases do not know about it themselves and contrary to popular belief, u dont need to be sexually active to have certain diseases. Example..lets say i went for a physical and the doctor ordered a blood test..and the needle that was used happened to have been one already used on an HIV person, then here innocent me, become positive w/o knowing...then i meet wonderful farax, have a few kids and what do the test reveal? i have passed down an std to my child, husband...not being my fault, not because i was promiscuous prior to marriage, etc...when all i had to do, for the sake of my future kids and hubby and most importantly for my own health, was getting myself tested before i can potentially put someone's life at risk....comprende amigos? Gracias... Moral of the example was, get urself tested, wont hurt, and if ur a chicken like me and hate needles, ask for a baby needle ....the person ur marrying could A-lie to u about their past...B-not know if for some reason they were infected w/o knowing....C-not wanna find out b/c they are afraid of the answers...but ask urselves this...would ur rather die in moderally good health, or breathing through a ventilator cause ur pride got in the way of testin urself? p.s.-didnt know coming from a good family made one immune's system reject STDS...then im all set then....wooohoo!!! thxs for that tip :rolleyes:

Diamante, I guess i spoke too soon, when the likes of Rudy crashed our Aunty-Red party.....Rudy, if u dont like talking about something that is perfectly natural, I suggest u re-take sex ed 101 and ask about the woman's body and its function...i woulda thought having a wife woulda matured u but, i guess u cant teach old dogs new tricks :rolleyes: As for mood swings, sometimes i think Hitler was my long lost twin,...and talk about the roller coaster of emotions...happy, sad, depressed, happy again...frustrated, irritated, happy again....prozak anyone?...and cravings, they become too much sometimes, now i undertstand why women may gain up to 80lbs...u cant think , sleep until u get the exact thing u crave... Qac, its ramadan and im in a good mood...so take it for what its worth... peace

Glad to see some men are open minded and liberal enuff to talk about issues that are thought of as a taboo in our society, when in reality, its just human nature. Ladies, when the monthly days of agony arrive, a warm bath helps a lot, also, i agree with the person that suggested excercise, because the more you keep your body moving, the less cramps you will feel. of course some of us would rather not get out of bed , especially the first day,but after that, take the time out to take a walk...keep urself busy and not dweel on the fact that ur losing a few gallons of blood throughout ur lifetime ...and depending on the severity of ur cramps, midol might not do the trick, i suggest visit your doctor and ask for a higher dose. p.s.-what about mood swings? a week or so b4 ur time, and cravings we get...how do u ladies deal with that and is there something that alleviates it or helps? peace and ramadan kareem to all

Rudy, i dont know whether to laugh or feel sorry for u....how about both? Anyways, Islamically, whatever ur wife desires and if it is within ur means, U should be able to give to her, provided she fulfills her half of the bargain as well. Gold, to many somali woman, is a simple of modest wealth, for lack of better words...and also is adorned in weddings, special occassions, etc...so its not like she's asking for plantinum, cause then ud be in big trouble.. But...like u said, she didnt want gold in the beginning yet wants it now? i call that false advertising...ppl are allowed to change their minds, so give her this small gift, im sure she'll reward u in ways we can't speak of here... "so now what gives!! is gold really that import to yall!! then what the difference between yall and the other lady selling her love at corner! shame on yall sistas!" Did u just realize u may have called ur wife a "prostitute"? :eek: ...u must apologise at once to her or I'll tell on u... :mad:

Your Energy is Orange. Restless at times, you are a very focused self starter. People with orange energy are organized, inspirational and design concious. You are confident in your abilities and like to be in control. You would make a good architect, teacher, designer, or entreprenuer.

Looks like a homosexual shemale trying to come to grips with his/hers/"it" reality, doing anything that may further "its" goal, and if thats polishing USA's butt, then "it" looks more than ready and willing to jump to the task. What a disgrace! or could it just simply be an iraqi woman with an abundant testosterone? :eek:

Gedid, no u didn't, lol...i just wanted to ask u, since u said its better to start at home, have u done anything back home or with ur fellow mates that can help young ladies avoid FGM? if not, why stand in the way of those that want to make changes here and raise awareness... in any case, ur right, im on the last chapter, and ur still in the middle, hopefully u'll catch up...

Its not for me to speak for them, but only for myself...if i were married and my husband did that, then i would ask for my papers cause thats a big no-no! if he's frustrated, or had a bad day at work or whatever, there are better ways of communicating than connecting ur palm to my soft cheeks, and need i also say, i hate imprints! imagine what it would look like, a rosy glow that i didnt ask for... But for those on the lenient side,id say, do whats best for them, but if its more than once and /or escalates, then they should leave because its not a healthy environment for them or their kids. Also, if the husband is truly repentant, then he should seek some psychological help because its obvious that he cannot control or channel his anger in a proper way.

Ohh...Ohh...shoot, i promised not to bug u anymore...i'll let that one slide

"Remember, we were talking about the first “slap†ending a marriage, we were not talking about the first time a woman is put in hospital or anything of the sort. Would your list above apply to such things then? Or, like the sister above, are you going to skirt round the issue and say that you’ve been talking only about the “bad†guys all along?" Ok, let me see if i get ur murky points. Ur sayin that a slap won't always lead to the consequences i mentioned earlier, and i am saying, why wait around to see what else he can do? if someone slapped u, they are getting their message across to u that u can be controlled and subdued when the mood arises, so pray tell, why should i wait around to see when he just might think a slap isn't getting me to see the "light". I don't know how many languages to tell u that domestic abuse is wrong, and that even a lil slap constitutes as such in my book. any other qs i can enlighten u on? Now I should get paid for this

Ok Gedid, ur off the hook, but one more question b4 u run for cover? Don't u think ppl in America are composed of more than just europeans? ie-immigrants from asia, africa, etc...therefore won't raising the issue of FGM be relevant? if not, tell me why not... Peace

Gedid, says who no help will come if u talk about it? the more ppl know, the more ppl will leave the cave of ignorance and see the light. Maybe those in the class may not be able to help directly, but think of that one chic in class who u may help by voicing ur opinion that FGM is wrong and she will break the cycle and later in life not inflict that on her daughters. U see? its a chain, and just b/c u dont see an immediate gain, doesnt mean its wrong to talk about it.

"If you’re going to say wife beating is wrong (which of course it is) you need to give good and valid reasons why you think it is." Isnt that an oxymoron? wife beating is wrong but prove to me why its wrong? hello? sorry, i cannot debate with someone with faulty logic. if someone needs to tell u why its wrong to raise ur hand against someone else, then u need a lil' more education in proper etiquette and human interaction my dear. :rolleyes: Domestic Violence 101: why is it wrong u ask? 1-emotional abuse (leaves scars that ur dear jerry springer u refered to won't heal) 2-physical abuse 3-may lead to fear of men in general 4-if ur kids see u doing it, they might think since daddy is doing it, it must be the right way in dealing with women 5-its a controlling issue 6-men who do it want to assert their dominance and superiority over the female.. need i go on? i could refer u to a few crisis hotlines and shelters, maybe u can go there and "dare" them in all ur righteousness why its wrong to beat em. I get it though, u wanna be right, and if sticking up for abusers is ur way, by all means, wear the proud gear and strut ur stuff!

"I agree we need to solve our problems from the inside not from the outside and presenting an essay on FGM to a class made up of 99% foreigners is to me the outside.It will only recieve a gasp of shock and in no way will a gasp be a solution." Gedid, do u fear that once these foreigners see whats goin on in our culture, that some might deem us "uncivilized"? well guess what, they already do, who cares what a few ignorants think....the point is, those who wanna write about it are doing it to raise global awareness, not to gain sympathy from a few blonds. Its ok to share and let others know if this is happening in ur society, that it is wrong, if everyone kept it a secret, then how can anything be resolved in the end? Peace

Gedid and Dangerous, u sound like u want to sweep all ur cultures' problems under the rug, how can one's society be improved if u dont admit the wrongs in it and try to make it better? Its like an alcoholic saying he's doesnt have a drinking problem but hes getting better w/o first admitting he has a problem... I doubt she's doing it for her personal gain and i take offense when brothers lightly dismiss FGM as a thing of the past or something unpleasant they rather not talk about. Instead of having menial talks about the 50 ways somalia can split btwn all the vying clans, how about some of u put ur efforts into trying to heal the country from the inside b4 u can decide what can be done with the outside...

Will the ignorance never end? :eek: ... Lets do the flip side...let's say a white racist got his KKK gear in knots about them damn niggers getting not one afro-american class, but a whole dept just for them? who do they think they are? we got them off the boat, made them "civilized", and now they want to shove it down our throat to learn about them? with my hard earned tax money? no way! what is the benefit of learning about niggers? How does that feel? some of u might say its an extreme example or that the two cannot be compared, but i object...racism is the fight to free all ppl from being judged for their race, color, creed, helping them ovecome racism in schools, work, judicial system, ect... Feminism also falls under the umbrella of racism, it too fights for those issues as well, since many women deal with their own issues as well as issues of race and such, and its not only limited to women's liberation, but humanity as a whole. It is still struggling for equal pay, glass ceiling at work being overcome, FGM, etc....there are dif branches of feminism though, some are anti-racist, some are elitists, and i dont approve of those that fight for gay rights and such, but the overall message is a good one that needs to be taken seriously w/o being so easily dismissed by a few farax that feel that their position in their future households might be threatened if the woman all of a sudden starts demanding her god given rights....also, we know any "ism" can't compare to Islam, but if everyone did as Islam dictated, we wouldnt need any organization to fight for the underdog's rights. p.s.-b4 u judge, have any of u taken a women's studies class w/o u already having pre-conceived notions and myths that all feminists are man haters a inch short of sporting a beard? Read up on it, with an open mind, then maybe u can discuss it, but usually ppl judge what they fear. So whats ur fear about feminism? Peace

Ng, I see that i hit a nerve and its quite hilarious to see u floundering..hehe...anyways, u're wayyyy off base with reality, but if ur world is full of fantasy, who am i to burst ur bubble? Im extremely happy that my father was never that type of man, but can u truly say u arent that type? Maybe thats why ur ready to dig a dagger in my eye, cause i feared i came to close to home... .....u want a simple answer if hitting is on top of our list for a marriage breaker? well duh!!!! if we're saying that's the worst thing a man can do, then it is on top of our list, but if u need it spelled out, yes! a slap and we're through, because a man is never just overcome with the need to hit, there must be a history, therefore will also be a recurrence if he does not seek help....not to say there arent those that can be rehabilitated, but how many somali husbands have u seen owning up to it and seeking professional help? nada! zilch, zero... In any case, u said u werent making excuses, instead of asking everyone to look back at what they wrote, why dont U and see the times when u were giving excuses, about a man maybe being tired, dif factors involved, ect,....what amazes me about u is that u dont give credit to an opposing view , rather trying to cut it down so that u may shine in all ur false glory. Well, may the force be with u! p.s.-emotions, is that the new male lingo? every time a woman speaks, she must be all in knots, but when u do, dear robot, u are entirely objectional arent u? hmmm